Oh this was good. Im glad tony found her in time. And i agree with the person below me she doesnt always have to have her dads last name. You did really good. Forget her. lol. Loved it D

First of all this is for the nasty review before mine-LOGISTICALLY(wrong word usage there) Ziva and Gibbs' daughter does not necessarily have to have her father's last name. If you read any of Sarah Shaloms stories prior to this you would know that Sarah is Sarah DAVID not Sarah Gibbs.

Oh, and what gives you the right to blast her stories in the 1st place? Who cares if she doesn't care her story is short. Do you realize not everyone who writes on here is from America and dialect and english/language is DIFFERENT? You should for someone who is in their 30s and married. Sarah happens to be a friend of mine(not personally-but still) I think you should just let her be the kind of writer she wants to be and if you don't like it then like she's said before don't read it.

Love the story!

I read this mostly out of curiosity. It looks like you had the beginnings of an interesting story but pushed most of it through so it feels rushed and disconnected.

Logistically, wouldn't Ziva and Gibbs' daughter have her father's last name? Also, if in your author's notes you say that you don't care that it's short or that there is lacking in the way you told your story, how do you expect anyone else to?

It doesn't seem to invite readers to give any other stories you would have on offer to be bothered with them.

The story idea itself seems to have some merit and I sincerely hope you will maybe go back to it on another occasion and choose to flesh out the story and give it some meat.