Am I the answer

by DistantSong

~X~

It wasn't like she was searching for him.

Not that she'll admit it, though. She was never the one to state things she thought or felt so easily, so, it was expected from her, so predictable when she left her home this morning with no words uttered to her father, nor Shikamaru. She wandered aimlessly around the town, emotionless and numb. She heard them talk about the graveyard and stones, flowers and goodbyes, funeral and tears - people she knew and did not know, people she had never even seen.

"He was the greatest shinobi of all time." Woman wailed carrying a child. "So clever and king."

"He should have become Hokage in the days to come." Men whispered as she passed. "He had the will and character for it."

"They said he die without even being able to land a punch on his murderer's face!" Old ladies chatted, voices low and shaky. "Imagine how powerful our enemy is if one of our strongest was killed!"

"Oh, if only he was saved!"

Her legs betrayed her the moment the meaning of those words hit her - and she died a little, standing there as if stoned.

I could have saved him., she thought, remembering the hopelessness in Shikamaru's eyes. I could have saved us all. Her hands folded into fists. Asuma...

Heavy rain began to fall somewhere around the noon. People ran in all directions, pushing her, running into her - and not one man turned to shelter the broken girl left wandering. Ino feared to walk any further, she feared the direction her feet would carry her to - because Asuma...he was not the one she could stand seeing now. However, her legs moved, they bent and straightened, and as soon as she knew she was running.

Yamanaka ran through the heavy rain of feelings and regret.

I could have saved him, she chanted. Asuma-sensei...could've been with us. If only I could save him. If only I could-

Minutes, perhaps hours later, she found herself standing at his door. Bewildered, she stared at the hard wooden doors as if she had never seen them in her life. Ino knew they were his and she knew he was the one she had been looking for all this time, but the woman just couldn't bring herself to utter his name. His face remained carved in her retinas - and her mind was gone, all senses died and for a moment she believed she wasn't able to remember, however...There was no stopping to tears.

She laid a hand on the wood. It shouldn't have been this way, not under this circumstances, yet, she was too weak to resist her own devious needs. She stayed there long enough to freeze in the wind and no one answered, no one opened the doors she always believed would be open, no one welcomed her with open arms.

Her fist slammed against the wall. She cursed him under her breath.

Girl was about to turn and run away from it again when a firm hand wrapped itself around her shoulders, pulling her back. He pressed her back to his chest and held her in his arms when thunders shook the ground and she cried, flustered and afraid.

He had sheltered her from the rain the way Shikamaru should have done when she faced Asuma's death.

Lightning ripped through the sky and she jerked like a child. He held her tight, tighter and the tightest until she trembled no more. The smell of cigarettes and spring rain hazed her mind - and suddenly, there was no stopping to tears.

"Asuma!"she screamed when a flash murdered the shadows that splintered her into thousand puzzle pieces. Her knees tottered while she held onto him like he was everything she had left. "Asuma is gone!" It was an accusation, Kakashi knew.

"I couldn't..." She gritted her teeth and dug nails into his forearm just under her neck. "I couldn't save him!" Her tone concealed not her disdain and anguish. "If Sakura was there, if that was you in his place...you wouldn't die."

He led her inside without another word being said, with his free arm he closed the door without ever looking over his shoulder. He hid their embarrassment, their despicable weakness.

She untangled herself from his grip and took a step further in, her careful blue orbs scanned the territory yet unknown to her, and he gave a laugh, thinking how Asuma had taught her well. Still, he couldn't understand the reason behind her arrival. She studied his little apartment as if it was a hunter and not him - why he of all people? She had Shikamaru, the boy who loved her with all his being. She had Choji, even though he doubted she had ever looked at him that way, but hell, she had Kiba, a boy under whose touch every girl melted, and yet she chose him, a man exactly her sensei's age. The thought instilled a glimmer of doubt in his mind; perhaps this girl had seen Asuma in a way none of them ever dared to think about, especially not him. He loved the girl, Kakashi recalled, he loved her as if he was his own, but not once did he think of her in such way. And then, there was his answer. Ino wasn't stupid and nothing she done wasn't carefully planned, she was way more clever than he could imagine.

Shikamaru drowned his sorrow in tears and memories, shogi and go. Choji cried day and night before the stone and Ino hated that useless memento more than anything. He remembered how she gazed at Kurenai when the woman cried clutching it so tight as if it was the man she loved indeed. Like him, the girl knew Asuma wanted nothing like that, but a simple ceremony with his name written in a stone on his favorite place where sun never died. 'He deserved so much more', she had hissed at the Fifth with every emotion she held inside. Yet, nothing she said mirrored what she felt. None of the could see because none of them felt the same way. None of them.

Except him.

He had felt it, not once, but twice. He left a comrade to die - It had to be done, he muttered the words into his pillow every night he closed his eyes. I had to save us. He loved her. He understood. However, the fault was his and an innocent boy died, still too young. But the pain was even greater when he had lost her too, the one he had promised to protect.

Her blood still paints his hands, no matter how many times he washes them it is still there. He blessed kami, knowing she doesn't carry such a burden.

Ino is only painted in guilt and regret.

She cleared her throat. Her shoulders were stooped and she observed him carefully with the eyes of a doe. He couldn't contain the thought how strikingly beautiful she was even in those black clothes and hair glued to her face. Kakashi understood Shikamaru so well, but, to the boy she was much more than just that.

He eyed her with understanding. Her gaze told him she was afraid, terrified, but not embarrassed. Nevertheless, not once did she reconsider her decision when he crossed the room to claim her, none of them wondered if this was wrong.

She felt his arms wrap around her lithe body, he pulled her close, closer, pressing their chest together. He took a moment to admire her again, how beautiful and utterly scared she was. But Ino knew he was there. And he'll make it easier. He'll make it easier, with one look he promised.

He pulled the soft fabric that hid his face from the world's gaze and before she could take a look at him, their lips met.

He forced his tongue into her mouth. She couldn't do anything, she couldn't push him away even if she wanted. His grip was so tight around her waist, but she noticed when one of his hands trailed off under her shirt, up, right to her left breast. He squeezed it, making her moan into the kiss, and he gave a small laugh.

His other hand went missing inside her panties. His fingers trailed across her soft skin, so soft he thought she was a mere illusion, soon to perish. But as he found her clitoris and softly ran his finger over it, just to tease with her, her moan was enough to disrobe him of any doubt. She ran her fingers through his hair, pulling one single white strand, pleading for more. He pushed their bodies towards the commode, where a picture of the girl he had once cared for still remained. But Ino pushed it down - it shattered in million pieces, forgotten for a moment - as he pushed her to sit on it, and made her spread her long lithe legs. His left hand found a way out of her shirt, squeezing her nipple goodbye. She shivered when his fingers tickled her abdomen and he pushed a hand in her pants.

With one hand he continued running fingers over her clitoris, while the finger of his other hand entered her. The sound she made was something between a cry of pleasure and moan of pain. The girl liked it more than he could imagine, she brushed her lips against his ear asking for more, more and more…And he gave her more.

At first he went slow - in and out, in and out - but as her breathing slowed, he decided to make it less easier. His other finger slid in with ease and she screamed, half-jumping on the commode. He buried his head into her neck and sucked it. She tasted like regret and smelled of summer and variety of flowers, only one of them known to him. A rose; one with myriad thorns.

He went faster. Faster and faster with each second. All he could hear were her moans, words uttered under breath. He moved his face away from her neck just to see a perfectly round, purple mark on her creamy skin. A piece of art. He proceeded down her neck, licking it as tenderly as he could, and stopping on her cleavage, softly teasing her breast with his tongue. His third finger came in. Her legs pushed him harder against her, in her. He took some time to play around with her, sucking her nipples over her shirt and biting her breasts, but it wasn't enough. He wanted her naked, bare, her C-cups in his hands. Just her, no one else. And Ino wanted him the same way.

So he left her wondering.

He pulled his fingers out of her body, leaving her not enough time to even complain, and pushed them inside her shirt, grabbing her breast. Kakashi could not remember the last time he ever held one, so he moaned against her skin as he felt them in his hands. He caressed them the gentlest he could, her breathing slowed a little. Kakashi placed butterfly kisses on the fabric of her shirt, around her hardened nipple, teasing it, and when he estimated the time was right he took it in his mouth, not caring for the cloth. Ino jolted, her nails digging into his shirt. He hissed in pain, and to punish her, he bit her nipple in return. She cursed him under breath and pleaded for more. His cock rose when she began to move between his hips, intentionally or unintentionally, he didn't care. He wanted her, but his urge to explore her was far greater.

He pulled his hands out and parted from her for a fraction of second. He grabbed the fabric of her shirt and violently pulled it - her eyes were wide with astonishment, although she groaned. He tore the shirt apart and she hurried to take off his own, so he leaned in, kissing her, wrestling with her tongue outside their mouths. She shuddered when he proceeded down, to lick her breasts, one by one. His tongue circled around her nipple, feeling it's hard surface that felt so good against his tongue. He sucked it in, with no barrier in between. She moved her body, driven by passion. His tongue wrestled her nipple enjoying the song of her calls, moans and groans. Ino was wet, in paradise, sure she was given a taste of heaven.

Kakashi kissed her between her breasts, softly, lovingly, before he stopped for a moment to calm his unsteady breathing. He closed his eyes and buried his head between her breasts. She hugged his head, kissing his hair, pressing him more into herself, telling him she wanted him now, right now. He moved again, after couple seconds, softly kissing her right breast. She smiled. Then his hands, which were resting on her slim waist, made their way to her pants for the second time. Just this time…this time he took them off, both her skirt and underwear in one fierce movement. Her hands cooperated, and she took off his belt and pushed down his pants. He simply stepped out of them, both, and grabbed her legs. They encircled his waist and he carried her away from commode to the free place on the wall. He pushed her against it, causing her to scream a little, feeling its coldness, its rugged structure. But it was all gone as soon as it awoke, for the pain and pleasure washed over her as Kakashi entered her.

He entered her. Hard. Painful. He pushed until the end, almost reaching her limit. She screamed so hard and called out his name, just his name without sensei or anything else. Kakashi fought the urge to cover her mouth as she cried so hard, he even waited a moment, but her kiss told him ending this was not an option. So, he pushed harder and Ino moved, responding to him like they have been entwined like this hundred times before the moment. She screamed and shouted, gasping for breath after every move he made, and he was no better. He kissed her breasts so violently, bit her neck, licked almost every part of her skin. He dig his nails into the delicate skin of her tights, right before he pushed his cock until the very end. She moaned, eyes wide, calling out all the gods. He filled her in and pushed one more time just to hear he scream. Kakashi waited until she was completely filled and when he finished, he pulled his member out, allowing her couple of minutes of silence and recovery. They both gasped for breath, entwined like snakes.

„More…"she uttered against his neck, smelling of fuck and sweat. „More…" He nodded at her pleads and he kissed her once more, fiercer than before. His tongue licked its way down her whole body. Her legs fell from his waist and toes touched the floor, he made his way past her tummy stopping to tease her belly button. She moaned, her hands pushing his head lower, and lower, until he reached her pussy.

He licked her clit, just to make her suffer a little. Yamanaka gasped instantly, pushing his head even more between her thighs. He smiled, and opened his mouth.

He tasted her ; for the first and maybe not the last time. She tasted so delicate, so lovely, like a woman as good as her should, even better than he had ever imagined. He played with her clit, circling around it, and with every move she grew weaker and weaker, until her legs spread enough to grant him full access to the area. His tongue slid in every part of her, leaving nothing unexplored. He pushed a finger inside her, not too deep nor, just enough for her to enjoy. He spread her vagina to have a better access to her - and God, Ino never felt any better. He licked her slowly, almost lovingly, then fiercely, then hard and then fast - god, he licked her in every way possible. He even kissed her. He kissed her as those were he lips indeed.

Her embarrassment died away when she was explored completely, when nothing remained hidden from him. After she reached her climax and he wiped it away with his shirt, he continued kissing her there, then touching her breast, her bare body, caressing her, and she continued playing with him, kissing him, and gave him a little gift - two gifts.

Her hand grabbed his already aroused member. She teased it with some slow movements, satisfied with the angry look on his face. He tried to kiss her but she backed away not once letting go of him. And soon, as he gave into her touch and his face rested in the crook of her neck, she moved her hands faster. He uttered her name as he slowly kissed her skin, his lips curved in a smile when she almost pushed him to his limit - and Ino, as if knowing, let go of him right before he came. Kakashi looked at her, but she was already gone, tracing kisses down his neck. She sucked it in until a purple mark was left. Her hands explored him accompanied by her lips in a bit slower motion. She stopped to tease each of his nipples and heard him curse her out loud. Ino simply laughed.

Kakashi saw through her plans only when she knelt - and took him in her mouth. The man moaned as loud as he could and felt ashamed the instant after, the girl had made him weak. She teased its head with her tongue before taking it in, completely. Ino was surprised at how big it was, way bigger than it felt when she had it inside herself. Her lips worked so good with it, her teeth would brush against it here and there. Her breasts brushed against his knees almost every time she moved and he loved it, he loved every move she made.

He reached his climax inside her mouth and she drank it all, so hastily he had to suppress a laugh. The girl had been a virgin, physically, but not mentally. Her mind was the dirtiest place he had ever met.

It was late, almost midnight, when he filled her in for the second time, making her smile. Ichikaru ramen had closed and Kakashi thought about Naruto heading home. Everyone was probably home, he corrected himself, Everyone, except her.

Yamanaka Ino laid on the floor in the hands of a man who eased her sorrow and made her feel protected the way she never did. She laid in his hands watching his peaceful face, his right eye watching her in return. She smiled at his questioning look, her finger playing around his face, touching its contours, making him smile. There was something in his eyes, some kind of gratitude, something he couldn't show nor he could hide, but the girl seemed to notice it anyway. Her eyes had the same gleam.

Ino watched him, in wonder. The girl imagined the face behind the mask, the lips that kissed her and had her in so many ways. She wanted to see him without it, to really see him like he had seen her, with no mask, bare. The sight of that mask on his face made her feel like he wasn't hers completely, like he hadn't given in the way she wanted him to do. And that was why her pale index finger pushed the soft fabric away. Kakashi did not protest.

The man she saw was beautiful, it matched the picture she always carried in her mind. She traced the line of his scar from the left eye to his thin lips, her fingertips brushing slowly against them. Kakashi studied her with both his red and coal eye and she laid back in his arms and kissed his neck. He pulled her closer.

Yamanaka Ino was the first and the last person to see him without his mask.

It was their little secret, and the moments they shared, feeling loved. He held her like he had held no woman before her and she pressed herself tight to him like she never did with any boy. No words were spoken, everything they felt was expressed with deeds.

Ino left in the morning, kissing him for the last time. It was sweet as it was bitter, and for a moment Ino wished she didn't have to leave. However, she left his apartment like nothing ever happened, without feelings chaned.

Yamanaka Ino regretted nothing, and as the man watched her leave with hair of the golden morning, Kakashi prayed Asuma to forgive him for he broke yet another promise.

A woman like her...is worth it all, Hatake Kakashi thought as he closed his door.