CRUCIBLE

A/N: Takes place near the end of season two, but does not follow the same timeline of the show in regards to the finale. The focus is on Shay (because I think she is one of the most underwritten other lead female character on the show, so I always write about her) with Shayveride and Shawson friendship. There are also hints of Shevon and Sharice. But mostly/eventually Shafferty (cause I am still pissed they cut the scene in the cross over episode). Anyways, I hope I end up writing something that is worth reading.

SYNOPSIS: After a tragedy hits Shay, she becomes a shell of her former self. She keeps her distance, doesn't open up to anybody, and her family at 51 think it's Darryl all over again. Meanwhile, House 51 gets a transfer firefighter, who may not have the best intentions.

CHAPTER ONE

OTIS looked at Cruz, with a mix of curiousness and disgust across his face, as he watched his friend attempt to make Dominican food for lunch at 51 again.

"What exactly are you making us again?" Otis finally asked, which caused Cruz to turn away from the stove and face him.

With a big smile on his face, Cruz responded, "My family's secret recipe. It was passed down from my great-great grandmother, to my great-grandmother, to my grandmother, and finally to my mother."

Herrmann, who had been quietly reading the Chicago Tribune paper at the table, half laughed as he said, "Who then passed it on to you?"

"Yeah!" Cruz said excitedly, but the looks he got from the men in the room told him they didn't share his excitement.

Otis gave Cruz a sympathetic look. "You're skilled at many things, Cruz. But cooking is not one of them."

"Very funny guys, but when you taste this amazing family recipe, you'll be begging for more."

"In the meantime," Otis began to say as he started to head toward the apparatus bay, "I am going to see if I can beg Mills to cook us something in case you butcher your family's sacred recipe."

"At least he is cooking for us," Mouch said, once the program he was watching cut to a commercial. "Which is more than you have done for us this week."

"Thank you, Mouch," Cruz said, just as Otis had left. "But you think you could have stuck up for me before he left?"

"He's your roommate, Cruz. And besides, my programming was very interesting. I couldn't look away."

"You mean your soap-opera was very interesting," Herrmann reminded. "Had I known you were into those types of things, I would have asked my wife to come down and watch it with you so you both could gush over who-is-dating-who."

Cruz turned back to the stove to stir the pot. He looked down at Pouch, who was lying down on the floor lazily. "See what we gotta put up with?"

Pouch only softly whined.

DAWSON stepped out of the back of the Ambo, and shut the door behind her. She smiled as she saw Casey approach her.

"Feel any different now that you passed your Firefighter's exam?" He asked as he put his arms around her waist.

She looked deeply into his blue eyes. There were actually a lot of things she was feeling. Nervous. Excited. Happy. Scared. Accomplished. Sad. None of those things she would openly tell Casey just yet. After all, she needed her own time to digest the information that she won't be coming back to 51.

"I feel…unstoppable," She finally managed to say.

"You are," He affirmed placing his hands on her shoulder firmly. "You're Gabriella Dawson. Nothing can hold you back."

"She's a storm to be reckoned with, that's for sure," Mills said as he walked by the two of them.

"You all better stop complementing me like that. I'm going to get a God-complex."

"Impossible," Casey said as they made their way to the Squad table, where Severide, Capp, Newhouse and Tony were playing poker.

"Hey, has anyone seen Shay?" Dawson asked.

"She had to make a phone call," Severide answered without looking up from his cards. "To Devon."

Otis, who had been watching the card game, sighed heavily. "I can't believe she is gave her another chance after what she did."

"Believe me, I am not happy about it," Severide responded, and the bitterness was evident in his voice. "But Shay can't see Devon is no good for her. She says she isn't holding a torch for this woman, and yet, Devon is staying over at our place, when the last time that happened she ripped us off with our stuff."

He slams his cards down on the table. "I fold."

"She must have her reason," Newhouse piped up. "Everyone always has a reason."

"Have you talked with Shay about it?" Dawson asked Severide. Newhouse may have been right about Shay having a reason for letting Devon stay, but whatever that reason was, she was out of the loop.

"I gave her an ultimatum. Either Devon goes, or I go."

Capp, who is normally quiet, looked at his Lieutenant. "Isn't that a bit…harsh?"

"What did she say?" Mills asked.

"I don't know. She never game me an answer, only told me she was going to call Devon."

Dawson was about to say something, but she was interrupted by Chief Boden walking through the apparatus bay, followed by a Caucasian man with brown hair and hazel eyes, looking to be around the same age and build as Casey and Severide.

"Everyone, in the boardroom. Now."

CRUZ'S Dominican lunch would have to wait, as everyone gathered in the boardroom. Chief had waited until everyone was settled before he looked over to his right to introduce the mysterious man who was standing beside him.

"I'd like to introduce everyone to James Allister. Allister transferred from House 42. He'll be joining Truck 81. I expect everyone to give him a warm welcome."

Allister cleared his throat. "I'm really excited to be here."

"Hey Allister, how do you feel about Dominican food?" Cruz asked.

"It's good…" Allister said somewhat confused by the laughter coming from the men in the house.

Casey stood up and went over to greet Allister. "I'm Lieutenant Matthew Casey. You'll be riding with me and these fools on Truck 81." He pointed to where Otis, Cruz, Herrmann, and Mouch were sitting.

"Nice to meet you Lieutenant," Allister said as he shook hands with Casey.

"Over there is Lieutenant Kelly Severide. He runs Squad 3."

"This is quite a nice house," Allister commented.

"It's the very best," Chief Boden said. "Make yourself at home."

"SO, we got another new guy in the house," Dawson said, breaking the silence that filled the back of the Ambulance as she and Shay were doing inventory.

Shay sighed as she finished placing the last of the gauze into the cabinets. "I know. Complete bummer. With you going, you would think the Universe would throw me a bone and give me another piece of eye candy."

Dawson laughed as she playfully threw an empty box at Shay. "Was that all I was to you, Shay? Eye candy?"

"The best eye candy a lesbian could ask for," Shay said as she batted her eyes, which caused Dawson to laugh again. "But seriously though. I am so proud of you, and I love you, and you are going to be great."

"Thanks Shay. Your support means the world to me. And who knows, maybe you'll get a female partner to replace me and you can use her as eye candy."

Now it was Shay's turn to throw back the empty box at Dawson. "They already have the person lined up. Kevin Winebate."

"Oh," Dawson said, and she tried her best to hide the sadness and shock in her voice that this was actually happening, and that she was already replaced. "They couldn't get Rafferty?"

"Rafferty is on Ambo 74. With Chout." Shay paused, and then said, "I guess I'll be the only woman in a house full of men – and believe me, the irony in all of this does not escape me."

Dawson gave Shay a sympathetic smile. She took a deep breath, noticing her opportunity. "Speaking of women…"

Shay froze, knowing where the conversation was headed next.

"Kelly told me the situation…with Devon."

"I'm going to figure it out," Shay said. "After shift. I'm going to go home and talk to Devon. And I know what you are probably thinking –about me giving her a second chance, but it's complicated."

"Say no more," Dawson said. "But just remember, you got to figure this out. It's between you and Devon. Not between you and Severide."

Shay nodded her head offering Dawson a small smile.

IT took Shay six bars, and half the night, to finally find Devon.

When she had come home from her shift, she had planned to talk with Devon over dinner – just the two of them, to sort everything out, and talk about the ultimatum Kelly had given her. Instead what she found was a note from Devon with the words, 'I'm sorry. I'll pay everything back when I can.' And like that, Devon was gone again (with her things only this time).

This was unacceptable to Shay. Earlier that day they promised each other they were going to talk, and that was what she was going to do. She didn't care if she spent all night looking for Devon; the two of them were going to talk.

"Devon," Shay said once she noticed the brunette walk out of a dive-looking bar alone, and out to the now empty street.

Devon froze, and it took her a minute to turn around and face Shay. "Leslie."

"Don't Leslie me," Shay said as she walked closer to Devon. "We were supposed to talk, and instead I find"—she pulls out a piece of paper from her pocket and holds it up to Devon's face—"this."

Devon looked around, avoiding eye contact with Shay. "I needed to make sure you knew I have every intention of paying you and your roommates back."

"We were supposed to talk," Shay said as if she completely ignored what Devon had just said to her.

"I know. But I didn't—I couldn't—you shouldn't have to choose between Kelly and me. You've been friends for god-knows-how long, and I betrayed you in the worst possible way. I made the choice for you so you wouldn't have to."

Shay was taken aback, but Devon continued talking, "It's easier for me to go. I haven't had the easiest life, Leslie. My mom was abusive. I can't even count how many times she has given me a black eye. My dad, when he wasn't drinking, did his best for me, and saved my ass more times than I can count…"

Devon trailed off slightly, and after she regained her composure, she continued. "Most of the women in my life have been one-night stands. I have never even been close to falling or even loving someone. I don't get close to people because I know I fuck everything up, one way or another. But then I met you, and I felt different, you know? You made me feel things I never felt before."

"But Kelly is right. What I did is unforgivable. I betrayed you in the worst possible way because I was too stupid to ask for help. I got your message, on my phone, and I do care for you, that's why I want to make things right. But I don't know why. I don't know why, after all I have done, you gave me a second chance."

Silence over came the two of them as they stared into each other's eyes. After a moment, Shay, purely out of impulse, grabbed Devon and kissed her. Hard. Shocking the both of them.

"I gave you a second chance," Shay began to say after she pulled apart from the kiss. "Because I loved you. You were there for me when I needed someone. We all make mistakes, Devon."

"I seem to make a lot of them," Devon said with a sad sigh.

Shay grabbed Devon's hand. "Come back to my place. We'll figure this out in the morning, okay?"

"I really shouldn't."

"I am not taking no for an answer."

Devon sighed. "My truck is parked up the street."

Shay put out her hand, and Devon reached into her pocket and silently placed her keys in Shay's hand.

"After you," Shay said and she began to wordlessly follow Devon back to her truck.

Shay was so caught up in her own mind about how she was going to explain this to Kelly without losing him, that she didn't even hear the two cars speeding down the street. She only heard a loud 'Pop' noise, followed by Devon screaming her name, as she fell to the ground, and then another loud 'Pop' noise followed by her screaming Devon's name, as she saw Devon fall to the ground.

The last thing Shay saw was Devon, unmoving, before everything went black.