Clockwork Heart

Chapter Five

Kurt is awake before dawn and hurrying down the streets with his jacket pulled tight around his chest. It's far colder than it should be for a summer's morning but why would Kurt get any luck on the day of opening night? He keeps looking up at the sky and the gray clouds and knows that by the time the audience is walking to the theater, the rain will be falling.

The lamplighters and people who are unlucky enough to work a night shift are the only other people out in the streets at the moment. Kurt sees one lamplighter he recognizes and nods a greeting as he hurries past, flinching as a gust of cold wind buffets him. He has to let go of one side of his jacket in order to slap a hand to the top of his top hat. It's the nicest one he owns and having that roll through the streets, collecting dirt and dew, on opening night will be as bad an omen as the rain.

Dawn is breaking when Kurt reaches the theater, the sun's early morning light cresting the tops of the buildings and giving Kurt enough light to be able to open the door without missing the keyhole the first few times. When Kurt has made these early morning trips to the theater in the middle of winter he has had those embarrassing failed attempts to open the door.

After opening the theater and slipping inside, Kurt shuts the door and the noise echoes around the theater, making it seem like a hundred doors were slammed shut. Kurt's eyes follow the sound, sweeping over the dark theater. But there's something different about it today. It's the same room he's always seen: threadbare carpet, red velvet seats and matching velvet curtains, gold paint on the boxes for the aristocrats, clockwork designs on the ceiling beams and burnt out oil lamps hanging on the walls.

But there is definitely something different.

Kurt doesn't feel the same this morning to how he felt the morning of opening night forRomeo and Juliet. He hadn't thought the troupe had been practicing for nearly long enough and, as usual, he'd been completely right. Today he feels excitement coursing through him and a smile forms on his lips as he looks over the theater.

Today might not be perfect, it might not go exactly to plan. It might turn out to be an utter disaster and this will be the last time Kurt unlocks the doors to a theater that has his name on the deed. But as he's fixed up every automaton and seen Rachel and Blaine put the play together piece by piece, he knows they've done far more than their best and he is excited to show the audience what they've been working on.

Besides, he doesn't think it will be a disaster.

Kurt spends the next hour bustling around the theater doing chores that he finished last night but does on the morning of every opening night for good luck. He lights the oil lamps that hang in each box, illuminating the night's thin and barely noticeable layer of dust that Kurt quickly swipes away. He carries an spare oil lamp down the central aisle, swinging it from his right to his left as he looks for trash that could have collected from an unknown source, rips in the fabric of the chairs that he can quickly repair before the audience members sits down, and any fold-up chairs that look like they are stuck and need oiling before being used.

After putting out every oil lamp he just lit, Kurt walks passed every high window and opens the curtains, flooding the room with natural sunlight, weak as the sun shines through the gray clouds and the window glass. He checks the curtains on each side of the stage as well, fussing with the thick gold rope that holds the curtain and patting each fold until it hangs straight.

They had performed the play in its entirety for the final dress rehearsal last night with Kurt in the front row of the seats to watch and the stage is still covered in the props no one wanted to put away last night. Kurt takes the small staircase in two big steps and walks across the stage, bending down to pick up a stray veil. He folds it delicately, not wanting to snag any of the lace, and tucks it under his arm. The other three veils are also on the stage and Kurt is bending down to pick up the second veil when one of the doors opens and closes behind him.

Kurt looks over his shoulder and sees Blaine walking down the central aisle, his jacket buttoned and his own top hat tucked underneath his arm. To Kurt's dismay, there are glistening spots of rain visible in the black fabric.

"Hi Kurt," Blaine says loudly enough for his voice to carry down the hall to where Kurt is standing. His eyebrows furrow as he looks over the stage and then gestures with the hand not holding onto his hat. "What's all that?"

Kurt laughs and looks over his shoulder before replying. "We really should have finished putting everything away last night," he says in lieu of an explanation.

It's more than enough of an explanation however, because Blaine leaves his hat and outdoor coat on a chair like Kurt has done and then climbs up onto the stage. "I'll help you," he says, giving Kurt a wide smile in greeting, "but you'll probably have to help me put everything in their right places."

They work quietly for a few minutes, moving chairs and tables off stage and into the wings. Kurt moves everything into the places they'd been last night, in easy reach for tonight when he's stage right and for Mercedes when she's stage left.

"How are you, Blaine?" Kurt asks, reaching out and resting a hand on Blaine's forearm once they've let go of their loads. Kurt has been asking Blaine that question every day since his impromptu operation.

Blaine has replied to Kurt's question with the same answer every day. He doesn't disappoint, saying, "I'm fine Kurt. Really." But today he looks at Kurt with an expression he can't identify and continues talking, something that's new in this reoccurring discussion. "Thanks to you, I'm going to be fine for a long time."

"Good," Kurt says. He looks down at the table, reaches out towards it as if to move it and then looks back up at Blaine to say, "That's why you agreed to work for us for nothing, isn't it." He phrases it as a statement, rather than a question, because Kurt has been thinking about that for a while.

Whatever the emotion that had been in Blaine's eyes fades and he nods, any trace of a smile or fondness gone. "I didn't think it would work for much longer," he says, his voice quiet, "and every since I was a boy I've wanted to be on stage. So when your offer of a part came up, I wasn't going to turn it down just because of a small problem."

"You call not get paid for three months 'a small problem'?" Kurt asks, laughter in his voice. He's leaning on the table now, the wooden edge cutting into his palms as he presses the whole weight of his body against them. He tries to ignore the clench in his heart when Blaine had said he didn't think his pacemaker would work for much longer.

Blaine laughs and ducks his head. "Small in the grand scheme of things," he says. Then he looks over his shoulder at the stage and the debris of props they still have to collect. "You have something amazing here Kurt, and I can't wait for the people in the audience tonight to see the work you and Rachel have done. And I'm glad to been able to be a part of it all the way through."

Kurt steps away from the table and reaches out to take Blaine's hand. Something in him wants to give Blaine a hug, holding him to make sure that he's not going to fall apart again. But instead Kurt says, "Like we would have said no after your audition."

Again Blaine laughs and his eyes are shining again with the joie de vivre Kurt has seen often since his pacemaker was repaired. Any lasting tension from the topic of Blaine's pacemaker potentially having failed by now disappears, floating away in the wind as if it had never been around.

"Come on," Kurt says, nodding towards the stage and he leads Blaine back to the remains of their props, not letting go of Blaine's hand until he forced to by the need to carry on tidying up the stage.

Within an hour Rachel has arrived, the smile on her face as wide as Kurt has seen it for a long time. She's already half-dressed in her costume, wearing the burgundy corset and matching headband that she chose as the perfect outfit for Beatrice.

"Kurt!" She says loudly when she sees him, standing on a small step ladder to fix the background of the opening scene to the back of the stage. It's a large canvas painting of a large manor house in summer, and it's perfectly reasonable for the house to be located in modern-day Italy. It's also the first thing Kurt and Rachel found when exploring the storeroom after receiving the keys to the theater.

It's rather fitting, using the first scene they found in the play that could be the last they perform in the theater.

"Kurt," Rachel says as she runs up the stairs to the stage. "Some people stopped in the street to ask about tonight's play. If there were still tickets, when the doors open, if we were putting on any more performances."
When she reaches him, Rachel rests her hand on Kurt's forearm, gazing up at him with her brown eyes shining with delight. "This is going to work," she says, excitement in her voice. "Today is going to be perfect."

Kurt has had his emotions rise and fall since he awoke, rising to high levels of excitement and falling to a simmering state of happiness and anticipation. Seeing Rachel look so enthralled makes his emotions rise again.

"What did you tell them?" he asks, referring to whether there would be more performances of their play. They'd planned to extend the play's run to at least a week if the audience liked it on opening night.

"I told them that of course there would be more plays," Rachel says, "and that they should come to us tomorrow to purchase tickets."

Rachel steps away, moving far enough on the stage to cast her eyes over the canvas Kurt is hanging. She points to the side Kurt's currently pinning. "That needs to be a little higher, Kurt," she says and then continues, "This play is going to be the making of us. And one day I know we'll look back on this moment with such fond memories."

Kurt dutifully raises the corner of the canvas a little higher, pinning it to the wall in its new location. "We have to get through tonight with no disasters first, Rachel," he says, the voice of reason even through his own excitement. Although, he does believe that Rachel is right.

Slowly but surely, Kurt, Rachel and Blaine prepare the theater for tonight. After fixing the stage for the opening scene, Kurt and Blaine prepare the wings so that the props are in easy reach and hang the changes of background on the rails that run along the back wall of the stage. The canvas backgrounds can be quickly changed like curtains, covering the painting of the manor house completely and then being removed when they need the first painting again.

Rachel busies herself with preparing the front of house, brushing away dust that Kurt missed in the morning, setting small lanterns at the end of each row to light the way to the seats when the theater is in total darkness. She sets up the tall chairs with long wooden legs by the doors for Sam and Mercedes to sit in while they collect the ticket stubs.

Mercedes arrives just after midday, the band from the tavern in tow. "Hi," she sings and the smile on her face is wide. Happiness is contagious it seems. She gives Kurt a hug, keeping her hands on his arms when she pulls away. "I can't believe opening night is finally here," she says.

"I know," Kurt replies, then glances at the band members. He had mentioned to Mercedes about having live music playing when the audience enters the theater, and live music in the celebration and wedding scenes in the play. Mercedes had talked to her manager and the previous evening had arrived with the band in tow, just like this morning.

"Thanks for coming," Kurt says to them, the five male musicians looking blankly around the room. Each held a case with their instrument, except the man Kurt knows to be the drummer. The drummer nods and that's all the response Kurt gets.

"Do they mind helping us out?" Kurt murmurs to Mercedes when the musicians have walked away to set up the small area to the right of the stage where they will play that evening. "They didn't say anything last night but they don't exactly look happy to be here."

Mercedes shrugs. "I think so. They never really say much," she says. "Come to think of it, I don't know if I've ever had a proper conversation with any of them in the last three years."

Looking at the musicians, Kurt says, "I don't even know what their names are."

Mercedes makes a hum of agreement, then shakes her head. "Three years and I don't know them either," she says. She laughs to herself and shakes her head again before looking up at Kurt. "How's Rachel doing today?"

Kurt shoots Mercedes a look, telling her without words that Rachel is exactly how she always is on opening night. "Micromanaging as usual," he says. Rachel has circled the theater three times, fixing many of the things Kurt had fixed when he arrived and even more things that hadn't needed to be fixed at all. "She's insisted that she rehearses the scene with Jesse after the first wedding again. Which means-"

"She'll need all of us to watch and compliment," Mercedes says, interrupting Kurt with the exact words he was going to say.

Kurt laughs, nods and says, "Rachel is nothing but committed. But sometimes she can be a little too committed. Blaine is getting the automatons ready anyway, so what's the harm in appeasing Rachel and getting Jesse ready first?"

Sweeping her hands up and down her dress, Mercedes changes the subject and asks, "I chose this dress especially for today. Do I have your approval?"

Kurt takes a step back and looks over Mercedes' dress. It's a beautiful dress, in a deep purple color and the front of her skirt stitched up to show her legs. She's curled her hair as well, and it is falling round her face to frame it. Kurt has known Mercedes for a long time and has no qualms telling her the truth about how she looks, the same way Mercedes voices her honest opinions about his clothes on occasion.

"You look great, Mercedes," he says sincerely. She beams and Kurt can't help the happiness he feels at Mercedes' effort. He and Rachel had talked about it and had asked Mercedes to announce the play; informing the audience that the play would be starting as well as giving the necessary cue for the automatons.

"What are you wearing tonight?" she asks.

Kurt tugs at his own jacket, which he replaced after preparing the stage for the opening scene. "Pretty much this," he says, gesturing to his black suit pants, black and white suit jacket and white shirt with the top two buttons left open. "I've got my hat – you know the one we bought together where I got the price knocked down to under half-" Mercedes nods and laughs at the memory "-and I've brought a tie with but I'm not sure I'm going to wear it."

Mercedes opens her mouth to reply but Blaine runs into the room, his eyes wide and a panicked look on his face. He runs right up to Kurt and says, "Kurt you need to come quick. There's a problem with Jesse."

Kurt almost runs to the small office that he made into the room to house the automatons. He's breathing hard but not from the exertion: his heart is racing from panic and his mind is whirling from thinking about what could possibly be wrong with Jesse.

He reaches the room, throws open the door and walks inside, automatically reaching towards the small table just next to the door where he left his tool box last night. He grabs the goggles and slips them over his head, adjusting the strap until it's comfortable and then positioning the goggles just above his eyes.

The other eleven automatons are up and moving, walking around the room or gazing at each other. Tina is the most animated, walking over to Kurt and Blaine when they enter the room and standing next to her on-stage partner. Mercedes, who has followed after yelling for Rachel, stands in the doorway, leaning against the door post.

"Blaine," Kurt says, stripping off his suit jacket and shoving it into his hands, "hold this."

Jesse is the only automaton not on his feet. He's slumped in a chair, looking like someone who has fallen asleep after drinking far too much gin. The key used to wind the mainspring is sticking out of his back, like Blaine was halfway through winding the automaton before realising something was very wrong.

Kurt walks around the chair, rolling up the white sleeves of his dress shirt to just above his elbows as he does. He'd worn his best clothing today because he really hadn't thought he'd be doing any mechanical repairs apart from superficial ones. He pushes Jesse's body forward until it folds over and completely reveals his back. He pulls at the key, removing it and gives that to Blaine as well. Glancing up at Blaine when he hands him the key, Kurt says, "Tell me what happened."

In a voice that shakes, Blaine says, "I was winding them all like you showed me. I was going to start with Jesse so Rachel could rehearse again but the key was sort of stuck so I wound the rest of them first. But I just couldn't wind the clockwork in Jesse. And something went, well, clunk when I tried again. And that's when I ran to get you."

Carefully, Kurt pries open the plates of metal, sticking his fingers in the free space down the side of Jesse's torso to move the metal. Holding the plate that makes up Jesse's back, he pulls the goggles over his eyes and takes a look. He can see the repaired wheels, looking under strain and ready to be replaced. But it's the pinions that catch his gaze. So many of them needed repairing when he came to fix Jesse and he'd only had the old broken pieces from Blaine's clockwork to use.

He had managed to repair Jesse using those parts from Blaine's clockwork. He had had to spend a day in Dad's garage, sanding down each bearing, replacing broken teeth on the wheels and refitting the jewels just to get the clockwork started. He gratefully put in another order for brand new parts and had said to Dad that he thought the parts from Blaine's clockwork would work well enough to get them through the wait for the new parts to be delivered. Then when they arrived, Kurt would repair Jesse again.

Although now it seemed that they wouldn't even make it past opening night.

"What's wrong?" Rachel says. Kurt glances up to see her standing with Mercedes in the doorway, hanging onto Mercedes' hand like it was her lifeline. "Is he okay? Is he going to work?"

Kurt sticks his hand inside Jesse, moving past the wheels of the mechanism until he can reach the part of the clockwork that had fallen out when Blaine tried to wind him. He picks it up with the tips of his fingers and slowly – very slowly – pulls it out.

Something sinks in Kurt's stomach. Any excitement he had at the beginning of the day has fled as if it were a dream chased away by the sun. In the palm of his hand is the safety pinion: a part of the clockwork that unscrews only when the mainspring is broken. And if the mainspring is broken then there's no way Jesse will work.

"Well?" Rachel demands, still not moving from her spot at the door.

Resigned, Kurt reaches up and pulls the goggles off his head. He sighs, looking at the pinion in his hand. At least the rest of the clockwork was saved from being destroyed. That was the job of the safety pinion after all.

"We have to cancel the show," he says rather than directly answering her question. Although as soon as he says it, Kurt thinks that that might not have been the best way to announce to Rachel that her on-stage clockwork partner was broken and there wasn't enough time to fix him.

"What?" Rachel cries, "Why? Why can't you fix him?"

Finally Kurt looks away from the pinion, closing his fingers around it and feeling the cool metal against his warm skin. "The mainspring is broken Rachel. There's nothing I can do without a replacement."

"And don't you have a replacement? There was more than enough time to buy supplies," Rachel says, her eyes blazing with dismay.

Kurt just raises one of his eyebrows. Of course he had a replacement: it is just being used somewhere else, and somewhere more important. He sees Blaine blush when the silence stretches a little longer than if he had just been pausing to think. It's not Blaine's fault that his clockwork pacemaker needed repairing and there's no way that Kurt will let Rachel say that either.

To her grace, Rachel looses a little of the wild panic in her eyes but she still says, "And you don't have another one? Why can't you fix him?"

Kurt shakes his head and says, "The new parts haven't come in yet and using a mainspring that doesn't fit the barrel won't change a thing." He looks around the room, looking for an analogy to use to explain the problem to the non-mechanics. "It's like an airship without any fuel. Jesse can't run because we can't wind the clockwork: just like an airship can't fly if there's no fuel for the fire to fill the balloon."

"Oh god," Rachel says after a long moment of silence. She lifts a hand to cover her mouth.

"I'm so sorry Kurt," Blaine says, his voice quiet but carrying loudly through the silent room. Even the other automatons have stopped moving, as if they can sense that something is very wrong.

Kurt looks up at Blaine, shocked to hear the apology. For a moment Kurt wonders if Blaine was apologizing for breaking the clockwork or for taking the parts he needed: Kurt chooses to think that it's the first option. "It's not your fault," he says. He walks over to Blaine and rests his hands over Blaine's, "This would have happened no matter who wound Jesse."

"But, what can we do about the play?" Blaine asks. His eyes are wide and Kurt can see the despair in Blaine's eyes as clear as if he was reading a book. "We can't cancel it: not without you two losing the theater. And that can't happen: you two have worked too hard for this theater."

"What part do you need to replace?" Mercedes asks, speaking for the first time in what seems like hours.

Somehow Kurt knows she's not talking about the clockwork. "Benedick," he says. Why had Rachel insisted on using Jesse to play one of the main parts, when he was obviously the hardest automaton to fix? Kurt had wanted Jake to play the part but even delving into Jake's thought-processor to change which character he is playing won't save the play now. They'd need to find another Don Pedro and all the alterations to their play – like Signior Leonato being changed to Signora Leonata – would have to be added too. There isn't enough time to programme another automaton to take the place.

The silence is so absolute, Kurt can hear the public outside. A child is laughing and the slap of his shoes against the wet cobblestones is audible even through the small window. Kurt remembers what Rachel said about the excited audience members and another part of his stomach drops. They'll have to be turned away and given their money back. Money that he and Rachel simply cannot afford to return.

With this broken automaton, their dreams have shattered. Shattered like the mainspring in Jesse's clockwork.

"I don't think you have to cancel the play," Mercedes says. Her voice makes Kurt look up and sees her staring at him with determination on her face. Was she about to offer to play Benedick? But she was looking at Kurt with that determination, not at the other three.

"What do you mean?" Rachel says.

"Kurt, don't you know every line?" Mercedes asks. A chill runs through Kurt and he can feel the gooseflesh run over his body. The hairs on his arms even rise like it's winter rather than summer.

Surely she can't be insinuating that Kurt should take the role? After the last time he stepped on stage and was laughed off and Kurt had spent a week hiding in Mercedes' apartment, surely she knows exactly what that would do to him?

Rachel gasps and runs to Kurt, grabbing onto his arm. "Yes," she says with excitement and delight in her voice, "Kurt you have to do it. You can be Benedick and this will fix all our problems."

"No," Kurt says. He's already began to tremble, hearing the mocking laughter, the words of so-called advice, the cruel tones when he overheard the professionals talking about his auditions. "Rachel, I can't."

But Rachel doesn't listen. "We should start rehearsing now. I know that you can act and you've acted as Benedick in our rehearsals before but especially the scene in the chapel, we need to practice that-"

"Rachel, no," Kurt says more forcefully this time. To his horror, his voice cracks. Blaine, whose hands he's still holding on to, looks at him with concern. He goes to speak but Kurt starts talking first. "I can't do it. I'd ruin the play. We're better off cancelling."

"Kurt-" Blaine says but Rachel cuts him off.

"Don't be silly, Kurt. You won't. Besides, we don't have another choice. Now your costume," she says, stepping away from Kurt and looking him up and down. Blaine's hands shift until he's holding Kurt's and they squeeze but Kurt can barely feel them. The blood is rushing in his ears – or is that the memory of the laughter?

"You need to go back home and pick out something more formal than even what you're wearing. Blaine and I are wearing formal outfits for the play and you'll need to match," Rachel says. She's acting like she can't see the terror on Kurt's face and when she pauses for breath, Kurt pulls away from her and from Blaine.

"I can't Rachel," he says, forcing her to stop talking and look up at him. He stands stock still for a moment, surrounded by the three people he called the closest in his life and the automatons he painstakingly fixed. The idea of acting in the play that will either make or break their theater dreams has his heart racing and his hands trembling.

He can't be here.

So he leaves. Kurt pushes past Rachel and Mercedes, not turning around when he hears them call his name. Footsteps sound behind him but Kurt runs out of the backstage area, into the main theater. He runs up the aisle and slams into one of the doors, opens it and is outside in the thankfully bright noon sunlight before whoever was following makes it into the main room.

Without a look behind him, Kurt walks away from the theater, into the growing crowd congregating outside, waiting impatiently for that evening and the play to begin.

Kurt walks and walks until his growling stomach makes him stop and buy a greasy pastry fresh out of the oven. He barely gives the shopkeeper a smile as he hands over the money he luckily had in the pocket of his pants. Kurt eats the pastry in two large bites and it appeases his rumbling stomach. But once the hunger pains have gone, the nerves creep back in.

Seven years ago, Kurt would have jumped for joy to be given an opportunity like this. He would have offered even before Mercedes had pointed it out. Kurt does know every line and he could, theoretically, step in and play Benedick to Rachel's Beatrice.

But that's nice in theory. There's no way he can do it. Every audition he ever went for was a disaster and he can't live through that again.

Kurt walks through the town, dodging pedestrians and shopkeepers until he reaches the square with the large fountain. Water is billowing out of the top of the fountain and Kurt feels the water spray on his face. For a moment, he stops walking and just lets the water splash, the fountain the only sound in his ears. Even with the people moving in the street jostling him, Kurt finds the whole scenario somewhat peaceful.

There's no way he can be Benedick. He can't get up on stage to see people stand and leave, or stay and laugh. He can't decide which would be worse. Kurt used to dream all the time of when he would be a stage in front of a loud, applauding audience. He loved performing for Dad, the other mechanics, friends at school and Mom before she died. He would plan small monologues or sing short songs whenever he could. And he had had no doubt that he'd be able to make it to Broadway within a few short years.

But each audition has crushed that dream for him to a point where Kurt used to think he'd never have a chance at his dream again. And now it's here, he can't take it.

"Mr Hummel?" a voice calls, breaking through the mist of water spray and contemplation in his mind. Kurt opens his eyes, not realizing that he'd closed them, and turns to look behind him. His heart stops when he sees Isabelle Wright standing there.

She looks beautiful in her gown, her parasol held in one hand, and Kurt is very aware that he might be wearing one of his best suits and by far one of his favorite outfits but his hair is messed up, his sleeves are rolled to his elbows and he's still wearing the goggles around his forehead.

"Miss Wright," he says, stumbling over the words only a little. There is very little he could do to change his appearance. Kurt reaches up and takes the goggles off his head and begins to roll down one of the sleeves on his shirt. "It's good to see you again."

No it's not. Any other day, Kurt would be overjoyed to have someone like Isabelle Wright greeting him in the street. But today, where he'll probably have to tell her right now that the play is cancelled, he wishes that he hadn't bumped into her.

"And it's good to see you too, Kurt," Miss Wright says. Her smile drops for a moment and she says, "If I can call you Kurt."

Kurt nods, because he doesn't mind the informality coming from someone like Isabelle. He's not going to presume the same. Deftly, Kurt buttons the cuff of his shirt sleeve with one hand and only glancing at the cuff once. He then takes hold of the goggles in his other hand and starts working on rolling down the other sleeve.

"I must say, Kurt, that I am greatly looking forward to the performance tonight," Miss Wright says, and Kurt feels his stomach clench in horror at her words, "I brought a friend back from Columbus and he's looking forward to the play as well."

And now she's brought an aristocrat friend to see their play. Kurt's heart clenches along with his stomach. He can't tell her that they are cancelling the play, not only because they can't afford to give her the money she spent on tickets back. He doesn't want to disappoint her. Isabelle looks happy to be seeing Kurt now, and to be telling him about her excitement for the play that evening. She has a smile on her face that Kurt just doesn't want to see her lose.

"Your father told me more about the situation with the theater when I was invited back to the garage the other day," Miss Wright says, stepping closer to Kurt and resting a hand on Kurt's still-uncovered wrist. "He mentioned the other plays with troupes that didn't work out."

Kurt keeps his facial expression as a polite smile but inside he rolls his eyes. He has no idea what she could be saying. Dad means well but Kurt can't help but wonder if he's given Isabelle Wright a little too much information about the situation. He might as well have said that they had serious money problems as well.

"I think it's really good that you and Miss Berry are trying again," Miss Wright says, "That you two are that committed to your dreams. If I had been as committed as you are, I would never have had the problems that I've had throughout my career."

Again, Kurt keeps his face polite but this time his insides are twisting. He has to replay her words in his mind to fully understand that she's comparing their situations, and saying that Kurt is the admirable one.

"I have no doubt," Miss Wright says, cutting through Kurt's musings, "that tonight will be an absolute success." She gives him a wide and genuine smile.

Thank you but I'm afraid that as one of our automaton is broken, the play is cancelled.

That's what Kurt should say. That's what Kurt needs to say. It's the truth and having a play cancelled on opening night hours before it begins is only slightly worse than having a play cancelled on opening night when the audience is already in their seats.

But at some point in the conversation with Isabelle, Kurt's tumbling nerves and disbelief have calmed, far better than standing in the spray of the water fountain has done. He's still nervous but in the back of his mind, eighteen year old Kurt Hummel is eagerly shouting that of course he can act. It's exactly what he wanted to do ever since seeing Wicked in the April Rhodes Civic Pavilion all those years ago. And Isabelle Wright telling him that picking himself up off the ground to try again is admirable has just pushed away the wall of doubt he had built since leaving the theater.

So instead of telling her that the play is cancelled, Kurt says, "Thank you. I do hope you'll enjoy the play tonight."

Isabelle nods and glances around at the other pedestrians as if she's looking for someone. "If you'll excuse me Kurt," she says when she looks back at him, "I must run and meet my friend before tonight. But I hope to see you after the show to give you my personal congratulations."

And she leaves. Kurt stands still but he feels light, as if he's an airship that's been pumped full of air and is about to take-off. Disbelief begins to set in, bringing back the memories of the auditions, the scorn and the laughter but Kurt tries to pay the memories no heed. He can't back out now and the eighteen-year-old dreamer that still lives somewhere inside him is reminding him of that.

If Kurt backed out now, he'd not only be letting Isabelle Wright down but he'd be letting down Dad, who has obviously been proudly telling all of his customers about Kurt's play. He'd be letting Mercedes down, and Sam and Blaine and Rachel. Kurt doesn't want to let either Blaine or Rachel down, not after the days of work both have put into the play. And the years of work he and Rachel have spent to make it just to this point.

And he'd be letting himself down. Eighteen year old Kurt who turned up to his first audition with bright eyes and a smile so wide it hurt his cheeks for hours would have accepted the role before he'd thought it over. So why did twenty-five year old Kurt turn it down just as fast.

Kurt has to take the role of Benedick now. And maybe – just maybe – he won't hear the laughter or the mocking when he takes to the stage and acts.

Kurt returns to the theater after making a stop at his apartment. He changes his boots from his thigh-high buckled favorites to black boots and beige spats that cover most of the shoe and reach his knees. He also picks up another jacket, rolling his eyes when he realizes that his black and white striped jacket is still in the theater with Blaine. This suit jacket is a tailcoat and purple and by far one of the most expensive pieces of clothing Kurt owns. It's also one of the pieces of clothing that Kurt wears with pride.

When deciding costumes, Rachel had said that because it was set in modern times, wearing their smartest summer clothing would do just fine. She had said it with a grimace and Kurt had agreed – costumes are by far one of his favorite parts of staging a play – but they just couldn't afford to spend any money on new fabric. The outfit that Kurt's chosen will work perfect for Benedick in their play.

He walks quickly back to the theater and while he ignores all the attempts to talk from the people milling around the entrance, Kurt notices with a relieved sigh that the rain from that morning has stopped. It's mid afternoon and the sun is high in the blue sky and the only reminder that the morning started out gray are the drying puddles on the cobblestones.

That has to be a good omen.

Blaine, Mercedes, Rachel and Sam – who obviously arrived after Kurt left – are waiting nervously in the large dressing room backstage. Rachel has changed into her full costume and is sitting at one of the large mirrors powdering her nose. She is the only one who doesn't jump up with surprise when Kurt walks inside.

Blaine, still holding onto Kurt's jacket, is at Kurt's side almost instantly, "Kurt, is everything okay?" he asks, looking worried as well as nervous. "We still need to-"

Kurt shakes his head and Blaine stops immediately. Taking a deep breath, Kurt says, "I'll do it. I'll be Benedick."

Rachel turns around, her hair flying over her shoulder and brushing against the mirror. Blaine gives a smile but there's still worry in his eyes. Mercedes and Sam move in closer, Mercedes with a joyous smile on her lips and she opens her mouth to speak but Kurt interrupts again.

"But," he says, raising a finger and looking at all of them, "I'm only doing this because the show must go on. As seen from previous experience, this is probably not going to end well."

"Don't be silly Kurt," Rachel says. She finally stands up and walks over to join the crowd around Kurt. "You are going to be a fantastic Benedick. And anyone who doesn't see that just isn't a real connoisseur of theatre."

Rachel reaches out and throws her arms around Kurt's neck, drawing him in close for a hug. Needing to feel some reassurance after the emotional turmoil of the last hour and a half, Kurt hugs her tightly. Rachel is pushy and her words sent him into that turmoil but she's still his best friend and it helps his chattering nerves somewhat.

"Now," Rachel says matter-of-factly after she lets Kurt go, "me, you and Blaine need to do our make-up. Opening night is only an hour or two away."

The theater is finally full of people who are eagerly waiting to see the play on stage. The band is playing soft music to welcome everyone inside. The lamps are lit at the end of the rows of seats and in the boxes, and the audience are checking their tickets against the row and seat number to make sure they are sitting in the seat they paid for.

Kurt is peering through one of the gaps in the curtains, standing just at the edge of the wings. His heart is pounding and he's sure that anyone who is standing remotely close to him can hear the rapid heartbeat. Now that the time is here, he can't really believe what happened this morning. He left his apartment after he woke expecting to be supporting Rachel and Blaine and instead he'll be sharing the stage with them.
The nerves and memories have crept back in and while Kurt knows full well that he can't back out now, he really wants to.

"Are you sure you're okay?" Blaine asks, coming up behind Kurt and resting a hand in the middle of Kurt's back. "You look like you're about to rip the curtain from the rail."

Kurt looks down at his hands and sees that his knuckles have gone white while he grips onto the fabric. "Oh," he says and lets the curtain fall out of his hands. "And I'm fine. Just a little nervous."

Looking over his shoulder at Blaine, Kurt sees the disbelieving look on his face and has to agree. Kurt isn't just a little nervous and it is obvious.

"I just don't want this to go wrong and have it be all my fault," Kurt says quickly, as if saying it fast will hurt less, "Those people out there are just going to laugh when they see someone like me playing a character like Benedick."

"No they won't Kurt," Blaine says immediately. "They will be amazed by how talented you are, and how great your portrayal of Benedick is. Anyone who laughs will be laughing out of delight, not mockery."

Kurt turns around and steps closer to Blaine. His hair is neatly gelled on his head, which isn't different to how he wears it normally, and he's wearing a blue bow tie around his neck. With a quick tug to the right side, Kurt straightens it and then nods his approval.

"Thank you," he says, looking up in Blaine's amber eyes.

But anything he was going to say is interrupted by a voice saying, "Hey kiddo, Mercedes told me that you-"

Kurt turns to look at Dad, stepping away from Blaine. He feels his cheeks blush, not having realized just how close he and Blaine had been standing. "Dad," he says and his eyes flick from Dad to Blaine. It's not like they doing anything wrong: they were just standing very close.

Blaine rests his hand on Kurt's elbow and says, "I'll leave you two." With a nod at Kurt and then at Dad, he leaves them.

Dad looks at Kurt with one eyebrow raised and in response Kurt feels his cheeks heat up even more. "You two seem close," Dad says with a tease in his voice.

Teasing from his Dad, however loving, is something that Kurt doesn't want right now. The nerves in his stomach are twisting and tumbling and he's spending all his energy on keeping the mocking laughter out of his ears.

He looks at the wooden floorboards under his feet and shakes his head, as much to clear the blush as to change the subject with Dad. "I guess Mercedes told you that I'm acting tonight," he says when he looks back up at Dad.

Dad nods. "Yeah kiddo, she did," he says, taking the cue to change the subject. He walks closer, rests his hands on Kurt's shoulders and says, "I wanted to come back here to tell you how proud of you I am. Taking this role at the last minute after what's happened to you in the past. It's so wonderful and I'm going to be watching you with so much pride from the seats."

Kurt moves into Dad's embrace, tucking his head over Dad's shoulder and closing his eyes as he feels Dad's arms surround him. "Thanks, Dad," he whispers and the Hummels stand still for a few moments, the sounds of the audience settling into their seats around them.

"What's the phrase Rachel uses?" Dad asks after their hug, his eyebrows furrowing in confusion, "Break an arm?"
Kurt laughs and says, "It's 'break a leg', Dad."

Dad nods and gives Kurt a smile that doesn't fail to make him return it full fold. "Well, you break a leg kiddo. I'll be the one in the front giving the standing ovation."

With another quick and tight hug, Dad turns and leaves Kurt standing by the curtain. The nerves are ever-present but Kurt doesn't resume staring through the gap in the fabric. He stands and waits in the wings, pacing in a small circle when the nerves make him want to fidget and passes the time between opening the theater doors and beginning the show.

Footsteps against the wooden stage make Kurt look up and Rachel hurries over to him, running as fast as her heeled shoes will let her. She looks nervous now and that only makes Kurt's stomach clench even more. He's suddenly glad he hasn't had anything to eat since the pastry: he'd probably have thrown it up by now.

Rachel being nervous is never a good thing.

"Kurt," she says when she reaches him, keeping her voice quiet so she's not overheard by anyone standing too close to the stage. "I've just seen someone walk into the theater with Isabelle Wright, and I think you need to see who it is."

She walks back across the stage, dragging Kurt the way she came and stops at the other end of the curtain. There's another gap in the curtains on the right side of the stage but when Kurt moves to peer through it, Rachel stops him.

"Although, I don't want to make you more nervous," she says, the concern for Kurt now shining through her own nerves at seeing the newcomer.

Blaine is also standing by the gap in the curtains, waiting stage right with the other automatons and where Kurt should be for his cue to walk on the stage but he's not peering through the curtains. He looks curiously from Rachel to Kurt but doesn't say anything.

"Now I have to know," Kurt says, barely glancing at Blaine and Rachel dutifully steps aside.
Kurt peers through the curtain, searching until he finds the box where Isabelle is sat. She's wearing different clothes to what she was wearing when Kurt saw her earlier than day and is talking animatedly with her companion. Kurt gasps, clapping a hand to his mouth when he recognizes who she's talking to.

"Oh my dear god," Kurt mumbles through his hand. He'd recognize the bedazzled coat and matching silk top hat anywhere.

"Who is it?" Blaine asks, trying to look through the small gap over Kurt's shoulder.

"Starchild," Kurt whispers. Blaine makes a questioning sound, as if he's never heard of the famous actor, and Kurt explains, "Elliott Gilbert, aka Starchild. He's an actor on Broadway who only ever accepts the most challenging roles and performs them to adoring crowds who will wait months to see him."

"He's played almost every Shakespeare role there is, and he's even performed in musicals for the aristocrats in New York and Los Angeles," Rachel adds, her voice high and tight with nerves.

Kurt straightens, taking his eyes away from Starchild and staring at Rachel. His chest feels constricted, like his jacket is suddenly four sizes too small. "I can't go on now," he says, his voice cracking, "Starchild has seen professionals perform Much Ado, and has been a professional performing Much Ado. I'm certainly going to look like an untalented fool in his eyes."

Rachel takes his hands but before she can say anything the background noise and accompanying music in the theater stops. Footsteps sound on the stage just in front of the curtains and they stop when Mercedes reaches center stage.

"Welcome to the April Rhodes Civic Pavilion," she says in a voice that booms throughout the theater.

"Oh god," Kurt says, turning away from the stage and debating running back into the wings and hiding for the rest of the performance.

"Kurt," Rachel whispers, "you'll be fine. I believe in you and you, Blaine and I will get through this night together. I'm sure Starchild won't mind that it's a little rough."

Kurt looks back at Rachel to see her glance nervously at the stage. April and Tina are already standing center stage in the positions needed to begin the play, with half of the other automatons around them like an entourage. Rachel turns to Kurt and says one last thing before walking out to take her place with them.

"We'll be fine. You'll see."

Kurt watches her walk away, smoothing down her skirt and taking a deep breath. He'd believe her a little more if she hadn't looked so nervous as she's spoken.

"There's is one change to the program that you were expecting," Mercedes is saying. Blaine takes Kurt's hand in the wings, lacing their fingers together and squeezing. The warmth from Blaine's hand settles the jarring nerves but Kurt still can't breathe properly.

"Tonight, and for the foreseeable future," Mercedes says, using the exact words they'd discussed at length moments before opening the doors to the audience, "The role of Benedick will not be played by the clockwork actor you were expecting. Instead, the role will be played by Mr Kurt Hummel."

There is a small amount of polite applause after Mercedes pauses, and Kurt can feel his breath hitch. Their applause could be minutes away from being mocking laughter, a sound that Kurt knows will never leave his ears if he hears it in his own theater.

"And now, I am overjoyed to present the Hummel and Berry production of Much Ado About Nothing," Mercedes says and the footsteps sound again. The curtain rustles as she steps behind it, smiling widely and not noticing how pale Kurt looks in the candlelight.

She walks to the front of the stage and pulls at the cords that control the curtains. They swing open to reveal the stage and the audience gives a long applause at the sight. Two automatons standing grouped together with Rachel in front of a beautiful painting of a manor house. Sam's lighting illuminates the three characters and a second light turns on just in time to catch Sunshine as she walks from the left wings towards the group in the middle.

She's reached the group when the applause stops and, timing it perfectly, hands a letter to April with the theater in utter silence.

The opening scene of the play passes without anything amiss. Rachel has performed this scene over and over again, changing the order of appearance of the characters and who will be onstage with them. She delivers her lines flawlessly, just as Kurt has seen her do far too many times over the past three months.

Kurt's entrance is approaching and he's glad they've chosen a play where the entrance of his character is surrounded by all the other characters. At least he won't be walking into the spotlight by himself.

"He is sooner caught than the pestilence, and the taker runs presently mad. God help the noble Claudio!" Rachel says to the laughter of the audience, "If he have caught the Benedick, it will cost him a thousand pound ere he be cured."

Blaine tugs on their hands, pulling Kurt further into the wings and into position. The moment has come. He leans in and whispers in Kurt's ear, "Break a leg, Kurt." His breath brushes against Kurt's skin and it sends a shiver down his spine that has nothing to do with nerves.

Kurt smiles and whispers, "You too. Break a leg, Blaine."

"I will hold friends with you, lady." Sunshine says.

"Do, good friend," Rachel replies, laughing first with Tina and then with April.

"You will never run mad, neice," April says, her hands on her copper hips and the gaze on her copper face so maternal that it is hard to believe it is a clockwork automaton acting.

"No, not till a hot January," Rachel says and laughs again. Her eyes flick to the wings where Kurt is standing.

The automatons around Kurt and Blaine start moving at the exact same time, following Jake out into the open stage. Blaine and Kurt are walking just behind Jake, Blaine further downstage than Kurt. He's grateful for that as it gives him a small amount of protection from the eyes of the audience. At least for the small amount of time before his first line.

"Don Pedro is approached," Sunshine says over the applause the audience is giving them as the new characters join the play. As one, Rachel and the automatons bow to greet the new characters.

Being on stage for the first time in years is strange for Kurt. He feels hot, from the glare of the lights and the stares of the audience. The nerves are strong, dancing through his body like a lightning bolt. However, they aren't crippling like they were only hours ago. Now Kurt feels alive. The laughter is still ringing in his ears, but it's muted. It's as if being on stage and in a situation Kurt has wanted to be in, but in the recent past has believed he'll never get there, has stopped the memories from being so powerful.

"Good Signora Leonata," Jake says and Kurt sighs with relief. The first change of name and gender for the character had been difficult for the automaton: Kurt had had to tinker with Jake's thought-processor multiple times before he said 'Leonata' throughout the entire play, "are you come to meet your trouble? The fashion of the world is to avoid cost, and you encounter it."

April rises from her bow first, and says, "Never came trouble to my house in the likeness of your Grace; for trouble being gone, comfort should remain; but when you depart from me, sorrow abides and happiness takes his leave."

April and Jake step closer and embrace, the meeting of the metal of their bodies going smoothly and with as little jarring metal-hitting-metal sound as possible. At that cue, the rest of the characters who had been bowing rise and watch the meeting with polite interest.

"You embrace your charge too willingly," Jake says, and then turns to Tina. He holds out his hand to take Tina's and bows low to press a metal kiss to her knuckles. Perfectly on cue, Blaine gasps with delight as Claudio sees Hero for the first time in the play.

"I think this is your daughter," he says with a nod to April.

"Her father hath many times told me so," April says and the audience laugh as one.
Kurt steps forward, moving to stand close to the small group. He passes Blaine on his way to center stage and can't help but glance at Rachel, who discreetly gives him a tiny smile of encouragement.

He takes a deep breath and says his first line, "Were you in doubt, madam, that you asked him?"

Kurt waits and he hears laughter. For a second he freezes, his face schooled in the mocking expression of Benedick's but he can't move. The audience are laughing. And it's not his memories: this is real laughter.

But then Jake says, "You have it full, Benedick. We may guess by this what you are, being a man. Truly the lady mothers herself. Be happy, lady; for you are like an honourable mother."

The laughter has stopped. Kurt takes a deep breath and delivers his second line as quickly as he can, "If Signora Leonata be her mother, she would not have her head on her shoulders for all Messina, as like her as she is."

There's no more laughter and a voice in the back of his mind shouts at him to carry on. The first of the many Benedick and Beatrice scenes is moments away from starting and this is no time to freeze after hearing the audience laugh.

Especially as the laughter was not mocking and was not laughter at Kurt's acting. Much Ado is a comedy and somewhere in the midst of his nerves, Kurt forgot that the audience will be laughing during the play.

He relaxes and the feeling of the joy of life floods through him again. Rachel is walking closer now, standing next to Tina and says, "I wonder that you will still be talking, Signior Benedick. Nobody marks you."

"What, my dead Lady Disdain! Are you yet living?" Kurt says, loud enough for his voice to boom around the theater. The familiar feeling of enjoying the spotlight and the attention is returning from wherever Kurt had hidden it after the last of his attempted auditions. Kurt glances into the audience, his face turning away from Rachel like they had planned, and sees Dad and Carole in the front, beaming and his nerves shrink a little more.

"Is it possible Disdain should die while she hath such meet food to feed it as Signior Benedick?" Rachel says, one hand on her hip. "Courtesy itself must convert to disdain if you come in her presence."

This is a scene that Kurt and Rachel had rehearsed in the late afternoon before the doors opened. Kurt had known he could perform it but Rachel had insisted on rehearsing one final time for this scene and the scene in the chapel after the failed wedding of Claudio and Hero. And the scene they are performing now runs as smoothly as it has ever done, even including the pauses Kurt and Rachel are forced to give for the laughter of the audience.

After a few minutes, the stage has emptied except for Kurt and Blaine. Kurt walks over to a table laden with cups and empty water pitchers and pours himself a glass. Taking a long sip of the empty cup, Kurt waits for Blaine to say his first line.

"Benedick," Blaine says, coming close to the table but standing far enough away that they aren't crowded in a small corner, "didst thou note the daughter of Signora Leonata?"

It's the same scene Kurt and Blaine had been rehearsing when Blaine had fainted because his pacemaker failed. Kurt will remember that moment for a long time, so as he and Blaine flawlessly move through their lines, it helps calm any residual nerves in Kurt's stomach.

Jake joins them again after a few minutes and the three walk around the stage discussing Claudio's feelings for Hero. "-and in such great letter as they write 'Here is good horse to hire'," Kurt says as he approaches his last few lines in this scene, "let them signify under my sign 'Here you may see Benedick the married man.'"

"In the meantime, Signior Benedick," Jake says, as he places a hand on Kurt's shoulder, "repair to Leonata's, commend me to her and tell her I will not fail her at supper; for indeed she hath made great preparation."

Kurt bows, throwing his hands out to his sides in a mocking gesture, and says "And so I leave you."

He walks off towards the left of the stage and into Rachel's open arms. The smile on her face is wide and contagious and Kurt is smiling moments later.

"Kurt that was fantastic," she says in a whisper but the happiness, sincerity and pride in her voice is obvious, "I knew you would be wonderful."

Kurt doesn't say anything in reply but he doesn't lose his smile either. In the course of less than fifteen minutes, his nerves at taking the stage for the first time in years have vanished and he feels exactly like he did when he left school before all those failed auditions. He loves the feeling of being on stage and having hundreds of people watching him perform. Acting has been the one thing that gave Kurt true joy and until he stepped on that stage, he had forgotten that.

A small voice tells him that they still have a long play to perform and there are still plenty of opportunities for the audience to turn against him, especially in the scene where Benedick and Beatrice will kiss, but Kurt resolutely ignores that voice and watches Blaine and Jake on stage.

Kurt's dream was never really to own a theater: it was to be the one standing on stage in front of adoring crowds. And somewhere along the way to that dream, Kurt just forgot. Or perhaps he was made to forget, with the numerous terrible experiences throughout his auditions.

But he been reminded, as if a lightning bolt has run right through him, and Kurt never wants to forget this feeling of being alive again.

The one scene that Kurt was worried about dragging up the memories of his auditions even after his epiphany arrives far quicker than he wants. The part of the play between the intermission and now has gone by in a flash and now Rachel has moved to the part of the stage where she'll stand for the beginning of their scene and Kurt is waiting for his cue.

Unique is in the middle of walking off the stage, her hands around April's shoulders and taking everyone except for Kurt and Rachel with her. Kurt takes a deep breath to steady himself as he hears her say, "This wedding day perhaps is but prolonged. Have patience, and endure."

That's the cue he has been waiting for. Kurt waits until they have completely cleared the stage but turning to look at Rachel. Sam – who had hurried down to the backstage area during the intermission to give his own congratulations and wishes of luck for the second half of the play – slowly illuminates the stage where Rachel is standing and has been weeping.

"Lady Beatrice, have you wept all this while?" Kurt says, walking over to stand next to Rachel.

"Yea, and I will weep a while longer," Rachel says, wiping at the tears under her eyes. More fall down her cheeks and Kurt is struck for a moment at how dedicated Rachel is to her part, and how the acting school and theater troupes were fools to turn her down as well, claiming she was too young and too green for any roles they have available.

Both he and Rachel were wrongly passed over during their many years of auditioning for everything that came along. And now, with the eyes of a hundred people watching him, Kurt can freely admit it.

There is a slow build up of declarations of love from both Kurt and Rachel before the moment Kurt's been dreading. They had planned to walk slowly from the right side of the stage, where the scene begins, to the center for the climax of the scene and it's only when Kurt is following Rachel does he feel the panic inside.
He's been in a similar situation before, something he doesn't like to talk about often. He didn't mention it in detail when he was telling Blaine about his past audition experiences and both Rachel and Mercedes know not to bring it up.

"A very even way, but no such friend," Rachel says, still with her back to Kurt so she's blissfully unaware of his internal panic.

He had been auditioning for the romantic lead for a troupe that travelled mainly around the East Coast. Kurt had figured that that would have been the best way to get to New York, so he had auditioned for the role even though it was an original play that wasn't that good. But when he'd met his scene partner for the audition and they'd appeared on stage in front of the directors, it had taken mere minutes for them to dissolve into laughter at the thought of Kurt playing their romantic lead. He'd tried to continue, but going in for the scripted kiss, his scene partner had laughed in his face.

That one experience is the reason Kurt still heard the mocking laughter in his nightmares, and in the build up to agreeing to take the part tonight. He doesn't think Rachel will laugh – she might have done when they were young and naive but not now – but the memory is too strong in his mind for comfort.

He controls his breathing, keeps as much of his panic in check as he can and says each line in turn as the scene progresses. Eventually Rachel turns around and Kurt knows he must look a state: paler than normal, his eyes wider than normal and a very slight tremble in his hand as he reaches out to take Rachel's.

"And do it with all thy heart," Kurt says, less than a minute away from their kiss now

Rachel squeezes his hand and looks at him with eyes that aren't Beatrice's. They are full of support and love for a friend, and it does comfort him somewhat. If the audience laughs because someone like Kurt is about to kiss someone like Rachel, then everything he's discovered tonight will be for nothing. And the opposite is true as well: but the positive thought isn't in Kurt's mind at the moment.

"I love you with so much of my heart that none is left to protest," Rachel says, flowing perfectly back into character.

Kurt tugs on their joined hands, pulling Rachel towards him and pressing his lips to hers in one smooth movement. Kissing Rachel – his friend for years – would be strange enough but it's on stage and in front of an audience. A hundred and more eyes are fixed on him and on Rachel and there are even a few cheers of delight as he lifts his lips away from Rachel's.

But, most importantly, there is no laughter. Rachel doesn't look like she's trying to hold in her giggles, there is no quiet hum of mirth coming from the eagerly watching audience: nothing else to remind him that he once kissed a scene partner during an audition and it led to disaster. His scene partner and the theater troupe auditioners must have been so wrong with their judgements and Kurt files that realization away.

Only more fuel to his fire that burns brightly with the truth that he really does belong on the stage.

For Kurt at least, the rest of the play flies by in blur. Almost like he has just woken up from a deep sleep and the rest of the play was as fast and as elaborate as a dream. Blaine says afterwards that he remembers every second of it and Rachel asks over and over again how Kurt could forget.

But it's not that he's forgotten the play, and what happened while he was on stage. It's that he became completely absorbed that all he was concentrating on was the progression of the storyline. He didn't even have to think about which of his lines came next: it flowed as easily as if he'd been practicing for years.

The one part of the play that Kurt doesn't remember in perfect clarity is when Blaine kneels before the masked Tina and asks for her hand in marriage. It was the first line spoken when testing the newly repaired automaton and there's a certain amount of poetry in seeing the line performed again, on stage with an adoring audience watching.

"Give me your hand before this holy friar," Blaine says, hand reaching out to Tina, "I am your husband if you like of me."

"And when I lived, I was your other wife;" Tina says, lifting her free hand to remove the sheer white veil – the exact same movement she'd done after being wound and awoken for the first time in years – "And when you loved, you were my other husband."

The audience is silent except for one girl, who gasps loudly with delight as Tina is revealed. It takes far too much willpower to stop Kurt from laughing along with the other people in the audience at the young girl's enjoyment.

"Another Hero!" Blaine says, still kneeling before Tina.

"Nothing certainer," Tina says, "One Hero died defiled: but I do live. And surely as I live, I am a maid."

Blaine stands and embraces her, smiling widely for the benefit of the audience over her shoulder. But as April, Jake and Unique carry on talking, Blaine changes where he's looking. He looks right at Kurt and the smile on his lips is more genuine. That moment isn't lost on Blaine, and when Kurt looks at Rachel a moment later, her soft smile tells him that the moment isn't lost on Rachel either.

The applause is deafening when the curtains lower for the final time, the tune from the band playing loudly to announce the end of the show. Kurt wonders whether dust and debris will be knocked from the ceiling because the theater hasn't had such raucous applause inside it for years. Certainly not since the theater was re-opened a year ago.

Rachel barely gives Kurt enough time to breathe after the last line before she's thrown her arms around his neck in a hug that threatens to squeeze the life from him.

"That was amazing, Kurt!" she says loudly right into his ear. "We saved our theater! And you were so great out there."

Kurt, riding off the emotions and adrenaline of the full play, laughs at her words. But he hugs her back just as fiercely, tucking his chin over her shoulder. She's right: the applause and the noise of cheering from the other side of the curtains makes it painfully obvious how much the people watching enjoyed the play. Kurt knows how the gossip mill works, especially in a town full of people who are visiting for the summer. Word of how much people enjoyed the opening night of the play in the April Rhodes Civic Pavilion will spread through Lima and Kurt reckons that by tomorrow there will be people knocking on the door for tickets.

"I think I forgot how much I loved acting," he says, when Rachel has let him go and is staring at him with a wide smile. "Being on stage tonight has reminded me that my dream was acting; getting to Broadway; having my name be as popular as Starchild's is. It wasn't in a garage or in the wings."

Kurt feels someone take his hand and looks up to see Blaine's hand linked with his own. But it's Rachel who speaks, saying, "Good. You're Kurt Hummel and you deserve to be in the limelight. And now, you can be where you belong: on the stage, with me and with Blaine and with your automatons."

Kurt laughs at Rachel and gives her a hug again, not saying how much her support tonight has helped him. Kurt also squeezes Blaine's hand in gratitude and feels the familiar shiver run up his arm from their linked hands. He doesn't have a chance to say anything about how great Blaine was tonight because Mercedes whistles, gets their attention and pulls on the curtain cord to raise it again.

For a moment, Kurt can't believe his eyes. The people who have sat through nearly two hours of their acting are on their feet and applauding with such vigour that it must be hurting their hands.

Blaine bow and Rachel curtseys and it's only the fact that Kurt is still holding onto their hands that makes him bow as well. They have never had such applause before: Kurt can't remember a time when he ever saw an audience give the performers a standing ovation like this before. Everyone is on their feet, not just the enthusiastic or the family members in the audience. Everyone that Kurt can see has a wide smile on their face and some are even cheering as Rachel drags Kurt down for a second bow.

Blaine steps back then and applauds Kurt and Rachel himself. Kurt follows him for a moment and seeing the blinding smile on Blaine's face, shouting without words about how he feels about the show they staged for tonight.

The third time, Kurt manages to remember and dips a bow to the audience. Rachel goes so far as to raise their joined hands into the air and Kurt swears the applause increases in noise, although he hadn't thought that would have been possible. As the curtain drops for a second and final time, Rachel turns to Kurt and gives him another hug, squeezing just as tightly and saying something into his ear that he just can't hear over the cheering.

With the curtains down and staying closed, the applause dies away and a cacophony of voices fills the air. Kurt can hear the audience members move around, no doubt shuffling out of their rows to make their way into the aisle and out of the theater.

"Come on," Rachel says, her voice filled with contagious excitement. "We should go out there. Then they can tell us exactly how wonderful we were."

"Rachel I'm sure most of them just want to go home," Kurt says but he goes along with the plan and allows himself to be dragged out in front of the curtain again. He's right about most of the people slowly leaving the theater but there are still many people hanging around, talking to their neighbors and waiting patiently for something.

Kurt spots Dad and Carole amongst the people waiting even before he's dragged down the steps from the stage to the front of house. Rachel leads the way over to them, beaming at her fathers who have been sitting with Dad and Carole for the play.

"Sweetheart, that was-" one of the Mr Berrys says but Kurt doesn't hear the rest of it because his Dad has thrown his arms around him in a large hug, squeezing him tightly in what must be a fashion for Kurt tonight.

"Kurt you were amazing up there," Dad says quietly into his ear.

"Thanks Dad," Kurt says, his voice muffled because his face is buried in Dad's shoulder.

Not letting him go, Dad says, "I always knew you were meant for that. You're something fantastic kiddo, not someone meant to stay tinkering in a garage."

Kurt pulls away from the hug but not so far away that he steps out of Dad's arms. He's twenty-five but there's something he can't stop loving about Dad's hugs. "What?" he asks.

"Seeing you up there," Dad says, his voice only loud enough to carry to Kurt and Carole, "it's the first time you've really been happy in years. That's where you belong, Kurt, whether here or far away in New York. Now after tonight, I don't want to see you back in the shop unless it's an occasional day helping your old man or fixing those automatons. Got it?"

Dad's face is a myriad of emotions, ranging from pride to joy, from utter seriousness to an element of joking. Kurt can't help but laugh and hug him again, saying, "Okay Dad."

Then there's Carole to hug, who whispers tearfully in his ear that Finn would have loved to have been here to see that. Kurt stays in her embrace for a while after that, not just to have a long hug from a proud stepmother but because he too imagines his stepbrother cheering in the front row with their parents.

Dad, Carole and the Mr Berrys start loudly discussing the play, Rachel tucked under one of her father's arms and Kurt standing next to Dad. They praise everything from the background sets to the costumes for the automatons to their acting.

"Mr Hummel?" a familiar voice calls, taking Kurt's attention from the conversation. He turns around to see Isabelle Wright standing behind him, with Starchild standing beside her.

Kurt's breathe catches in his throat at being so close to one of the most modern household names in theater but he doesn't noticeably falter as he says, "Miss Wright. I hope the play lived up to your expectations."

Isabelle laughs and says, "Oh it was better, Kurt. You were wonderful." She looks over to Rachel to include her in the conversation as well. "As were you, Miss Berry."

"Thank you Miss Wright," Rachel says, "I'm glad you enjoyed it."

Isabelle turns to Starchild next to her, who steps closer as she introduces him. "I haven't introduced my friend, Elliott Gilbert. Elliott, this is Kurt Hummel and Rachel Berry."

Starchild, or Elliott, leans in and offers his hand first to Kurt to shake and then to Rachel. He's beaming at them both, eyes surrounded in dark eyeliner but they still sparkle. "You were both fantastic up there," he says after shaking Rachel's hand. He looks from Kurt to Rachel and then back to Kurt as he speaks. "I love how you used the automatons. I've only seen plays where automatons were used as the chorus, never as main parts. It was so refreshing."

Kurt doesn't correct Starchild's incorrect assumption that they used the automatons like that for a reason. And Rachel doesn't either, saying, "Thank you. We were very lucky to have so many so that we could do just that."

"Where did you find them?" he asks, sounding genuinely interested in the answer.

"They came with the theater," Rachel says cryptically. "Kurt fixed them up and takes care of them."

Starchild looks at Kurt again, still beaming and says, "I'm really impressed. I hope you continue to use them like that: it'll get you a lot of audiences, especially if you tour in New York." He shares a look with Isabelle and then says, "I know I hope to see one of your next plays."

"Oh god," Kurt says, taken aback at hearing someone like Starchild say that. He would have been amazed to hear anyone say that, but those words coming from a Broadway legend seems almost too good to be true. "Thank you so much. We- we'll keep you informed."

"Please do," Starchild says and nods to both Kurt and Rachel again. He turns to look at Isabelle and offers her his arm. "Shall we?" he says and then turns to the group again after Isabelle has slipped her arm through the crook of his elbow. "Excuse us."

"Kurt, we just had Starchild compliment our play," Rachel says, coming over to take Kurt's arm after Starchild and Isabelle have left.

"I know," Kurt says in a breathless tone. But he's in as much of a state of shock as Rachel is. "You were right though. This has so saved our theater."

Rachel laughs loudly, gaining the attention of the remaining people in the theater. Most of them change their direction, walking back towards the stage to shake Kurt's and Rachel's hands, to congratulate them on the performance and to say how they'll recommend the show to their friends as soon as they get home.

Kurt must have shaken over a hundred hands by the time the theater is quiet. Dad, Carole, Mr and Mr Berry and the band members are still there, talking about the evening while they either pack up their instruments or help pick up any stray belongings or lost tickets left behind by the general audience.

For a brief moment, as he looks around the theater again and sees the aftermath of what has been one of the best evenings of his life, Kurt wonders if he's still asleep. If he'll wake up in a moment and it'll be the gray morning that is was earlier and everything that has just happened will be a dream. But he waits, hears the curtain rising and sees that Blaine, Mercedes and Sam have been busy tidying up the stage, and he doesn't wake up. Rachel surprises him by throwing her arms around his waist for what must be well over the tenth time that night and he doesn't wake up.

He even surreptitiously pinches his arm and the small amount of pain shoots through his body and he still doesn't wake up.

Kurt's smile is wide and shows off all his teeth as the truth finally takes root. This hasn't been a dream, he really played the part of Benedick to perfection and he and Rachel really have just saved their theater.

The following morning dawns the complete opposite to yesterday; bright blue skies, a warm sun and not a cloud in sight. Kurt arrives at the theater an hour later than he had yesterday and with none of the emotional baggage of the last few months, let alone weeks.

Blaine arrives soon after, his hands tucked into the pockets of his navy pants and his sleeves rolled up to his elbows to reveal his forearms.

"Hi Kurt," Blaine says cheerfully as he walks into the backstage area where Kurt is, already winding the automatons to make sure that nothing was damaged during last night's performance. Jesse is still in a corner, slumped in the chair like a man asleep. "Have you recovered from last night?"

Kurt laughs, steps away from Kitty and dusts his hands on a nearby cloth. Kitty immediately starts walking around the room, joining Tina and Rory in moving from one wall to the other. "Just about," he says as Blaine walks across the room to join him. "It all seems really strange that that happened yesterday. Like it happened to someone else, or something."

"Well it wasn't a dream," Blaine says with a shrug, "because then I had the same one. You really were great out there. Those people at your auditions didn't know what they were talking about."

"Apparently not," Kurt says with a laugh. Running footsteps stops him from saying anything else and he's surprised when it's Rachel who runs into the room, a rolled up newspaper in her hands. Rachel hasn't been in the theater this early for months now.

"I'm glad you're both here," Rachel says as soon as she sees them, not even bothering to greet either Kurt or Blaine. She shakes out the paper, the rustling gaining the curiosity of the automatons, and then looks up to say, "There's a review of our play in here."

"Already?" Blaine asks as he and Kurt scramble to stand next to Rachel to read the article over her shoulder.

Rather than answering, Rachel shakes out the newspaper again and begins to read the article in the latter half of the paper. "When the April Rhodes Civic Pavilion opened last year for the first time in twenty, nothing happened. The opening went unnoticed, the first play's opening night drew a crowd of less than thirty people and I don't even remember what that particular play was.

"But last night's performance, the opening night of Shakespeare's Much Ado About Nothingwas something indeed. I'd rather call it 'Much Ado About Everything' because last night there really was everything.

"Staged by the new owners, Miss Rachel Berry and Mr Kurt Hummel, the play mostly featured clockwork automatons – self-operating robots – in the main roles. But by the intermission, I'd certainly forgotten that I was watching a cast filled with copper, brass and tin robots rather than real humans. Where automatons like that came from, I have no idea. I haven't seen automatons like that before; ones that move so smoothly and are better actors than many humans we pay to see on stage.

"The human component came from Miss Berry and Mr Hummel in the iconic roles of Beatrice and Benedick, and Mr Blaine Anderson as Claudio. Mr Anderson had the troublesome task of acting opposite an automaton playing Hero. And I've watched many a human pair fail so completely at capturing the love at first sight for the couple. But I do have to agree with the little girl sat next to me who was crying with how in love Claudio was with Hero. It was so easy to forget that Hero was essentially a lifeless robot controlled by clockwork and that's because of Mr Anderson. I can only congratulate him on such hard breakout role because whatever he did worked perfectly last night.

"But the real stars of last night's performance were Benedick and Beatrice, as the British Bard intended. One thing that was definitely going for them was that both parts of the couple were human so they played off each other's strengths and adapted easily and effortlessly to the whims of the audience. Mr Hummel and Miss Berry have added two new names to the short list of people who have played Benedick and Beatrice well but they have made the list without any reservations. Their roles were breakout roles too, but I have a hard time believing that these two haven't acted together before last night. They can own a theater, stage a show and star in it without a single flaw: what more can we expected from Hummel and Berry?

"The audience was enthralled, although that might be because they've never seen so many automatons together in a room before. And have there been better performances of the Bard's plays? Probably. But I can only say that I look forward to the next plays that will come out of the April Rhodes Civic Pavilion, and ask them why it took them a year before producing a play.

"Get down to see Miss Berry, Mr Hummel and Mr Anderson while they're still in Lima because the way last night's performance went, they won't be around here for long. They'll be handed one-way tickets on the fastest airship straight to Broadway. And they'll be taking their automatons with them."

Rachel stops reading and expertly folds up the newspaper in half, and then half again. She looks from Blaine, who is staring at the space where she'd been holding the paper, to Kurt, who is barely blinking as he gazes at the automatons.

"Will one of you say something?" she demands after the silence is a little too long. Kurt is in a state of shock. Again he briefly wonders if he's dreaming. A review that's full of praise like that is one thing he wasn't anticipating: if he's honest, Kurt hadn't even considered what a reviewer might think of their play.

Blaine finds his voice first. "That's probably the best thing that could have happened," he says, finally looking up at Rachel and then focusing on Kurt. "A good review like that and even people who haven't heard by the gossip will want to know more."

"Exactly!" Rachel says. She then turns around to look at Kurt, as if demanding a reply.

"I didn't even expect to be reviewed," Kurt says, still in shock that they've had a review that can only be described as raving. That's the sort of reviews that are found about professional plays in theaters that seat over five hundred people. "That's better than we could have hoped."

"And you have to promise me Kurt," Rachel says, "that you won't think you aren't meant for the stage anymore. It's obvious that you are; it was obvious last night and it's just as obvious this morning. You belong up on stage. You belong up there with me!"

Kurt laughs, throwing one arm around Rachel's shoulders to give her a hug. Rachel reaches out and draws Blaine into the embrace, the three of them together after reading a review that is beyond their wildest dreams. Kurt can feel the heat from Blaine's arm against the small of his back and he leans just a little closer to Blaine, grasping the back of his shirt to help. It's nice with Blaine's arm around his back.

The moment is broken by Tina, who walks to the door of the room and seems to peer out curiously. As the automaton shouldn't be able to do much more than say her lines and respond to the other actors, the fact that she is looking around outside causes first Kurt, then Rachel and Blaine, to break away from their hug and look out of the door.

Nothing is outside but Kurt hears a faint knock. Mumbling about who could be knocking at the door of the theater at such an early hour, Kurt walks back to the front door through the backstage area and the front of house. Blaine is right on his heels and Rachel is not fair behind, having stopped to force Tina back inside the room and close the door to keep the automatons inside.

Kurt opens one of the two doors and his eyebrows snap together when he sees who is standing at the threshold. Marley Rose, the girl who auditioned for him and Rachel months ago and who they have originally cast to play opposite Blaine as Hero, is standing with her hands linked together in front of her and a shy smile on her face.

"I know I've missed this play," she says, "but is there any way I could audition early for your next one?"

However, Kurt doesn't reply immediately. His eyes are fixed on the crowd of people behind Marley, all talking amongst themselves but occasionally looking up at the door. Kurt can tell they've all seen the door open because each person waiting impatiently in line is now dancing on their toes, where they were standing still when Kurt first opened the door.

"What is everyone else doing here?" Rachel asks, also looking over the crowd of people outside their theater.

Marley looks over her shoulder and then back at Kurt, Rachel and Blaine. "I think most of them are here to buy tickets for the next shows," she says, "but I heard a few more people talking about auditions."

It's been less than a day, just over twelve hours, since their play finished. And now they are looking at an ever-growing crowd of interested people, whether for tickets or for potential auditions. Kurt can't believe it. He knew word spreads quickly, especially in a small town like Lima. But this is fast moving information if so many people have been spurred on to buy tickets as soon as they can.

"Well," Rachel says, looking up at Kurt and resting a hand on his arm to gain his attention, "we can stage a play without worrying about the number of roles we'll be able to fill now."

That's one way to put it, Kurt thinks. Then something occurs to him, born by the words of encouragement spoken by Starchild.

Rachel starts by saying, "We can always do A Midsummer's Night Dream. That's an audience favorite, whether rich or not, and it's got a larger cast list than Much Ado About Nothing.

"I don't know," Kurt says, a note of teasing in his voice. He looks down at Rachel, who is still resting her hand on his arm. "I think we should stage our favorite musical instead."

Rachel raises an eyebrow. "What happened to no musicals until we could pay our rent for two years straight?" she asks, although her voice contains excitement at the prospect.

Kurt shrugs. "We've got Starchild talking about us to the aristocrats," he says, "and a rave review in the newspaper. I think it's probably time we start educating the rich about the delights of musical theater."

Rachel actually squeaks with happiness and squeezes Kurt's arm with her hand. She turns away from the door, murmuring to herself under her breath. "I'll be Elphaba of course, and Kurt could be Fiyero. But which part could Blaine play. Maybe Boq?"

Blaine reaches over and slips his hand into Kurt's free one. "I'll be Boq in Wicked," he says quietly in Kurt's ear. A shiver of happiness runs through Kurt as Blaine recognizes the names of the characters and correctly guesses his favorite musical: or it's a shiver from Blaine's breath against his skin, "As long as it's opposite your Fiyero."

"Blaine," Kurt murmurs in reply and he can't help the blush that blooms on his cheeks. He looks into Blaine's shining amber eyes – eyes that he can easily get lost in and will happily do so for hours – and wonders if the blush on Blaine's cheeks is because of what he said or the very slight breeze that is blowing into the doorway from outside. Rather than say anything else, Kurt squeezes his hand and knocks into Blaine's shoulder with his own.

Turning to the group of people outside, Kurt raises his voice and says, "Can I have everyone who wants to purchase tickets for Much Ado About Nothing in a separate line to those wanting to audition. We'll take your names and details to contact you about future auditions, and then we'll start selling tickets for tonight's show and the rest of them."

The people gathered in the cobbled square immediately start to move, forming two lines that don't seem to end. Kurt peers over the heads of the people first in line and can't see the last people in line. With a smile first to Blaine and then to Marley, still at the start of the line for future auditionees, Kurt begins to take their names down.

It's almost like that for past year – even for the past four years – Kurt has been in a limbo. Some place in theater hell where the curtain is always hovering just above the floor of the stage, never rising and so the show can never really start. But as Kurt writes each name on the ever-growing list of auditionees, he can feel that the curtain has risen and that this must be the opening act.

Something that's been a long time coming.

Author's note: I hope you enjoyed reading it as much as I enjoyed writing this! Please check out the artwork for this story, made by two amazing artists freakingpotter and keep-frozen, that I look at and am still speechless at today. They can be found at the masterpost on my tumblr (sundaysalvation) or my LJ (sundayrainbows).

I'd really love to hear what you thought and thank you for reading!