What's up with the i.../i ? It's really annoying

Very, very cute. I enjoyed this a lot. A very unusual couple but I dig it!

Wonderful piece of art... I wish other people should learn how sex can be represented so softly, delicately and heart-touche, yet though it has been explicit but never appeared vulgar anytime! Hat's off man...

And the punch line "If he was healthy, he wouldn't be Jeff Moreau" just left me spellbound...

You have gift of words. Keep up the good work

Vivid. You really know your love scenes. Faving.

Your decision of sending Mordin back with the rescued crewmembers are wise. With perhaps also having emotional problems after being abducted - and stored in melter pods (what's the term, I forgot) - she might have problem treating the others, thus needing the undoubtedly skillful assistance from him.

And his singular exclamation as he saw the only person he loved. That single word perfectly portrays everything Kelly is for him. So touching... succinct yet amazingly successful in projecting powerful emotions... please excuse me while I get some tissues...

You also portrayed Chakwas very well. From your story, one can immediately see that Chakwas is, shall we say, a true military doctor, putting professionalism and the wellbeing of her patients first.

And ONE MOST IMPORTANT THING: In general, you did a MIGHTY FINE job describing the crew post-rescue. Almost nobody is fit enough to celebrate the destruction of the collector base, which is not surprising considering what they've been through. Very unlike other fics where the crew is all perky and happy and... um, you know. And also explained why it was Joker standing on the airlock with the rifle, providing cover fire to the last three.

The scene in which Joker consoled Kelly is also so romantic; tender and loving with no inopportune lust.

And such a beautiful closing.

So. All the praises and commendations abound, there's still one thing you can do to make this better: Put a separator between the shower scene and the cargo hold scene. It's to jarring a change there.

-

All in all, mighty fine writing!

All throughout the chapters, your narration truly takes on the characteristic Joker sarcasm, helping the readers to put themselves in his mind.

The build up of romance, tense situations, conflict, suspense, relief... all are written very well and very beautifully.

This story will surely go into my all-time fave list.

Congratulations on a story well-written! I'll surely be looking forward to other well-written stories from you :)

Thanks for portraying Cerberus as actually caring for the needs of Joker. From the comfortable pilot's chair to the retractable benches in the shower. Even if Joker still hates Cerberus, the reader can still grasp that Cerberus cared - in a ruthless way - for its members. At least, that's what I'm getting.

(And let it be noted that I *don't* think Cerberus as evil, per se. Ruthless, yes. But not evil. Maybe, pure renegade, the kind of organization that don't care of the means as long as the ends are achieved ... mmm, sorry for the offtopic rambling. That's the grit of a fanfic I'm writing)

And... sweet lemon! Yay! Rarely can one write a romantic explicit smut without being to vulgar and throwing the romance out of the window, replacing it with pure animalistic lust. But you did it!

And the ending is... um, let's say that there are more than one ME2 player who got traumatized by that specific incident.

Okay, the moment when Joker asked Kelly about Jack using the men's room is hilarious :D

As also when Kelly instructed him to get naked... LOL xD

And Kelly's interrupted speech... and paybak... ROFL xD

But the ending is so... shocking. Well-written, but shocking.

I think I have to sue you for an emotional whiplash... :P

I'm a bit confused. On the 3rd chapter it is implied that the Normandy is docked at the Citadel. But at the end, Joker asked EDI to start cruising. They leaving the good doctor behind? :P

And even with Joker considering using Shepard's quarters... um why the sudden jump to "fantasizing about the commander"?

But the closing interaction with EDI is hilarious, as Joker cut her too-complete explanation of Shepard's whereabouts :D

No misspellings or grammatical mistakes that I can detect here :)

I'll go on to the next chapter ;)

Okay, I've promised you a chapter-by-chapter review, so here goes...

First of all, thank you for paying attention to one of the most underrated character of Mass Effect. Joker's been there in ME1 and ME2, but unlike even other non-LI's, he was rarely given the recognition he so much deserved.

Kelly was so... straightforward here. That's a change. A refreshing change, but still shocking nonetheless.

And you got Joker down pat.

No criticism - except for those i and /i pairs.

And I agree with your summary: The erotica is well-written. Elegant without being in-your-face vulgar.

awww this was so cute! Joker deserves a little love after all he's been through. Great job.

good story with a great ending :)

Beautiful. I loved the way you pulled Jeff out of his shell. Kelly's thoughts and dialog did a wonderful job of showing how much she came to care for Jeff as a person. In this relationship Joker's condition was a challenge rather than a fault.

It is a lovely piece. I hope you are proud of it.

This was quite a good story. Well written, with a relatively realistic portrayal of the characters' personalities and perspectives. Also a relatively realistic portrayal of romance, in my honest opinion. I can obviously say I have no complaints, though I would point out that the BBcode for italics didn't go so well. Looking forward to other works of yours.

absolutely smexy story. I was worried at the beginning that your only objective would be smut (gets tedious after a while), but you thoroughly provesd that wrong with the tender development of their relationship and Joker's slow opening up to Kelly.

And Oh! Cudo's for the shower scene! OMG that was the best scene I've ever read! SWEET!

I agree. This needs more reviews. I think people are focused on other characters. I, for one, found this story to be very well written and played out. Not to mention the "therapy" in the first chapter was just... Really, I mean just... Hehehe. The other times were hot too, but something about "mouth hugging" (Not my term!) a pilot in his seat was really hot. :: Snickers and runs off::