Goodbye, Finn Hudson

For Cory and Finn. Thank you, and goodbye.

Finn Hudson walked down the McKinley hallway, briefcase in hand, prepared for anything. He felt different for some reason, almost refreshed. He felt as if he was gliding along with no problems able to drag him down. He barely even noticed that the whole building, all around him, seemed to be lit with a beautiful, pure white light. The whole place was angelic. However, it was just silent. No one seemed to be around.

"Hello? Anyone?" Finn shouted. There was still no reply.

'Did Mr Schue reschedule rehearsals?' Finn thought to himself, but shook his head. Will would have text him if there had been a change of plan; after all, they were co-directors for the New Directions now.

Finn looked into every crystal clear window he went past, hoping he would see the Glee club waiting for him in there. He didn't want to be late for his first rehearsal as an official co-director. Eventually, he reached the choir room, but it was empty.

"Where is everyone?" Finn asked out loud. Suddenly, Finn was blinded by a bright light as a boy appeared before him. Finn was standing in the hallway as normal, but he could see himself, looking many years younger, talking to Matt Rutherford.

"I'm moving. There's been some trouble back home and I have to go back. I'm leaving McKinley." Matt had told Finn. Finn watched himself with a smile, knowing that he was about to give some good advice.

"Hey, Matt, if you need to do this then I understand, we all will, and if you want I'll just tell everyone you had to move and that you had no choice. No details. Okay?" Finn asked. Matt nodded.

"Yeah. Thanks, Finn." Matt said and hugged Finn, who smiled.

"Make sure things go your way, okay? We'll miss you." Finn said.

"I'll miss you too, Finn. I'll miss you." Matt replied, giving Finn a look almost knowingly. Finn never understood what Matt had meant by the last words he said to him.

Finn found himself confused as Matt was waving goodbye and then suddenly everything changed to an image of Burt holding a younger Finn on the couch in the Hudson-Hummel home.

"I'm sorry; I shouldn't have called it...that." Finn said, fighting back tears and Burt held him tighter.

"It's okay kid, I shouldn't have lashed out like that. It's just a lamp at the end of the day, and you're a person. You're part of my family now, Finn, and I promise I'm going to do my best to make sure you're always happy." Burt said as the younger Finn sobbed more.

Finn watched the sequence play out as Burt and his younger self had a heart-to-heart for hours, holding back tears. That was the day, Finn remembered, that he knew Burt would be an amazing stepfather. And Burt certainly didn't let him down. Finn hoped that he had done well by Burt, and made him proud.

The image faded as Finn saw himself approaching Sugar in the hallway.

"I know Rachel was kinda rude back there, but the Glee club is like her baby and she'll protect it any way she can. Once she warms to you there'll be no problems. You'll get in, don't worry." Finn had told her.

"I'm not sure I know who Rachel is or who you are, but thanks anyway...uh..."

"...Finn. Finn Hudson."

"Yeah. Thanks, Finn Hudson". Sugar said and wandered off as the image faded.

Next, Finn saw himself with his arm around Ryder Lynn.

"I know what Unique did to you was bad, Ryder, but leaving the Glee club isn't the right way to go about it. Talk things through with her. I told you that you'd feel like you belong and be safe in that club and I'll look after you. I promise." Finn said. Ryder smiled.

"Thanks, Finn. And I really am glad that I'm in Glee club. It's a great place to be, and I wouldn't have been a part of it if it wasn't for you." Ryder said and hugged Finn. The image faded.

"Dude, I wish I could dance like you. Hell, I wish I could dance." Finn watched himself saying to Jake Puckerman during a dance rehearsal for Grease.

"Well, maybe I could help you improve your dancing if you could help me improve my voice?" Jake asked.

"Deal, but last time I really tried to dance I broke a girl's nose." Finn said and the two boys laughed. The older Finn laughed along with them as the image faded.

"Hey Hudson, quick Q, what's Puckerman into?" Lauren had asked Finn years ago.

"Well...sports, chocolate, girls, girls and more girls..." Finn listed.

"I meant bedroom-wise." Lauren said.

"Woah, I don't know about any of that. Why don't you just sit down and talk to him, get to know him, and then you can find out what he's into by yourself and create a stronger bond between you both." Finn suggested. Lauren considered and nodded after a few seconds.

"Good advice. Thanks, Hudson." Lauren said. Finn remained confused as the image faded again into something different. He was concerned about what was happening around him, but continued to watch these wonderful visions.

"I'll miss you when you go back to Ireland, buddy." Finn said to Rory.

"I'll miss you too. I'm scared about the future. You never know what it holds." Rory admitted. Finn nodded in agreement.

"Yeah, that's true. See ya soon, dude."

"Goodbye, Finn...goodbye."

Another image formed in front of Finn, and he saw himself talking to an angry Kitty.

"I don't even know who this character is!" Kitty exclaimed, holding the Grease cast list in her hand.

"Kitty, I cast you in that part because there is no one else who could do it justice. You'd be incredible and no one would come close to doing it as well as you." Finn said.

"...You're quite the charmer, Hudson. I like you." Kitty said and walked off.

Another new image formed, this time Finn was talking to Joe Hart as they walked down the corridor.

"So, I think me and Quinn...well, nothing's really happening...at all." Joe admitted.

"Talk to her about it then. Slowly and thoroughly. She respects that kind of stuff." Finn said. Joe nodded.

"Then Jesus won't judge me...cool, thanks man." Joe said and rushed off to find Quinn. Finn smiled as he watched him go, and the image faded into pure white light once more.

"Sorry about the whole Rizzo and Grease thing, Unique. I really did want it to work out." Finn said.

"It's okay Finn, you don't have anything to apologise for. I wish everyone was accepting of me as you are. You're an incredible person." Unique told Finn.

"As are you. I'll see you in Glee club." Finn said with a smile and walked off.

Another image formed, this time of Finn talking to Becky by her locker.

"So, Becky-"

"-Shut it Hudson, I offered you a chance to get with this beautiful bod, but like all good things, it EXPIRED." Becky snapped.

"Um...actually, I saw an advert for this really awesome looking college for mentally handicapped people, and it looks awesome. I wrote down the name and address for you. That is, if you want to go to college." Finn said and handed Becky the slip of paper with the details on. Becky stared at it for a moment, looked up at Finn and hugged him tight.

"Thank you, Finn. You're always nice to me." Becky said. Finn smiled.

"I care about you Becky, and always will." Finn said.

"And I'll always care about you..." Becky replied. Finn smiled and walked away, satisfied.

"...until the very end."

Finn saw his younger self on a football field, where Ken Tanaka approached him.

"So, what's your name and what position would you like to try out for?" Ken asked.

"I'm Finn Hudson, and I want to be the quarterback."

"The quarterback? Well, Hudson, if you get that position it will stick with you for the rest of your life. You'll always be the quarterback, even after it's all over. You'd be okay with that?" Ken asked and Finn nodded enthusiastically. Ken smiled.

"Well, uh, let's see what you've got." Ken said and started try-outs.

As Finn watched his younger self proudly, he smiled, remembering how good he felt when he ran all the way home after try-outs to tell Carole he was the quarterback, forever and always.

"Hey, Hudson! You rocked it in Glee club today!"

"As did you, Miss Holliday!" Finn shouted back to the pretty blonde substitute.

"Naturally! You know what, Finn, I think you're gonna go far. See ya soon!" Holly told him.

Finn looked back at that moment and smiled as he remembered how happy he felt to be complimented. He missed that. The image faded again.

Finn watched his younger self as he prepared to go on stage to sing 'Somebody To Love' as April Rhodes stumbled past him.

"Look after yourself, handsome." April said with a giggle.

"And you, April." Finn replied. April walked off with a smile and looked back at Finn as he walked on stage.

What a guy, she thought to herself.

Finn watched his ten-year-old self playing in the street when a football hit the back of his head. He turned around to see a young David Karofsky.

"You are such a dork." Karofsky commented. Finn rolled his eyes at him.

"Come on; let's just go to the field and play. The other guys are waiting." Finn said, picking up the ball. Karofsky snatched it back.

"Mine." Karofsky said.

"Just you wait till I'm a quarterback." Finn said.

"If you are, I'll gladly follow you. But for now, no way." Karofsky said.

Finn watched his past experience and remembered the anger he felt, but he was glad that they eventually solved their feud years later.

"I heard you're getting married." Jesse said to Finn before their last ever show choir competition. Finn nodded.

"Congratulations." Jesse said and held out his hand. After some reluctance and thought, Finn shook it. Jesse walked off and Finn watched as he turned back.

"Rachel loves you, and I can see you love her. Look after her." Jesse said.

"I will, until the end. She'll be there till the end of me." Finn said. Jesse smiled and walked off. The image faded as Finn saw another new image form.

Finn watched as his younger self walked past Emma's office as she walked out.

"Oh, hello Finn. How are things?" Emma said.

"Well, Rachel and I are dating again and I'm a little sore down there but that's normal right?" Finn replied.

"Uh, yes, well, uh...and Mr Schuester? Um...Will?"

"He's pumped for Sectionals and sort of wishes you were going. He doesn't like to show it though. You were the only other adult who has ever been on our side." Finn explained.

"I wish I could go, I really do, but things are so busy at home. I'm sorry. Next time, I promise." Emma said.

"I'll hold you to that," Finn said with a smile, "Well I better go to my geology class."

"...You have geography now, Finn." Emma said, a smile spreading across her face as Finn checked his timetable.

"Oh, yeah...crap!" Finn exclaimed as he ran down the corridor. Emma laughed at him as he ran down.

"He'll work it out one day." Emma said to herself. Finn laughed at Emma's comment and his younger self and he thought to himself.

I got there in the end.

A new image appeared as Finn saw him sat next to a crying Tina.

"I broke Artie's trust." Tina said, crying.

"How?"

"I lied about my stutter. He said it created a bond between us."

"He really cares about you Tina, and Glee club has taught me that no matter what he always will." Finn said. Tina smiled.

"Thank you Finn, I'm sorry if you thought it was Rachel practicing her crying again." Tina said.

"I'm so glad it wasn't."

The two of them laughed as the image faded.

"Finn, I need some time off from the play." Marley said nervously.

"Oh, really? How come? It's just, you're kind of important." Finn said.

"My mom has been having health trouble and I need to be home and I need to help her for a while. I don't think I'll be able to carry on-"

"-I'm not letting you give up on this. You're an awesome Sandy. How about I look after your mom when you're rehearsing?" Finn suggested.

"I couldn't ask you to do that, you're the director."

"I'm doing it. It would be my pleasure." Finn said with a smile.

"Thank you so much, Finn. You're an amazing teacher, and an amazing guy." Marley said.

"...You really think I'm a good teacher?" Finn asked, touched, as Marley nodded enthusiastically and ran off with a smile.

Finn smiled as he remembered how proud he was of himself at that moment. The moment he knew what he wanted to do with his life. He couldn't wait to get started.

The image faded and changed into Brittany appearing in front of a whiteboard, with Finn watching his younger self taking notes as she spoke.

"So, you use a dash to dash over to the answer to the question. And you use lower case letters only when talking about skirts and bunnies. And if all else fails, pout and show people your boobs." Brittany explained. Finn started to laugh.

"Brittany, you're awesome."

"You're pretty awesome too, Finn."

"See, you nailed it! That was all you, Finn." Mike said after Finn had finally managed to perform a dance move after a few hours practice.

"I can't believe it, thanks Mike!" Finn said as Mike patted him on the back.

"See, the hard work pays off." Mike said.

The two boys laughed and shook hands as the image faded.

"Wait! No! Come back!" Finn shouted as one of his favourite memories disappeared and changed into a new image.

"Artie, no way. I've already gotten in trouble for this." Finn said as he wheeled Artie down the corridor.

"Finn, please, one last try. It's not like you can get kicked off the team again, you've got nothing to lose now." Artie said.

"Well...I guess you're right. What's the plan?" Finn asked.

"I thought you could come up with one." Artie said.

"You think I could come up with a plan that could work?"

"You're a good leader Finn, better than you think. Your plans are almost always awesome, too. Just believe in yourself and you'll get by. That's what I've had to do. Live every day like it's your last." Artie said. Finn smiled.

"Okay, well I think I have a plan."

"There you go!" Artie said encouragingly. The two boys smiled as Finn wheeled Artie to the locker room.

Mercedes was laughing in the choir room at Finn suggesting they should date to make Rachel jealous.

"Come on Mercedes, we could work." Finn said.

"No Hudson, we couldn't."

"You let Puck date you."

"I was an insecure sophomore, and now I'm a juicy junior. I have a lot more R-E-S-P-E-C-T for myself. I ain't getting caught up in ANOTHER Glee club love triangle." Mercedes argued.

"Rachel knows I have a thing for powerful singers, I think she'd buy it." Finn said.

"If you still like her, get her back." Mercedes suggested.

"It's not that simple. I want her to get back with me when she's ready. As I am now, I don't think she is. She might just settle for me. She deserves better than that." Finn said, pouring out his heart.

"She deserves you, Finn. You're a great guy." Mercedes said and hugged Finn, who smiled.

"Thanks Mercedes."

The two of them faded away.

Finn was pacing as Coach Beiste watched him.

"Come on Finn, calm down. I promised I'd help you, and I will. We'll find some players to be in Grease, don't worry." Shannon said.

"Okay, thanks Coach, for always having my back."

"No problem. You're gonna be really good at this pumpkin. I know it in my heart."

Finn began to tear up as the image faded.

"HUDSON!" Sue shouted as she approached Finn in the choir room.

"I won fair and square, you can't do this." Sue added.

"Sorry Sue, but the Glee club will be in this choir room forever. It's theirs by right." Finn said.

"I was wrong about you, Hudson, you are a worthy adversary. Good to see you finally standing up for yourself and getting a haircut that looks normal." Sue said and walked out.

"Uh, thanks Coach Sylvester." Finn said. Sue stopped at the door and faced him.

"Until the next time, Hudson."

Finn watched his younger self help unpack Sam's things into the spare room at the Hudson-Hummel home.

"Thanks Finn, this means a lot." Sam said, tears in his eyes.

"No problem, dude. Plus, we need you to win Sectionals so it's not completely selfless." Finn said and Sam laughed.

"It still means the world to me. Whatever you need, I'll be there. Every single time." Sam said. Finn began to tear up as he watched the memory fade.

Sam, wait! Why does this keep happening? What's going on?

Finn and Blaine shook hands, finally at peace. Blaine went back to his boxing.

"I'm glad you didn't punch me now I know you can box." Finn said. Blaine chuckled.

"I could never punch you; Kurt would never forgive me. Plus, I owe a lot to you." Blaine said.

"How come?" Finn asked.

"This Glee club wouldn't have lasted three weeks without you. If it hadn't, Kurt wouldn't have been able to come to Dalton and meet me. Everything that's good in my life has happened because of you, Finn. That's how much you mean to me. If you need anything, just ask." Blaine said.

Finn felt touched. "Well, I could use some hair gel tips."

Blaine started laughing.

"Now I might just punch you." Blaine said jokingly as the two boys laughed together.

The memory faded.

Finn felt himself crying as he looked back on a bad memory; his younger self was chasing Santana down the corridor.

"Santana, I'm sorry. I didn't know the whole school would find out."

"You've ruined my whole life, Finn. It's all over and it's YOUR FAULT." Santana screamed.

"I never wanted this." Finn said.

"It's too late, I can't forgive you. I don't think I ever can." Santana said as Finn cried.

The image faded. Finn thought about how glad he was he and Santana had made peace in a way, but that was the one Finn he knew he'd always regret.

"Finn, stop!" Quinn exclaimed as she got out of her chair.

"I'm trying to look out for you."

"I hurt you; I get it, but don't start judging who I date. That's not your job, or even your place!" Quinn said.

Finn looked down. Quinn sighed.

"Look, I know what you're trying to do, and I appreciate it. But you don't have to look after me. I'm gonna be okay. We both are." Quinn said gently. Finn smiled as the image faded.

"You know dude, it's not too late to come to LA with me." Puck said.

"Thanks Puck, but the army is where I need to be." Finn replied.

"Okay, but I feel like a wimp. I always thought I was the biggest badass in this place, but now, you're the claimer of the number one spot dude."

"Thanks, Puck. You go careful."

"You too, Finn. You're my best friend. Always." Puck said. Finn smiled.

"Always."

Finn watched his younger self hug Puck.

You still are my best friend, Puckerman.

"Thanks for letting me choose a set list with you, Mr Schue." Finn said.

"Finn, you can call me Will, you're not my student anymore. Plus, I'm glad I asked you. Your ideas are great and they fit in with the theme. We'll definitely run through them and see if the guys like them." Will said.

"Thanks. I just wish I could be there to support them this weekend, Regionals is tough. Tell them I love them, yeah?" Finn said.

"Of course. They love you too, Finn. You mean a lot to them. You mean a lot to me." Will said.

"You mean a lot to me too." Finn said and hugged Will.

"You're going places Finn, I can see it. I'm so proud of you."

"See you soon." Finn said.

"Yeah. Goodbye, Finn."

The memory faded. Finn wondered once again what was happening before him.

Finn was sat in the living room as Kurt walked in.

"I heard the appointment went well." Finn said, standing up.

"Yeah, he's cancer free!" Kurt said excitedly as Finn hugged him.

"That's AWESOME! Sorry I couldn't be there, dude." Finn said.

"You were busy." Kurt said.

"That's no excuse to miss your dad's appointment."

"Our dad's appointment." Kurt said. Finn smiled.

"You're a great brother, you know that?" Finn asked.

"I couldn't have asked for a better brother." Kurt said.

The two boys hugged as they went to the kitchen to make dinner for their parents.

Finn watched proudly as his only slightly younger self watched over as his mom finished packing him a case.

"There you go, everything you need for college." Carole said.

"Thanks, mom. I'll be visiting soon."

Carole started to tear up.

"I'm so proud of you, Finn. Your dad would be too. I love you."

"I love you, mom." Finn said and hugged his mother tight as tears ran down both of their faces.

"We've had ups and downs, but we've made it." Carole said.

"You're the best mom ever." Finn said. Carole kissed him on the cheek.

"Now then, you go to college and make me proud." Carole said. Finn smiled.

"I will, mom. I promise."

The image faded again as Finn watched himself from only the day before getting into his car and answering his phone as it went off.

"Hello?"

"Finn, it's Rachel."

Rachel appeared, her phone next to her ear. Finn watched over the memory and looked at Rachel.

She is beautiful.

"Hey, Rachel. Did you hear New Directions won Regionals?" Finn asked, knowing Rachel was smiling on the other end.

"No! That's great! I'm so proud of you. You've come so far this year." Rachel said.

"So have you. Things really are looking up." Finn said.

"Yeah..." Rachel said.

"What's up?" Finn asked.

"I haven't heard anything from Funny Girl yet. I...I guess I didn't get it."

"You got it Rachel, trust me. I know. You're Rachel Berry and you're a star." Finn said supportively.

"...I miss you so much." Finn heard Rachel say, and could tell she was crying.

"I miss you too."

"You know I love you Finn, don't you? I never stopped from the second I first saw you." Rachel said.

"I love you too, so much. We'll get there in the end, won't we?" Finn asked.

"Of course we will!" Rachel said before letting out a squeal.

"That's them! Funny Girl are calling me on the other line!"

"Answer it then! And tell me when you're first show is; I'll be there in the front row. I promise!" Finn said.

"Thank you! Bye, Finn."

"Bye, Rachel."

The two hung up and Finn smiled to himself as everything faded into a white light again.

Finn was brought back to the empty hallway he walked into in the first place.

"What was all that?" He asked himself.

He walked into the choir room and was shocked to find a woman there he recognised.

"Hang on, you're the lady in the photo in the choir room! Lillian Adler!" Finn said.

"Hello, dear. What's your name?" Lillian asked.

"Finn."

"Well Finn, nice to meet you."

"What are you doing here?" Finn asked.

"I'm waiting for my Glee club to come home. You?" Lillian asked.

"Same." Finn said and sat on the chair next to Lillian.

"Well then, we can wait together." Lillian said.

"Wait, but you're de-"

Finn paused as everything clicked into place in his mind. Tears filled his eyes as disbelief and shock filled his head.

"Wait...am I dead?" Finn desperately looked at Lillian, who frowned and nodded.

"I'm...I'm dead." Finn said and put his head in his hands. He began to sob as Lillian put her arm around him. He stood up and pushed her away as he sadness turned to rage.

"NO! I can't be dead, I'm not ready! Kurt, my friends, New Directions, they need me! I need them! My mom...oh my god, my mom...and...Rachel. We're meant to be together. I know we are. We're meant to live happily ever after with all of our friends. IT'S NOT FAIR!" Finn shouted, slamming his hands on the piano.

"I know it's not fair, sweetie." Lillian said.

"NO! I'm...I'm going back. I want to go back. I have to go back. I need to go back. Please...please tell me I can go back." Finn pleaded as tears ran down his face.

"This isn't something we can go back from, Finn."

"I DON'T CARE! I want to be sat on the front row on Kurt and Blaine's wedding day! I want to see Rachel's Broadway debut! I want to buy Mercedes' first album! I want to see the day when Artie get walk again! I want to see Mr Schue and Miss Pillsbury's children take their first steps! I want to see MY children take their first steps! I...I WANT TO HAVE CHILDREN!" Finn said and sobbed more, even screaming in agony. He grew silent and stood for a moment, lost in thought, before taking a seat next to Lillian again.

"...What do we do?" Finn asked.

"We sit here, and we wait. Once everyone you love is ready, they'll come to you and wait with you. Then, you'll all go somewhere else." Lillian said.

"Where?"

"I don't know. Somewhere good, I bet." Lillian answered.

Finn began to cry again.

"I'm sorry, I'm sorry." Finn said as Lillian held him tight.

"It's going to be okay, it'll all be okay. Everyone will be okay. We just have to wait. You see, you're right, you are meant to be with Rachel Berry and you will have you will live happily ever after. You just weren't meant to be together forever in life. When it's her time she'll come and wait with you and then you can literally live happily ever after. And then Kurt, Blaine, Will...all your loved ones will join you too. The story never ends. And for now, they'll miss you and you'll miss them." Lillian said.

"Okay, just one thing...Rachel, does she get the role?"

"...Yes, she does. She sells out every night on Broadway and becomes a star." Lillian explained.

"That's my girl." Finn said and cried again.

"Everything you wanted, it happens. And one day, you'll see everyone again and you'll see it for yourself." Lillian said.

Finn continued to cry on Lillian's shoulder as the two of them waited.

Finn waited and waited for the day he would start to see his loved ones again. He would see his friends and family again one day. One day, he'd see Artie walk into the choir room and wait with him. One day, he'd get to see Kurt and Blaine's wedding rings and meet their children. One day, he could hug his mom again. One day, everyone he knew and loved would wait with him. One day, he'd see Rachel walk in to the choir room and say "I'm home". One day, he'd get his happily ever after.

One day.

Thanks for reading, and if you ever need someone to talk to about this just message me, because I still struggle not to cry and it's been over seven months. I'll always be here to offer support. I don't think I've ever cried as much as I did writing this.

This story was based upon another story by Glost, who kindly gave me permission to adapt their story. Thanks must go to you for creating such a brilliant piece of writing in the first place, and I hope I did your original story justice by adding in elements of my own. Check out Glost's original story; it's called 'Goodbye to a, Finn Hudson'.

R.I.P. Cory, You will be loved. Always. I'll never put into words how much you'll always mean to me.