Wow. There's nothing worse than an astoundingly arrogant fanfic writer going out of their way to crap on kids trying to figure out how to write. Don't listen to this douchebag, kids, you write your Mary Sue and make her perfect.

OMG...I spit my drink on my iPad. Thankfully, it was only water. Do not make me laugh like this again, or you will suffer consequences similar to those outlined above...

Ooooh! 'in a pernicious, subversive, unjustor irreverent manner.' Doesn't 'unjustor' break the Empire's own rules about stories being correctly punctuated?

'"like" has no grammatical function except as a preposition,' - so as well as not being allowed to use it as an interjection, as a noun (as in 'I got twenty-three likes for this story,' or even, 'It's important to know your master's likes and dislikes,'), it can't even be a verb? Is this a sign of the Empire's bitterness over not being liked by anyone?

From my own experience, I'm fairly sure the Empire has stopped throttling or frying anyone who submits documents without a blank line between paragraphs, and just employs droids to insert these. Unfortunately, the droids interpret every line of any poem I write as a separate paragraph (so that I can't make a distinction between a new line and a new stanza). They have also been taking out every section break I include within a chapter (a line of asterisks or similar) to indicate a different scene, different POV character, or similar.

Misspellings of names: this annoys me too, but considering that the original Star Wars novel spelled 'Wookie' with one E instead of two, I think there is room for flexibility here. Bear in mind that species whose culture does not include a language written in the Basic alphabet may have been listening to reports in the form of audiobooks.

For a fanfic which the Empire might not mind too much (ambiguously evil Empire; sympathetic portrayals of Palpatine and Darth Maul; Qui-Gon Jinn inadvertently caused most of the problems by making stupid decisions and refusing to listen to Darth Maul; evil Han, whom we first see cold-bloodedly murdering a pilot in order to steal his ship), has everyone read the webcomic Darths and Droids? This is funny and likable (if Rebels can stomach the wildly alternative characterisation of practically everyone), but the Empire might be irritated by the running joke of one of the characters, Jim, getting virtually every name wrong. This begins when he mishears 'Jedi' as 'Cheddar', and from then on, conflates virtually everything with a food - Tattooine is Ratatouille, Coruscant is Croissant, Bail Organa is Basil Oregano, and so on. My favourite moments of Jim malapropisms are when he, having just stolen the Millennium Falcon and needing to learn how to fly it before his passengers realise he has never been on it before, styles himself 'Master of the Malteser Falcon' (if American readers haven't come across them, Maltesers are a type of candy); and where he refers to TIE fighters as PIE fighters (rationalising that it must stand for Plasma Ion Engine), and from then on, all the Rebels refer to the Empire 'throwing PIEs at them'. See:

www. darthsanddroids episodes/0001. html

This is so great! Very nicely done and absolutely accurate.

Gods, that is hilarious! A tiny bit though I wish that there actually was an empire enforcing those rules - for obvious reasons...

This was hilarious.

Absolutely wonderful and really hilarious. pretty cool

This is brilliant. The rules are great. I'll make sure to always obey edicts of his High Imperial Majesty the Emperor.

LOL!

I love this. Palpatine has given up on stopping them, so if they have to do it, they're going to do it well.
Did you know that under these rules you could still write a Palpatine x Palpatine fic, as long as he moans enough about how boring it is dealing with tax evasion and you include the actual cloning?

I love this. Palpatine has given up on stopping them, so if they have to do it, they're going to do it well.
Did you know that under these rules you could still write a Palpatine x Palpatine fic, as long as he moans enough about how boring it is dealing with tax evasion and you include the actual cloning?

Laughed quite a bit at footnote number seven.
"We apologize for any inconvenience this may cause you or your loved ones."

Blatant propaganda aside, I believe you have more than a few readers sympathising with the points you have made. I myself will drop even a promising story at first sight of the dreaded 'Wall of Text.'

God bless.
TeraWatt

Funny

Brava! Great way to mock all those major and minor annoyances we keep seeing here and there on FFnet and AO3.
It seems that some laws of the Empire make an astonishing amount of sense.

While a great deal of this was something Imperials might rule- the content about His Imperial Majesty, the Emperor Palpatine, for example, and other similar such rules- there were also a lot of good points made in regards to the Planet Dirt(also known as Planet Terra, or even as Planet Earth, to the natives)'s fanfiction content. All in all, I summarily approve of this enjoyable content.