A/N: Came up with this last minute, hope you like it :)
Sheldon peered into the refrigerator looking for nothing in particular. He couldn't stop his mind from replaying the days events. Leslie Winkle had the nerve to saunter in his office waving her recently published research paper in his face.
Loop quantum gravity, really? Mad magazine must be in desperate need of material. Irritation spread across Sheldon's face, he was now going to have to work longer hours in order to get string theory back on top. Of all people, why Leslie Winkle?
He shut the refrigerator door harder than he had anticipated.
"Sheldon, did you hear what I said?"
Sheldon stared blankly back at Amy. He has yet to master the art of pretending to listen.
Unable to hide her annoyance Amy repeated,
"I said, if you keep a pair of bus pants in each of your prime locations, home, work and my place, if your ever in a situation where you need to take the bus you'll always be prepared."
Sheldon bit the side of his cheek. Oh yes, it was the cherry that topped off his day from hell. He had to ride the bus home without bus pants because Amy had to work late. Oh please, hanging out with a bunch of monkeys in a lab is hardly considered work. Tomfoolery would be a more suitable word.
Sheldon didn't bother to hide the exasperation in his voice,
"Is there anything else you want to nag me about?"
Amy felt a little taken aback, "Excuse me, I just worked a 13 hour day and instead of going straight home I came over here to check on you. I know how things are between you and Leslie Winkle."
Sheldon's jaw clenched, how dare Amy say that devil woman's name out loud.
Amy trying to ease tension in the room,
"Is there anything I can do for you? Do you want me to make you some tea? Or do you want some ice cream? Have you eaten? If not I can order something for you."
Sheldon put his head in his hands, "There you go again, nag, nag, nag. Question after question it just never ends."
Amy's stood quietly and looked up at the ceiling. It was the most she could do in that moment from preventing herself from strangling her boyfriend with her bare hands.
Sheldon continued his rant, "How would you like it if I assaulted you with a bunch of questions. Hey Amy, what did you have for lunch today? Hey Amy, how many green lights did you pass on the way here? Hey Amy, why do you have black laced panties in your top dresser drawer?"
Amy looked back at him in horror, "Ho do you..were you going through my things!?"
Sheldon rolled his eyes,
"Last week when you were in the shower I took the liberty of putting away your folded clothes that were sitting out on the dining room table. FYI, dresser drawers were invented as a place we put our clean clothes in and the dining room table was invented as a place to put our food on top of."
Why anyone would do a load of laundry, fold said laundry and just to leave it out in the open was beyond him.
Unable to keep his mouth shut he continued,
"Besides, who are those laced panties for anyways? I've lived across from Penny long enough to know that those are not to be worn in leisure but instead to be worn for someone."
Amy coming up with the first thing she could think of, "Your the genius, you figure it out!"
It was times like these where Sheldon didn't know if Amy was being literal or if she was mocking him.
"Why is it your business what I keep in my drawers anyways?"
Sheldon looked sternly at his girlfriend,
"This is tedious, you are allowed only one more question which I will answer and then we are going to have quiet time."
"Sheldon Cooper you are tap-dancing on my last nerve…"
"One more question", he repeated.
Amy thought for a moment as she continued to stare daggers into her boyfriend. How rude of him! I pay my taxes I can ask as many questions as I damn well please.
She smacked her lips before replying, "Fine, how big is your penis when it's erect?"
Sheldon's eyes grew wide and his cheeks started to blush as he stumbled to find words.
Amy couldn't help but feel a little satisfied with herself.
Sheldon's demeanor suddenly changed. He walked over to Amy and spoke in a softer voice,
"We shouldn't fight, I hate it when we do."
Sheldon leaned in closer to Amy and allowed himself to brush a strand of hair away from her face.
Almost in a trance Amy found herself agreeing and repeated his words,
"We shouldn't fight…"
Amy stared into her boyfriends eyes and out of instinct Amy slowly leaned closer their lips just millimeters apart…
"Good." Sheldon said as he stepped back from Amy and headed back towards the couch.
Amy stood there momentarily stunned, she realized she just fell for one of Sheldon Coopers sneaky tactics.
Amy grabbed her purse and headed to the door.
"Where are you going?"
"Im going to go home to watch Star Trek Into Darkness. Im also going to drool over Zachary Quinto as he's displayed across my TV screen in HD while I wear nothing but my black laced panties!"
Amy had one foot out the door while Sheldon trailed close behind.
"Star Trek! Now you're coming to your senses."
Sheldon grabbed his keys out of the bowl when suddenly he felt Amy's hands on his chest as she shoved him back into his apartment.
"Im going home to watch Star Trek by myself!"
By that point everything happened so quickly. Sheldon found himself standing in front of a closed door alone in his apartment.
"No way I'm being one-upped by a neurobiologist!"
Sheldon ran and opened the living room window as he waited for Amy to come around the side of the building to get to her car. Once he was able to see her he yelled down to her,
"Jokes on you Fowler, I own every season of Star Trek and every movie that has ever come out and I'm going to be having fun watching them all without you!"
Amy looked up at her boyfriend with a smirk and did what any normal girl would do, she lifted up her shirt and flashed him with her bare breasts.
Sheldon's eyes stared back unblinkingly before he came to his senses and quickly shut the window. His cheeks glowing red he slowly walked back to the living room.
"Vixen!"