This was written for VAMB Secret Drabble 2014. My request was for a friendship story, any pairing, with the first line, "I fold." I gifted one part of this to splv, but it just wouldn't leave me alone. So I kept writing. This is the result. Enjoy. (Oh, and I'll try to wrap up "Joyride" this weekend, too, for those of you who've asked.)

Secret Drabble 2014

"Origami"

Step One:

Bring the lower left corner of the square to the upper right corner and crease to form a new shape: a triangle.

I fold the last of the newly replicated clothes and stuff them in a drawer and slam the drawer shut so hard the bulkhead shudders.

This is wrong, all of this is wrong and stupid and it's all I can do to keep myself from screaming and running to the shuttlebay and stealing a ship and taking as many of us with me as I can and getting the hell out of here.

You're the only thing that's keeping me from it.

I can see you in the mirror above the little sink. You're standing there calm and in control as if this isn't happening the way I think it is or isn't even happening at all.

"It's the right thing to do, Torres," you say and I snarl and whirl around.

"For you, maybe, Chakotay, but it's not the right thing for me or any of the rest of us."

"What makes you think that?"

"Look at me!" I shout. "Tell me you really think I can survive on a Starfleet ship."

"I think you can. In fact, I think you'll do well here."

"And where is 'here,' anyway? The middle of nowhere, that's where it is, and we are stuck here with…with these people who look at us like we're diseased or something."

"No, they don't." Your soft voice makes me even madder because deep down I know you're right. "They're in the same situation we are, having the same doubts."

"Doubts?" I laugh and it comes out as a humorless bark. "They're good little Starfleet officers. They're not allowed to have doubts."

"Of course they do. They're scared and unsure, just like we are."

"They didn't even question her!"

"They won't. Not openly."

"Not the way I did, you mean."

"No."

We stare at each other in the empty and quiet room and it hits me that you are taking this better than any of the rest of us and my hands clench into fists. "You want to stay, don't you?"

"I don't think we have any choice." I'm so angry I don't even care that you didn't answer the question.

"Not since you blew up my damn ship, we don't."

"My ship, B'Elanna." There's a warning rumble in your voice, the same one I heard on the Bridge a few hours ago. "My ship, my decision. My decision here, too."

I slam my hand on the bulkhead and you don't even flinch. "So we stay."

"We stay."

"What about the Maquis?" I counter. "What about the Cardies and the abandoned colonies? What about your father, Chakotay? And your sister?"

Your shoulders droop a little. "I know. It's not going to be easy to let all of that go, but we have to if this is going to work. We have to give up that fight, at least while we're here."

"And what are we supposed to do here, Chakotay? Hang around our quarters for the next seventy years?"

"Of course not. I had trained Starfleet personnel and talented people in my crew, and she lost people, too. She's going to review your records, and then we're going to work together to find places for you. We think-"

I lunge at you. "'We think?' Are you already working for her?"

You roll your shoulders and duck your head and I know, I just know, what you're going to say. "She offered me a position and I accepted. First Officer."

You expect me to be furious and I am but you're the one who taught me how mask that fury when it was necessary to survive. So I breathe in – one, two, three, four – hold for seven, exhale for eight. I wonder if you even notice it. "First Officer. Congratulations, Chakotay."

You give me a tight smile. "Under the circumstances I don't think congratulations are exactly appropriate. But thank you anyway."

I turn away and rap my knuckles on top of the dresser while I breathe in and out again. "Do you trust her?"

You don't even hesitate, you just blurt it out like it's a relief to say it. "Yes. I trust her."

I angle my head enough that I can see you in the little mirror again because I think that if I looked you in the eye right now you'd duck my next question with a twisted joke or another evasion or a really bad story. "Why?"

"Destroying the Array was the right thing to do." The words sound rehearsed but the tone of your voice tells me that you're working it out for yourself right now, right here in these quarters, after you've already accepted the job. "The right thing, but not the easy thing. That…surprised me. She could have gotten us back to the Alpha Quadrant, but only at the expense of the Ocampa. She wasn't willing to sacrifice their lives."

I stop breathing so carefully and whirl on you. "She sacrificed ours instead!"

"And that's what it means to be a starship Captain." In your voice there's a note of admiration I have never heard from you before. "She sacrificed our futures, and hers, for the greater good. She stuck to the principles we were taught."

"Would you have done the same thing?"

"Yes. In a Vulcan heartbeat."

"She'd have turned us over to the Federation for those principles."

"Yes."

"She still could, if we get back."

"Maybe. We'll just have to convince her not to." You give me a sly grin and I can't help but smile. "Seventy years should be enough."

I shake my head at you. "Seska's not going to like it."

You shrug. "I've been trying to stop seeing Seska for months, but it was hard to get away from her on my ship."

I gesture around the room, taking in the corridors, the decks, the upper and lower hulls. "Got plenty of room now. And a perfect excuse."

You nod. "I'm going to break it off and make it stick."

"Good."

You cock an eyebrow at me. "Why?"

I shrug. "She's wrong for you, Chakotay. You have lousy taste in women, but she's the worst."

You give a dark chuckle. "You'll get no argument from me there."

Again we gaze at each other in the silent little room. "First Officer, huh?" You nod. "What about me?"

"I'm sure we can find a place for you in Engineering." I nod and stare at my feet. "It's better here," you say softly. "You can see that, can't you? When was the last time any of us had a room like this, or a comfortable bed to sleep in, or hot meals three times a day? When was the last time we could stop watching our backs and relax because there were enough of us to protect each other? When was the last time you felt this safe?"

I look up. "You feel safe?"

You nod. "Safer than I have in the last couple of years. Don't you?"

I turn and sit down on the edge of the bed. I think about the years of fighting and running and hiding in the Maquis and before. "I guess I do."

"I won't tell you it's going to be easy. Nothing worth doing ever is." You sit down next to me. "But it's going to be okay, B'Elanna. We could have good lives here. We will. I'll make sure of it."

"I know you will."

You rub your chin with your fingertips. "There's just one thing."

I narrow my eyes. "What?"

"We're going to have to wear these." You separate the pile of red and yellow and black fabric you brought with you and hand part of it to me.

Together in the silence of my new quarters, we unfold our Starfleet uniforms.

###