i just finished rereading this, and, let me tell you, this is such an amazing story. the first time i was reading it, i was suspicious of everyone, thinking they had some sort of ulterior motives, so this time it was actually much more enjoyable. the way you portrayed everything from ed’s point of view was so fittingespecially him not understanding why people feel sorry for him. and the ending. colonel mustang, their conversation, edward signing the documentit’s just all so well-written. thank you for giving me an opportunity to read this story, it was such an amazing experience!

Reread this fic for the first time in a while, and it's as good as it was the first time. Thanks a lot for sharing it with us, I'm sure it's brightened a lot of people's days. :D (I had to leave this review on this chapter because I already reviewed the final chapter, oops. Riza in this chapter is really sweet, by the way.)

I was recommended this story by my sister (both of us are huge FMA fans) and can I just say how much I’m loving this so far?

I just finished Chapter 1 and laughed my butt off! The grubby kid with the oral fixation, the old lady whining about her prize hydrangeas, Mustang’s passive digs on poor Ed, etc.—the whole thing feels a lot like the light novels to me! Particularly Land of Sand and Valley of White Petals. And I mean this in a good way! Both of those novels were a delight to read and I loved them!

I know you finished this almost a decade ago, but this first chapter has already checked off all my boxes on the types of fanfic I love for this franchise! I’ll definitely continue to Chapter Two and plan to review more!

Great job!

Excellent story! I love how you gave the town so much personality, and I really enjoyed the OCs. This honestly felt like a multi-episode arc of the original story to me, so great job on keeping everyone in character (including the setting)!

Amé esta historia con toda mi alma
¡Me encantó!

These are the moments that completely wrecked me as I was reading it. Really powerful stuff. It takes a good writer to completely devastate his/her reader through just simple words.

Chapter 11:

For a moment Ed was frightened of Al, frightened of his brother, of the shape that Ed had chosen for him in a moment of pain and desperation, the tower of armor leaning over him.

"But Brother, you have your arm back," Al told him.

Ed looked down at the mass of wires and steel lying on the sheet next to him. It seemed alien, a piece of machinery, not an arm. Ed wondered if he looked as lost and confused as he felt.

"Please, Al, can I have my arm back?"

Al was silent for a moment, and then his shoulders sank. The hope in his voice turned to despair, "Just rest, Ed. We'll get your arm back."

"Thanks, Al."

-
Chapter 16:

"Why are we talking about this?" Ed hissed. "Nothing is going to happen! I'm not going to die! I'm not going to leave my brother!"

"Your mother died. I'm sure that was the last thing that she intended, to leave you boys on your own."

Ed's chest physically ached as if the colonel punched him.

"You bastard," Ed said, low and dangerous, gripping the back of the chair he'd been sitting on so hard that the knuckles on his left hand turned white. He tipped his head forward so that his bangs would mask the tears that were forming in his eyes, but the thickness of his voice betrayed him anyway. "Why are you doing this to me?"

Wow.

This is one of the, if not, the single best characterization of Edward Elric that I have ever read and laid eyes on in all my years of reading Fullmetal Alchemist fanfiction in domains like this and Archive Of Our Own.

The way you write Ed is sublime. I honestly believe that the dialogue and reactions that were shown by Ed during the duration of this story were what we would have actually done if he was written by Arakawa. The Ed here seemed as though he was taken straight out of the manga. You nailed his stubborn determination and youthful cockiness that toes the line between arrogance and the painful way of needing to prove himself for some inexplicable reason. You got his brash, spitfire personality down pat without resorting to F-bombs like others do, and you even nailed the subtle self-depreciating way that he treats himself, especially around Al.

Edward (and Alphonse by extension) is a character who seems to thrive on quiet tragedy and you captured that perfectly. I can't get over reading this, and thank you for the ending. The only other story that almost rivals this in terms of Elric characterization is the demon alchemist series by metisket in Ao3 and Bookworm389's stories that he/she unfortunately deleted in this website (although she posted some of her FMA fics again in Ao3 last year, as I stumbled upon one of his/her fics there).

I could go on and on but I'll just say that a decade later from posting this and you'll still have readers giving you reviews because this story was just so well-written. Simple but intricate, and just sublime. If you ever get around to writing more FMA stories other than this one, then I'll give you my support all the way. Thank you for writing this.

Oh my Gooooood! This was so amazing I litterally couldn't put it down! I ended up staying up the entire night and well into the day just reading this brilliantly written piece. It was so worth the sleep deprivation. Your writing style, I love it! It's so clean, full, direct & concise. All characters, canon and original were written so wonderfully and the grappling themes were just so spot on.

The first few chapters were really amusing to read. Like, it was humourous in that sympathetic kind of way, where you laugh but still feel bad for the main character because even the little things seem to be going wrong for them and they just can't seem to catch a break (That whole thing with Ed getting breifly intoxicated took me by suprise. Is the "spirits used as a healing remedy" really a countryside sort of thing? What a peculiar detail. That scene was pretty tense until I realized. The releif and laughter just flooded through me right after). As it got more serious I really did start to feel really sad for Ed, and it suprised me when Mason voiced my exact thoughts immedietly after during one of their confrontations. I'm honestly in awe at how skillfully and deeply you explored Ed's Character flaws without directly explaining it. I mean it. The entire story was such a wild ride, seeing him fueled by his stubborn arrogance to the point of breaking.

There were times I thought he was really in the wrong (and then suprised me when I realized he was also right lol. The scene where he let's Leon go for example. Awsome display of Ed's humanity shining through his steely convictions). Like he was being so unreasonably stupid! (Ironic, since I actually think you tied his personal reasoning into his actions so well. I don't always see characters written in a way where driving themselves ragged and near the brink of death even when it's beyond reason holds any real weight or logical sense, at least in the mind of that character). And darn it, for all the moronic things Ed said or did... you also made him so damn likable and easy to sympathize with. Sympathize and want to slap silly in order to drill some sense into him haha. Like, seeing how his actions were affecting Al broke my heart. I was totally with him 100% (I loved how you wrote their relationship, albeit in a really strangled scenario. The way Al would get frustrated or directly point out Ed's ridiculousness, and the two would end up bickering or apolagizing felt brotherly and what it's like to have siblings). A lot of the conflict that he created from being unessesarily mean, believing the worst in people, or frustratingly just trying to be self-reliant when it was painfully clear that he he needed to let people help him that actually made it so self-inflicting and so self-loathing... like good lord, for lack of a better word or phrase, everything about Ed trying so hard while seeing the world with such hard eyes and hurting himself when he didn't have to just HURT MY HEART A LOT.

But it was brilliant. So freakin' brilliant. How you wrote these characters with such contradicting and intermingling qualities in the ways that they acted, conflicted or related with eachother... There were so many moments I found amazing. Ed's talk with Mason. Ed letting Leon go. His talk with the Drachman doctor (ch 13 left me stunned in some moments). His follow up with Mustang (loved how you didn't let it get mushy but still managed to convey the trust and bond of their relationship. The sincerity in Mustang's words and Ed's body language in reaction to that I think fit perfectly with their character)

This was a beautiful story, I'm so glad I read you for sharing your incredibly talent. Reading and observing how you carefully and meticulously wrote this story is inspiring and I hope to be able to read it again in the future :)

I adore this story and hope to read it many more times

ha! I love it. The funny thing is that the entire time I was reading this story I was sick and I kept coughing when Edward coughed. Every one around me thought I was crazy because I would cough then laugh at the fact that I coughed and then start coughing again.

SOOOOOO GOOOOOOOD HNNNNNGGGG

I love the original characters that you have incorporated into your story, because they do so well in helping Ed learn how to gain trust in others. The plot and the pacing of this story are incredible, and your descriptive writing skills are like icing to the cake. I enjoyed reading this 100%, and I can say that it is probably most definitely my favorite fma fanfiction. You, my friend, have a keen taste for angst, something that truly brought your story to life.

I really enjoyed reading this for sharing it!

Lovely story! Sick fanfics are always full of angst and fluff I loved it!

I totally agree with goraturtle. This story is so well written than I could effortlessly see it in my mind as if I was watching the anime.
Some of Ed's dialogue seems too mature even for him, but I do think it's possible he thinks that way and is capable of talking that eloquently if he wants to.

I'd love a second story, one where they get the need to use that paper. I love parental RoyEd but most stories out there lack the canon characterization you obviously havr in yours. That's why I think a similar story from your pen where Roy is more involved would be awesome.

Thanks for this great fic. Hope to resd you again soon.

Amber.