Captured Jack very well! He definitely would not stop at anything (maybe unless he knows he's upsetting someone though, of course) to get answers when he's curious about something. I mean in the movie when Jack is experimenting with all the Christmas thingamabobs that is shown! So, great job with him in this! As well as everyone's favourite, worrisome yet adorable ragdool Sally!

Improving your writing? The only way I can see you having to improve, is you doing even more of it! You're awesome!

It was a cute little idea. I think Sally could have been a bit more frightened (maybe jump into Jack's arms to hide from it or something); she seemed pretty calm for never experiencing a thunderstorm. I'm not criticizing your work, you're very good,it was just my opinion. It was a fluffy story and I enjoyed it. Hope to read more.

So flufffyyyyyyyyy! *squeels* Sally's funny when she's snappy... though you reversed the order of thunder and lightning, light travels faster then sound. it also doesn't make sence that the lighting only striks once, it would've been funny if jack still didn't get is and then lightning struk, making sally skream and grab onto jack... though thats just my personal opinion.

*claps* DUDE! I so LOVE these stories you have about JAck and SAlly! WAY CUTE!

OH! *raises hand* Do you take suggestions?

Aww Jack's soo ssweet. I love this story.

how sweet

Awww, more JackxSally fluff! Great story!

Please please please please please please write more? Thanks! Princess... xxxx

No, u dont need to improve, everyone has their own style of writing and i really like this story, its really cute in a halloweenish way. Keep up the good work!

Very nice! You're a good writer.

I did spot one flaw though. Lightning comes before thunder. That's because the speed of light is faster than the speed of sound.

Anyway, awesome and sweet story. Always looking forward to more.