A/N: Just to start out, I want to say thanks for stopping by & checking this out. I hope you really do enjoy reading this. Read & Review please.

As for the story, I do need to establish a few things before moving on:

Tara never went to Patterson's office after she found Jax with Collete.

Clay was indeed shot and killed in front of Tara, Gemma, and Nero.

Patterson didn't reach out to Tara while in the car, but she will later reach out through other means that fit within the context of the story,

Tara removed the bullet from Bobby and still has it in her possession

Jax talked to her and told her he understood why she did what she did, also that he was sorry that being with him took her to that place.

With that said, I hope you enjoy :)

She reaches out and places her left hand on Bobby's forehead as he sleeps. She tries to gauge his temperature with her limited resources here in Piney's old cabin; she diligently watches him and checks over him. Any spike in his temperature could indicate a possible infection. She sits back in the wooden chair and looks around the room. The sun creeping through the windows is scattered by the film of dust coating it. Her thoughts wander from how ill of a place this is for Bobby to be recovering in, to the state of affairs with the people in her life.

With her husband. With Gemma. With the club.

She takes a deep breath and leans forward once again to check on Bobby. As she does so Juice enters the room holding a green mug filled with coffee.

"Hmm. Thank you." She says as she turns to take the cup from his hands.

"Sure. Need anything else?"

The sound of her phone ringing brings her attention to the brown leather purse forgotten on the hardwood floor. She turns to place the coffee filled mug on the oak bedside table to her left and bends over to pick up her bag.

As she places the purse in her lap, she turns her head in his direction and curtly nods with an, "I'm fine," in order to dismiss him.

"Okay. Let me know if you need anything else," he headed out the room without closing the door.

She fumbles through her purse to find the burner flip phone and pulls it out from underneath all the knick knacks littering her purse. She recognizes the number as her recently hired lawyer, Mitch Turner. For some reason, panic rises to her throat and she finds herself nervously looking over to the unconscious Bobby. Then glancing back in the direction in which Juice left.

She swiftly, but quietly rises out of the wooden chair and shuts the heavy green door slowly. Her attention darts back to Bobby, still unconscious, and she opens the phone, presses the green button and brings it to her ear.

"Hello," nervously slips out her mouth.

"Hi Tara, it's Mitch Turner. I have some good news, the DA who is prosecuting your case reached out to me this morning. She wants to meet and try to come up with some sort of arrangement to get you less time or none at all."

She brought her bandaged covered hand to her nose and pinched tightly, "I neither want nor need a deal. She already knows where I stand on this. My old lawyer and I spoke with her already."

"Tara, to be completely honest, this is not looking very good for you right now. You're running low on options here and she may be your best bet, if not your only one. Look, listen, how about we meet in person and talk this over. Eye to eye."

She took a deep breath in and slammed her eyes shut. Ratting. I can't. I won't.

"Tara. You still there?"

"Yeah Mitch. Okay I'll meet you over at . My office."

She began to tell him what time, when she noticed Bobby beginning to stir. His eyes fluttered open and he began to move his mouth.

"Look I have to go. Just, um… I'm on my way there now. Can you meet me now?"

"Sure. That's gr –" She shuts the phone mid- sentence on Mitch and pockets the phone as she walks over to the chair and sits.

She rests her forearms on her knees and leans forward. Bobby glances over in her direction, moans slowly escaping his lips.

"Hi. How are you feeling?"

"How do I look?"

The ability to be sarcastic is usually is good sign in her book.

"Like you've been shot."

Quiet and pain- filled laughs moved past his chapped lips

"Ooo. Shhh."

His tattooed right arm reached out and grabbed her right hand. His calloused hand entwined itself around it and squeezed as tightly as his sedated state allowed.

"Thanks Doc," slipped from his mouth before he fell back into unconsciousness. She smiles and leans back in her chair. She stares at the hand that just fell limp in hers and actively begins to think what her next move could do him. To all of them. Including herself and her sons.

Is this a hand that doesn't deserve punishment on some platform? If I go through with Patterson's offer, I'll be betraying all of them, on a certain level that should never be crossed in this world. But these are grown men, they can shoulder the weight of their sins, my sons, however should not have to bear that weight.

She grabs Bobby's arm, stands and places it on his rounded belly. She walks to the other side of the bed, her boots sounding off with each step. She maneuvers the sling a little to the left and checks Bobby's wound.

As she starts cleaning the wound, Bobby wakes once again.

"A doctor's work is never done, huh?" Bobby shifted upward on the bed using his good arm to help make the move.

"Careful, here let me help you." She reaches over and grabs three pillows from the end of the bed and situates them behind Bobby giving him a better position.

"Thanks again Doc, really appreciate it."

"No problem at all Bobby. A little food for thought though, next time you go to battle try wearing Kevlar shoulder pads. You have a nasty habit of getting shot it the shoulder because if I recall correctly about three years ago I patched you up for the same thing on the same shoulder."

She finishes off the comment with a loving smile, in which Bobby laughs and nods his head in agreement.

"Anyways, I'm gonna run to now. Pick up some supplies; we're running low on antiseptics and bandages." She walks over to the oak table parallel to the bed and picks up her cream colored leather jacket. As she shrugs it on she gazes out the window and looks at the four bikes parked outside next to her car that Gemma and Nero drove over last night. She sighs and prays that one of them won't be tailing her this time around.

"So doctor's orders until I get back include you staying in bed and resting."

She walks pass the chair holding his kutte and straight to the green door, looking back she leaves one last request, "And Bobby, no joints and absolutely no alcohol. It slows down your recovery."

"Well where's the fun it that?"

"The fun will be found when the alcohol thins your blood and you start to bleed again. It'll be a picnic basket filled with blood flavored fun. See ya later Bobby."

She walks down the hallway, filled with the scent of must, weed and cigarettes. Yup. Absolute fun.

She enters the dining room and scans the room. Juice is sitting on the couch that they made their make shift bed the night before. West and Rat are sitting adjacent to each other playing cards and drinking.

"Hey, I need some more supplies. I have to head back to St. Thomas."

Juice calmly shifts his head in her direction and nods.

"Rat will go with you."

Frustration and anger filled her bones. Seriously. You've got to be kidding me.

She walks forward, heading to the door, as she passes Juice she utters sarcastically, "Because I would be lost without him."

As she makes her way to the door, West calls out, "Anything we need to do for Bobby?"

"I don't know, how about not letting him die."

She turns back to Rat and West, "He'll be fine."

She beckons Rat with her index finger, her face painted with annoyance to find him still sitting, "Let's go."

When she opens her old office door, cold shock runs through her veins to see Gemma sitting on the desk.

"What are you doing here?"

Dangling her shades between two fingers, she smugly announces to Tara, "West told me you were coming by to pick up supplies. Figured I meet you at the scene of the crime."

As she turns to shut the door, Gemma stares at the blood staining the gray old carpet.

"Wow. How many dead babies does it take to ruin a carpet?" Gemma swiveled in Tara's direction as she threw her purse onto the desk.

"None. As it turns out. What do you want Gemma?"

Gemma slid off the table and rocked on her heels, "Wendy needs some anti-nausea scripts."

At the sound of Wendy's name she felt herself mentally rolling her eyes. Stupid, weak junkie. Can't believe I actually thought she could pull herself together long enough to actually pretend she could be mother.

"Hmmm. I'm sorry for Wendy, but I don't have the keys to the pharmacy." Gemma returned her snide comment with a pinned look.

I might as well go along, I need her out of here anyways.

"I can check the doctors' lounge for samples, otherwise, just pick up some emetrol for Mort's."

She turns away from Gemma and heads to her old file cabinet where she still keeps some of her documents. She opens the third drawer and prays Gemma takes the hint and leaves before her lawyer comes in.

"Okay. How's Bobby?"

"Oh, he's gonna be fine. I just need to get back up there. Pick up some files for my lawyer. And casually steal, from the hospital I no longer work for."

Gemma looked on with a smirk at Tara's new predicament and felt a sense of joy at the way Tara was taking everything in stride.

She glances back from the file cabinet to tell Gemma that she'll meet her downstairs in twenty minutes.

"Yes, ma'am."

Gemma opens the door and walks on out leaving the door gray door cracked.

As Gemma leaves, she stops fake shuffling through her file cabinet and closes the door behind her.

She sits in her old office chair just thinking as she waits for her lawyer. She thinks of her old life, when she wasn't being charged with conspiracy to commit murder. When she didn't fake a pregnancy and a miscarriage. When she still had her medical license to practice. It felt like the days of coming into this office and seeing baby pictures littering the wall and surgeries posted on her board were never coming back.

As she rocks back and forth in the chair, tapping her fingers on her lap to a beat she could only hear in her head, a knock sounds from the door.

"Come in." She sits up in her chair and scoots forward.

And the last person she ever expected to see walk into this room ever again…..does.

"West gave me a call. Told me you stopped by here to pick up some supplies. Thought I come down here give you a hand."

Jax stood in the doorway of the office, hesitating to walk in.

She couldn't look at him. At the very least, not in this room. She hears him walk further into room and pans her gaze to her hands that rest balled up on the desk.

"Well Rat came with me and your mother is downstairs waiting for me. I have more help than I thought I would ever get."

The sad tension that permeated the room broke both of their bleeding hearts. The realization that this is where their marriage has come to shore to hits in place they never saw coming. The silence and the guilt, however was too hard for Jax to take any longer.

As he started to move closer to Tara, the door was suddenly pushed open wider to reveal Tara's lawyer.

She brings her head up sharply and stares at Jax then Mitch.

"I'm sorry Tara. If I'm interrupting I'll gladly come back later." Mitch moves to leave the room, however Tara calls out to him to wait.

Jax stares at Tara with an unreadable expression plastered on his face as she stands from her chair.

"Is this the new lawyer?"

"Mitch Turner. He's representing me in the trial."

"You must be Jackson Teller. Nice to meet you sir." Mitch switches his briefcase to his left hand to place his hand in front of Jax in an effort to properly introduce himself.

She watches as Jax reluctantly breaks eye contact with her and shifts to his left to shake his hand in return. He moves pass Mitch and walks to the door, "I'll see you up there later, okay."

The guilt of really realizing what this meeting was about weighed heavy on her heart. I may not be on the same page as him as far as the boys and Charming goes, but I still do love him. Even though he… I can't. Ugh.

"Wait." She steps from behind the desk and moves to Mitch.

"We can have this meeting some other time. If anything, why don't we scratch this option off the table and go with what we have already."

"Tara, I strongly advise yo –"

She moves to the door and stands parallel to Jax in the mini carpeted hallway outside her old office.

"I'm sorry. I know you're hard pressed for time and I know this was the only moment you had to sit with me, but I really do have to go." She looked in Jax's direction; he was leaning against the wall with his hands hooked on his pockets. He was casting her a look that was once again unreadable.

"I have some business here, so you can head back up there. I'll be up there soon. Plus Rat and Gemma are here. I won't get lonely."

He moved away from the wall and took two steps toward her, his expression was no longer unreadable, it was plain as day. It was one filled with pain and anguish. He obviously wanted to get her alone to talk, but she was determined to avoid him like the plague.

His eyes met hers and to hold that gaze felt so easy yet so scary. Those eyes had the power to destroy her, just as hers had the power to make him unbelievably vulnerable.

"I'll relieve you of Gemma. Rat will stay and help you out."

She nods in reply and glances over at Mitch and nods. Jax gives a short, curt nod at the lawyer and walks down the hallway to leave the two of them alone.

She walks back into her office and picks her purse up from the center of the desk.

"Tell her my answer still remains the same. I'm not guilty and I'm not a rat." She walks pass Mitch shuts her door and leaves him standing there in a state of confusion.

She walks up the rocky steps of the cabin, behind her Rat closely follows with a white box filled of stolen medical goods. She turns the knob of the door and pushes it open. The first thing she sees is Jax leaning on the wall adjacent to the door. She watches him straighten up his legs and give her a longing look. Scattered hellos filled the room at her arrival. She then casts her gaze towards them to return the greeting and she stops on Bobby.

The doctor in her rises to the surface as well as frustration at the fact he ignored his previous warnings.

"Oh that's real good. Alcohol and opiates. You didn't hear a word I said did you, picnic basket filled with blood flavored fun, ring any bells?"

Bobby raised the hand holding the joint and waved it around.

"Next time I'll figure out how to casually steal a defibrillator as well."

She turns to Rat and takes the box of medical supplies from his hands and gives him a short thank you before placing it on her hip and walking over to the back room.

She makes her way to the table against the window and places the box down. She sharply turns, and tosses her bag down on the bed with an exhale. She brings her hand to her lip and plays with it in an act of nervousness. As she does so a black shadow is cast upon the door and she looks up to see Jax enter the room. Instinct has her swirling away from his gaze and nervousness leads her to fiddle with the box of supplies. She can't see him, but she hears the door shut quietly and realizes she can't keep avoiding him.

"Bobby looks better."

She sighs and starts unpacking the gauze, "He shouldn't be drinking."

"He knows."

She takes in one long and drawn out breath and turns to face him. She crosses one leg in front of the other and leans on the table. She takes him in and once again he's leaning back against something, this time the cabinet, with his hands hooked in his pockets. She tries to think of anything say, to make some sort of attempt to break this painful silence.

"You headed home after this?"

A quiet no makes it way pass his lips. "Got some stuff to clean up with the Irish. It's gonna be a late one for me."

She nods and looks down at her boots. She brings her right arm up and hooks it on her hip. He never averts his gaze, each time she looks up he's staring right at her, into her. It's like his eyes are trying to say sorry, trying to find a way back to the woman he loves. He refuses to bring his gaze anywhere else, "The boys staying with Gemma?"

He utters a simple yeah.

She looks away from him, a little peeved about her children being kept away from her, but she realizes it's not really him doing it.

"Go say goodnight if you want," has her raising her head and shaking it. She's not really in the mood to see Gemma, Nero, Unser or Wendy playing house with her children.

"No I should just stay here again. It's easier." She gives a slight nod in acquiesce.

"Okay."

They both just find themselves staring at each other.

In such a brief second she saw the vulnerability he always had towards her flash in his eyes. The love they felt for each other was still there, not like she ever really questioned it, but to see it so clearly in his eyes, hurt her on a molecular level.

"After your trial, we're gonna figure all this out."

Fear radiated in her skin and came through her eyes.

Could we really figure anything out anymore? Do I want to figure anything out to make us work? There's just so much pain between us now.

But seeing his eyes turn away from her for the first time since he entered the room snapped something inside her.

Something in her still wanted this man by her side, for what reason, who the hell knows. Maybe it's the familiarity. Maybe it's the history. Maybe because he's the only man she ever loved. Who knows? But seeing him turn and walk away pained her.

I just have to say it though, he may have contributed to where we are today, but so have I. And he hasn't heard it from me yet. He hasn't felt it from me.

She rushes over and grabs his elbow before he has a chance to get to the door knob. She pulls his body into hers and let his familiar scent wash over her. Despite the fact that he smokes avidly, he never seemed to just simply reek of it. Maybe it's because of the wind when he rides, but he always has an underlying scent of the breeze. After years of being wrapped it that scent, it gradually became her home; that scent to her was like a child's favorite blanket.

She wraps her left arm around his neck and her right swings around his back in a tight embrace. She nuzzles her face into his body when he pulls his hands out of his pockets. He wraps both his arms around her wholeheartedly and squeezes her body into his. It's as they're trying to imprint their bodies into one another.

She feels him lean the weight of his head on her shoulder and the bitter sting of tears well up at the bottom of her eyes.

A small, weak and pain-filled, "I'm sorry," whispered its way through her lips. And with that he took his left hand from her back and placed it on her head in an attempt to comfort her. Hearing that frail 'sorry' slip pass her mouth, broke his heart. Tears threatened to spill from his eyes and in an attempt to stave them off he dug his face into her shoulder and held on tightly.

She could feel herself losing to a battle to the tears so she slowly pulls her left arm from around his neck and places it on his shoulder with a slight nudge. She steps back and he releases the hold he as on her. She gazes up at his face while still in close contact and she she's the tears in his eyes.

She has to get out of here. She moves to head in the bathroom, anywhere but near him. She starts to move past the table and the bed and, all of a sudden, there's a pressure on her stomach. She looks down to see a glimpse of his right hand and in the next two seconds she finds herself spun around and his arms once again.

"Ja –"

"Shhh. Please. Just please give me this chance to hold you. Please."

Tears freely started to trail down face. She had so much resentment towards the man, but yet she found herself feeling sorry for him. After everything he put through her through, intentionally or not.

"To be perfectly honest with you Jax, I've been trying to figure out if the love we have for each is either sorely pathetic or severely romantic. I'm so hopelessly torn.

She feels his shoulders shake and feels a gust of air by her ear as he exhales with a quiet laugh.

"I think it's about pretty even in both corners."

He moves her head away from where it was resting on his chest and begins to delicately wipe away the tears staining her face. She keeps her eyes from making contact with his. She's reluctant to form or open that door to him at this moment. Not when there are so many things up in the air.

"I'm going to just wash my face," she steps back from him and finishes walking to the bathroom, as she shuts the door, she looks to him.

Silent tears made their way down his face just as it did hers. Unable to bear that sight she shuts the door and moves to the sink to throw some water on her face.

She takes the red hand towel off the shelf above the toilet and dries her face. She hears the door in the other room open and realizes that he's leaving the room. She turns the door knob and heads out after him.

She overhears him telling the guys that they should get going and that she's going to stay at the cabin as she walks down the hallway. She turns the corner and leans against the wall. As she looks up she finds Jax's gaze on her once again.

He stands back and lets the guys leave first, never breaking his stare. After Chibs, Tig, and Rat exits he gives her a quiet thank you and still doesn't dare break that eye contact until he closes the door behind him.

She shuts her eyes in an effort to cancel out those feelings starting to come to the surface again. As she does so she hears Bobby request more alcohol from West. She gives a mental sigh and pushes off the wall.

"Hey. You need to stop drinking and get back into bed."

"Yes dear."

With a nod, she moves forward and grabs his good hand, "Come on help me up with him."

When she secures the last piece of tape around the gauze, Bobby reaches out once again and pats her hand, "Thanks you so much sweetheart."

"You're welcome," she moves to collect the wrapping from the gauze scattered across the bed, "You need to stay in bed and get some rest."

"No problem."

She turns to toss all the trash in the waste bin and pulls the gloves off her hands to throw them out as well. She picks up her purse and moves to leave the room to let him get his much needed rest but before she get a chance to leave a "We love you Doc," fills the air.

Startled, she stops in her tracks. She stares and gives a smile accompanied to with nod. Before closing the door she faces him once more.

"It would be much easier if you didn't. That's for sure."

"He loves you darling. People tend to get lost on their own, but together they usually find their way. The right thing will settle in. It always does. Universe always has a funny way of making things right when they're thrown out of whack."

"Hmmm, well let's hope."

She opens and shuts the door. She walks into the dining room to find West asleep on the couch. The sound of her boots however wakes him and leads him to asking how Bobby is.

"He's resting. I'm just gonna wash up and do the same."

"Sounds like a plan." He returned to reading the forgotten book in his lap as walked over to the other room down the hall.

She opens it up and tosses down her bag on the bed. She follows the bag and collapses across it. She turns onto her stomach and buries her face into the bed. Sleep eventually takes over her before she has the chance to move up the bed or kick her shoes off.

Dreams of a much happier time evaded her thoughts and brought her back to a time when everything was so easy between them.

A/N: I hope you all enjoyed reading this. I know it's a long sucker, I wanted to actually break this into two chapters, but I just couldn't find the appropriate cut off.

The next chapters should be about half this word count or a little less. As for the story, Patterson and Jax's deal will be playing out in the next chapters. Repercussions of the restraining order, the fake miscarriage, the will from season 5, and the infidelity will all come back to play. Nothing is just gonna get smoothed over. There will be fights, arguments, love and hate and everything we love about this couple. The love did not die at all throughout season 6, it got lost for one and put aside for the other, and so I wanted to play out how they would find it again.