AN: Okay, so this is what came to me on my way back from Microbiology this morning. I'm still undecided if I want to leave it as a one-shot or make it a full on story. Please review and let me know. I have some ideas, but I'll leave it up to you.

As always, thanks Fern! Don't know what I'd do without ya…

Blessings,

bookdiva

She wanted to scream. She wanted to hit something. No, that's a lie. She wanted to hit him. But she couldn't. No, that's a lie too. She could. She'd done it before. But this time, even she couldn't justify it to herself. Not that she could really justify the first time, if she was being honest with herself.

He'd been… perfect.

Damn perfection, she thought to herself as she applied the last of her make up. She didn't need it as much as she'd thought she would, because she'd been sleeping better than she thought she would.

Which brought her back to him. And why she couldn't be angry at him. Unfortunately, that only made her angrier.

When the team had rescued her from that damn cave, she'd been too weak to really do anything more than be a limp noodle in his arms. She found out later from Sam that he'd carried her four miles through the desert and back to camp. Even though he'd had a bullet graze to the arm and several superficial stab wounds to various body parts, he'd refused to let her go.

He'd been silently supportive during her stay in the MedBay of their camp in Afghanistan, and he'd continued on that way for the flight home. He'd stayed with her as her external injuries—which really hadn't been that bad—healed, and he hadn't pushed her for anything.

He'd never said he understood, but understanding was in every move he made. So when he'd finally brought her home from Pacific Beach Hospital—where she'd gone for one more check up to make sure the field doctors hadn't missed anything—he didn't protest when she literally pushed him away and out the door. He just slid down on the door and started to talk.

He'd talked about his adventures with Ray growing up—what she assumed were his few good childhood memories. He told her about law school and stripping and so many things, she sometimes lost track. And every night, they both fell asleep against the door.

She'd always wake up the next morning—he'd be gone, and she'd be left with a crick in her neck, but a full night of sleep. No nightmares.

She wanted to hate him for making her need him like that. She wanted to hate him for handling her much better than she'd handled him after his ordeal. She wanted to scream at him and tell him that she wasn't worth it. But again, she couldn't.

Because she wasn't really angry at him. She was angry at herself. She'd had walls for a reason, and it was high time that they go back up again.

She walked into the bull pen silently, surprised to see her partner already at his desk. The scene—so achingly familiar—almost broke her resolve right then and there. He was sitting at his desk, three empty coffee cups in front of him, completely immersed in a case file. He had dark circles under his eyes, and his usually bright smile was noticeably absent.

She seriously considered running for the hills, but just at that moment, he looked up. His eyes tightened, but he managed a strained smile.

"Good morning Kensi," he said softly.

She couldn't force words over the lump in her throat, so she just nodded. It had been Kensi every time he'd addressed her. No Fern, Sugarbear, Princess… no nicknames whatsoever. And she hated it.

But unfortunately, she didn't hate him.

She sat at her desk, wondering how in the world they were going to

"Look, Kensi, there's—"

"I'm telling you, it was car trouble," Callen's voice cut Deeks off. Kensi released a relieved sigh and turned to greet Sam and Callen.

"Well then I think it's time for a new car," Sam shot back. "You seem to be having 'car troubles' a lot lately."

Callen laughed and shook his head, but he smiled when he saw Kensi.

"Hey Kens!" he said, moving to sit at his desk next to her. "It's good to have you back!"

"Good to be back," Kensi said with a relieved smile. She glanced over at Sam, but the big man was ignoring her and worriedly looking over at Deeks who had turned his full attention back on the case report in his hands.

Sam turned back to her, but his knowing frown made Kensi feel like a child again.

"Glad you're back safe, Kensi," Sam said softly. Kensi just nodded, again not trusting herself to speak.

Eric's whistle broke the tense silence in the bull pen.

"We got a case," he said. All four members immediately jumped up. "Prepare yourself, guys," Eric warned. "It's a… bad one."

Kensi led the way up the stairs, thankful for the distraction of a case.

"This is DEA agent Brain Samuels," Nell said once everyone was settled in OPS. "He was found dead in a warehouse by the docks. There was a camera in the room, and this is what was on the tape."

A video appeared on screen. Brian Samuels was tied to a chair, his mouth held open with the same type of contraption that Siderov had used on Deeks. There was blood running down his face, and his breathing was labored. Kensi felt Deeks tense all the way across the room, and she couldn't help but shoot him a concerned glance. He just stared straight ahead, watching the video intently.

"This is what happens to American Agents who don't do as they're told," a heavily accented Russian voice said over the camera. Then, a single gun shot was delivered to Agent Samuels's head, and the screen cut to black. The OPS room was full of tense silence for a long moment.

"God, the Russians really love their drills, don't they?" Deeks tried to joke, but it fell flat to everyone in the room.

"He was 35 years old. No family, no children." Nell paused. "His partner, Kacey Black, was his emergency contact and next of kin."

"Has she been notified?" Callen asked.

"She hasn't answered her cell phone," Nell replied. "But GPS on her car shows that she's still at her house."

Callen nodded.

"Sam and I will go and check out the crime scene," Callen said. "Kensi, Deeks, you two go find Kacey Black. Notify her, and see if they were working anything that could've gotten Samuels killed."

The ride to visit Kacey was so unusual it literally caused Kensi's heart to hurt. It was completely silent, and Deeks drove, which almost never happened. He didn't reach over to take her hand, and he didn't shoot her any looks with those damn blue eyes of his.

Kensi could see that Deeks was fighting with his own demons, and she longed to comfort him the way he'd been comforting her. But she didn't know how, and the distance between them suddenly just seemed too wide.

By the time they pulled up at Kacey's house, Kensi still wasn't sure if she was grateful or angry for the silence. She got out of the car, slamming the door with a little more force than was necessary. She heard Deeks sigh as he too exited the car, though with much more self-control.

Kensi clenched her jaw and strode forward, not giving her partner a second glance. He fell into step behind her, but it was nothing like they'd been in the past. There was no playful banter, no teasing, no stories about creative ways to pay for college…

Kensi knocked twice on the door and paused, waiting for an answer.

"I'm coming, Sam," a woman's voice—who Kensi assumed to be Kacey's—came through the door. The door was pulled open, looking down and rummaging about in her purse. "It's our day off, and I still don't know how you got me to agree to—"

She stopped short when she noticed Kensi and Deeks standing in front of her.

"Oh, I'm sorry. I thought you were…" she shook her head and her smile changed. "Never mind. What can I help you with?"

"Are you Kacey Black?" Deeks asked. Kensi had to hold back a shiver as his breath ghosted over her exposed neck.

Her brows knit together, and she hesitantly nodded her head. Kensi took a deep breath, and spoke.

"I'm Special Agent Kensi Blye, NCIS, and this is my partner Detective—"

"Special Agent Marty Deeks," Deeks cut her off, flashing his badge. "NCIS."

Kensi gasped and spun around to look at Deeks, but he was staring straight ahead.

"It's a new title," he explained to Kacey, who just nodded her head slowly. "We have some things we need to talk to you about. Can we come in?"

Kacey nodded and stepped aside, holding the door open for them.

Kensi watched as her partner stepped inside behind Kacey, but she was paralyzed. She couldn't move. She could barely breathe.

He's an Agent. He joined… when did he… was it… it couldn't… not after I…

"Come on, Kensi," Deeks hissed under his breath. "We're working."

Kensi just shook her head. She somehow managed to make her legs move her forward, one step at a time, and she followed her partner and Kacey Black into the house.

Again, thanks for reading and please review! Also, hopefully Hey Baby will be updated soon :)