Naruto stared at the clock on the wall, watching it tick, tick, tick. His mind was blank, except for one thing. "Ramen, ramen, ramen. He's taking forever, ramen." His stomach growled. He'd sent Stiches out an hour ago. Naruto rested his head against the cold counter as he thought over the events of the last six months.

He and Stench had spent every night outside for a week hunting and trapping animals. The days of course were still spent at the academy, which was where the first of many surprises showed up. Gnarl had forgotten to tell him something about his new headwear. Like the fact he could fucking talk through it!

Naruto sat with his head supported on his palm. Everything was so boring. The lecture he was listening to was way above his head, the fact he'd signed up for this class on advancing his general knowledge of chakra had been a shock, not quite the same shock as when he showed up at school in his new outfit sans his orange pants ,(which just felt uncomfortable under his shin guards) but definitely a shock, but it had been worth it. Iruka had been so happy that Naruto had started taking his lessons seriously he'd taken him out for a bowl or six of ramen.

His attention wasn't entirely on the lesson in jutsu manipulation. If the instructor could have just dumbed it down a smidge he'd have found it one of the most useful lessons he ever had. The ability to take a normal jutsu and change it's affects in different ways would have been great. Imagine making a solid clone! Or using the substitution jutsu as a way to move around. Or even transforming his body into a perfect genetic copy of a woman, wait, where did that last one come from?

"Ooh, very interesting, so many possibilities master. Can you imagine what we could do with this?"

"Gah!" Naruto screamed as he looked around while the rest of the class (who mostly consisted of actual genin and, was that a chuunin hiding up there?) stared at him. "Sorry, sorry." He scrunched down in his seat still looking around. "Gnarl?" he whispered. "Where are you?"

The aged minion chuckled. "Ah, I see I forgot to mention that. The hood you wear was forged from the minion helmet. It allows me to see and hear what happens around you so that I may advise you better. I do apologize master, but, how else was I going to learn about your world?"

Naruto thought for a moment. "I thought I'd tell you?" he asked hesitantly.

He could almost feel Gnarl's amusement as he asked. "And how much of what the man said did you understand?"

Naruto sat quietly before answering the only way he could. "Shut up."

And that was only the beginning, the hunting he'd done originally had netted him six new minions. Two of the brown newborns had quickly been co-opted by Gnarl and Grubby for the digging team. With their help they'd started to carve a new cavern within the Hokage monument, a base of operations for the minions, but with the help of the newborns innate need to kill things the cavern had quickly filled to capacity, meaning a new and bigger one was currently being carved. As such hunting had stopped for the next few days as the various browns were taught to build instead of smash. And of course there were the tunnels. Once the cavern was finished the dig team had started work on tunnels that criss crossed the village and had entrances and exits concealed in all sorts of strange places. Whenever Naruto needed a minion for something, one was always close by. And then of course there was how the Ichiraku's reacted to Naruto's new friends.

Naruto sat on his favorite stool at Ichiraku's quietly, which, as anyone who knew Naruto would tell you, was just unnatural. Ayame leaned over the counter top to press a hand against his head. It wouldn't be the first time he came to their stand when he should have been in bed. "Aww, what's wrong Naruto, what's eating you?"

Naruto flinched, he wouldn't be surprised if the minions actually did eat him. They were strange that way. "Oh, nothing Ayame, just a weird couple of days." He smiled up at her before he noticed that all-pervading stench. Ayame blanched.

"Naruto! Did you eat rotten sushi again?" Naruto hit his head off the counter. "Dammit, not now." That was when Ayame's father ran out of the backroom with a cleaver as he chased something that slammed into Ayame's legs before a knife disappeared. Naruto reacted instantly jumping over the counter and backhanded empty air. Stench hit the wall dazed. "Never touch them!"

Stench quivered in fear, (at least Naruto hoped it was fear) when he gave the order. "Yes master, as you say master. Theys be under the Overlord's protection." He turned invisible and moved out of the stand quickly. Ayame stared at where Stench had vanished and then back to Naruto, a smile on her face.

Since that incident the Ichirakus had formed an uneasy peace with the minions. Well, the browns at least, Stench wasn't allowed anywhere near the stand. The smell of rot and decay didn't really mesh well with the civilian appetites. (Strangely enough, the two times he had shown up the ninjas acted unaffected, and he was pretty sure the key word there was acted.) The fact was that the minions occassionally came in themselves through a tunnel dug in the store room to either bring ramen for Naruto, or for themselves.

Naruto didn't bother to ask where they were getting the money (since he didn't really want to know) and the Ichiraku's had more or less shrugged the strange creatures off as a summoning contract, which had sent Gnarl on a quest of research that hadn't really born any fruit yet.. Especially since Naruto had more or less forbidden Gnarl from stealing what he needed. Stench still seemed annoyed with how much the minion master used him as a gopher.

Naruto stood up as he heard a scratching in his walls that signalled Stitches' return. The horrifying little creature opened the trap door Naruto had made into the crawl space between floors, well, crawlspace for a minion anyways. He pushed the containers into Naruto's waiting hands as he crawled out. Stitches' name was well deserved. He was the first new minion born, and he'd had an unfortunate run in with a cat soon after. The wounds had been sewn shut and nobody had ever bothered to remove the sutures since Stitches hadn't complained. The fact that the cat was now a cloak with attached hood had ceased bothering Naruto months ago. What did bother him was the cat's collar that was still around Stitch's waist. (So far it had made an excellent belt.)

"What took you so long?" Naruto briefly wondered if he shouldn't be a little nicer, but given the little monsters didn't seem to care one way or the other he didn't give it much thought.

"I's sorry master, many peoples at the stand and you tell us to stay unnoticed."

Naruto nodded for a moment. The last thing he needed was for anybody else to see them. He was lucky the Ichirakus were his friends and willing to keep it secret. "Gnarl, how are the digging crews doing?" Naruto started eating as he listened to Gnarl's report through his connection.

The answer from the brown came slowly. "Ah, yes. They go well sire. Today the diggers broke into a large room. It appears to have been made and sealed off, it's quite large and will make excellent barracks for your minions. Unless you take to spawning en masse, we should be fine for awhile, I am also pleased to tell you there were furnishings we were able to salvage, we're already preparing the old caverns as your personal apartments. You'll need them when you take your first mistress."

Naruto choked as his ramen sprayed across the room.

Naruto sat as his desk with his head down, his head pounding. Trying to keep the minions in line when they were with him was hard. At most he could control two, the rest were too easily distracted with shiny things and mayhem, rather like small children. While Gnarl had done some research on a way to bind them closer to his will, it was slow going without the old totems he'd told his master about. Their function had been simple. They connected the minions and his will, the more pieces of it, the stronger the link was. Unfortunately, like the tower heart, the great pillars, and the spell stones they were lost.

"How the heck am I supposed to do this?"

"Do what?" Naruto jerked suddenly very much aware he was next to Shikamaru, the smartest and laziest kid he'd ever met. Though Sakura came a close second on the smartest scale. Hell, maybe he could use it. "I have a problem that's an awful lot like herding cats. Got any ideas on how to keep them under control?"

Naruto probably shouldn't have been surprised when Shikamaru's one word answer was, "leashes."

Naruto mumbled, "yeah, sure. Thanks a lot."

Shikamaru looked over at his blonde companion. He had been acting very differently recently. "He's been acting weird, maybe I should investigate. Nah, too troublesome." With that Shikamaru put Naruto out of his mind and went to sleep.

"Sire, when you're done please, come to the mountain, we've prepared your magnificence an entrance, we look forward to showing you the beginnings of your new domain."

Naruto nodded. "Of course Gnarl." right before a piece of chalk hit him in the head.

"No talking in class! Detention."

"Dammit."

Naruto headed towards the Hokage monument, being careful to amble, ambling was always good. If you didn't look like you were on a mission people tended to ignore you more. He caught a whiff of something nasty right before a slightly better smell went off and people started rushing from the streets. Naruto took it as a chance to move quickly and sped up towards the monument. "I'll have to have a word with Stench again, I never should have shown him how to make a stink bomb."

Naruto smiled as the monument came into view and started to look around for some sign of the entrance, though to be honest, he'd done his job well with teaching them how to make hidden doors. It was one of his best skills, after all, how else do you disappear in a village full of grown ninja.

Naruto sighed as he moved between trees at the bottom of the monument before blinking. Hung in a tree was a white sheet, or part of it anyways, that had an orange minion face on it. He smiled for a moment. "I like it." He said as he moved closer to it and spotted the brown who thought he was so cleverly disguised as a bush. "Lead on Gren."

The brown that covered itself in branches, leaves, and a single bird nailed to one of the branches, started to move away. Gren was weird, he was obsessed with Stench and the greens' ability to hide, and he practiced his camouflage abilities everywhere he went. It was really too bad that he sucked at them. Gnarl had even suggested they make him the new jester at one point, though Naruto didn't understand why, he wasn't particularly funny.

Gren led him a small distance away after grabbing the sheet, and straight towards a boulder. He smiled even as he inserted a single claw underneath the stone and started to lift. Naruto gaped for a second as a cave entrance was revealed before hesitantly heading inwards, it was then he noticed the weights on either side of the cave that were doing the bulk of the work of lifting the boulder. He turned to Gren who smiled, or grimaced, or sneered. It was hard to tell with something that had so many teeth.

Two browns in helmets stepped forward, smacked Gren for leaving the door open, and pushed the weights back up, dropping the boulder door. Gnarl stepped out of an alcove formed into the rock. "Welcome Sire, to the barracks. "

Naruto nodded absently at Gnarl while looking at the door. "Impressive work."

Gnarl followed Naruto's gaze. "Ahh, that. While I wish we could take credit for it, I cannot. The tunnel had caved in, and while clearing it of debris we found this. We had to replace a few pieces, but I rather like it. Now come, let me show you to the barracks and your chambers." Gnarl said as he turned around and moved up the tunnel.

Naruto continued to look at the door before following Gnarl through the caves into something he instantly recognized as he looked at the alcoves carved into the wall."Hey, this is one of the civilian bunkers!"

Gnarl looked for him, "The civilian what sire?"

Naruto looked at him. "Civilian bunker. In case of an attack genin are shown bunkers hidden around Konoha to evacuate civilians to. The tunnel probably collapsed sometime between wars."

Gnarl nodded his head. "That would explain things sire. There were much preserved food, though most of it was rotten, your minions quite enjoyed it."

Naruto blanched at the thought of eating rotten rations. That stuff tasted horrible to begin with, he could only imagine what they'd be like if they actually turned bad. "You've been busy."

"More so than you know sire. Come, I wish you to see what will be the core of your domain." With that Gnarl turned and led to a large basin that once would have held water for the bunker. "This master is a solution I've prepared for the growth of a crystal, a new heart. The old one was consumed in the old days, it's magic drained until it was nothing but a hunk of rock, and even that was smashed in an attempt to keep us from reviving it. There was no way to restore it, but now we have new hope. Right now any crystal that formed within that vat would be nothing more than something pretty to look at. It needs more to become a true Heart. It needs life and power, I must harmonize it so that life force lost within it's range will be absorbed and for that I will need your jewel. Harmonizing it will also allow it to draw some from you as it grows."

Naruto was surprised for a minute that he understood what the old minion was talking about. Must have been those extra classes. "But, chakra exhaustion can be deadly, if it's absorbing my chakra how am I suppose to fight?"

Gnarl nodded. "The drain should be minimal sire. It would take much life force for it to grow quickly enough for you to notice. I would imagine it as the work of several years before it's grown much larger than a rock."

Naruto nodded and unstrapped the armband before handing it to Gnarl. The minion nodded as he took it towards the basin and submerged the jewel, carefully placing it in the center of a circle of symbols. "Come sire. You will need to focus your chakra through it to complete the process."

Naruto hesitantly walked over and looked at the red fluid filling the basin, the only thing that didn't remind him of blood was it's smell, the seemingly thin liquid bulged in the place the jewel sat. "So, Gnarl, heh, this is some kind of ancient ritual with no side effects right?" he asked nervously.

Gnarl cocked his head and thought for a moment. "Not really sire. This will only be the third. The first was an obelisk made of stone so dark it would never shine, no matter how much we polished it. We never did learn of it's origins. It was lost in a great upheavel where it fell into a river of fire in the depths of the earth. We probably shouldn't have built our lair so close to a volcano, but the island was well protected."

Naruto looked at him awkwardly. "And the second?"

Gnarl looked back to the liquid. "It was forged from pure magic by a sage who became indebted and friendly with a previous overlord, well, overlady I should say. But either way we have no technique for creating a heart. Truthfully, I've no idea what might happen. It's rather exciting."

Naruto stared at Gnarl. "And if I die?"

The minion master smiled. "Then we find a new overlord, just as we have always done, and your sacrifice will be remembered. for a couple of years anyways." He added in a silent voice.

"What was that?"

"Nothing sire. Please proceed, just place a finger on the gem and channel your chakra."

Naruto shook his head as he did what was asked and started to push his energy into the crystal. He watched in amazement as the red liquid began to churn and heave, bubbles forming and vanishing within it. It soon began to glow a small darkness appeared next to the armband.

"Enough master. That should do."

Naruto sighed in relief as he dropped where he stood, the symbols blazing with a yellow light. Gnarl pulled a small metal rod from his cloak and pushed at the dark object before smiling again. "Perhaps it might not take as long as I feared. The crystal has already started forming." He nodded his head. "Giblet Stench, help the master to his chambers. I will speak to him once he's rested."

The two nodded and pulled Naruto to his feet before carrying him into his new chambers. His jaw dropped, for what had once been a simple cavern was now, luxurious. Four statues of minions stood at each corner of an overly large bed draped in fur blankets made from something he couldn't identify. Each statue held a glowing stone of a different color above it's head. One with fins was holding a blue light, one he recognized as Stench held a green. Gnarl himself stood at a third point with his yellow crystal blazing above him, and one with cracks in it's stone skin held a red gem. In addition to this each wall had been shaped to a normal if expensive home with everything even. There was even a desk carved out of the wall with a matching seat in front of it.

And he smiled. Having minions does come with some nice perks.

A/N I have two reviews I wish to answer, one, I got on this chapter and decided to add a note for here, and the second is from a guest of the first, One. I will not be bashing Sakura or Sasuke. Sasuke might still end up evil, but I don't know, as for pairings, sakura may or may not end up with him, but Hinata, that's almost a guarantee, she's his stalker in a crossover that includes mistresses. I haven't fully decided yet.

To the guest, While I did like the idea of using the uchiha massacre to recreate the heart, this is sadly, post massacre and between a year or two before the start of the series. But keep up your ideas, and thanks for reading.