Pairings: SasuNaru, Slight NaruDei, HidaDei... and I have no idea who else at this point? Have any ideas? I'd love to hear em'!

Author's note: First off… HELLOOOOOOO! Nice to meet you! My first fan fiction on here! I've been wanting to post fan fiction on here for a long, long time! Just letting you know that this isn't my first ever fan fiction, last year I wrote a ton of them (not Naruto though) but along with this one I'm working on another 3 or 4 SasuNaru ones that I hope to put out soon!

Secondly! I'm a total novice at lemons, romantic cute scenes, suspense, fluff, not fluff and all that... GOSH, I'M A NOIVCE ON EVERYTHING! waaaahhhhh! But I'll give it my all anyways! BELIEVE IT! So bare with me if there are spelling errors or some things don't make sense, just point them out and i'll fix it as soon and as best I can! Thank you.. now please proceed!

Disclaimer: JUST GIMMIE THE DAMN BACON! No wait… It's Naruto I want, not bacon… But bacon sure does sound good right now… Naruto covered in bacon…

*drools over keyboard*

Too bad I only own one of those things… -looks in fridge-

WHERE THE HELL DID MY BACON GO!?

-chuckles nervously- sorry for rambling... now... THE STORY! OMG! :O

"Hmm…" A seventeen year old Naruto Uzumaki slightly squirms in his seat under the watchful and judging gaze of his hopefully future boss Itachi Uchiha.

The name Uchiha is a well-known name across the country. The dominant brother duo are known for being powerful, rich, handsome and most of all for owning the extremely popular one of a kind café, Akatsuki.

It reels in visitors from around the country; and sometimes even the world; coming to this unique cafe. What makes it so unique from the rest? This cafe is open 5 days a week and unless a certain special event is held on a weekend. It is known for not only its divine food, unrivaled hospitality and friendly staff but for the so called 'events' that are held there every so often.

The list of events goes from 'wearing your pajamas's to work' day to 'animal dress up' day. While the rules of a particular event must apply to the waiters and waitresses in the cafe, the customers are very welcome (and very often do) follow along in that particular day's events either it be wearing your pajamas or an overly-flashy suit and tie. This is why Akatsuki and the name Uchiha are known across a vast landscape.

Which brings us back to a still nervous blonde haired, blue eyed teen that is currently undergoing a job interview for Akatsuki by the powerful yet clam elder Uchiha himself who continues to stare up and down at the slim, yet muscular tan figure before him. The pale Uchiha leans back in his black leather chair which sits behind a large dark mahogany desk; a beautiful view of the brightly lit city is seen through the large window casting an eerie light throughout the office.

The elder Uchiha allows his eyes to fall shut before he quietly sighs "You're hired. You start tomorrow at nine sharp. Now get out of my office." He somewhat demands in a monotone voice with his pale eyelids still lightly shut.

The blonde is overwhelmed with utter happiness and delight. The blonde has wanted this job for months now and to get a job at this particular cafe is said to be practically impossible but he did it! He showed those no good losers whose boss! The eager blonde started jumping and dancing around the room, wiggling his hips and failing his arms in the air like he just doesn't care; for at least a good two and a half minutes before finally locking eyes with the now glaring and obviously annoyed Uchiha.

"I said Leave… Now." He persisted before the young blonde jumped and slightly blushed from embarrassment

"Oh right! Sorry." he chuckled slightly before exciting the room and contining his so called 'dancing'.

~ The Next Day~

On an oddly bright and sunny Saturday morning, Naruto finally enters the widely known cafe as a full-fledged staff member. The blonde teen is currently wearing the normal uniform which consists of a white dress shirt, black slacks; for the girls it's a short black skirt; and a black surprisingly sophisticated apron that is tied around their waists and falls over the lower half of their bodies stopping just before their knees. Naruto was instantly greeted by a tall man with a black mask covering the bottom portion of his face while his silver fringe covers one if his eyes, the rest of his hair up high but lazily slopped to one side, the tall man is wearing the normal uniform but without the black apron.

"Ah, Naruto-kun! It's nice to finally meet you; Itachi has told me all about you." His small smile his visible through the crease marks in his mask.

"He has? Oh, That's cool… Uh, who are you again?" The blonde laughed sheepishly while rubbing the back of his neck slightly embarrassed.

"We haven't met before. My name is Kakashi Hatake. I'm well… what you'd call the game maker in this little scenario." Kakashi gave a somewhat evil smirk to no one in particular as endless ideas poured into his complex mind about how he can make working here a little more interesting for the newbie.

"Uhh, Game maker? Scenario? This is Akatsuki right?" Naruto asked, now extremely confused at what position this guy has in the cafe or if he was even in the right cafe.

"Don't listen to Kakashi, he's just trying to play his mind games with you." A messy looking teen harshly smacked Kakashi on the back causing the tall man to hunch over and cough.

The new intruder was tan and lean with messy brown hair and two bright red triangle-like marks, one on either cheek. "He's the man who comes up with the ideas for all the events held here but I'm sure you know all about that." The scruffy hair teen spoke loudly. He smiled showing off a set of canine-like teeth.

This guy? This creepy old guy? He's the so called genius that makes the events that makes this place so popular? No one ever would have guessed. The blonde couldn't help but think to himself. He looked back up when the teen started talking again.

"The name's Kiba, good to meet ya!" He smiled brightly and put out a hand to Naruto who graciously accepted only to have Kiba shake it furiously.

"Naruto Uzumaki, nice to meet you too!" The tanned teen couldn't help but start to feel more confident and returned the handshake with just as much enthusiasm. It was in his nature to be bright, loud and overall confident but who wouldn't be a little nervous about getting the job of a lifetime?

"Let's go to the kitchen I'll introduce you to everyone. I'd tell you who to watch out for and alert you on stuff you shouldn't say in front who... but that wouldn't be any fun now would it?" he smiled cheekily, but Naruto could tell wasn't a real smile, no, it was more of a mischievous smirk, almost like he was waiting for something bad to happen to the blonde teen. Kiba burst through a white door two way door(1) with a small rectangle window in it.

"Everyone, I want you to meet Naruto! He's the- hey wait! Sasuke, where the hell is everybody!?" Kiba yelled into a clean, white and silver and not to mention empty kitchen except for one pale, thin, raven haired teen who was leaning over one of the silver counters that was attached to a white wall.

The pale boy was wearing the standard uniform, he appeared to be reading a dark green book of some sort, Naruto couldn't read what the title said from where he was standing.

"Hn. Not doing their jobs." he replied in an uninterested tone of voice and didn't even bother to look up from his book.

"Oh come on! I brought in a new guy and everything!" Kiba yelled before huffing and crossing his arms over his chest and pouting, obviously annoyed that his big announcement got interrupted.

It wasn't exactly everyday Akatsuki got a new member in its ranks considering how hard it was to get a job there in the first place, let alone a spot even opening up for a position there at all. The raven haired teen, now known to Naruto as Sasuke, finally looked up from his book and stared at the new comer, well more preciously he glared at him and Naruto slightly shuddered under the intense gaze of the younger Uchiha before returning the unwelcomed glare and it dawned on him who this must be.

"Pfft, I can already tell who this guy is." Naruto scoffed and looked away from the now slightly interested raven.

"And who would that be?" Sasuke smirked this... dobe. Who was surprisingly already slightly amusing him, if the way he addressed him had anything to say about it.

"You must be Itachi's younger brother. I can tell by the eyes and the way you both glare at people like your better than them." he huffed still looking away from the now slightly more amused teen, only showing it through a slight smirk placed across his mouth and one perfect eyebrow raised.

"Whoa, you've already met Itachi-san? I had to work here for a year and a half before I even caught a glimpse of the guy." Kiba said, a little jealous but also curious at the same time.

"Of course I met him, he's the one who interviewed and hired me. Didn't he hire you guys as well?"

"Well yeah, but as far as I know me and everyone else here were interviewed by Kakashi and he just got Itachi-san's permission later on. If Kakashi decided he wanted to hire us, of course. None of us have actually formally met or talked to him before, we only see him when he comes on routine visits and stuff." Kiba explained.

"Oh, well I guess he just had spare time or something that he was able to interview me." Naruto chuckled awkwardly rubbing the back of his head. He looked over to the raven who was now merely staring at him, Sasuke made a mental note to ask to his brother about the dobe later.

"Uh, why are you staring at me?" Naruto interrupted Sasuke's mental note

"Hn." Was all that was said before Sasuke just turned back to his book and kept reading as if they never come in the first place.

Naruto frowned and was about to give Sasuke a piece of his mind when Kiba interrupted "Well I better go let everyone else know that we have a new guy, come on Naruto... And Sasuke would you stop reading that stupid porn in public!?" He yelled at Sasuke after starting to drag Naruto across the kitchen towards the back door

"You know Kakashi won't stop bugging me if I don't read it, so shut up and mind your own business." He spoke in a hard tone, once again not even bothering to look up from his book with an uninterested look on his face.

"Arrogant bastard." Naruto mumbled to himself

"Tell me about it." Kiba replied, smiling to himself after hearing the blondes opinion and glad that he just gained a new ally, friend and co-worker.

Yeah, he defiantly liked this new guy.

He and Kiba were half way across the kitchen when the back door swung open and a crowd of laughter could be heard seeping through. "-And when I woke up this morning the asshole was gone again, yeah! God he's such a fucking- Kiba, whose that?" Deidara looked like he was about to go on a very long, very angry rant but stopped immediately at seeing an unfamiliar face in the kitchen.

Everyone followed Deidara's gaze to a tan, blonde, blue eyed teen. "Guys this is Naruto! Itachi hired him and he's working here from now on!" Kiba explained not too lightly smacking Naruto's back.

"Hey, nice to meet you all!" he smiled sheepishly at them; there was a large group of them now standing in front of him and Kiba.

"Oh! Well nice to meet you Naruto, my name is Sakura!" A girl with short pink hair and bright teal eyes welcomed him with a cheery voice.

"This here is Deidara and this is my best friend, Ino." She pointed toward a man or was it a woman? With long blonde hair with half tied up in a high pony tail and a fringe covering one of his eyes before pointing to the other side of her and introduced a girl with extremely long pale blonde hair tied in a ponytail that reached down to the small of her back and light pale blue eyes.

"I'm H-Hinata, nice to meet you N-Naruto-kun." whispered a shy pale girl with pale lavender eyes and long dark hair that had a hint of purple through it.

"Neji Hyuga, pleased to meet you." A pale teen who looked very similar to Hinata with lavender eyes and long hair but his was a dark drown and tied in a low, loose ponytail. 'They must be related' Naruto thought. Neji held out a firm hand and Naruto eagerly shook it.

"Hello newbie, you may call me Sai." Said an almost white skinned teen with short pitch black hair and black eyes to match.

"Gaara." spoke a fiery red-head with pale teal eyes which were surrounded by thick black eye liner and a red marking on his forehead that Naruto recognised as the kanji for love.

"Well now that introductions are over we can finally-" Kiba tried but once again the poor dog-lover was rudely interrupted,

"And I'm Hidan mother fuckers! Wait, why the fuck are we introducing ourselves again?" An overly happy platinum haired man who was well built and had deep purple eyes burst through the main kitchen door causing everyone in the newly introduced group to face palm, all except Deidara whose eye starting twitching and had both fists clenched at his sides, clearly extremely pissed at the newly arrived Hidan.

"Hidan you're an asshole, yeah!" Deidara yelled angrily.

Kiba, who had just finished face palming and Naruto, who was still a little startled by the outburst let alone the unnecessary swearing; turned around to face the intruder.

Deidara starting hastily marching up to Hidan but stopped next to the new blonde member, Deidara stared at Naruto, than Hidan, then Naruto again before he grew an evil smirk across his face. Kiba saw this and instantly started to panic.

"No! Deidara don't! That isn't a good idea right now, not now, not unless you want to get the new guy ki-" but Kiba was too late.

Deidara gave one last glance to Hidan before cupping Naruto's face with his own tanned hand and leaning in, smashing their lips together. Deidara leaned into the kiss melding his and Naruto's lips together forcefully. Naruto just stood there in shock unable to kiss back or pull away but just turned into a complete statue, all he could do was move his eyes which he directed toward the now fuming Hidan who still stood at the main kitchen door.

After a few more seconds of forceful kissing -on Deidara's part- the long haired blonde slowly pulled away from Naruto that was now a statue and still held a cunning smirk across his face. He looked over at Hidan and scoffed crossing his arms and looking away. Hidan instantly marched across the room towards the shorter-haired blonde and picked him up by his collar "You fucking trying to hit on my boyfriend? Huh? I swear you try that shit again and I'll fucking cut your balls off." he angrily whispered into the blondes ear causing Naruto to snap out of his statue-like trance.

"Wait- wha- no! I wasn't trying to hit on your boyfriend!"

"Hidan's not my boyfriend, yeah."

"Shut the fuck up Deidara. Listen here you little punk don't fucking touch what isn't yours. Got it?" Hidan growled, possessiveness flashing through his purple eyes

"I wasn't trying to touch him!? I'd never touch him! He came onto me for god's sake! I don't even understand what's going on right now!?" Naruto looked around with panic etched all over his face.

"What, so he's not fucking good enough for you to touch, is that it?"

"I didn't say that! I think he's definitely good enough for me to touch him!" Naruto said trying anything to please or at least clam the raging beast down.

"So you are trying to fuck my boyfriend! I swear I'll rip your-"

"Hidan, you are not my fucking boyfriend, yeah!"

"DEIDARA! SHUT. THE. FUCK. UP! This little home wrecker was trying to fuck you up the ass! What the fuck do you expect me to do!? Just sit around and watch!?" He screamed turning his head toward the just as angry Deidara beside him.

"As flattered as I am that you made me top, I did not try to have sex with him! Especially in the ass! I'm not trying to fuck anybody! HE ISN'T EVEN MY TYPE!" Naruto screeched in a womanly nature hoping to finally get out of Hidan's tight grip, which suddenly loosened; letting him down onto his feet. He didn't even realise his slip up on his sexuality.

"Isn't your type... you're fucking gay?" Hidan said rather calmly, then instantly started to burst out laughing. By this point the much shorter Naruto is flushed with complete embarrassment at the whole situation.

"Ha! That's a good one. You're alright kid, welcome to the fucking team, you little runt!" He bellowed happily giving the blonde a tough slap on the back and spreading his arms as if to hug the blonde. Hidan's happy face quickly fell and he bent down to meet his lips were right next to Naruto's ear.

"But seriously If I ever see you fucking around with my boyfriend again, I'll tear off your tiny penis and feed it to my fucking pitbull, Richard. You got it?" Hidan whispered in an aggressive tone and Naruto audibly gulped.

"Yes sir!" Couldn't help but straighten up and throw his hand to hit forehead and solute the taller man.

Hidan chuckled and quickly turned to Deidara and just as quickly he threw Deidara over his shoulder and all too soon Deidara started kicking and screaming trying to get out of his hold,

"Come on blondie, Kakashi! Me and Deidara are going to have hot gay sex in the bathroom!" he yelled to Kakashi who was on the other side of the restaurant as if it were a dinner time conversation starter, a light "Have fun" could be heard from the opposite end of the restaurant causing Naruto to blush deeper shade of red.

"Don't worry too much about them, that's just how they work." Kiba gave him a reassuring smile and rested his hand on Naruto's shoulder. Before quickly givng Naruto a once-over with his dark brown eyes.

"And I honestly didn't peg you as a gay." he smiled brightly showing his set of dog like teeth.

"I'm Bi, not gay" Naruto mumbled and gave Kiba a dirty look before walking off and out the kitchen.

いないような悪いやつ結局
(Not such a bad guy after all)

"Okay everyone let us discuss the events that are soon to be held, now Naruto I am assuming you are aware of the certain events that are held here at Akatsuki." Naruto nodded in response. Neji was standing in front of the group in some sort of conference room, it was small so some people had to sit on the floor while only a few got chairs but it was where the members always discussed new ideas for events as well as arranging outfits, budget costs, deadlines and decorations for the restaurant which usually came with some of the more 'extravagant' events held at Akatsuki. Kakashi tells all his rough ideas and thoughts to Neji who sorts them out and runs them past the group, not that they really have a choice in the matter. It's more of a 'I don't care if you don't like, it we're doing it and this is how' kind of meeting.

"So Kakashi has spoken to me about another one of his so called brilliant ideas he has had on a new event. He wants the event arranged by this coming Monday; which gives us exactly two days, including today to plan and prepare." Neji stopped talking and had a slight look of fear and uncertainty flash through his eyes.

"So what's the event?" Kiba asked hastily "Were not getting any younger you know." He persisted seeing the hesitant look in the Hyuga's lavender eyes. What was so bad that even Neji was afraid to say it?

"Most of you aren't going to like this one, but according to Kakashi to help Akatsuki raise a bit more money this month, he wants all the male Akatsuki members to participate in..." He hesitated and sighed

"No shirt day; a new permanent event; all the male members must participate in a contest of who can gain the most tips from customers. Naruto, Just in case you didn't know, a permanent event is one that goes on a record sheet and we are allowed to re-hold that event as many times as we like. Most events are one-time events and we avoid re-using those at all costs to keep it fresh and new which is why we need Kakashi to constantly come up with new ideas." After explaining Neji lowered in head in what seemed like disappointment but just as quickly raised it to inform the rest of the news, like ripping off a band aid in one quick painful swipe.

"Also, whoever receives the most tips from no shirt day gets a voucher worth a weeks' worth of free food at any local chain restaurant or café of their choice." Neji finished before breathing a heavy sigh, this was going to be a long meeting.

"No shirt day!? You've got to be kidding me! We've agreed to some pretty embarrassing stuff but this?" Kiba protested "They can't make us do that! I don't think it's normal to have your body all exposed like that." He shuddered at the thought.

"I agree. What if someone has insecurity with their body? They will not be comfortable and thus unable to participate." Gaara stated firmly with arms cross and an emotionless expression held strong on his face.

"How typical for Kakashi to think of something he knows we won't agree to. That's probably why the free food offer was added into it." Kiba added.

"And what about us girls? I'm feeling a little left out here you know." Ino muttered

"The waitresses will; for obvious reasons; be kept in regular uniform and cannot participate in the tips due to even more obvious reasons." Neji stated to Ino, Sakura and Hinata.

"What obvious reasons?" Naruto asked curiously

"Sakura and Ino will be heavily biost and will constantly tip Sasuke." Neji answered honestly.

"They'd probably drown him in money, pfft, like he doesn't have enough already." Kiba muttered quietly

"And what about little womanly Deidara-chan over here? Does she go shirtless too? You know considering she's a woman." Hidan teased and laughed at Deidara's futile attempt to punch him in the arm.

"Shut the hell up Hidan, yeah. I'm a man, you dick. If anyone should know that it's you, yeah." Deidara snapped back and crossed his arms with a childish pout on his face.

"Anyways, I think we should just give this one a no and throw it back to Kakashi. Just tell him that-" Kiba tried but was cut off but a rather loud cheer from the back of the room.

"Are you serious? You're telling me I can get free Ichiraku Ramen for a whole week and all I have to do is be shirtless for a day? Bring it on! How are you guys seriously chickening out from this kind of offer!? I mean did you not here the man? Free. Food." Naruto though it was a great idea although it was probably just the excitement of his first Akatsuki event; he didn't know and honestly he didn't care. He needed a way to make everyone else cooperate. He would not let his first ever event get turned down and besides weeks' worth of free ramen? He was already in line with his coupon ready.

"No, it's fine though I can understand how you guys may feel inferior to me. I mean it's clearly obvious I'd win anyways. I obviously have the best body here so no need to test it; Neji, might as well hand me that voucher now and tell Kakashi to dump the event. These guys are right they'd never win." He teased the group hoping to get a reaction from at least someone, and thankfully he did.

"Are you kidding me!? You'd never win blondie! I have a way better body than you! You'd have to be blind not to see that!" Kiba instantly stood from his spot on the floor and slammed his clenched fists against the table in front of him. "I'll beat you to a pulp with all the tips I get!" He continued and a more friendly competitive tone rather than just straight out anger towards the blonde.

"No offensive Kiba-" Deidara began in a bragging and condescending tone towards the shaggy brown-haired teen "But it's obvious your body is scrawny and lanky. You'd probably get more tips from the wild hounds out back rather than the girls who come into Akatsuki, yeah." A knowing smirk spread across his face.

"I-I think everybody has beautiful body, we should all just accept-" A shy Hinata tried her best efforts to interfere in what she could tell would become an all-out blood bath if someone didn't intervene soon.

Sasuke quietly scoffed before addressing the now super competitive blonde "I doubt you could get a single tip from anyone. Man, women or child." He calmly stated as if it were a fact of life, leaning calmly back into one of the few black leather chairs in the room.

"What was that, teme!?" Now it was Naruto's turn to slam his fists roughly against the dark mahogany table and push up from just re-sitting back on the floor "I bet I could get two times- NO! Ten times the amount of tips you could get!" He screeched, his angry competitive side coming into full bloom and he honestly couldn't be happier. he hadn't had anything to be truly competitive about for a long time. Despite his angry appearance; inside; the blonde was really happy. He couldn't help but think in the back of his mind that he'd really love it here at Akatsuki.

The ever-quiet Sai cleared his throat before speaking his ever faithful knowledge over the low mumbles and subtle arguments that were starting to grow louder by the second.

"Did you know one in ten European babies are born from people having sex on IKEA mattresses?" The room suddenly feel silent and all gazes looked toward the centre of the sudden statement.

"…"

"…"

"…"

And with that random odd yet interesting fact from Sai the entire group delved into an all-out argument about who get the most tips from both men and women alike a well as other petty quarrels that had suddenly arisen in the crossfire of random insults and lame comebacks. The quiet raven in the corner couldn't help but feel slightly amused at the whole situation; these meetings usually went swiftly, they'd just all agree or turn down an event and these meetings would be over within half an hour; an hour at max if a bigger event was being discussed, let alone any arguing going on. They'd all moulded to have the same tastes and opinions after working together for so long.

Yet little did the raven know everyone had the same thoughts as him. Now that they all thought about it ninety percent of the events suggested by Kakashi were turned down… and they never really thought of ideas on their own they just all assumed Kakashi would come up with all the ideas for them… They didn't really get into the events they just merely participated in them… Maybe; just maybe this Naruto Uzumaki guy would be good for Akatsuki… They all had a feeling in the back of their minds that this café wouldn't be the same.

By the end if the meeting they'd all decided after three hours of arguing, hurt feelings, body complaints and self-consciousness they agreed shirtless day was going to happen and instead of competing for tips they were going to have a competition for all the ladies and gentlemen who came in that day to put in a vote of who they thought had the best body, the winner with the most votes was now who got blessed with the weeks' worth of food which was now about to be fought over like it was the last shred of food on earth.

Let the games begin!

Hope you enjoyed that one! :D The first chapter of hopefully many! third and fourth chapter are in the works and I'll hopefully update soon! I also have a few one shot ideas in mind.. -laughs evilly- If you notice any spelling errors or have an idea for a pairing please let me know! constructive criticism is welcome!

(1) - A two way door is a door that can be pushed from either side and doesn't have any handles, it's a little dangerous because when you push it, it tends to fling back quite a bit... Hopefully it'll knock someone over later on.. ehehehe

Don't forget to Review! Dattebayo!