A/N: Please don't question it, I'm just really bored. I am also addicted to theatre.
"I still don't see why you guys are British," he said, taking a swig of his water bottle, before turning back to the object he was repairing.
Sirius looked at the boy, Ricky Lupin, the American version of one of his best friends, contemplating. Though the incident was unexpected, part of him liked the fact that the massive explosions in his Potions Class had resulted in the six of them travelling to another universe (though he honestly could do without that bastard Snivellus and Evans wouldn't be so bad if she wasn't so annoying), because, boy oh boy, what an experience.
Sitting across the table from him was Ricky Lupin, who was fiddling with something that looked funny to Sirius, but was apparently really important. The boy looked almost exactly like Remus, the version from Sirius' universe, minus the scars and drab clothes. This Lupin looked like a Muggle of the early 2000s (and that was a shocker! Them being teenagers in 2014? How is that even possible?), with his tight jeans, ratty Chuck Taylors, unbuttoned flannel shirt, a hat that was apparently called a "beanie" (weird-ass Muggle theatre kids and their weird-ass shit), and a t-shirt under the flannel with a saying that made no sense to Sirius whatsoever.
"Cos Brits are the best and Americans are shit. But don't let James hear you call him British. He'll go on a year long rant about Scotland and how he's Scottish and you'll never get him to shut up," Sirius replied. "What are you doing again?"
Ricky chuckled. "John can't do a good Scottish accent for the life of him, so that's ironic, huh? Anyway, as an American, I'm probably obligated to advocate the greatness of freedom, but I have to agree with you. Americans, ugh," he replied with a groan. Then he gestured to the thing in front of him. "I'm repairing a cable head. Once I get this working, I use it to hook up the lighting instruments to the electrical circuits, which is how we non-magic-people make things like artificial light and moving pictures work."
Sirius blinked. "It looks like you're doing arts and crafts."
He heard a snort behind him. "Yeah, the arts and crafts of electrocution and death," said this world's version of himself, Sammy Black. Sammy was was dressed pretty similar to Ricky, but lacking the hat and flannel shirt. Instead, he bore a hooded sweatshirt that read Theatre Honor Society 2013-2014. Sirius could only think about how his mother would have a stroke if she saw how his other self was dressing. "Those lights kids are living on the edge. So hardcore, man. Such danger. Much wires."
"I swear to god, if you're making another doge meme joke, I'll tell everyone you said the Scottish play," came another voice. Sirius scowled as he realized it was the American version of Snivellus, Sam Snape. The bastard had the nerve of matching Sammy, though their shoes were different. God, this world was so fucked up. No way in hell would he ever be friends with any versions of Severus Snape, not even if he was only acting on a stage. The pair from this universe weirded him out. How is it that everyone just accepts that they have the same name and not find it strange? And why does only Black respond to Sammy and Snape only respond to Sam, when Sirius has heard them call each other by the reverse naming pattern? And why does everybody shout Samuel when they want to talk to both of them?
"You see, this is why I joined scenery crew when I started doing theatre," Sammy replied easily, leaning on shelf next to the table. "You lights kids are so bitter."
Ricky snorted, leaning back in his wheely chair to shoot Sammy an amused look, and Sirius quirked a grin at the familiarity of the image. "You told me you didn't join lights because the ladders scare you." Sirius outright laughed at that. This was just like his conversations with Remus about various prank ideas.
"Quiet, you," Sammy shushed.
"But, anyway," Sam said, seating himself in another wheely chair. "We came in here to ask if you guys have seen John and Leah. We need them for acting stuff. Can't rehearse our scene without them."
"Actor trash," Ricky muttered good-naturedly under his breath, chuckling when Sammy smacked the back of his head.
"James mentioned that he was going with them to the make-up room in the basement to watch John do Leah's make-up so she has an idea of what she has to do for the show. I think Lily went with Paul and Pete to learn about the sound system," Sirius replied, wheeling his chair back just enough to prop his feet on the table. "Dunno where Remus is."
Sam rolled his eyes. "John's probably taking his sweet time since it's his only chance to touch the face of Leah Evans," he said, sarcasm heavy. Ricky let out a snort as he went back to his cable project.
"Where's Mister Grump-Grump?" Sammy interjected, after laughing his agreement to the previous comment.
"Who, the Snape from my world?" Sirius asked, quirking an eyebrow.
"Yeah. The guy who refuses to speak to me because I'm apparently a 'disappointment' and a 'disgrace to the house of Slytherin,' whatever the hell that means," Sam added, face showing the barest hint of confusion, but otherwise looking unfazed.
"To be honest, we all find this version of you weird," Sirius told him. "You're a huge dick in our world, and there's a lot of hatred between us."
"I have a huge dick in this world," Sam replied, straight-faced and barely holding back a smirk. "If that counts for anything."
"Twenty bucks says you're lying," Sammy shot back.
"I'm not showing you my dick for twenty dollars, you thirsty mutt," Sam said, and Sirius tried not to feel sick over the fact that it was essentially himself and Snape having this conversation.
"You know, if it weren't for the fact that everyone knows it's my dick that Sammy's after, we'd all swear you two were already sleeping together," Ricky added and Sirius was out of his seat and walking to the bathroom door on the other side of the theatre office.
"I'm gonna vomit."
John chuckled from the doorway, James standing next to him. "Who's gonna be the one to tell him about all the kissing scenes you two have had to share from the plays you've been in?" he asked, pointing a thumb at the gagging boy who still had the bathroom door open as he leaned over the toilet seat. At that comment, Sirius started retching even more and James let out a noise of disgust.
Sammy laughed. "Still not as bad as the time you had to give my little brother a lap dance at the closing night after party truth or dare game."
"Are you trying to scar their brains forever?" Remus said, squeezing his way into the room around the two Potter boys.
"And you aren't scarred, too?" Sam asked, spinning his chair to face the door.
"I've been telling him horror stories to prepare him," Ricky said, not looking up from his project. "Now can all the actor trash clear out of here? I'm trying to work."
A/N: I don't know. I just really like the Marauder Era. And I just really like stories with multiple universes. And I just really like theatre.
Plus I didn't want to add to my other stuff.
I might add more to this. I might not.
The theatre versions of the characters were based off a weird dream I had. And yes, it is totally my head canon that they'd be Sam and Sammy and Sam would be the only one allowed to call Sammy "Sam" and Sammy would be the only one allowed to call Sam "Sammy." And people would just shout Samuel if they wanted both of them. I like this system.
Also, Regulus is Ryan Black.