To Be Good

Disclaimer: Characters and premise are the property of Kazue Kato. I'm just borrowing them for a little non-profit angst.

Notes: After Father Fujimoto's death, Yukio went quietly crazy, no one noticed.

AU based on the Anime but I've started reading the Manga, and love it even more than the show so elements from the Manga may creep in. However there's no puppet guy/Takara since the Anime never got around to doing anything with him. No Shura because having a plant in the class with the experience, expertise and inclination to question Yukio would complicate things too much. Similarly Ukobach is out.

Chapter One: Don't Touch Me

"So this is a prison?" Rin asked looking around the dorm with new eyes.

"And I'm your jailor," Yukio said. He sighed. "Rin, I'm sorry about earlier, about how I said things, but you have to realize this is my first teaching position and some of my students are actually older than I am."

"I'm older than you," Rin pointed out.

"We're twins, older and younger is hardly more than a technicality between us. And it's painfully apparent that I'm more mature than you are regardless of that technicality," Yukio stated. "I am your teacher; I can't be your teacher and your brother at the same time. I can't maintain discipline in my class if you won't behave as my student, not my older brother. You can't interrupt my class with personal issues between us again. I realize you needed those answers; that we needed to discuss things; but that wasn't the time or place."

Rin bit his lip and glanced at the floor, "Yeah, I get it. Sorry for causing a scene."

Yukio nodded, accepting Rin's apology. "The middle of a massive Coal Tar attack wasn't how I wanted to have that conversation; it wasn't conducive to open communication."

"Everybody not telling me about, ya know, me being a demon, isn't 'conducive to open communication'," Rin pointed out. "Not to mention, you could have said you were some sort of Exorcist prodigy before turning up as my teacher."

"Well, yes." Yukio admitted. "I suppose I was procrastinating. It wasn't really something I wanted to talk to you about. This is hard for me Rin, you are my twin and I love you but you are responsible for Father Fujimoto's death." Yukio held up his hand before Rin could protest. "I know you didn't kill him, and I am sorry for phrasing it that way before. But you must know that he wouldn't have died if he hadn't needed to protect you."

"I know!" Rin protested angrily. "I told you, I want to become an Exorcist so no one else'll get hurt 'cause of me."

"Yes, I suppose you did," Yukio replied calmly. "But it is import that you remember why you're here, you can't slack off in your classes here the way you used to." He sighed, "You've always been such a terrible student, Rin. And until you fix that, you are a danger to everyone around you, that's why I have to take Father's place and become your new protector. I protect you from Satan and I protect the world from you, that's why we have to share a room."

"The second part, that's just for show right?" Rin asked. "You know I'd never hurt anyone, don't you?"

"Of course," Yukio said without conviction, looking away from Rin.

Rin reached out to put a hand on Yukio's shoulder, "And the last thing I'd want-"

Yukio slapped Rin's hand away. "Don't touch me!" he exclaimed. Rin drew back, shocked and hurt.

Over the next few days Rin tried to respect that Yukio was still upset and blaming him for Father Fujimoto's death. He tried to give Yukio space and especially to keep his distance physically. Everytime Rin forgot and reached out for Yukio like he would have before his demon powers awoke, Yukio flinched as if Rin's touch burned.

It didn't take long before Rin learned not to reach out. WIthout really thinking about it he started keeping his distance from the other students in his classes as well. When his own twin rejected him Rin couldn't expect more from anyone else.

About two weeks after starting school at the True Cross Academy Rin was staring out the window daydreaming while his history teacher droned on. In his mind's eye Rin saw the long table at the monastery.

Several of the monks were laying out plates while Shiro and Yukio helped Rin bring food out from the kitchen.

"Smells great Ni-san," Yukio said.

Shiro ruffled Rin's hair. "See what a little effort and perseverance can accomplish?" He asked. "I remember not so long ago you were burning water, but look at you now."

Rin grinned and ducked his head to hide the blush staining his cheeks. "Don't go getting sappy on me, Old Man."

Rin felt his eyes watering and bit his lip. It was stupid getting all weepy over how dinner used to be; sitting shoulder to shoulder with everyone, fingers brushing casually as dishes were passed, friendly smiles, warm pats on the back…

After the bell rang Rin rushed up the stairs to Yukio's classroom. "I wanna cook dinner tonight," he declared. "Like I used to."

Yukio considered him for a moment. "I suppose it would help with finances if you cooked occasionally. Actually, if you wanted to prepare bentos for our lunches that would help more."

Rin's forehead scrunched up in a frown. "I guess," he said thinking that giving Yukio a meal to take away with him wasn't what Rin missed. Then he smiled. "I could do both. If I plan a little it wouldn't be like cooking two meals at all. Do you have money for groceries?"

"Don't skip your last class," Yukio ordered sternly as he fished out his wallet.

"Yeah, yeah," Rin replied absently.

Rin smiled to himself as he cooked, he had so many good memories associated with the activity. He chopped vegetables with smooth economic strokes, pausing every now and then to stir or add things to the pots and pans on the burner. In the kitchen, if nowhere else, things just seemed to come together under Rin's hands. He'd long since learned to multitask cooking, knew when to start each dish, when they needed his utmost attention and when he could let them simmer away while his focus was on another pan. He knew exactly what was needed and when to have all the ingredients and dishes come together to become a meal even while he was also putting aside things that would become the next day's bentos with a minimum of further preparation.

Rin sighed with satisfaction as he step back and surveyed the spread he'd laid out. "Yukio! Food's on!' Rin called.

Yukio came down stairs, served himself and retreated back to his room. Rin scowled and went after Yukio. He found his twin arranging things so he could grade papers while he ate.

"Sit and eat with me at the table," he ordered grabbing Yukio's shoulder. "Shiro wouldn't…"

Yukio spun around drawing his gun as he moved. He struck Rin harshly across the face with the barrel. Rin fell back, staring up at Yukio in shock as he reached up to touch the blood dripping down his cheek.

"How many times do I have to tell you! Don't touch me!" Yukio snarled glaring down at Rin.

"I- Sorry- Why? What did I do?" Rin stammered, unable to wrap his mind around the fact Yukio had really hit him like that.

"You don't remember? You KILLED Father!" Yukio exclaimed. "And then you went and broke the seal on the sword. You turned yourself into a demon, a filthy disgusting demon." He reached out and twisted Rin's tail viciously to prove his point.

Rin shrieked, his vision practically whiting out from the pain. He pressed himself back against his bed, drawing his limbs in close against further attacks.

Yukio stepped back breathing hard. After a moment he holstered his gun. "I'm sorry," he said stiffly. "I should have better control than that. But constantly having you around, sharing a room with you is difficult now. You're my twin, Father Shiro entrusted you to me, I want to look after you. But at the same time, you are a demon now. Ever since you drew that sword you became everything I've been trained to fight. Every minute I'm with you I sense the evil in you and it makes me want to lash out at you. I sense that you're of Gehenna and subconsciously I want to reject your presence on this plane of existence. Being near you makes me sick."

Rin looked stricken. "I- I didn't know. Is- is there anything I can do?"

Yukio opened his mouth then stopped. He looked away, "No, there's nothing I could ask of you, you're my twin."

"Then there's something," Rin said eagerly. "Whatever it is, I- the last thing I ever want is to drive you away."

"No… well, perhaps if I diluted it I could permit you…" Yukio waffled.

"What?" Rin demanded.

"Holy water," Yukio said. "It would help purify your presence if you rinsed with holy water, but I can't ask you to hurt yourself that way."

"You're not asking, I'm deciding," Rin stated with determination.

Yukio's lips twitched upward. "You won't try anything on your own," he said in a serious tone. "I don't want you endangering yourself."

"Yeah, yeah, let you dilute it or whatever," Rin said eagerly. "Let's do it, now."

Yukio took a holy water grenade out. "No, not this, potency is too high. No, we need to start with a low-class holy water, then we'll dilute from there." As he spoke he led Rin to the dormitory's bathroom.

Yukio filled a basin with water, then after searching a few pockets on his jacket, produced a vial. He studied it thoughtfully for several minutes then carefully added a measure to the basin. "Don't want to use too much. And I'll need to observe the effect on you. I'll be able to feel the purification of your aura, but I need to balance that against the damage you suffer."

Rin peeled off his shirt and reached for a wash cloth. He yelped and flinched back in surprise when his fingers contacted the water. Then he gritted his teeth and plunged his hand into the water and quickly scrubbed himself down. Everywhere the rag touched his skin took on the red hue of a severe sunburn, blisters formed on his hands from prolonged exposure to the holy water. Yukio sat back and watched intently as his brother's demon healing warred against the injuries Rin was inflicting on himself. The glare on his glasses obscured Yukio's eyes as he watched Rin fight to keep the pain he was feeling from showing on his face. "Enough Ni-san," Yukio said went the raw-redness no longer seemed to be fading from Rin's skin.

"Does it feel better? Being around me?" Rin asked hopefully.

Yukio glanced away, "Yes, it's better," he said quickly. "Let me treat you, I have some aloe."

Rin smiled. "Just like old times, you patching me up."

Yukio took his time carefully rubbing the aloe onto Rin's blistered hands, "You can't do this more than once a day," he cautioned. "You have to be at your best for class and missions. It would help most if you purified yourself when we return to the dorm at the end of the day. The effect would be strongest during the evening when we're together and you'd have the whole night to recover."

Rin nodded, "It wasn't that bad even, you could make it stronger," he said. "I mean, you said it was better, not good. And I'll have the whole night to heal, like you said. I heal fast."