And so it ends with the immortal word "Neaarrowwoom." I cant think of a more fitting way to end a story.

Hahahahaha wonserful

Whew. I finally came back to this after a few years, mainly having lost track of it while waiting for the story to build sufficient material. So, sorry for the late review.

As with my prior review, I'm horribly conflicted. On on hand you are an excellent technical writer. The level of detail you bring to the table should be the standard by which fanfiction is judged. On the other, it's one of this fic's biggest weaknesses, bringing so much narrative to the table that it drags it down in many places.

In terms of plot and aside from the above issues, it's thrilling. There are times Ranma doesn't get a saving throw, something you don't see happen all too often in fanfiction. The torture/behavior modification sections were the hardest for me to work through, causing my stomach to churn at times. I teetered on the edge of fic!quit, but soldiered through. I think the ability to create such a mixture of emotions is the mark of a good plot, though that is a double-edged sword itself.

The battle sequence toward the end was exceptional, though I would be remiss in mentioning how Ranma's canon is all but gutted shorted of a handful of key characters. Beyond them, Nerima simply didn't exist.

Okay, so the gripes are out of the way. I'm still jealous of your ability to flesh out a coherant, sensible magic system and the myraid of other details that went into the plots creation. As I said, excellent job.

was a good story over all the midfuck/rape chapters kinda dragged on too long and seriously was looking forward to seeing the government officials put in their place killed or enslaved for their crimes but otherwise a good story

so wait what happened to all those government officials taking underage kidnapped little girls as sexual bribes? why the hell did ranma not just enslave them with his magic cause i think they deserve either that or death and it would give him better footing within the government to make them loyal to him and its a strange thing to ignore in an epilogue after including it in your story a few times before hand i mean how many of those girls are still out there being raped

honestly seems more like horror/tragedy than an adventure/drama even if its well written there seems to be way too much mindfuck going on that's largely a whole lot of nothing but the same thing over and over

A good story overall, even if I don't 100% approve of how Ranma developed. But there were no issues in how it was done, so yeah good job.

My only criticism is that it dragged on too long. Chapter 12 in particular.

Yeah no. I mentioned this in the last chapter review but while the rest of this story has been great, this aftermath section seems kind of stupid.
Why does ranma have an obligation to the institute? She should be destroying it.
Why does she care about the prime minister or the diet? They were complicit in artemis's crimes and have no real power to effect anything she does since she has an effective monopoly on magic, strength and mind control.
Why is ranma accepting people as 'military assets' when she should be freeing them, and why on earth is she allowing one of the other girls to continue to brainwash her? If she's allowing her mind and judgement to be compromised like that then what was even the point of taking over?

No, dismantle the institute, drag all the politicians through the mud, free all the girls and find a way to erase any databases with their id's in it. Use the position and authority of director as a tool in that dismantlement, not as a real duty that actually needs to be fulfilled.

The world is better off without the pretty princess institute, and the fact that that even needs to be said is kind of shocking.

Not really sure what the big deal is about becoming director. Just free everyone to the best of your ability then shut the place down. If the politicians complain then beat the shit out of them and reveal that they accepted sex slaves in exchange for covering up artemis's crimes. Then get on with your life.
Looks like a real simple solution to me.
Accepting any further alterations is obviously stupid and should not be done.

Should have just killed them all and rid the world of these monsters.

Should have just exterminated them, they deserve no less

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-2 and 6
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how the hell is this a Ranma story this has way too much angst not enough humor in it to really be considered a ramna story

There aren't a lot of stories, no matter the source or media, that inspire me to come back and re-read them immediately. Some are old favorites, that I return to again and again, but rare is the the tale that inspires me to come back immediately.

Maybe it's the triumph through adversity. Maybe it's a very self-contained ZOMGRANMACHAN fic that overflows with consistency and verisimilitude. Maybe it's the battered but unbroken Earn Your Happy Ending — something in which I believe strongly. Nothing worthwhile is easy, and everything has a cost, in time, money, and effort. While definitely dark, this isn't a darkfic to me, by virtue of said happy ending, and while there is definitely mind fuckery, it doesn't smack of either identity death or unearned personality warping, which is an important justification. This is a very believable Ranma who got in over his head, and emerged changed through her own will.

This has been an impressive, great read, and thank you for sharing.

Very promising

This chapter and other are a bit rough around the edges.

A shame the author can't be bothered to use the corrections other reviewers have pointed out, it's just a matter of exporting to the doc manager, with CTRLF finding and correcting the sentences, and then saving the chapter.

I'm writing this in the hope that the author will care enough about future readers to do that little bit of editing at some point.