Rowan stood outside of the small church, its stone facade crammed in between two modern skyscrapers, and checked the address again on the flyer he'd brought with him.

This had to be the place.

But a church? Why'd it have to be in a church?

As he stood there, feeling close to fleeing at a run from the property, a couple approached, hand in hand, and smiled at him before taking the steps up to the large arched wooden door. Before entering, the lady looked back.

"Are you here for the meeting?" she asked, a bright smile on her face.

He shrugged, and folded the flyer in his hand. "I'm just looking around," he said lamely, and wished they'd continue on so he could vacillate in peace then leave.

"Oh," she said, and gave a knowing grin. "Well, you should look around inside, it's much more interesting." With that she came back down the steps and took him by the hand.

As she tried to lead him up the steps, he leaned back. "I was just... it's for a friend... wasn't really going to," he warbled, gesturing back towards where he'd been standing.

The girl smiled brightly as she drew him up the steps, and patted him gently on the hand.

"It's your first time, I get it," she said reassuringly, "Just give it a try, you'll be happy you did, right Ben?"

The guy who'd been following nodded, "Yeah. I was skeptical at first, thought it was a joke. But this lady, she knows what she's doing." He grinned, and continued talking as they made their way through the dimly lit vestibule to the back of the church, "The nightmares have almost stopped, and I just feel, I dunno, lighter, I guess. I'm not carrying around as much... guilt?"

Rowan raised an eyebrow. Why did they sound like a cult? "That's great, but I-"

"Here we are!" The lady said in a bright tone as they turned down a hallway and through a doorway into a well-lit community hall peppered with motivational posters. Rowan had a moment to absorb the fact that there were about twenty people seated on metal chairs in a large circle in the middle of the room, before the lady drew him in further.

Aw crap. There were so many! He didn't want to be here, why'd he come? What if M found out? He'd never hear the end of it!

"Hey everyone, I've got someone new, he's a little shy about being here," she said in a bubbly voice.

Seriously? Rowan felt his face burn, and looked down as people started to turn in their seats.

"But I know he's going to be really happy he came, so lets give..." she leaned over to him, "I'm sorry, I didn't get your name?"

Noise built up steadily around them, the murmurs and whispers from the group, and many of those who'd turned around actually gasped out loud.

Oh shit.

"Maggie, do you know who that is?" one of the gathered said in an awed tone, and Rowan started to wish he could crawl under a nearby desk and hide.

This was why he'd avoided this so far. This was why he spent as little time as possible in the common area of his apartment complex. Why he kept his head down when he walked the streets.

"No, I don't Bob, who is it?" Maggie turned back to stare at him in surprise.

"R?!"

Rowan's jaw dropped as he turned to see the owner of the very familiar voice, jerking up from a chair.

"M?!"

His friend was staring at him, his almost bare head no longer marred by the large scars he'd sported as a corpse, his skin a little flushed in embarrassment.

"What are you doing here?!" they both asked each other, in perfect unison.

"Uh..." they both said again, in almost perfect unison, as they looked awkwardly around, trying to come up with an excuse for being at a support group for the once-dead.

"Shit," R muttered.

"Crap," M said with a smirk.

Maggie's eyes were popping open. "You're R?! You're him?"

Rowan winced.

"Oh my god! I've been wanting to meet you ever since I heard the stories! Ben and I, we're new to the city, in a complex outside of the old wall, along with a bunch of folks they've been bussing here for the cure... god, they'll be amazed... I never thought I'd actually meet you! Is Julie here? Is she coming?"

Oh god. Help.

"Did you know they're talking about putting up a statue? I think it's-"

"Maggie," M butted in, walking over to them, "You're a sweetheart, and don't take this the wrong way, but I'm going to rescue my friend now."

"Oh. Oh..." she giggled and blushed, watching R with bright eyes as M took him by the arm and lead him to the circle, pulling over an empty chair.

Almost everyone was staring at him in varying degrees of wonder and admiration as he took his seat. It made him want to pull his shirt over his head, and he sank back, drawing his arms around himself tightly. Some of the people he recognized from his apartment complex, and one lady in particular from his outburst a couple of months ago. She was smiling warmly his way, and he returned it weakly.

Then he leaned into M. "A joke, you said. These meetings were a joke, and only good for 'people who couldn't pee without getting permission first' I think were your exact words."

"Say that louder, that'll go over great," M muttered back. "Also, your response was 'yeah'. As in, you agreed. So why are you here?"

Rowan gave a short bark of a laugh, "Don't turn this back on me!" he cried, grinning at his friend. "Have you finished the sad tale of your dick yet, or do I need to pull out the violin for the next installment?"

M burst out laughing, then coughed as he caught the stares of many of the group. Looking at R, he smirked. "I came here because I was having some trouble, believe it or not." His face grew serious, a rare sight for Rowan. "It's really helped. This lady isn't a quack, she's not some fluffy granola hippie weirdo. She's real, she's been there, and she helps people like us cope."

Rowan blinked, a little astounded by his friend's sincerity. Also by the use of the term 'fluffy granola hippie weirdo'.

"What have you got against fluffy things?" he asked, trying in make his friend smile.

"I'm being serious," M said, and drew his arms across his chest.

"Sorry," Rowan said quickly, "I just... I'm not used to seeing you like this. You're always cracking jokes. I had no idea things were bad."

M shrugged, sighing dramatically. "Yeah, well... I am a fragile butterfly at heart."

Rowan snorted. Back to regular M. He looked around the group. Some were still studying him, others had turned to their neighbors and were deep in conversation. "So, how does this work? Someone just start talking? Which one of these is the lady?"

M shook his head. "She's not here yet. Happens sometimes, she has a practice outside of this I think."

"Huh," Rowan grunted. "I wonder if she's the same lady who sent two crazies to my door a week back."

"What?"

"Don't ask."

"Okay..." M said slowly, giving him a look. "So why are you here?"

Rowan smirked. "I wanted to be adored by my people. Their worship gives me str-OW!" He jerked back with a yelp as M kicked him in the leg.

"I'm kidding!"

"Well don't, not with this group."

Rowan sighed. "I just wanted to see what it was like. Julie wanted me to try it too."

M made a whip noise, flicking his wrist.

Rolling his eyes, Rowan shoved M over. "It's not like that. I had... a bad time. Really bad. I almost... well, it was bad. She thought this might help, though I think I found a way to help myself." He shrugged and left it at that.

His friend stared at him, his brown eyes tight with concern, then grasped R's shoulder and squeezed, shaking him lightly.

Rowan nodded, looking down at his hands. "Thanks." Then smirked as M kept shaking him, and finally looked up at his friend, grinning. "Really? How long are we doing this?"

"As long as it takes baby!" M said with a grin, and they both fell into laughter.

"I'm sorry I'm late everyone," came a soft, slightly accented voice from the doorway behind R, and a figure with long black hair moved around the circle to the far side.

R looked down at his hands again, a little nervous. He had no idea what to expect, he'd never been to anything like this before. Would he have to talk? What if he had nothing to say? What if he said something stupid? How could he talk about what he'd done? He looked up and stared at the other people around him, knowing they'd been where he'd been, had killed just like he had, but it was strange. They all looked so normal. So human.

Just like me.

The lady had her back to him, and was rooting through her bag for something as the rest of the group waited patiently. He tried to work out the nationality he'd heard from her accent, something Middle Eastern? European? It was light, but definitely there. There was something familiar about it, but he couldn't quite place what.

"I hope everyone had a good week," she said as she pulled out a folder and a pen.

There were murmurs and confirmations from the group, people smiling and nodding, but one man to R's left, about half way around the circle, looked like he was about to cry.

R stared at him, not meaning to, but unable to help it. Was that going to happen? Was he supposed to cry in front of people? Was that the point?

Jesus, I need to get out of here!

He twisted towards M, and tried to work out a plan to stand and somehow climb over the chair without looking like an idiot and falling over.

"Oh no you don't," M said quietly, and put a steadying hand on his arm, "You're here now, just stay for one, see how it goes."

"But... there's crying!" R whispered frantically, as the guy to his left burst into tears.

M smirked. "Yeah, that happens. Particularly with that guy. Can't turn that tap off." Then he smiled. "I've done it myself R. Felt good."

Rowan stared at his friend, wide eyed. That was not something he'd expected. M started looking a little uncomfortable with the attention, so Rowan changed gears. "You have tear ducts?"

Grinning, he brought his arms up to defend himself as M elbowed him.

"Okay everyone," the leader's warm voice drifted over the group, "who'd like... to..."

The lady's voice petered off oddly, and R looked over, but he didn't get a chance to see her as she'd quickly raised a blue manila folder in front of her face.

"I would Amala!" Maggie said perkily, looking his way.

On no.

"We have a very special guest today," she continued, beaming brightly as she gestured his way, "I brought him in you know. It's R, Amala, the one who changed everything!"

At that, the entire group clapped, smiling his way, all save the lady and the guy who hadn't stopped crying since they started. With a weak smile, Rowan sank lower in his chair, shooting a dirty look at M as his friend snickered beside him.

The clapping died away, and everyone slowly turned to the lady, who was still holding the folder up. The stiff card was crimping under her grip.

The woman cleared her throat and moved the folder slightly, enough to look over it at the group, though her head was tilted and her hair covered her eyes.

"That's.. great Maggie.." she said and cleared her throat again, "Welcome R, it's... good to have you here."

This was the lady everyone raved about? She seemed a little weird.

"Amala," the crying man suddenly piped up, sniffing thickly, "I need to talk about something, I had a bad-"

The woman interrupted him, "Yes, you usually do Roger..."

Everyone in the group turned to look at her with varying expressions of surprise. Even Roger had stopped crying and was just staring at her with his mouth open.

The leader coughed again, "I'm sorry, I did not mean it that way... forgive me everyone, I seem to be getting a cold." With that she bent forward, plucking a massive wad of tissues from her bag, which she promptly placed over her mouth, her nose, and the majority of her face as she dropped the folder to the ground.

Rowan almost laughed out loud, but stifled it as M nudged him in the side. This lady was cracking him up.

"Do continue Roger," she finally offered, and Roger did indeed continue, launching into a painful recollection of how spreading peanut butter on his sandwich that morning had brought up the stolen memories of a boy he'd killed in an abandoned subway tunnel.

Rowan listened, and it surprised him, the chord Roger's tale struck inside. The guy had a right to cry. It was horrible. But no more horrible than anything R himself had done, and he suddenly realized that maybe he'd done the right thing coming here.

Everyone nodded and murmured sympathy and encouragement throughout Roger's story, and he broke down even more, then seemed to exhaust his tears and grew quiet.

"Thank you for sharing Roger," the lady said, her voice a little muffled by the bunch of tissues over her face.

She turned away and looked over the entire group for a long moment. "We have a slightly different format today, friends. I hope you will not mind."

The people around the circle raised eyebrows, shrugged, smiled, and generally assured her that they did not mind, and she nodded back.

"Good. Today I am looking for your feelings about something we have not explored before. Something few of us have experienced, but something worth sharing, that may lead to surprising revelations."

Everyone waited patiently for her to continue, as Rowan stared at her, trying to work out why her voice was niggling his brain. The fact that she still had tissues over her face was driving him nuts, but he figured she just didn't want anyone to catch what she had.

That actually made him giggle. Someone worried about infection in a group of people who used to be zombies.

"I wish to ask you all, what would you say to the person who bit you, to the person who infected you, if you had a chance to meet them?"

Murmurs and muttering broke out in the group, and Maggie giggled.

"Would you be angry? Would you be afraid? What would you," the lady nodded her head towards Rowan, "say to that person?"

Maggie raised her hand as Rowan pointed to himself, wondering if the woman had meant for him to go first. But Maggie quickly broke into another giggle, and grasped her partner's hand tightly.

"I married mine!" she blurted out, and leaned over to give Ben a little kiss.

Ben smiled and looked down at their clasped hands before nodding to the group, "It's true."

Almost everyone in the group was looking at them in stunned silence, including the lady, who'd dropped her tissues slightly. Rowan stared at her profile, feeling something he couldn't quite put a name to.

"I killed the little shit who bit me," M said suddenly.

Rowan turned to stare at his friend, completely surprised. M had never shared anything about his turning with him.

M had everyone's attention, so he shrugged and continued. "Yeah, I was in the airport john, doing my best imitation of a cherubic fountain, when this dumbass frat kid shuffled in and jumped me." M shook his head, "I had no idea what was going on, ended up braining him with a toilet seat. But not before he banged my head against the mirror and bit me."

M laughed suddenly, and a couple of people actually jerked in their seats. "I guess if he was in front of me right now, I'd ask him how the fuck he managed that, since I made sure to flush."

An elderly woman a few seats over from M was looking at him with such utter disgust that Rowan snorted out loud, then quickly gathered himself.

"Marcus," Amala said with a weary sigh, tissues firmly restored, "I have to remind you again of your language."

M smirked. "Sorry Amala."

"I wish I had the bastard in front of me, I'd kill him!" someone yelled to their right, and all heads turned to the source, a short man with glasses wearing a sweater vest. "Corpse killed my chihuahua! Poor Nessie was just trying to protect me... the bastard!"

The man grew silent and said nothing more, and R just shook his head, wondering if insanity was catching.

Turning back to the lady, he saw she was staring directly at him.

"Thank you Oliver," she said, glancing to the vested man before nodding back at R, "I would like to give our newest member a chance to weigh in now. R, what would you do?"

The sudden attention made him feel distinctly uncomfortable, and he shifted a little anxiously in his seat.

"You're among friends R, please, whatever is on your mind."

"Um... well," he started, feeling his cheeks starting to burn. "I'm not sure."

Someone else raised their hand.

The lady gestured for them to lower it, and stayed focused on Rowan. "Please continue."

Rowan took a deep breath. What would he do? Jesus, just the thought of it stirred something angry inside, something that wanted to rant and rave about what being dead had stolen from him. But the more he thought about it, the more he realized that there was so much more he would say.

"I'd be angry I think, at first. Maybe enough to start swinging," he said quietly, and the lady nodded slowly. "But... I think..." He took another deep breath. "I think I'd actually say... thank you."

The entire room around him seemed to gasp, and even M gave him a funny look. A couple of people repeated the words in astonishment.

"Thank you? Why the hell would you say that?" a lady with dark skin muttered around the circle to his right.

Another guy with long hair sitting opposite Rowan laughed out loud, and kept laughing, until Amala gave him a look.

"I want to remind everyone that this is a non-judgmental environment," she said, "Let's give R the space to speak."

She turned back to him. "Why would you say thank you, R?"

Rowan started to shrug, then stopped himself. Enough shrugging.

"Because, if she hadn't bitten me, my family and I would have been evacuated."

Amala's brow dipped. "Wouldn't that have been a good thing?"

"Maybe. But I'm not even sure the plane made it to its destination. I'm not sure if where it was going was safe."

She nodded, "I see. But surely that was a better option than dying and living now with the deaths of so many?"

Rowan frowned, then shook his head. "No, it's not."

"Why?" Amala asked, and there was something about the way she needed the answer that made R stare at her for a long moment. She coughed into the tissues and shifted in her seat. "Why not? Why, after everything, would you say thank you?"

Rowan released a heavy breath.

"Because of her, my family stayed here, and they helped build a wall that kept thousands of people safe. In doing so, they stayed safe, and we're back together again. Because of her, I saved a man's life with the memories I took as a corpse, and I'm using that knowledge at the hospital to help more people every day."

Rowan smiled. "Because of her, I met Julie, and because of her, I fell so deeply in love that I came back to life, and somehow... I dragged the rest of the world up with me."

The room had gone completely quiet around him.

"So I'd look that person in the eye," Rowan added, "and I'd say thank you."

As he finished, R realized he felt really good. Thinking about this had given him some perspective he'd never had before. M was right, this lady knew what she was doing.

A member of the circle on the far side from Rowan started to clap, and slowly it spread until everyone, including M, was applauding what he'd said.

Everyone but Amala.

Who was crying.

"Amala? Are you okay?" Maggie asked, with a look of shock on her face. Rowan guessed this wasn't something that happened very often.

Amala nodded and slowly gathered herself.

"Thank you for sharing, R," she said quietly, her gaze lowered. "It was... very good to hear." Then she looked up and around the group. "I'm going to have to end tonight's session a little early tonight everyone, I apologize. We'll meet back here next week at the same time, yes?"

The group hesitated at first, with the members looking back and forth at each other shrugging, before a few stood to leave, followed by the bulk of the circle. A few stragglers went to talk to Amala but she apologized to them and waved them off as she gathered her things.

"Huh," M grunted. "Whaddya know."

Rowan shrugged and looked over at M. "Guess we should go."

M stared at him with a strange smile on his face.

"What?" R asked. "You were right by the way, she's good. That felt really good."

"That's good," M said, then he smirked. "Seriously? You don't know?"

Rowan frowned at his friend, "Know what?"

"Wow."

"What?!"

M looked at Amala, and back at Rowan.

Rowan looked at Amala, who seemed to be having problems shaking the last member of the group. Her back was turned to him.

He looked back at M and smirked. "You're being weird. Come on, I'd like to catch up with Julie."

"Let's wait just a few more minutes," M said, stretching back in his seat, propping his hands behind his head. "I have something to say to Amala."

Rowan watched as she waved the last straggler off. "I don't think she wants to see anybody else M."

"Oh, I think she'll want to hear what I have to say."

As the leader pulled her bag to her shoulder and rose to her feet, M leaned forward in his chair, calling out to her, "Amala."

She did not turn, but adjusted the clasp of her bag. "Marcus, I really must get home, and I have to lock up, so if you could please-"

"You should tell him," M said softly.

Rowan looked at M, confused. "Tell me what?"

M shook his head and laughed. "You could've eaten his brain after all Amala, I don't think it would have mattered."

"M, what the hell?" Rowan sputtered, offended. What was M's problem? Why would he say something... like...

"Oh Marcus," Amala said with a sigh, and dropped her bag to the floor.

Rowan's mouth slowly fell open as he started putting the pieces together. The choice of topic, the tissues, Amala's need to hear him speak, her crying...

"Holy shit," he whispered, staring at the back of her head, eyes widening as his heart began to race.

"Kapow! There we go!" M cried out, and sat back again. "Now where's the popcorn?"

Amala sighed again, raising her head as she squared her shoulders. "Marcus, you are such a child."

"I wasn't the one hiding behind a faceful of tissues all night, Amala," M shot back, then his tone softened. "You didn't have to you know, Rowan's a good kid."

"I know that," she said quietly. "But I did not want to scare him." Turning around, her big brown eyes met Rowan's.

The moment he saw them, framed in the same face he'd seen eight years ago, Rowan felt like he'd been punched, harder than when Evan had broken his nose, and stared in utter shock at the woman who'd turned him into a corpse.

M had been watching with a big grin on his face, but it began to fade as Rowan's breath started coming too hard and too fast.

"You see?" Amala sighed.

"Hey, buddy, relax," his friend said, grasping his shoulder, "That was ages ago."

Reality, memory and dream collided in his head as he fought to breathe, part of him clinically understanding he was having a panic attack, another part too busy reliving the past in vivid, horrible detail. She was the woman from his nightmare vision in the hospital, alive, slowly turning into the boney, she was the blood drenched monster who'd killed a man right in front of him on the bus, whose silver eyes were so knowing as she bit him. As she took everything he had...

shitshitshit

Amala took a step towards him, raising her hand. "R... you are fine, I'm not-"

R jerked back the moment she took the step, his chair scraping loudly against the floor, and watched her face fall as he fought to control himself, still feeling completely overwhelmed. Why couldn't he get a decent breath? Jesus, he was staring to get dizzy!

God, am I going to faint?!

"Whoa, R..." M said, alarmed and reaching for him again, "Calm down man, everything's okay!"

Squeezing his eyes shut, Rowan tried to ride it out, still cornered by the ghosts of the past, but desperate to steady himself. Was this what Rachel felt, seeing him in the hospital that day? That'd been all anger though, not this blinding panic. Jesus Christ, Amala just bit him on the ankle, she didn't rip his fucking throat out!

"I should go," Amala said quietly, and Rowan heard the jangle of her keys. A normal, mundane, human sound. Desperately, he focused on it, and finally found his breath, drawing it in slow and steady.

Not in the bus, not in the nightmare, sitting with my friend, I'm okay.

He opened his eyes, finally feeling as if he was regaining control, just as Amala reached the doorway.

"Wait..." R managed, his voice a little hoarse. "Please don't leave..."

Amala stopped at the door, but didn't turn around.

Rowan released a shaky breath. "I didn't mean to panic... I just... that was..."

"A surprise?" she said from the doorway.

"Yeah," he answered, and smirked. He'd been about to say insane. He'd never had a panic attack before. It was bizarre that something could hit him that hard after eight years. That he could rationally understand something wasn't a threat, but couldn't stop reacting as if it was. It'd been horrifying. But at least he wasn't dizzy anymore. Fainting in front of M was not something he'd ever live down.

Amala was still standing by the door, and still hadn't turned around.

Rowan sighed. "Please come back, I think I'll be okay this time."

She turned slightly. "You sure? Because it might not-"

He nodded, blowing out another breath. "I'm sure."

Amala slowly returned to her original seat across from them both. R watched her move, fascinated, still feeling echoes of fear, the overlapping past, but staying focused on the color of her eyes, though she would not look at him directly, and the warm tan of her skin.

Living, breathing, human.

M rubbed his hand down his face, looking contrite. "I'm sorry I pushed that Amala," he muttered, glancing at Rowan in concern. "I didn't know you were going to flip out."

"I didn't flip out..."Rowan grumbled awkwardly, crossing his arms.

M laughed. "You completely flipped out. You were going to faint!"

Face burning, Rowan looked down. "I was not..."

"Uh huh."

Rowan looked up to see the grin spreading on M's face and groaned inwardly. Dammit... I'm never hearing the end of this!

"I've seen it happen before," Amala said from the other side of the room, and R turned to watch her, equally disturbed and fascinated. "The moment of an attack is a very visceral thing. It stays with you, long after you've reconciled it mentally."

God, it was so surreal. The woman who'd turned him into a zombie was trying to reassure him about his anxiety. The thought made him laugh out loud.

Both Amala and M gave him worried glances, and shook his head. "I was just... um... never mind." He slowly let go of a breath he hadn't realized he'd been holding.

"Do you feel better?" Amala asked gently, still not meeting his eyes.

Shrugging, Rowan spoke as honestly as he could. "Uh... I guess? I don't... really know how I feel. I can't believe I'm talking to you. I can't believe you're here."

Amala nodded, looking down at her hands.

"I thought you'd died," he said.

She looked up at him briefly, frowning, then dropped her gaze again. The moment stirred another flicker of memory and R swallowed.

"I mean," he added quietly, "after the bus... I never saw you again. Not in the city, not at the airport. Nowhere in between." He shrugged. "I wasn't looking for you of course, I was dead, but looking back... you just disappeared. I thought you'd been killed."

A small smile played at Amala's mouth and she shook her head.

"What happened to you? Where'd you go? It was always at the back of my mind, that you might show up, but I never spent too long thinking about it, because I'd get..." he trailed off, not wanting to say it.

Amala's eyes sought his. "Angry?"

Something deeper stirred in him then, as he looked into her eyes, and it had nothing to do with fear. His pulse quickened and he quickly looked down, breaking eye contact as he took a steadying breath.

"Yeah," he answered and crossed his arms again as his leg began to bounce.

"You feel that now." She said. Not asking, but telling.

"Yeah," he breathed, his pulse beating hard against the skin of his neck. Then he met her gaze. "I do."

Amala stared back at him. "Because I took your life," she said quietly.

Grinding his teeth, the muscle tensing at the side of his jaw, he glared at her.

"You took everything from me," he said, his voice deeply bitter.

She straightened in her chair, holding her head high. "The disease did that, not me."

"You gave it to me," he snapped, "On purpose. You knew what you were doing."

Amala sighed. "I can't explain that. There was something about you, and you drew something out of me I had not felt since I'd died. And I was never the same after you."

Rowan blinked, and the anger melted away a little. "What do you mean?"

"You asked me where I went? After the bus? I went home Rowan, I wandered home, completely confused, completely lost. Still dead of course, but not understanding why I was that way, and looking for answers." She smirked. "I still killed those I encountered. I still had to eat, I was still driven to take. But it was strange. I didn't understand why, and none of the other dead had answers, because none of them were thinking."

At her words, Rowan's mouth fell open. "You were changing."

"Apparently. But I never connected with anyone else, so I never changed further. I stayed confused and lost, killing, returning home, standing in my living room for hours looking at these pieces of my life. Until that day when everything changed, and I no longer had the need to take. I stayed at home, existing between strange, memory soaked dreams, until someone found me. Another corpse, coming back to life, looking for others to save."

Amala smiled then, looking past Rowan. "When she found me, I was too weak to move. So she stayed with me, our connection was immediate and strong, and we drew each other up out of the dark. And we are still together."

"Huh," M said, and Rowan looked at him, having almost forgotten he was there. His friend had a curious smirk on his face.

Amala ignored M and smiled at R, "I guess I can thank you for Sam, just as you wanted to thank me for Julie."

The anger left Rowan in a tiring rush and he looked down at the floor, "So much for that, huh."

Amala frowned, "What do you mean?"

Rowan smirked, propping his chin on his hand. "So much for my intention to say thank you." He shook his head, "I don't know why I'm so angry... it wasn't your fault."

Amala gave him a kind look. "Rowan... you are angry because no matter what you said before, all of the good things you'd thank me for came at a terrible cost. Your memories, your family, what makes you you has been restored, and by some miracle the world... but the lives you took can never be returned. And you took many. As did I, as did Marcus."

M held up a hand. "I was a vegan zombie, I only ate vegetarians."

With a roll of her eyes, Amala shook her head. "Also, your friend is stuck at the mental age of twelve."

Rowan grinned. "Yeah, I know."

Amala gave him a sad smile. "For what it is worth, I am sorry."

With a gentle nod, Rowan returned the same sad smile. "Yeah. Me too."

Smiling warmly at him, Amala slowly rose to her feet, before grabbing her bag. "Marcus, I am glad you pushed. It was a good thing. And I think now I can ask you to leave, because I do have to lock up, and I wish to get home to my wife."

M grinned at R, waggling an eyebrow. R just shook his head at his friend, and they both got to their feet, following Amala through the church and out onto the stone stairs.

The night air was cool, but tinged with spring, and Rowan took a deep breath, basking in that promise of life, returning. He looked at Amala, who was turning back to lock up the old wooden door.

"Amala?"

She turned from the door. "Yes?"

"Same time next week?"

Grinning, she nodded. "Yes, and this time, I will not hide behind tissues."

With a laugh, Rowan turned and walked down the stairs to his friend. Then he turned back.

"Oh, Amala," he called out, "I forgot something."

Amala looked up again, curious. "What?"

Rowan smiled, looking her straight in the eye.

"Thank you."

And with a bright grin, R turned and walked away.

THE END

I had intended to add another part to this epilogue, but really it was kind of tacked on, and while quite lovely, was a little too rushed. I am currently thinking of another story for these characters, and if I publish it, I'll include it there, with the attention it deserves.

So this is the official ending for this story, I hope you liked it. Ever since the fifth chapter, where R casually recounts the support group, I'd been wondering if it would pop up in the story. And I'd always wondered what happened to the lady who bit R from my first story. When both the thin man and Rachel mentioned a lady helping them I wondered if it was her, and what R would do if he saw her.

Never knew he'd say thank you, until I wrote it. ;-)

If you've enjoyed my story, I'd love to hear from you in a review or PM. And, as always, thanks for reading!

Jen

UPDATE - Note to Melissa (and anyone else who wants a little more detail on these chapters):

It's a rare thing to get the kind of chapter by chapter feedback that you've been kind enough to provide. I feel really fortunate you've taken the time to do so, and wanted to make sure I could write back to a few of them, so here you go! [and whoa, did I go...]

Chapter 28, 29, 30: Glad you got caught up in questions about what was going to happen next! I know most folks thought R would turn back, but yeah, I'd always intended that he couldn't, that he was immune. And while part of that is because of what he's been through, part of it was actually due to Evan (would ya believe). Exposure to Evan's blood, and the resistance he'd built up with gradual exposure over the years, just clinched the deal on R's immunity, but wasn't enough to stop Evan from turning into a corpse after being stabbed. Sadly, I'm no immunologist, or hematologist, so I can't tell you why. ;) As to why the creature told Julie to stop, it was mostly because the point was to turn R, not have Julie eat his arm off. It was irritated with her anyway (so unruly). And yeah, I've always appreciated Julie's gratitude, and I enjoyed seeing it pop up again, even when she had no idea what to do with it (hard to talk with your mouth full, even as a corpse... ew...)

Chapter 31: Hahahahaha :D Oh my god that cracked me up :D And it's so true! Yes, he seems to accomplish the most when he's naked. Like Sampson and his long hair, maybe having everything 'hanging out' just gives R strength. *embarrassed facepalm* I don't know, it just happened that way ;) Btw, happy that you noticed (I guess through the report over the comm from downstairs) that Evan had been taken 'alive' as a corpse, that's cool. :)

Chapter 34, 35: Mwhahahaha! I've got to say, I thought the story was finished after R was brought back, and they'd successfully beaten the creature back (again, and it's not dead or gone btw). I was really to just wrap it up, was really feeling for Julie's pain and guilt there, and then... what Stephen did threw everything out of whack, and as I said at the end of that chapter, I had no idea that was going to happen. I was actually yelling at him (yes, yelling at words on a screen) while he was doing what he did. I was relieved that he wasn't completely without scruples (he did NOT inject R with corpse blood at least), and that it was motivated by his fear of the return and mutation of the disease.

Chapter 36: Glad you liked what happened between Stephen and Mark there. I was basically cheering for Mark at the end when he socked Stephen. As much as I love that doctor (and he is, I think my favorite OC, still!), he deserved that. Your review was hilarious ;)

Chapter 37: Tee hee. Wasn't it nice though? To have a break? :D Even if it just went downhill from there, at least they got THAT. This by the way, was another point where I thought the story was wrapping up, and then...

Chapter 38: DAMMIT MOON MOON! Stephen! For god's sake! The bite was a complete surprise to me. I didn't know it was happening until I typed that sentence. I had expected Stephen to cure Evan, or even to bring him back with a connection (as he started to do). I did not plan on a second wave. Glad you got caught up in it :D (ps, if you haven't seen the Dammit moon moon memes, check them out - hilarity)

Chapter 39: Poor Peterson. Bit of a dick, but that's a truly horrible way to go out. Particularly when he really does go out later on, so the man who was Peterson effectively came to an end in this chapter. Glad you enjoyed the perspective, and I really appreciate the compliment (and personally, glad it wasn't Gimmel!).

Chapter 40: Ha! Oh my god! Did not expect anyone to have that reaction - that's awesome :D 'Quick! R, eat his brain!' 'But... I'm not a zombie anymore!' Glad you liked the chapter. I was really thrilled I ended up having a ye olde horror movie zombie scene :D Made me really happy, was fun to write, and very easy to see in my head. Poor Tianna though, and dammit, another real death. Stephen's was hard for me too, but I knew he'd be coming back. (well, I did THEN, I had a terrible feeling he might really die a little earlier)

Chapter 41: It was an interesting surprise for me too (the memory/personality thing), and fascinating. The implications were amazing, and you're spot on. I see the once-dead now having extremely important roles in the rebuilding of society, as many of them would be jacks of all trades, and storehouses of pretty impressive knowledge. However, there are dangers associated with accessing it, and what happens once you start breaking those walls down. What happened here was an example, although it did take an interesting turn later. The story I'm playing with at the moment, explores this a little more :)

Chapter 42: R's corpse shuffle through the hospital was very interesting to me. Again, unplanned. I knew the pigeon guy was there, but R standing outside of the maternity ward was both sad and terribly creepy. What the hell would he have done if there'd actually been babies there? Eek. You want to talk about giving R something to regret... hoo boy. As you would have found out in the next chapter, Amy was Jack's wife. And it was terribly sad what happened there. I found it interesting that R is fascinated by her suicide, her choice not to turn, that he seems to pick up on it and stares down at her for a while.

Chapter 43: Ha! Yes, because getting naked fixes EVERYTHING. This chapter turned super heavy, super quick, and I was literally along for the ride as I was writing.

Chapter 45: Yay! Yeah, I'm glad that came across - the self-hate, guilt thing. I had at one point thought the resolution here would be a negotiation of sorts, that Jack was more of an entity within R than just R's head trying to deal with the horror of what he'd done, but it ended up working out as it should. At this point, I knew this was the climax of the story, and that it was now time to pull the threads together. As long as Stephen and Evan didn't do anything funny %)

Chapter 46: It made me really happy to read your review of this chapter. I was not sure how Evan's storyline was going to resolve, and while it was touch and go there for a bit (he would have ripped that soldier apart), Stephen was again the calm eye of the storm, as an anchor of sorts for Evan, though in a different way than Julie is for R. It's still about connection of course, but more the one between a father and son. Made me very happy to feel Evan have some hope. I can't say the dude is going to turn out okay, but there is at least a little light at the end of the tunnel. And hey, if Stephen believes in him, I... well, Stephen's a bit suspect now too ;)

Chapter 47: Yep! :D Headlock! I enjoy the relationship between those two. I'd love to explore some moments when they were a family, when R was a lot younger. Would be interesting to see how different Mark was back then.

Chapter 48: Yay! Thank YOU! I'm glad you enjoyed it, glad the characters really spoke to you. I've rambled on a bit more than I meant to here, but as you can probably pick up on, writing this was like watching a movie for me. It's wonderful to have somebody to 'chat to' about it ;) Oh one quick thing - Evan turning up was something I had planned (once everything else had resolved), but I had figured it would be light in tone. How it turned out actually spooked me a little. Evan is not a 'nice' guy. I have no idea how he'll turn out, but there's still a lot he's capable of, and R has reason for fear around him.

Chapter 49: Glad you liked my characterization of M. I'm not quite spot on with the movie character or the book character, but perhaps somewhere in between. Love his humor though, glad you do to. We'll see if he pops up again :D I was interested to hear his 'origin' story too, and just imagined him staggering out of the bathroom, sitting heavily in a chair by a gate, and dying in a really pissed off mood as the world went to ruin around him.

Thanks again, I'm indebted. :) I'll update my profile with any progress I make on a new story, if you're interested. Do you have any stories on here btw?

Jen