Kirari:OBJECTION!
Kirori:WE
Kagaya:DEMAND
All three:A SECOND VERSION!
Kirari:Or a little sneak at Raimon...

This is so exciting

Finally , I find the fiction that has Saru as the main character and this is it

peeeeeeerfecr!
simply perfect! love the ending and every other chapter!

It is truly a nice story! I read it with muh pleasure! :)

Uh... I love it! But I don't really quite get it. What about Raimon? Would you please explain the plot to me?

Kiss?! They kissed?!

SWEET!

Really? Is he THAT crazy?

I still like him though.

Gasp! Saru vs Saru!

Please update!

Climax is coming soon!

I can't wait for it!

Another proof that you have involved TenmaxAoixsaru here, right?

This summer I was on a mission to watch all of the Inazuma Eleven and Inazuma Eleven GO episodes, which I completed yesterday. Since I am now up to date with the anime, I had nothing left to do except find fanfiction on it.
From what I've found on this site so far, this fanfic stood out to me! I enjoy the plot of it very much! I am now wondering who this mysterious antagonist is (I have a good idea who it is but I'm not too sure so I hope to be surprised by the big reveal).
I wanted to leave you some tips to help you improve on this fanfic and others if you are going to write more.
First off, describe more. For the last part of this chapter, I was pretty confused. Where were Shirara, Wonderbot, and Aoi? What time did this occur? Was it dark outside or was it light outside? Simple things like this really help make a setting for the story and can help readers like myself get more immersed in the fanfic as they read along. You could also describe in better detail character reactions if you want to. For example, you can explain how Aoi felt after Shirara ran past figured that something bad happened but how was Aoi reacting on the outside? Was Aoi afraid? Did Aoi turn in the direction Shirara ran? You don't have to describe exactly everything that is going on (the readers can figure some of that out themselves) but a bit more of description would seriously improve this.
Second, maybe include a indication of who is the POV centered on at a certain point? I had a big problem with figuring out whose point of view was I reading from. It could be as simple as indicating next to "POV Change" the name of the character. It could also just be your personal writing style, which is helping add to the "mystery" of this story.
Third, I recommend you don't just use the characters' names all the time when you address them. It helps the flow of the story if you don't always say, for example, "Fei" to say that the character doing the action currently is Fei. You could use parts of their physical, personal, or situational description to address them as well. For example, you can write "the stabber" to describe the masked boy or something in that matter if you don't want to address him as "the boy" or "my green-haired friend" to describe Fei. Once again, this could just be your personal writing style so you don't have to do this if you don't want to.
Finally, I recommend you check the file of the chapter on the file editor before submitting it to the story. I have an issue with the fanfiction file uploader where words that were there in the original document would disappear from the fanfiction version of it. I recommend you read it over and edit it on the fanfiction file editor before uploading if you notice a couple of words are missing.
I seriously enjoyed reading this! I hope to see an update of this soon! :) Have a nice day!
-Sam

Oh. So he found out! and why did he shoot Fey!? It's not fairTT_TT Oh well we can't do anything but the others might be able to do something! See ya!

awwwwwww Ten/aoi
NO
focus on Aoi/saru

Wow... just wow...

What a great fic! I don't get why I'm the only one getting this!