The Prince, the King and the Wardrobe
Summary: Nico comes out of the closet. With the 7 demigods of the prophecy around, hilarity naturally ensues. Crack!fic. Friendly flirt-banter, but can be taken as Jasico if so desired.
Disclaimer: This fic is a key example of why I do not own Percy Jackson and the Olympians.
Warnings: Very light Piper-bashing, innuendos and play-on-words, some bad words (coz Nico has a potty mouth, and Leo is a perv), Flirty!Jason, unamused!Nico, probable OOC-ness
Notes: Well, I REGRET NOTHING!
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The door of the wardrobe rattled.
"Guys, I'm coming out of the closet now," the teen stated, unamused.
"It's okay, Nico. You know we'd support you no matter what."
"That's not what I mean, Leo."
"So what, you're gonna stay in there?"
"No, I-"
"Well, I suppose you've got all those skeletons in there to keep you company," Giggles chorused throughout the spacious apartment.
Nico poked his head out of the wardrobe and stuck his tongue out at the son of Hephaestus.
"I'm sure I could find a better use for that tongue," cam a voice from within the closet.
Nico blushed, Hazel giggled, Leo and Frank fist-bumped and Piper stormed out of the room.
"Jason," the brunette began, his tone warning.
"Say it again," the son of Jupiter teased with a husky voice.
"Shut up!"
"Make me,"
"Oh, will you two just make out already?" Leo grinned
"What do you think we've been doing for the past seven minutes?" The blond mirrored the Latino's expression.
Hazel lost it. Tears streamed down her face, she was laughing so hard.
"I told you playing '7 Minutes in Heaven' was a bad idea," grumbled Nico, "I'm going back in the closet until you all shut up."
"Oh no you don't!" Jason shouted.
Before he knew what was going on, Nico was grabbed around the waist and slung over the blonde Superman's shoulder.
"Put me down this instance, Grace!" He slammed his fists against Jason's back.
He pretended to think it over, before replying with a cheeky "No!"
They –well, Jason- jogged around the apartment (Nico just hung on for the ride).
And then when Jason got bored with jogging, he decided to fly. Which freaked Nico out even further.
They were in mid-air when Jason readjusted Nico on his shoulder. "You want me to put you down?" he teased
The brunette yelped and hung on for dear life. "No! Jason, please don't let me go!"
'No Jason, please don't let me go'? Well, Jason was going to have to store that away for deep consideration. Later, though.
Nico drew him out of his musings with a bizarre observation.
"Dude, your ass is right near my face!" his cheeks glowed with embarrassment.
"Well, if it's any consolation, your ass is right near my face too."
Leo had a wicked smirk on his face. "Mmm mm Jassy, check out DAT ASS! Give that ass a squeeze!"
The son of Hades' eyes widened in shock, before he shouted "No one is touching my ass!"
Percy and Annabeth stuck their heads around the doorway, having just arrived at the apartment.
"Ummm, hi guys?" Percy tried to break the ice. "This isn't awkward or anything. And Jason, why is Nico on your shoulder?"
The blonde looked at Percy as if it was obvious. "Nico just came out of the closet."
"Looks like you dragged him out," muttered Annabeth.
Leo nodded. "Yeah, Jas here has a habit of making straight boys beg to be on his shoulders."
"I'm not into Jason!" Nico cried.
Hazel put on her 'don't try to bullshit me' face. "C'mon Nico. You're not even convincing yourself."
The Ghost King only groaned in response.
"Well, I'm happy for you anyway, Neeks," Percy decided to add. "And Jason, you know the whole, hurt him I hurt you thing?"
The blonde paled slightly, but nodded. "Yep. Got it, Jackson."
"Cool, man," he said as he held out his fist.
Smiling, Jason bumped his against Percy's.
An irritated sigh came from Jason's shoulder. "Does anyone care that I don't like him?"
"Nope!" Came the reply from all present.
Annabeth chose to elaborate. "You guys are always hanging out, or sneaking off together. But don't worry Nico, we all love you. And we will support you and Jason no matter what."
"I don't like him!"
"Oh hush. And besides," she lowered her voice to a whisper, "We like you and Jason better than Piper and Jason."
"I heard that!" Was shouted in a distressed tone from the bedroom above them.
"Damn," Hazel cursed, "Forgot about her Gossip-sensor powers from Aphrodite."
The daughter of Athena continued. ""We all know you like him, Nico."
"Lies, all lies," insisted the son of the Underworld.
"Fine, stay in denial. We'll just lock you in the closet for another 7 minutes!" The evil twinkle ignited in Leo's eyes.
Nico narrowed his eyes and glared at the group of demigods. "You wouldn't dare…"
"I'm up for it," Jason claimed, and dragged Nico's sorry ass back into the closet.
*In the Closet*
The brunette buried his face in Jason's back with a 'thunk.' He groaned at the utter craziness of his life. Jason, on the other hand, was greatly amused. And also greatly ticklish. The vibrations from Nico's groan made him break out in a fit of giggles.
"Nico,' he managed to get out between gasps of air, "Nico that tickles. Stop!"
But of course, Nico didn't stop. He grinned and began tickling the son of Jupiter with earnest. Peals of laughter from outside the wardrobe indicated that Hazel had once more lost it.
The boys ended up on opposite sides of the wardrobe breathing raggedly.
"So," Jason began, "Same time next week?"
"This game is stupid,"
"Oh, don't pretend you don't love it!" he grinned. And Nico couldn't help but grin –lopsided- back. He actually kind of did.
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Hahahaha! I had an absolute ball writing this! Please let me know what you think. Reviews make my heart go pitter-patter!
Love Peace and Rock always,
RockerBabe414