"Right come in out of the damp." Sorry do you mean cold? Damp just sounds so wrong and no one would ever say that?

Really looking forward to reading more. please update again soon!

I LOVE THAT YOU INCLUDED THE HAMISH JOKE HAHAHAHAHA

give her a break skskkss

Amazing story love it so far...
Please check a blog of my friends mazarine reyna ... she loves your story and was the one to recommend this story... so as a return gift for on giving me such a wonderful syory please check out her blog mazarine reyna

Amazing story please check out the blog of mazarine reyna

Check out Mazarine reyna

dude my cats name is nyx I feel awesome

Go Mrs. Hudson!

I've completely fallen in love with Amber and Sherlock. I can't wait to get started on the next part.

I really love this story, I wish I didn't have to go to work!

I think the way you have characters communicate is a bit unnatural and strange and when writing dialogue it important to keep in mind to communicate and not narrate which is what I believe your doing. Nobody actually talks like this.

She's too much of a Mary Sue. Not to mention her past and all the death in her family is way too tragic. This is supposed to be a mystery and suspenseful and exciting but it spokes of as choppy, probably due to lack of proper paragraphing and punctuation. There is no way someone with that much of a tragic past would be this well adjusted. She would be in p a complete wreak and not functioning normally like she is doing, unless, like Sherlock, she is too a sociopath. She lost her parents, brother, exhusband, a baby and two sisters! Trust me no human being can go throughout life normally. She would be severely traumatized by her death and would doubtfully be working as a forensic photographer. On the subject of her career, I am advising you to do just a bit more research into what her job actually entails since now she is portrayed rather flat and two dimensional. Also she has said that she has a passion for forensics and photography but you don't follow up on that passion but instead let it hang like a dead fish.

I've also discovered several instances which are rather strange and make no sense. the entire reason she moved to Baker St. was because she was scared and wanted Sherlocks help and then she gets mad at him for invading her privacy when she was the one who intially disrupted Sherlocks life. She has several instances where she tells him to back off and mind his own business although with her moving in she had become his business and especially after asking for help is she presence pertinent to both him and John. Although the the most inconsistent aspect is her mental health and complete lack of interest and emotional response to her stalker and her families death. She works for the police and yet does it tell them she has a stalker. That is a rare and very stupid thing to do especially for some one working within law enforcement.

Importantly is of course the portrayal of cops and Scotland Yard. They are all made out to be idiots as is the death of nearly her entire family isn't conspicuous. The police would defiantly put it together and be able to to something. This man or woman sounds not only like a stalker but a sadist and a serial killer with an obsessive disorder. Stalkers don't work in the way you have portrayed them. They are attempt to isolate people from everything and everyone and eventually make their move. The packages and pictures and notes are pretty weak for a stalker this obsessed. It's also something straight out of a late night run of the mill cop show. You aren't using this amazing storyline you have created to your advantage and instead let it play out normally and weakly which is actually quite boring. It would be much more effective if you put a bit of emotion into your character instead of having her just flounce around like a Marionette. She needs to be more three dimensional and interesting because to me it seems as if she has no purpose outside being a victim. Her character establishment and development needs a serious overhaul and renewal and you need to think about who she is and her life and her choices instead of making her do everything and be an incredibly vague choppy character.

These are only my opinions and shouldn't be taken as gospel. I do however know my way around serious books and serious writing. I also am very picky with my reading material since is needs to be on a certain plateau and have near no spelling mistakes and be a good story. Rarely do I find OC stories which are good but yours has potential if you work more one it and give it an overhaul! Love and Regards, S

Omg

She's too much of a Mary Sue. Not to mention her past and all the death in her family is way too tragic. This is supposed to be a mystery and suspenseful and exciting but it spokes of as choppy, probably due to lack of proper paragraphing and punctuation. There is no way someone with that much of a tragic past would be this well adjusted. She would be in p a complete wreak and not functioning normally like she is doing, unless, like Sherlock, she is too a sociopath. She lost her parents, brother, exhusband, a baby and two sisters! Trust me no human being can go throughout life normally. She would be severely traumatized by her death and would doubtfully be working as a forensic photographer. On the subject of her career, I am advising you to do just a bit more research into what her job actually entails since now she is portrayed rather flat and two dimensional. Also she has said that she has a passion for forensics and photography but you don't follow up on that passion but instead let it hang like a dead fish.

I've also discovered several instances which are rather strange and make no sense. the entire reason she moved to Baker St. was because she was scared and wanted Sherlocks help and then she gets mad at him for invading her privacy when she was the one who intially disrupted Sherlocks life. She has several instances where she tells him to back off and mind his own business although with her moving in she had become his business and especially after asking for help is she presence pertinent to both him and John. Although the the most inconsistent aspect is her mental health and complete lack of interest and emotional response to her stalker and her families death. She works for the police and yet does it tell them she has a stalker. That is a rare and very stupid thing to do especially for some one working within law enforcement.

Importantly is of course the portrayal of cops and Scotland Yard. They are all made out to be idiots as is the death of nearly her entire family isn't conspicuous. The police would defiantly put it together and be able to to something. This man or woman sounds not only like a stalker but a sadist and a serial killer with an obsessive disorder. Stalkers don't work in the way you have portrayed them. They are attempt to isolate people from everything and everyone and eventually make their move. The packages and pictures and notes are pretty weak for a stalker this obsessed. It's also something straight out of a late night run of the mill cop show. You aren't using this amazing storyline you have created to your advantage and instead let it play out normally and weakly which is actually quite boring. It would be much more effective if you put a bit of emotion into your character instead of having her just flounce around like a Marionette. She needs to be more three dimensional and interesting because to me it seems as if she has no purpose outside being a victim. Her character establishment and development needs a serious overhaul and renewal and you need to think about who she is and her life and her choices instead of making her do everything and be an incredibly vague choppy character.

These are only my opinions and shouldn't be taken as gospel. I do however know my way around serious books and serious writing. I also am very picky with my reading material since is needs to be on a certain plateau and have near no spelling mistakes and be a good story. Rarely do I find OC stories which are good but yours has potential if you work more one it and give it an overhaul! Love and Regards, X