Nobody does this as well as you do Tess.

That conversation or confession to Nate was very telling about his inner thoughts and feelings. You wrote it beautifully Tess.

I enjoyed this. If there is a follow up please let me know where I can find. Thank you.

An awesome, emotionally captivating insight of Deeks possible feelings about his position in the team, focusing (but not only) on Siderov case and Kensy and Sam attitudes toward him. I actually found disturbing that the first words Sam said when they have been rescued were not " how do you feel?" but "did you give up Michelle?". I mean, he saw Deeks torured, he heard his denials, his screams and...still doesnt trust him? Loved the adventurous vacation part! Jumping with a parachute is safer than riding a good old Bonny ? :)

I'm really likening these conversation especially the one with Nate and Deeks about the book it made total sense was exactly how i imagined one of there talks going.

Wow. Just. Wow. This is so incredibly original, witty and infinitely more than a formulaic Densi story. You have Deeks down so well and told his story perfectly through circuitous events and conversations. He says so much indirectly and walks a fine line of seeking acceptance and being rebellious. This story reads as though you put the best parts of Deeks in a literary blender and out came this entertaining and introspective tale of a messed up guy shown through fragments of his everyday life. Very, very well done!

This is an interesting cross of genres and styles. Your writing is great, careful, and colorful, but somehow your plan stretches the reader to keep up with the varying timeline, genre, and all the characters.

love loved this!

Thank you for this! Hope to see you back soon!

Loved it! Love the twist at the end too. Great story! Thank you!

You are just such a good writer. This is another excellent Deeks story. You have a gift for capturing his personality. Looking forward to more chapters.

Oh, how I love this. I was thrilled with the ending. Also have to add that I love Matthew in all of your stories with him. Well done.

This is incredible. Amazing. Perfect. I love everything about it. I love Deeks sharing his experiences with Angela. I love him talking about "the leggy brunette." I love that he regrets pushing her away because now he can't really talk to her at all. I love the letters he writes her and how his whole vacation ended up. Well done. I absolutely loved it :)

This is... incredible. Wow. So perfect!

Quick notice: Since you split the last chapter the first part ended on a terrible cliffhangar - terrible perhaps because it wasn't that bad but I really, really wanted to know what happened next - so I skipped the "Review" button part. I hope to make up for it with this review. Back to the story.

This is easily my favorite chapter. Chapter One was good, a lot of things to learn and to digest. Chapter Two was nice and fun but something was missing. Chapter Three started off with so many names I got thoroughly confused until I realized what was going on and from there on it was one hell of a ride.

First of all, I can absolutely picture Nell and Deeks together on a stakeout and while I'd have expected her to ask about his cases I thought she'd be a bit forthcoming concerning her own stories, as well. But she only seemed to want to know about him. EIther way, that was finished quickly. And the scene in the cab? PRICELESS. Not knowing how he had found out all the things he knew was as agonizing for me as it was for Nell, and I love the remarks Deeks and Hetty made about the Major of Obsessiveville (never heard that before, smiled like a crazy woman) later on! Also, the Nell/Eric interaction that was carried along between the lines was very nice and I enjoyed it a lot.

Secondly: Hetty. Or rather, the nicknames Bates had for her. Wow. How do you come up with such things? You really can handle words and language well, it's a pleasure to read your stories. Also, while I did not expect it at all, Hetty being in the hospital to pick Deeks up (she was there earlier, right?) was very much like her. SHe cares about him a lot. I wonder whether that is because Deeks always makes himself inferior when he compares himself to his colleagues? Sam is former Seal, Callen is a genius free agent with incredible intelligence and skills, Kensi a marine daughter (was Sheryl supposed to remind Deeks of her? Because she reminded me), a skilled sniper and more and Nell and Eric the intelligence analyst whizzes with highest IQs. But Deeks is only Deeks - at least, when he looks at himself - and I have the hunch that he does not see how special he is, sometimes. Or, even when he knows it, he feels like it does not measure up to the rest of the teams' abilities, so he always sees himself as less important and expendable. I'm sure Hetty, if she feels the same as I do about that, makes sure she spends a bit more time on worrying about Deeks and caring for him because he is special, too. (Did that not make sense? It's hard to explain.) But I have started to love her a lot, even more than I did before your fic, and I'm glad she's there. The tribe will be fine :) Moreover, the latter parts of the chapters, where Hetty reads and sees about Deeks' deekscursions, are some of the best parts of your story. The last few sentences were just like her and I'm sure she'll have a few nice tricks up her sleeve when it comes to it.
(For the first time I understood the passwort hint Deeks left for Hetty. Wow. Now I feel stupid)

A nice touch, too: Deeks opening a company to rent out his bikes (and possible four-wheeled additions).

Angela. What an amazing character, and an amazing woman. From the start to the end I liked her, especially when she and Deeks were snarking at each other, but also because she was weak, she was strong, she couldn't see a future, she wanted to go on, she feared her loved ones seeing her like that and she wanted them to visit and she wanted to talk and to never tell anyone and never feel the pity directed towards her. I will join Deeks and Marco when they go hunting for her torturers, and I will watch when they have found them. I think the hand sanitizer will look nice after they are finished with the abductors. Oh, Marco was an intriguing character, too. You always manage to surprise me, and then make me laugh: the first was the blow at Deeks - hadn't expected that, either - and the second the way the soap dispenser seemed to come up again and again in the best way possible. That was one comic element well used. And the way they talk about Kensi? Wow. Little was said but so much could be heard. I guess for Deeks, it's good to hear a woman's opinion on the status of Kensi and his "thing". :)

So that was the surprise you mentioned? I was wondering. I couldn't see Kensi fitting into the flow of the story but of course she could be included in the end, a few months into the future. You included her splendidly: everything fit. Though of course, now I and all the other readers want to know how you imagine them meeting again after Afghanistan. But you'll leave that up to the series authors, right? :) Or maybe not? So great you included Angela and family in the last paragraph! I'm so happy for them. They deserve the best, too. As do Kensi and Deeks.

Ummm. Will stop writing here. I apologize for flooding you with words. Thank you very, very much for a beautiful story, a wonderful read, amazing characters, for fun, laughs, depressing thoughts, friends, enemies, colleagues, mother-figures and long-legged brunettes. And for dogs. For a story about life: real and full of emotions. Thanks for sharing this.

Pan to leggy brunette laughing at tall, blond and muscle-y man telling his story. Priceless : )
That was a wonderfully perceptive journey through Deek's psyche about the torture, the process and coming out whole in the end. Great story. Well done!