Chapter One

I wake to the phrase, "Fear God Alone". Rubbing sleep from my eyes, I push myself onto my elbows and blink at the words painted black against the white walls of my apartment. It serves as a reminder that all fears, besides fear of the Lord, are only faults in our selves, weaknesses. I remember replaying these words over and over in my mind at my choosing ceremony, two years ago today, as my hands shook with apprehension over what I was about to do. Leaving my faction, Abnegation, for Dauntless required a level of bravery I'd only dreamt of. But I did it. I left my father, my father with his cruel mouth and painful hands. In the last ten years, no one, besides me, has transferred from Abnegation to Dauntless. I wouldn't have if I wasn't desperate.

As I head across the Pit to the dining hall for breakfast, feet slap the stone ground behind me. A hand claps my shoulder and I turn to a grinning Zeke.

"Ready to scare the daylights out of the transfers?" he asks.

"You better believe it," I say. "Why else would I have signed up?"

I don't tell him that I actually volunteered to train the transfers because I wanted an excuse to spend more time in the training room.

We enter the dining hall laughing as we fantasize about all the ways we could terrify the transfers, crossing the room to our table in the corner. Shauna and Lauren are already seated. I sit next to Lauren and Zeke faces me from beside Shauna. Shauna sets down her muffin.

"Good morning!" She smiles. I smile back at her. She raises an eyebrow. These days, my smiles are hard to come by.

"You're in a good mood, Four." Lauren nudges me with her elbow. "Excited to train the transfers?"

Am I? All I can think about is the decision I will make after initiation. I don't want to leave behind the friends I've made and I will miss the feel of this place, but I just don't feel like I belong here. Our faction, under the leadership of Max and Eric, has become corrupted by false ideals of bravery.

"I'm excited that my transfers are going to beat out your Dauntless-borns in rankings," I decide.

She rolls her eyes. "In your dreams."

"I wonder who the first jumper will be," says Shauna. Her eyes cloud over.

I nod absentmindedly. The first jumper is almost always a Dauntless-born, though we try to keep the net at the bottom of the cavern a secret. They have a head start on the transfers, who didn't grow up exploring the compound, weren't expected to display attributes of bravery and boldness from a young age. I have voiced my concerns on this issue of fairness, but the current leaders refuse to acknowledge it.

Zeke gasps, his eyes fixed on the line forming in front of the food counter.

"No way. Is that chocolate cake?!" he almost shouts.

In an instant, we are up.

XXXX

The rest of the day passes slowly and uneventfully; the very air seems to be holding its breath. Luckily, since it is Choosing Day, the entire compound is off of work. I spend the remainder of the morning and a majority of the afternoon in the training room, savoring the explosion of power behind my hands as I practice my moves against the punching bag. The moment I set foot in this room for first time during my initiation, I felt an undeniable sense of ease, the sort of feeling that accompanies relief. I knew that if I worked hard, I would never feel vulnerable again. I could defend myself. Against anyone… even my father. This was the first place I ever felt strong.

Sweat and the smell of metal cling to my clothes as I trudge back to my apartment, my body heavy. The transfers, as well as the Dauntless –born initiates, will arrive shortly. The air has finally let out its breath, giving way to an aura of excitement. I dress in a black t-shirt and pants after showering and catch a glimpse of myself in the mirror.

I try to imagine myself as I was in the days when gray dominated the world around me. The dull colors of my clothes have been replaced by darker shades. My eyes fall to my collar bone, where the corner of a tattoo peeks out from underneath my t-shirt. My muscles are defined, made strong by countless hours in the training room. The only resemblance I can see between me and my sixteen-year-old self is my hair. It is still cut like the Abnegation, short and bristly. I guess I've kept it this way as a reminder that Abnegation is still a part of me, for the same reasons I got the tattoos on my back. Choosing one quality over another, like the factions, limits us, sometimes even makes us cruel. Sighing, I shut off the light and leave the room.

After weaving my way through the hallways, I find myself surrounded by a throng of excited members, eagerly awaiting the initiates' arrival. I spot Lauren, whose eyes are already on mine, as she maneuvers her way through the mass of Dauntless. Reaching me, she straightens her shirt and tucks her hair behind her ears.

"Ready?" she asks.

"As I'll ever be." I grin.

When I do, I find it is hard to stop. The excitement in the air is infectious, and my smile doesn't falter as we are swept along with the crowd. We break into a run, barreling down dark hallways, hundreds of feet pounding against the ground. Laughter bounces off the walls, and we turn a corner.

The hallway opens to a spacious cavern. A raised, wooden platform stands in its middle, above it a tightly woven net big enough to cradle a person. I haven't been here since last years' initiation. I climb the stairs of the platform and gaze skywards, narrowing my eyes against the setting sun. Its reflection throws faint, golden beams of light off the metal buildings that protect our headquarters from outside eyes. Everyone is focused on the tallest building in front of us. I don't want to remember the day I jumped; I don't want to remember standing alone, with only the wind for company, as I inched my way to the edge. At my shoulder along the perimeter of the net, Lauren grabs my arm.

"Look," she breathes. All I can make out is a gray blur plummeting towards us. Gray?

An instant passes and the net is stretching and conforming to the shape of a body. I lean over the railing encircling the net and stretch my fingers toward its center, like everyone else. A hand slips into my own, small and warm. I pull, and a girl rolls off the net. Before she falls, I catch her around the arms. She is surprisingly light, and when she looks up, her eyes are blue. The color of a clear summer sky. They do not match the rest of her face, which is small and plain. I release her when she straightens. She only reaches up to my collarbone.

"Thank you," she says. Her voice is low, for a girl's, and clear.

"Can't believe it," says Lauren, smirking, her laid-back demeanor replaced with Dauntless swagger. "A Stiff, the first to jump? Unheard of."

"There's a reason why she left them, Lauren," I say, feeling oddly distant. I turn back to the girl, who looks familiar. But, then again, all the Abnegation resemble each other. "What's your name?"

"Umm…" She hesitates.

Her eyes and mouth search for a name, displeased with the one she finds, just like I was. My initiation instructor gave me an escape from my old identity. I can give her one, too.

"Think about it," I say, a smile tugging at the corners of my mouth. "You don't get to pick again."

And her eyes lock on mine again, her gaze insistent. "Tris," she says firmly.

Tris doesn't sound like an Abnegation name. It must be short for something.

"Tris," Lauren says, tasting the name. "Make the announcement, Four."

I look over my shoulder and raise my voice to project to the crowd forming around us. "First jumper- Tris!"

This way, they will remember her for her first act of bravery. Everyone cheers and claps and thrusts their fists into the air in the way only the Dauntless can. A high scream snaps my head back to the net, where a Candor girl is clutching her stomach, a crazed smile spreading across her cheeks. The crowd breaks into laughter and lets out another round of cheers. I glance at Tris. She is my initiate anyway. I press my hand to her back in case she is not as steady as she seems. "Welcome to Dauntless," I say.