A/N- This is a little one shot I thought of after last weeks episode (Tested). Minor spoilers, but generally you're safe. Please comment and let me know what you think!

-I don't own anything from Glee!


It started with that stupid cleanse. That disgusting, stupid cleanse that Blaine had found. After their fight and Blaine admitting to Kurt that he felt insecure and that he just wanted to be healthy and feel good about himself again, Kurt and Blaine discussed what they could do. Kurt wanted to support Blaine, so he joined a fitness class with him, they began taking walks together around Blaine's neighborhood, and they found plenty of enjoyable ways to burn calories in private.

Everything seemed fine at first, and if Blaine began working out between classes and eating a little bit less at meals, Kurt hadn't thought anything of it. Blaine was still trying to find his place in New York. When Kurt had first moved to the city, he found himself being thrown into working with gorgeous and thin people, and if he had skipped a few meals at the beginning of his time here, well it just happened. Eventually he found a way to balance eating healthy meals and fitting in time to exercise. Going to NYADA classes only helped and provided more movement that helped to transform his body.

Sure Kurt noticed that after Blaine gave up the junk food and eating out every single day, that he seemed to withdraw from food completely, however after a while Kurt found himself getting caught up in his own life at school, the diner, and his internship. Of course he still noticed when Blaine's ribs began to stick out a little more, and his collarbone was suddenly present, however with their schedules becoming hectic with midterms, their time together generally consisted of having other people around. When one of them slept at the other's place, they tended to be too exhausted for sex, so they would just pass out, fully clothed in pajamas.

It was a week into their winter break that Kurt finally saw what Blaine had been doing to his body.


Kurt had just gotten home from a double shift at the diner and was pleased to see that the apartment was empty. Blaine was coming by within the hour, and he couldn't wait to see his boyfriend, it felt like it had been weeks since they had had any alone time together. Kurt quickly made his way into the bathroom and jumped into the shower to wash away the smell of grease and hamburgers.

When he was finished, he wrapped a towel around his waist and made his way across the loft to where his "bedroom" was, only to find Blaine laying across the bed in his workout clothes, sweating and still breathing heavily.

"Hey, how long have you been here?" Kurt smiled at him before digging through his dresser for some lounging clothes to wear.

Blaine didn't even open his eyes, "Just…a few…minutes." He panted, trying to catch his breath.

"Too bad you didn't get here sooner, you could've joined me." He smiled suggestively as he dropped his towel and began to change into the clothes.

Blaine finally opened his eyes, looking up at Kurt and smiled a little before dropping his head again, eyes closed.

"Well don't seem so excited to see your hot fiancé naked."

"Sorry, m'dizzy." He reached up and put his hand on over his face.

Kurt pulled his shirt on and then walked over to the bed, placing his hand on Blaine's arm, his much thinner arm, Kurt noticed.

"Are you ok?"

"Mmhmm."

Kurt rubbed his arm for a moment, taking in Blaine's appearance. When Blaine dropped his hand but kept his eyes closed, Kurt noticed that Blaine's face was much more sunken in than it had been. His cheekbones were prominent and there were dark circles under his eyes. Blaine's jawline, always well defined, was now sharp, and looking down at his body, Kurt realized that Blaine, always thin, now appeared gaunt. Through his shirt that stuck to him with sweat, Kurt could see each rib and he was sure that if he were turned over, he would be able to count even knob of his spine. There was also a distinct thigh gap, and Blaine's running pants did not hide how bony his legs were.

A cold chill ran down Kurt's spine at the same time that his heart dropped and a deep feeling of shame ran over him of 'how did I not notice sooner?'

Kurt ran his hand through Blaine's hair, which he noticed was much more dull than before and seemed to have thinned some; Because he's starving himself, his mind supplied.

"Blaine, did you eat today?"

Kurt could feel him tense slightly, however he opened his eyes and looked at him.

"I uh.." He looked away, "Yea, this morning."

"What did you have?"

"Why?" There was an edge to it, but Blaine blinked and seemed to realize that he had snapped at Kurt, "Um, I mean why does it matter?"

Kurt continued to rub his fingers through his hair comfortingly, "Well you're dizzy, maybe you need to eat."

"Oh, uh, yea." He said dumbly.

"Are you hungry?"

"Not really, no."

Kurt sighed a little, "I've been a horrible boyfriend, never mind fiancé."

"What?" Blaine sat up, but quickly held his head in his hands until the dizzy spell mostly passed and he could look at Kurt, "Why would you say that?"

Kurt took one of Blaine's hands and rubbed his thumb over every bone that stuck out a little too far on the back of his hand and his wrist, "I've just been so busy, that I somehow didn't notice how much you were struggling," He looked into Blaine's eyes, "I didn't see that you were hurting yourself."

Blaine looked confused at that, "What are you talking about?"

"Blaine, have you looked in the mirror lately? Do you see how thin you've become?"

He was taken aback, "I don't know what you're talking about. Kurt, we talked about the fact that I needed to eat better, that I needed to lose weight."

Kurt shook his head, "We agreed that eating healthy was always a good idea, but we never agreed that you needed to lose weight."

Blaine pulled his hand out of Kurt's, "Well, I did. You know I did, I was getting fat and…" He looked away from Kurt, "And I needed to fix that."

Kurt put his hand on Blaine's cheek and directed his face so that they were eye to eye, "Honey, you were never fat…never. You have always been the most handsome man, and I am seriously worried about you right now."

Blaine stood up and began walking away, but quickly had to grab onto the dresser for support when the world tilted violently.

Kurt jumped up and placed his arm around Blaine's waist and led him into the kitchen, depositing him at the table.

Blaine placed his head in his hands, "I'm fine, I promise."

Kurt began looking at what they had, knowing that it had to be light, Blaine's stomach would not handle a heavy meal right now, no matter how much Kurt wanted to get food into him. He found a chicken noodle soup that had a high calorie count and figured that with a piece of toast would have to do.

As he began heating the soup up, he looked back at Blaine who had not moved, "Let's talk about it after we eat, no matter what you are not ok at this second, you are dizzy and it's because you have been pushing yourself too hard and not giving your body the nutrients it needs. We are going to have dinner and then we can come back to this conversation, ok?"

Blaine mumbled out a fine, though Kurt wasn't really asking.

He poured the soup into two bowls and made two slices of toast, making sure to put a little bit of butter on each for the calories and fat, before setting the table.

When Kurt sat across from Blaine he watched as his fiancé stared down at the food.

"What's wrong?"

Blaine looked up quickly then back down at the soup, "I just…I'm really not that hungry."

"Blaine, you're about two seconds from passing out…have some soup."

He sighed, but after a moment's hesitation, Kurt watched as his shaking hand grabbed the spoon and began mixing the it to cool it down. The apartment was silent, and as he ate, Kurt watched Blaine take eat small spoonful's of broth from the corner of his eye. With a small huff, he moved his placement from across from Blaine to next to him.

"You need to have some of the bulk of the soup, you need sustenance." He said quietly.

Blaine dropped the spoon with a clank, and Kurt watched as his breath became labored.

"Blaine?" He asked concerned when he saw a tear fall down Blaine's down-casted face.

"I can't." It was whispered.

"You can't what?" He spoke quietly as well.

Blaine looked up at him, fear and anguish clear in his hazel eyes, "Please don't make me eat this."

Kurt moved his chair closer and Blaine fell into him when he opened his arms. Kurt felt when Blaine's body began to be wracked with sobs.

"It's ok…everything is going to be ok." Kurt spoke gently to him, holding Blaine's head with one hand, rubbing up his bony back with the other, "We'll figure this out."

Blaine cried for a while, but when he eventually calmed and pulled back, Kurt stood up and helped Blaine over to the couch, leaving the dishes behind and out of Blaine's sight.

Blaine curled up into Kurt's arms.

"I'm sorry." He whispered and Kurt almost missed it.

"Why are you sorry?"

"I just…I wanted to be perfect for you. I wanted you to be proud to be seen with me."

"God Blaine, I have always been proud to be seen with you and you have always been perfect for me. I wouldn't care if you were 500 lbs, I will always love you. Though I think if you were 500 lbs you'd probably always have to be on the bottom."

Blaine huffed out a small laugh.

"Everything's been really hard." He confessed after silence had seeped back into the loft.

"I know," Kurt was rubbing through his hair again, "I'm sorry that I didn't notice."

"I should've told you."

He kissed the side of Blaine's head, "I wish you would've, but if I would've looked for five seconds I could've realized so much sooner. I don't ever want you to hurt yourself."

"I don't know how to stop."

"I know, baby, we're going to figure it out together, ok?"

Blaine just buried deeper into Kurt's side.


By the time summer rolled around, things were starting to feel more normal. Blaine was still underweight, still struggled daily to eat and to exercise in moderation, but he was slowly getting back to a healthy weight. Kurt didn't kid himself, Blaine was not better, and they had experienced many set backs throughout the semester when Kurt would be busy and Blaine would be stressed and two or three days would go by without him eating more than a few carrots or celery. Going to therapy was helping, and Kurt tried to make sure that he was with Blaine for most meals, but it was still a work in progress.

It would take three years before Blaine would be in control of his eating and exercising. He would still have some days where it was harder than others, but he finally felt able to eat a more fattening dinner with Kurt on their anniversary, and not feel immediate guilt; not want to go jogging right away to burn every calorie. He finally felt content with how he looked and knew that Kurt felt the same way. The desire to look perfect, to be thin, was always there but with Kurt's support, he knew he would be ok.