DIC-less SI

Day 1

John bowed to the class and took his seat, noting it was little cramped, when he felt the eyes of several people on him, Ami Mizuno and Usagi Tsukino among them. It took a moment for the reality of the situation to sink in.

'I'm in Sailor Moon?' John thought to himself in shock as he tried to look like nothing was wrong. Fortunately teenage boys were usually a bit twitchy so the rapid play of emotions on his face wasn't commented on.

John paid careful attention to everything as he tried to get his bearings. 'Ok, I'm in Sailor Moon… I got nothing. I've only watched a few shows and I'm a lot more familiar with the fanon than the canon! Well at least I'm not in the Dic version as they've all got Japanese names even if we are speaking English, or do I just think we are?' He didn't bother to take notes as the classwork was easy enough to do for someone who'd graduated from high school. History was going to be a problem though.

"Puberty was enough of a pain the first time around and now I gotta do an encore?" John grumbled to himself. He recalled getting into far too many sticky situations listening to his hormones from about ten to…well he'd been hopeful they'd stop one day.

Lunch rolled around and he heaved a sigh of relief as he stood up and stretched before grabbing his things and going outside to eat and look through his stuff hoping they'd spark a memory or three. Going through his backpack and wallet he discovered where he lived and a helpful map with all the local points of interest for him marked down. He was pretty sure the map was copied from a Minako dating sim he'd played and really hoped that wasn't an omen for the future. Not that there was really anything wrong with Minako, but she was so perky and energetic that he'd die of exhaustion just trying to keep up with her, not to mention he planned on avoiding the scouts together if he could manage it.

"Hey!" a bright and cheerful voice burst in on his musings.

"Wah!" he yelped, jumping about half a foot.

"Sorry," Minako apologized. "I didn't mean to startle you; I just wanted to ask you to come eat with me and my friends."

John looked over at where Minako was pointing and sure enough there was Ami, Usagi, and Makoto waving at him.

"Sure," John said readily, not wanting to get on the bad side of a group with enough magical firepower to level city blocks on a whim.

Introductions were quick since they all knew who he was from class and the inners were missing Rei, who attended a Catholic school for some odd reason. Ami was a bit shy, not all that comfortable meeting new people, but making an effort to be friendly. Usagi was as open and friendly as a puppy. John got the impression that not being her friend would take a lot of effort and she'd probably wear you down in the end anyway. Was pathologically friendly an actual medical diagnosis? Minako was as perky as it was possible to be, barring those who have chemical help involving a razor blade and a small mirror. John was sure the brief image he got of himself as a little white rabbit while she was a golden furred wolf was just his imagination…really. Makoto was less intense than Minako and almost as friendly as Usagi. It was a welcome contrast to the two, plus, she had cookies.

Small talk lasted exactly five minutes, long enough to be polite, but timed to the second, he was willing, to bet by the curious girls.

"So tell us about yourself," Makoto ordered, thankful she'd finally found a guy taller than herself, even if he wasn't Japanese and wore glasses.

"Not much to tell really," John said with a shrug, since he didn't really know what his backstory was at this point.

"Oh come on," Usagi encouraged him. "I'm sure you have tons of interesting stories to tell."

"Probably," John said agreeably. 'But I seem to be missing large chunks of my memory, so I have no idea what they are."

"What?!" the girls chorused in shock.

"I remember today's events and my school work just fine, but except for some odds and ends my past is a blank," he offered having decided memory loss was safer to claim than being a dimensional traveler.

"At least you remember everything you learned in class," Ami said consolingly.

"I can't believe you have Magnesia," Minako groaned.

"Amnesia," Ami and John chorused.

"Can you remember your family at all?" Usagi asked tearfully.

"No parents and siblings didn't much care, so they just wandered off. Not sure about grandparents, but the last memory I have of them is of them being very, very old. "

"So who do you live with?" Makoto asked.

"No idea. I remember today and some of the distant past, but that's all," John admitted.

"How are you going to find your way home?!" Usagi demanded worriedly.

"I have my home address in my wallet and a map with places of importance to me marked on it," John said, telling them his address when they looked doubtful.

"That's right next to me," Makoto said with a smile.

"So I can follow you home," John said cheerfully, not noticing the far off look in her eyes as she smiled and nodded.

"I think I recall a medical study about someone who lost their memory every time they went to sleep after receiving a heavy blow to the head," Ami offered.

"I saw a movie called Blank Slate based on something like that," John said, accepting another cookie from Makoto. "It was a funny movie. Doubt it applies to me though, cause I have no current head injuries," John broke off what he was saying to scoop up a black cat that was sniffing him under the table.

The girls' eyes widened as John picked up Luna.

"That's my cat, Luna," Usagi quickly said. "She must have followed me to school."

"I think she's a Mau," John said, freezing everyone including Luna in place.

"Mau?" Ami asked trying to act calm while everyone's hands were instinctively sliding towards their henshin rods.

"She looks a lot like an Egyptian Mau," John explained. "They're generally show cats, bred for beauty."

Everyone relaxed, including Luna who was getting her chin scratched.

"Really?" Usagi asked.

"Well Luna is obviously a superior breed," John said. "The legends say Egyptian Mau were originally advisers to the court of the pharaohs. They wore the mark of Bast's favor upon their brows and could talk among other things, but they offended Bastet and were reduced to nothing more than common animals."

"What did they do?" Usagi asked wide eyed.

"No idea," John said simply. "The legends don't say. My guess is that the age of magic had passed and Bast simply gathered all the Royal Mau to herself leaving the common Mau, who were just cats. Not wanting to admit to admit to their enemies that they lost one of their greatest resources the Pharaohs simply used common Mau and claimed they'd offended Bast when their ruse was discovered."

"So you believe in magic?" Ami asked.

John nodded. "The world runs in cycles and since the sailor senshi are fighting youma I'm guessing they are the heralds of the new age of magic."

"What exactly does that mean?" Usagi asked confused.

"It means magic is beginning to make its return."

"And science is just going to stop working?" Ami asked doubtfully.

John laughed. "Science will work as it always has, but when it comes right down to it people use whatever tool is easiest and since magic works as much by intent as the parameters of the spell, magic eventually pushes science aside and only the people at the highest levels of both, where science and magic meet, use it."

"How do you know all this?" Ami asked intently.

John scratched the back of his head and laughed nervously. "I don't remember."

Ami groaned as the bell rang marking the end of lunch.

"See you after school, Makoto," John said putting his backpack on and picking up Luna without thinking about it, his mind stuck on wondering why he was babbling. Taking his seat in class John realized he was still holding Luna and hoped the teacher wouldn't mind, however she'd been called away and the principle was covering for her.

"Mr. Flint," the principle announced with a smirk that boded ill for John's hope, as he recognized the cat and loved to both pun and embarrass the students. "Unless you have a valid medical reason I'm going to have to ask you to stop stroking Miss Tsukino's pussy while in class."

Usagi turned bright red and sank down in her seat.

Thinking quickly John replied, "I have high blood pressure." Everyone knew petting cats reduced your blood pressure.

"High enough to require you to require to stroke another student's pussy in class?"

Recalling some of the stranger rules of anime, John pulled out a small sewing kit from his backpack and pricked his thumb with a needle, spouting a stream of blood like a garden sprinkler getting an impressive three foot distance.

Wide eyed the principle nodded dumbly. "With blood pressure that high, feel free to stroke Tsukino's pussy whenever you feel like it."

Usagi discovered new shades of red.

"Can I get that in writing?" John asked while bandaging his thumb.

The off duty senshi stared at John in disbelief.

"Sure," the principle nodded dumbly, mechanically writing out a permanent pass.

"Put 'any students'," John suggested. "I don't want to have to rely on bugging Usagi all the time."

John cleaned up the blood and collected his note before returning to his seat and petting Luna, who he could tell was struggling not to laugh. The principle recovered himself as class began and except for the occasional pun proved to be an excellent teacher. As school ended John found himself surrounded by the inners, who fired rapid fire questions at him.

"Hold up!" he ordered. "It's a genetic condition. My blood is always under pressure and I produce a lot of it, so unless I'm left to bleed for a while I'm fine." Anime characters had twenty some-odd gallons of blood under high pressure in a lot of anime, so he'd gambled on the fact that he would too. Saying their goodbyes, Makoto walked John home as she really did live in the apartment next to him.

John entered his apartment calling out, "Hey Lucy, I'm home!"

There was no answer and a quick glance around the place told him he lived alone. It also told him that his movie and book collections had come with him, along with nearly every toy he'd ever owned for some reason, including ones that had been destroyed and an ungodly amount of lego blocks.

Of course what really caught his attention was the fact that his computer with the lighted keyboard and dual twenty two inch flat screen monitors was there. His computer with countless reams of fanfiction and downloaded files of all types on it. His MP3 collection, his collection of funny pictures, and his own fanfiction, most of which was unfinished as he found starting a story easy, but ending it nearly impossible.

Settling in front of his computer, he bumped the mouse and was rewarded with the computer coming to life. Rubbing his hands together and giggling evilly he typed in his password, LoveDeathSexGod.

He was up quite late.

Typing by: The Last Primarch!

AN: SI fics are a guilty pleasure, but as everyone knows an actual SI with me would be boring, so really he's more of an OC with some common traits of mine.