Honestly, the first time I tried to read your stuff, after seeing it recommended on TVTropes, I made the "mistake" of starting with this one, as it was the first chronologically. Seeing all the characters blatantly lifted from TV shows left kind of a bleh taste in my mouth, and I didn't go any further.

Well, I finally gave it another chance, this time starting off with the original and I have to say, it made this one a bit more palatable, as I realized it was a fun little exception, and not the rule, at least as far as the main story went.

This is a cute little story, and I still kinda wish you'd been a bit less... blatant with your characters, but all in all, it was a fun read.

Harbinger: How did Sovereign lose to this rudimentary creature of blood and fresh. *mechanical sigh*. Really should have sent someone else on Vanguard duty

Lets face it, this is the type of Shepard who loses every squad member. Including Joker

I must assume his full name is Belkar Shepard. Nice OOTS reference by the way!

Huh. So this what Mass Effect would be like if Shepard was replaced by Archer. It is hilarious, and I could not stop laughing. On a storytelling perspective, I prefer your original version of Shepard; he doesn't make me want to punch him. Thank you for the hilarity!

I couldn't help it; I voiced all of this chapter's Shepard dialogue in my best impression of H. Jon Benjamin voicing Sterling Mallory Archer.

Yeah.

You heard right.

This Commander Shepard was a bona-fide ARCHER (TM), and I loved every word of it.

and here I was certain this was some kind of prank played on Liara and her documentary
maybe Joker and Garrus teaming up to make up a crazy story with a more cerberus-like Shep and then put it into Liara's inbox

I thought you were serious, since I never read this story before.

You write good.

Very good.

Awesome chapter, as an aprils fool XD

I laughed out loud for several minutes at the disco part. Nice job.

Very good beginning. Gives off kind of a Ciaphas Cain vibe, where through sheer self preservation, charisma, intelligence, and an ungodly amount of luck Shepard becomes the hero of the Impiri-Galaxy... looking forward to the rest.

You should really continue this. I have fun reading this again. Maybe because the fandom always emphasize on Shepard's badassery and not enough on parts of his personality that to me this feels like a breath of fresh air. I certainly want more of this sarcastic, fun and mischievous Shepard.

That was all kinds of perfect.

Reading a lighter Shepard is, as always, a pleasure. Many stories are so heavy, angsty ... and many of those are well written. This is refreshing.

Now, criticism.

SpaG, excellent. Plot, short, and to the point. Good. Realism ... a little stretchy ... but workable. By that, I mean that it's a little hard to believe a single soldier would be pointed out so much. I know it's ME canon, but it's hard to believe even there. As a counter example, the Alamo in American history had 200 defenders against 10,000 (if I remember correctly). There are three famous individuals for that one, Davy Crockett, James Bowie and William Travis.

Of course, that may be a bad example; this is roughly 150 years after the event, and there have been two major movies (Disney's Davy Crockett in 1955 and John Wayne's "The Alamo" in 1960). Still ... no other heroes or notable combatants? You'd think local politics would be rampant with would-be heroes.

Still, that's just my opinion. Like a pretzel, it's best to be taken with a grain of salt.

Keep up the good work!

This chapter is a great reflection on how Shepard's life is changing and his pranks are too. Unlike previous episodes where they were visited on utterly repugnant individuals, Lori is more annoying than evil. This time it's less about a victim personally deserving it and more about Shep’s need to exert SOME control SOMEWHERE. It’s fitting that he would turn to a part of his psyche that’s served as a pressure valve before: the prankster.

And while this is still a light tale, I have to highlight "I wished I could see myself through their eyes and understand what they saw in Charles Irving Shepard..." deftly opening parentheses that will be closed far down the line at the end of THWLM when Miranda metaphorically grabs him by the shoulders, shakes him really hard and tells him what she sees, it's truly one of the great character moments of the series.

But that's far in the future. Today we laugh, and he's off to shore leave with Ellie. A pleasure seeing her again.