You don’t need to rewrite this. It’s amazing and exquisite just the way it is. I adore Neji’s fierce unrequited love for Hinata and Sasuke’s fiery obsession. This is absolute perfection. Please update soon!

I enjoyed this and I am sad to see it end on such a cliffhanger.

Is she one of his servants?

I like this

Cool based on a greek myth

I apologise if I didn't review the other chapters...I was to busy indulging myself in the imagery of the play out of the story in my imagination. Reason that I came to adore this fanfic is simply because of the atmosphere it produce and blah blah blah...its a frikken awesome fanfic need I say more? Honestly now...Why would you want to rewrite it? Like...now like the fanfic wouldn't continue and we must wait...*tears* :\ and they were just about to meet again and I was so totally fangirling...but at last its your wish, do whatever that pleases you...I shall be we waiting
ps. Love how you adapt the characters to the story and how changed their history in the canon a bid _

glad u r back, please continue the story

Yay your back, so excited for the next chapter :) please update :)

Argh! Please I pray and hope you do update soon.

Why is it that all the good stories get dropped

Well hopefully one day soon

Haha, I know exactly what you mean by loving reviews. I myself can't get enough of 'em XD

Now, down to business:

AAHHH! Please continue this! I loved it so far and I'm sure I'll love any where this story goes. If you're looking for inspiration, I'd suggest reading some Hades and Persephone fics here on . They've got plenty of ideas for first meetings, the first few days, how everyone feels about the kidnapping, etc. Also, Phantom of the Opera fanfics deal with a lot of kidnapping, those might be useful too. :)

Please keep up the good work, I'll be waiting patiently! :)

Although I don't see a reason for a complete rewrite, I do hope it's coming along - I want to know what happens next!

I find both the story premises and your writing delightful. It's perhaps not the most original idea, as Hinata has embodied Persephone a number of times, but that is hardly a concern - I never did see why some put originality above quality. Your English is excellent and the faults that remain are usually normal "slip-ups", such as:

"Didn't I tell everyone not to find me unless he awakened?" he hissed. (Chapter 14) - You mean 's'he here.

These mistakes are not common - rest assured - but it might be good to get some outside help from a beta or a knowledgeable peer. It can be difficult to proofread your own text; in the end you might stare at a mistake and not recognise it as such, simply because you're so used to your own text or it's autocorrected in your head. A beta is not a requirement (none of my suggestions ever are), as your English is very good, but it never hurts to reach for perfection ;)

Also, sometimes you tend to focus on Hinata's fragility to a point where the rest of her persona is overshadowed. In every chapter, there are several descriptions of her beautiful features and "thin", "fragile", "weak" (etc.) body. While I do commend you for your use of synonyms, it does tend to get a bit redundant.
I can see that it's a big part of who Hinata is and how it has shaped her life, but once a chapter is enough ;)

You might also reconsider some of your word choices, but this is more nitpicking from my side and a matter of personal preference. If you're usure, you can always google it or discuss it with someone - you might find a more fitting one that way.

Anyway - now that my rant is over - good luck with the rewrite and don't keep us waiting too long :)

please leave this version up. it's really good.

I think you should state that you've put up the new story and leave this story up.