Wow, very detailed story. Written really well

Hummmm... Interesting how you have Tenten in this story, I love them together. :)

um. you misspelled the word 'tong' it's supposed to be 'tongue'. just so you'll know :)) It's a great story by the way. Is Tenten pregnant in the end?

I enjoyed that fight scene at the start, though I did feel bad for Lee. The concept of levitation fascinated me (it reminded me of superconductors and the Meissner effect to some degree ...) and I liked how you added that skill to her growing arsenal. Overall, I enjoyed the explanation of the bond between Neji and Tenten, I thought it was very well done. I loved the fact that there was no sap and yet it was quite romantic (it's a skill I have yet to develop ...).

But, (yes, there is a but, I'm sorry) I do have a minor gripe. Understandably, spelling errors occur even to those who check carefully and to some degree I am fine with it as long as our understanding of the story is not that badly affected. However, when a spelling error invariably changes the meaning of words, thus resulting in confusion and/or interruption when reading the sentences ... I get annoyed. Now, I'm hoping that my understanding is indeed correct and that I'm not about to make a fool of myself when I suggest a couple of 'corrections'. If it was indeed your intention to have it like that, then I apologise in advance. However, if it was indeed a slight error on your part, then I hope you're not offended by my corrections. The following suggestions are a mixture of ordinary spelling corrections, queries and spelling corrections where the word has changed meaning - it's just a quick browse mind you, just the ones that caught my eye as I read.

In chronological order:

1) "I may not have had a gekenki ..." (I believe you meant a "gekai/gekkai (not actually sure myself ...) kenkai" ?)

2) "Being an elite ANBU had given his some perks that were outside just the tilde." (What did you mean by tilde? As far as I know, a tilde is one of those squiggly symbols used in the Spanish language or Maths ...)

3) "Tsnade loved to use us like her own perusal death team." (I believe Tsunade may need a "u". :) And perusal? o.O Did you mean "personal"? With my limited understanding of the word perusal, I felt that it somehow ... didn't match up with the rest of the sentence.)

4) "It was amazing how the affect of loosing guy had had on him." (Not too fussed about the spelling of Guy/Gai's name ... just wished it was capitalised. Same with Lee's name. Also, I think effect is the more appropriate word here.)

5) "charka" "chakra"

6)"Energy and power reradiated from him like a warring beckon for any idiot that dare try to waste his time in a challenge." (Ok, I don't think energy and power need to 'reradiate' from him. Radiate is probably enough. "Warring beckon". They sort of make sense on their own - has the effect of an oxymoron ... but somehow, I thought that "warning beacon" might have been the term you were after. I could be wrong.)

7) "He made his way to the large flat room that we kept all of our bed roles in." (Bed rolls?)

8) "tong" "tongue"

9) "Her earlobe fit beautify in my mouth as I worked it with my tong. My reword was the slight gasps she was making at my menstruations." ("beautifully", "reward", "ministrations". I seriously hope you meant ministrations and not mentruations.)

10) "His muscle was taunt in resisting his body. " (Did you mean "taut", rather than taunt? Or did you actually mean taunt? I'm confused either way ...)

11) "My senesces heightened." ("senses"?)

12) "I was defiantly done for the night ..." (Though grammatically correct, I felt that "definitely" might have been the better word."

13) "... made my way around the room to find his forgot shirt." ("forgotten" shirt?)

14) "I already reeked of the man and had most of her personality" ("his" rather than her?)

15) "... but Neji would want to eat a hoarse and an entire heard of wildebeest when he woke. " (Hoarse is not a noun ... I believe you meant horse?)

These were the main ones that caught my eye and bugged me. There are a couple of others I've ignored (and maybe others that I've missed) but they didn't bug me as much so left them alone. Again, I don't mean to offend, just providing some constructive criticism. I hope you don't take this the wrong way. It's still a lovely story first an foremost.

Good story, but I would recommend a beta. Some sentences don't make sence and that kind of kills the flow and mood of the story. Besides that, the characters were very convinsing. Great job.

wow. thats all i have.

It's a good story, not one of the best but it's okay.

You need to work on your gramar and do a spell check.

wow it was dark in a really really nice and great way! lol i loved it! it wasn't those lovey dovey fanfics nor those gruesome sad one either it was just perfect! i really enjoyed it! especially the lemon 0~ lol i especially liked the part when tenten kept him in her hahaha i LOVED that part! hehehe yeah so anywaise once again great story, i could on and on and it still wouldn't be enough!

It was like am movie in my head! I loved it how they understood each other so well and that they lived so far away from everyone else and that whole idea where Neji and Tenten trained together for so long in which allowed her to win against Lee yeah that was awesome!

And then the part where Neji comes and then automatically he showers her with his chakra kya~ thats just so romantic and cute! And i thought it was a bit erotic when Tenten just touches him and gah! that whole scene was just so great! and i loved how you made Neji all loving towards her but not too loving and still Neji it wasn't OCC at all which im grateful for you for that!

Now for the critism...

It was a bit hard to understand who's POV it was because you kept changing she/he's in the same paragraph. i think it would be easier on the reader if you just automatically say Neji's POV etc...and then LASTLY! there were some miss spellings and you wsort've mixed first person with 3rd person on the same scene which isnt a bad thing when used correctly but it just didn't really go..so yeah...BUT THATS ALL THE BAD THING I HAVE TO SAY!

other than that I loved this story! so please revise this so more people won't give up on this story because i know a lotta ppl do becuz of misspellings and all that stuff and they NEED to read this story its just so incredibly awesome!

OMG. I love it. it expresses the bond that Neji and Tenten share/should share perfectly and I don't care how many reviews you get, I believe a sequel is necessary... Pretty Please?

I love this FIC! Some grammar problems but still, you need to make a sequel! Please

Touchier is not a word. Try reading your stuff before you submit it so that it makes sense, you've got typos all over the place.

loved this story I keep coming back to read it again sweet story line in a way with out losing touch on what they are only improvement I could see was some minor grammer stuff other wise great story

Make another damn it! That was just pure awesome!

3 fo' eva'

Sachiko

I liked it but for future reference when speaking of the time of day it is spelle morning. Well I like it and hope you will write a sequel! Oh and is Tenten pregnent?

awsum u hav ta wryt sequel... check spelling nd grammer tho. lol