A/N: A thousand apologies, dear readers. I had several health issues that required my attention and laid me out for a month - I thought I was dying - but I'm back now and so are the muses. I hope you guys haven't lost interest in this story. One reminder note about this chapter - M&M's son's name is Will, but he thinks of himself as Liam. Strong T label for this chapter for suggestive adult theme and language. And maybe a tissue for angst.

Last time: Mary revealed to Marshall that she knew she'd been a mother all these years. And now, Marshall's reaction. . . .

Marshall jerked out of her hold and scooted away from her. "You what? You knew about Will all this time-"

"Marshall, wait-"

"I need some air."

"No, wait, damn it! I knew I'd had a baby but that's all! Please, don't go. I need you to listen to me."

Marshall was standing in the middle of her bedroom, his back to her, his chest heaving as he tried to get enough air into his lungs. At this moment, he was praying that he was caught in the middle of nightmare. Perhaps he had had the most intense sexual experience of his life last night and fallen asleep only to awaken in this nightmare world. He shut his eyes, hoping to block out the images and words that were crowding his brain but Mary was still speaking.

"Sister Agnes asked me in the hospital when I woke up if I'd had a baby- and I was horrified. I denied it because I didn't remember having a child or you or anything else about my life. When the doctor came in and told me that there was medical proof that I'd recently had a child, I didn't know what to think. Here I was in a strange hospital, barely able to remember my own name, and there was a baby out there somewhere that was mine? It was – I just couldn't wrap my head around it."

"What did you do?" he whispered without turning to face her.

"I recovered and tried not to think about it. As more of my memory returned, I remembered us but as I've told you, I thought we broke up at graduation so I didn't think the baby was yours. I started to have nightmares that I'd had a one night stand with Mark or that some college frat guy had come into the diner just as we were closing and-" her voice trailed off.

Marshall's eyes flew open at the sound of pain in her voice and he turned around to see her curled in a ball on the bed, rocking back and forth. He moved slowly over to sit beside her and she looked up as the bed dipped under his weight. Lifting his good hand to brush some hair back from her face, he urged, "Go on."

She took a deep breath and leaned into his touch. "I know I should have looked for the baby, but I didn't want to know – by the time I got out of the hospital and was recovered enough to where I could physically look after myself, it had been nearly a year since the accident – and I figured he or she would be with the father."

His thumb stroked her cheek. "He was."

She threw herself against his chest with a small sob. "I'm so sorry – I don't know how to make up for all the mistakes I've made over the years."

Marshall drew a long suffering sigh. "God knows I've made enough of my own over the years, Mer. Enough to know that we can't go back and change the past no matter how much we want to." He took another deep breath and wrapped his arms around her waist. "All we can do is go forward from here and try not to repeat our past mistakes."

She reached up and laced her fingers together behind his neck. "Is that what you want, Marshall? To move forward from here with me?"

He leaned his forehead against hers and she could feel his breath against her skin. "I don't know about you, but I'm sick and tired of living my life in neutral."

She pecked his lips lightly. "Is that what you've been doing, String Bean? Living your life in neutral – waiting for me?"

He didn't answer her with words, just stared into her green eyes before giving her a short kiss in response.

"I didn't ask you to do that – wait for me, live your life like a damn Monk while I was out at the bars, whoring it up-"

He snatched her by the upper arms and shook her hard, twice. "Don't you ever say that again, Mary Shannon Mann! Do you hear me? I don't ever want to hear those words cross your lips in reference to yourself again, understand?"

She nodded and felt his body relax as their foreheads touched again. "But I have to know if this is something you can move past, Marshall. It did happen- I did sleep with other-"

"I know, but do we have to talk about it?"

She freed one of her hands from around his neck and picked up his wrapped hand, holding it up between them. "I think we do." She kissed the wrapping lovingly before setting his hand back on her hip. "I have to know what bothers you about it – the fact that I slept with other men, that they were one night stands, that other men got to touch me-"

"Stop, please." He tried to move out of her embrace, but she tightened her hold and swung her leg over his lap, straddling him on the bed. "I can't talk – I can't focus with you on top of me like this, Mer."

"Try – I promise to sit still and be very good."

He looked at her in disbelief but she said nothing more and waited for him to speak. "I – all of it bothers me. I don't like to think of anyone touching you other than me – let alone loving you-"

She leaned in and pressed a brief kiss to his lips. "First of all, they were one night stands – it was just fucking, Marshall."

He shook his head. "That doesn't help. It doesn't make me feel better – don't you see? They still touched you –"

She lifted his hands and placed them on her chest, right over her beating heart. "Do you feel that – how fast my heart is racing?" She waited for his nod. "You are the only one who has ever made my heart accelerate – and that happens with a single look, never mind what happens with a touch."

Keeping his injured hand on her chest, he lifted the other and trailed it down her cheek, ending at her mouth. He watched as she shuddered under his touch and smiled as he felt her heartbeat accelerate under his hand.

"None of them loved me, String Bean – and I sure as hell didn't love any of them."

He frowned. "What about Raph?"

She flinched and tried to withdraw but he held her fast. "I – he said he loved me – but you tell me, Marshall. Do you hurt the person you love during sex? When she tells you 'no' do you ignore her and keep going, thinking only of your own needs? That's not the way it was between us – that's not the way you loved me."

Marshall tamped down the rage building in his gut as his hands ran up her torso, shaking all the way. When they reached her face, he gently traced the lines of her cheekbones and she sighed into his touch. "That's not the way it's supposed to be between two people who love each other – and no always means no. If you ever say no to me, I want you to know I'd-" he swallowed hard as the emotions overwhelmed him and his throat went dry.

She placed her hands over his. "I know. But I also know I'd never have to tell you no." Her lips brushed his softly. "I never loved him, Marshall – not the way I love you. Please believe me. You're the only one who's seen me at my best and my worst and never gave up on me. You waited eighteen years for me. You showed me what love really is – and being without you all these years showed me what it isn't. You're the only man I want, the only man I need. Please tell me you still want this – that you can move past this and go forward from here with me."

Marshall's eyes had darkened to a midnight blue and were sparkling in his face as he pulled her closer to him and she moaned in response. "Since the day I met you in that diner, Mary, my life has never been complete without you. I've been living half a life since the day you left – and if I have to walk away from you now, I think I'll die."

"Then don't."

His lips covered hers and she lost her train of thought as his hands caressed her neck and shoulders, finally landing in her hair. She moaned and pulled him into her, forgetting her promise to be good, smiling as she felt his erection against her thigh.

He moaned and pulled her with him as they laid back on the bed. "How about we focus on us right now? And never mentioning Raph's name again?"

She laughed into his neck. "Deal. But - Marshall?"

"Hmm?" he hummed lazily as he stroked the skin under her shirt.

"I need you to know something before we never talk about you-know-who or the other men again-"

"Mary-"

She sat up. "No, listen. None of them, including what's his name – I always practiced safe sex, so I'm clean. You're the only man I've ever trusted to come inside me – the only man I've ever let touch me that deep inside-"

Marshall surged to a sitting position and claimed her mouth in a searing possession that made the butterflies inside Mary explode into a thousand stars. He found her left hand and held it fast, their rings clinking together as he again lowered her to the bed as the storm raged outside.

Three Weeks Later

"I can't believe Mom isn't taking any of this with her."

Marshall looked up from his lap top to grin at Will. "I told you – this is a fully furnished unit – all of the furniture stays here."

"Including the beds? That's kinda gross, Dad – just think of all the germs that have collected over the years from all the past tenants-"

"You've slept on the pull out for the past three weeks, Son. Do you really want to finish that thought?"

Liam paled. "I think I need a shower."

Marshall grinned. "Don't worry – I'm sure the owner deep cleans the mattresses between renters."

Liam cocked his head to the side. "How sure?"

"Uh – where's your mother?"

"She's sitting on the log out on the beach – do you think she's having second thoughts about coming with us?"

Marshall shut down his lap top and turned to face his son. Will's arm was no longer in a sling and he had fully recovered from the shooting, at least physically. Marshall knew his son still had nightmares a couple times a week and he was concerned about the dark circles under his son's eyes that testified to a lack of sleep. Will insisted he was fine but frankly Marshall was eager to get his family home and try to reestablish a sense of normalcy.

"I think she just wanted a little time for herself before we left for the airport. She hasn't been sleeping well-"

"Whoa- TMI, Dad."

Marshall shook his head. "Not because of –" he waved his hand, not finishing the sentence that would only embarrass both of them. "She's been having dreams about the day she left us."

"She's remembering?"

"A bit – but not fast enough to satisfy her. Your mother is not a patient woman, Will. Now that she remembers us – she wants all of the missing pieces to be filled in. Your grandfather's letter gave her some answers and helped her remember but now the rest is up to her. And she's not being patient with herself."

"How can I help?"

Marshall settled a hand on his son's shoulder. "Just by being there. Let her know you love her – have you told her that since you woke up?"

"I – well-"

Marshall nodded and removed his hand. "I know, those are three of the hardest words in the English language. I waited eighteen years for your mother to say them to me."

Liam's mouth fell open. "She told you she loved you?"

Marshall nodded.

"What did you say?"

He leveled a look of disbelief on his son "What do you think I said?"

Liam grinned. "So tell me, Dad – was it just like the movies? Did you fall into each other's arms and-"

Marshall reached out and slugged his son on his uninjured shoulder. "Get out of here. Go tell your mom we have to leave for the airport in twenty minutes."

"Dad, can I ask you something?"

"You can ask me anything, you know that."

"Well, you said mom just now told you she loved you – but my question is, did you know she loved you before she said the words?"

Marshall's lips quirked as he tried not to grin. "Yes."

"How?"

"Because I knew her, Will. Your mother always said more with her eyes and her actions than her words-" Marshall grinned. "Actually, her words were her best weapon. She used them to keep everyone out of her heart – and it worked until I came along."

"But – how did you get through?"

He shrugged. "You'll have to ask her."

"You don't know?"

Marshall blew out a breath. "Will, there are some stories – some parts of our past that I haven't shared with you – not because I don't think you'd understand or you're not old enough but because they are private and personal and between a man and wife. One day you will understand this – and really, do you tell me everything about your relationship with Julia?"

Liam flushed to the roots of his hair. "Well – no."

Marshall rested his hands on his son's shoulders. "Nor should you. Some things are meant to be between a man and his –"

"Dad! Jules is just my girlfriend."

Marshall gave him a long, silent look before nodding slowly. "Of course." He cleared his throat and dropped his hands. "But you do understand – at least a little?"

"Yeah, Dad, I get it. Just – I don't want to see you get hurt again-"

Marshall turned back to his son, understanding flooding his eyes. "Oh, Will." He breathed his son's name out on an exhale of breath. "Is that what's been churning around in your brain and keeping you up nights?"

Liam thrust a hand through his hair and shuffled his feet, dropping his gaze to the floor. Marshall closed the distance between them and crushed his son to him in a bear hug.

"I love you so much, William, and I need you to hear me, all right?" He pulled back so he could look his son in the eyes, Mary's eyes. "I know that for all your life it has just been you and me and we've looked after each other-"

"Yeah, well, with your job someone's needed to look after you. You don't exactly sit at the courthouse and drink coffee all day, Dad."

Marshall chuckled. "Only when I'm on transports."

"Really?"

He shook his head. "No, but I'm getting off track. I made the decision not to go after your mother when you were a little boy to protect you and that's a decision I'll regret for the rest of my life because you could have had a mother all these years-"

Liam wrenched himself out of his father's grip. "You knew – all this time?"

"Yes."

"How long?"

"Since you were six."

Liam's face went pale and for a moment Marshall was afraid his son might faint. He reached out but his son backed up. "How could you?"

"Will-"

"No. I don't want to hear it. I don't think there's anything you could say that could- Fuck, Dad!"

"William! Don't talk to your father like that!"

Both men whirled to see Mary standing in the front hallway, her eyes blazing green fire. "Mary, don't-" Marshall warned.

She ignored him as she came closer to square off with her son. Ever since she had gotten her cast off three days ago, she was back to moving quickly and quietly and neither one of them had heard her coming.

"You apologize to your father right now."

"I will not."

Mary reeled back in surprise. "What's going on here?"

Liam laughed hollowly. "Did you know, Mom?"

Mary shrugged "Know what?"

"That Dad has known since I was SIX where you were? How does that make you feel? That he kept us apart all this time?"

"Stop it!" Mary ordered and Liam looked at her in surprise. "Yes, I knew – he told me."

"And you're OK with it? That you had a kid and he never bothered to tell you about it? Mom-"

"I'm OK with it because I already knew I had one."

Liam fell back a few paces in shock and she heard Marshall groan behind her. "You – you knew about me?"

"Will, wait-" Mary touched his forearm.

"NO!" he shrugged off her touch. "Get the fuck away from me! Both of you-" Liam shook his head, his eyes full of unshed tears. "I can't believe this. We've been living under the same roof for the past few weeks playing happy family and it was all a lie."

"It was not a lie, Will," Marshall broke in softly. "We are a family – we're your parents and we love you."

Liam snorted. "Lying to me – to each other – that's love?"

Mary stepped towards him. "Please listen-"

"I don't want to hear a word you have to say, Mary," Liam ground her name out between clenched teeth. "Dad was right not to come and find you all those years ago – was your amnesia a lie too?"

"William Marshall Mann!" Marshall thundered. "You will apologize to your mother right now for speaking to her in such a way."

Liam's answer was the slamming of the front door and Marshall raked a hand through his hair in frustration as he turned to his wife. "What the hell were you thinking – telling him that you knew about his existence? You must have known how he would react!"

Mary's eyes were shiny with unshed tears as she cleared her throat. "I was thinking that I couldn't let you take all the blame – and he might as well know the whole truth now."

"Well, that's just great, isn't it? Now he's furious with both us and probably will miss the plane as a result. Fuck, Mary."

"There are other flights, Marshall. We'll just wait him out – you're good at waiting. Remember how long you waited for me?"

He glared at her. "Now is not the time to throw that in my face."

She captured his hands in hers and squeezed. "All right then, how about this? You're always telling me that Will is a combination of both of us, right?"

He nodded.

"Well, we just saw my side – the language and temper – sorry about that, String Bean. Why couldn't he have inherited something else from me?"

Marshall raised a hand to cup her cheek. "In case you haven't noticed, he also has your passion for life."

"Oh, well, that's something I guess. Now, where was I?"

"You were going to say something about what Will's inherited from me."

"Yes!" Mary lifted her hands and cupped his face. "He has lots of your good qualities – but the one that I'm counting on right now is your good common sense. He's not going to do anything stupid. He didn't take the car keys – so I'm sure he's just out there pacing the beach, swearing and blowing off steam-"

"Like you would be-"

"Yes, but unlike me he will be back in time for us to leave for the airport."

He leaned in and kissed her, soft and slow. "I love you – no matter what happens, remember that."

She frowned. "What does that mean?"

Before he could reply, the front door flew open and banged against the wall. Liam stood in the doorway and stared at his parents for a long moment before grabbing his duffel bag off the floor.

"I'll be in the car," he announced as he slammed the door behind him.

Mary raised her eyebrows as she looked back at Marshall. "See? I told you he'd be back."

"Only because he wants to get home to Julia and away from the two of us."

"No, I'm sure you're-"

"Mary, how long can you hold a grudge?" Marshall interrupted her as he moved to pick up two of her suitcases.

She paled. "Is that something else he inherited from me?"

"You got it, Sunshine."

We're screwed.

A/N: Whoa - is there a happy ending for the Mann family? I'm seeing some therapy in their future - what do you think? Reviews are LOVE!