(To) Clyde, Token, Kenny, Wendy, Bebe:

Mission getting into Tweek's pants is a go. I'll report after the dirty deed is done.

Craig smirks down at his phone; he absolutely made sure he had sent the message to Kenny. He wanted nothing more than to tick him off the most. Getting laid was his main mission – pissing off Kenny was an amusing little side mission all to himself.

Oh, wait.

Kenny was going to have a little entertaining of his own after school today, he remembers. 'I wonder who that call was from…' He groans as he never got the answer and it was truly eating at him to know. But he couldn't think of that right now, he was way too busy.

Craig was so happy when they made it inside his house. It was freakin' freezing outside and the only thing he had for coverage was his skimpy blue hoodie. His favorite blue hoodie.

"Gah!" He heard Tweek squeal out and he realized that the house was as dark as night. Yeah, no, it wasn't dark at all but of course this was Tweek and the spazz was afraid. He was afraid of everything though.

Work your charm, his mind told him.

Craig smirks once again because man this was already seriously going according to plan and he hadn't even planned anything out to begin with. He steps right behind Tweek and wraps his arms around his frail and tiny waist. Craig was going to try his best to seduce the twitchy boy. Well, he would try. And it was going to be easy, or so he thought it would be easy because hey, Craig is attractive. Everyone else seems to think so.

However it wasn't as simple as he thought for as soon as he took the blonde in his arms the true spasm began. "GAH!" Tweek cried loudly and his arms started to flail. Before Craig had time to withdraw himself from the boy, an elbow swung upwards and connected with Craig's chin. Slamming his teeth together and oh god it hurt so much that Craig instinctively pushed Tweek away as he recoiled, stepping backwards.

"Ah, sh-," He stopped himself from finishing that sentence as he took hold of his face in pain. Craig couldn't let go of his chin at this point, the pain was just too much. Man… did this really just happen? He groaned to himself.

He rubbed over the skin – there was without a doubt going to be a bruise in the morning. He could absolutely feel it. When the pain does subside, Craig turns around to face the blonde. He tries his best to stop glaring but it's in vein.

"Oh Christ!" Tweek grabs a fistful of his shirt and starts tugging hard. "Pl-Please don't kill me, Craig!" He begs.

"What the fuck, Tweek?" He bites out, "I feel like I chipped a tooth…." That's exactly what he needed with the rest of the flaws in his mouth.

"Oh man! You can't be serious!" Tweek's eyes are wide and panicked. "I-I can't afford to pay dental bills! Jesus! I don't make that much at Harbucks, dude!"

"What? You expect me to show you sympathy?" Craig frowns, "You're the one who did this. It's not my fault you freak over every little thing."

"I thought it was a murderer! I thought he was going to slit my throat!"

"I was right behind you. What? Did you think I was going to kill you?"

Tweek doesn't answer and oh my god Craig wanted to yell at him. And he would have if it wasn't for the words that came out of Tweek's mouth right after.

"I-I'll make it up to you!" A promise follows suit, as does a gah!

Craig stops and processes this a moment. Tweek was propositioning him – was this the opening Craig was waiting for?

"Anything?" He asks before he even realizes he's even opened his mouth. He wants to lick his lips, he feels like a wolf stalking its prey. Kind of feels like a little rush, he might be enjoying this moment way too much.

"Well…" Tweek seems to be hesitant now and Craig thinks he's losing him. He can't let that happen.

"But you did say anything, Tweekers." He tries his best to sound playful. Not eager at all.

"That's true…"

Got him.

Craig flips the living room light on and the whole room is illuminated with the glow that seems to calm Tweek down even more. He coax's his target over to the couch so he'd be more comfortable but Tweek sits right at the edge. But that's okay, Craig can work with that. He has experience with the shy type – Red being a perfect example, but that memory is for another time.

A little small talk and some tiny touches and Tweek will be putty in his hands. Then again… He thinks. This is Tweek after all. He's spastic and unpredictable. You'll never know what he'll do or who he'll hurt. His chin throbs a bit.

"Cr-Craig?"

Craig puts his sights back on the blonde, "Yeah?"

"Uhm…" He fiddles with his shirt a little more, "Wh-Why did you invite me over to your house?"

Oh lord, Craig sighs. "Because we're dating, Tweek." He reminds him once again. "This is what you do when you date." Well… it's not the only thing you do, but we'll get to that in no time.

"I-I know but…" Tweek trails off a bit.

"But what?"

"I mean… Whywouldyouwant.. Jesus! Want to spend time with me when Red Racer is on?"

Oh dear god. Craig couldn't believe he forgot about his most favorite show in the whole world. How was that even possible? Craig quickly looks around, searching for the remote with his eyes. He finally finds it and grabs at it hastily – turning the tv on and just in time to see the opening credits of his show.

He exhales deeply; he made it just in time.

"Thanks Tweek…" He relaxes back into the couch and glues his eyes to the show.

"Y-You're welcome." He thinks he can feel Tweek smiling but he ignores it and continues to watch Red Racer.

The credits are rolling and he and Tweek can't stop laughing.

That was such a great and hilarious episode and Craig had found out that Tweek likes the show as well and it seems like Tweek has become more comfortable. Craig is glad and he can't stop smiling.

"Blue Racer sucks so much..."

"Y-Yeah." Tweek agrees easily, "He's a total douche, man. I hate that guy. I love ngh...Green Racer."

"I love Red Racer." Craig smiles again. But he doesn't say anything about Green Racer and Red Racer being best friends and how ironic this situation has become. So he remains quiet and just keeps it to himself all together.

"Hey you want something to drink before the next episode?" Craig offers. He stands and heads straight for the kitchen. He knows he shouldn't but he grabs for one of his dad's beers – it's not like he'll miss it anyway.

"C-Coffee, please."

Craig isn't surprised and fills and turns the coffee maker on.

"Is that the only thing you ever drink? I mean, for real?"

"No…"

Craig makes his way back into the living room and flops down on the couch, he takes a swig of the beer and he notices that Tweek won't stop staring.

He snickers, "Do you disapprove?"

Wide eyes finally blink and he shakes his head quickly, "N-No.. I mean, ngh! I-It's none of my b-business after all!" He watches as Tweek slides a hand into his tangled and ratted hair. His fingers curve and grip and his hands begin to tug roughly. Craig observes for only a few seconds before he leans over and takes hold of Tweek's hand, gently pulling it out of his hair.

"Don't do that." He whispers.

There it is again. Tweek has stopped shaking. He's stopped shaking and isn't moving at all. It's so cute, Craig admits. But he doesn't understand. What makes Tweek just calm down so suddenly like that? Is it because of a person's touch? Or perhaps it was because of Craig's touch alone… Everyone knows that Tweek has a thing for Craig. It's always been that way. But, just how much did the blonde truly like him? Was it this much? So much that his shaking would immediately subside when Craig was close to him like this?

Craig holds Tweek's hand a little bit tighter.

Whoa, calm down there buddy. He remembers and lets go of Tweek, smiling. He doesn't want to scare the blonde off this early.

There's a small little noise that comes from the kitchen. "Coffee's ready." Craig stands once again and disappears into the other room. Tweek follows him this time - Craig hands him a cup and Tweek gets his own drink. Why wasn't his thermos with him?

Why do you care?

"Tweek, where's your thermos?" He can't help himself.

"I-I broke it... Ngh.." His eyes hold small amounts of sadness and Craig can't help but feel bad.

"OH.. Sorry about that man."

"Thanks.." Tweek is kind of smiling, kind of.

Craig walks over to Tweek, he wants to try and put a real big smile on his face somehow, he grabs Tweek's cup and takes a huge gulp of the contents. It's like liquid fire for him and man that stuff is really strong but Craig can hang.

"J-Jesus! Craig.. You like coffee?"

Craig licks his lips and smirks, "Of course I do. I love coffee." He made sure to put as much emphasis on 'love' as he could. He hands the cup back to him and he feels rather confident at this moment.

"I d-didn't know that." OH, now Tweek is really smiling and Craig smiles.

"Well, pay attention more, Tweekers. You'll be surprised at what you'll find."

They make it back to the living room and sit down once again. They turn their attention back to the tv for the second episode of Red Racer, they're so fixated on it that no words are exchanged, just the occasional gah from Tweek and some chuckles here and there from the hilarity of the show. Tweek sneaks in between commercials to get refills and before both of them even realize it the coffee pot is empty and Craig's managed to drink three beers. His dad WILL notice that when he gets home but Craig is feeling pretty good and doesn't care.

He's not drunk or tipsy, but everything looks great from his point of view. He hears Tweek curse from beside of him - he looks and sees how into the show Tweek is and it makes Craig smile again. He never knew someone other than him liked the show this much. Everyone else thought it was stupid or lame or cheesy or something. He hated those guys for it. But it's okay, because Tweek likes it. Tweek likes him.

His phone goes off and he reaches into his pocket to retrieve it.

(From) Token:

I'm coming over right now to stop you.

Crap.

Craig raises up and frowns at the screen. Damn it, Token.

He doesn't have the time to waist anymore. He hates rushing but it seems like things have changed.

"Hey Tweek." He relaxes once again and looks over at the blonde.

Tweek looks over at him and sips the last of his drink, "Y-Yeah?"

Craig puts the empty bottle down and leans over a bit, just enough to make Tweek lean back against the armrest and not be able to move any farther back. He slides one hard on the armrest it's self, the other resting at the top of the couch cushion. "Tweek... Can I kiss you?"

Wide doe eyes, filled with panic.

"C-Craig... Ngh... Your drunk."

Craig shakes his head simply, "Nah, not drunk. Just, really wanna kiss you."

"B-But..." Tweek isn't really shaking anymore, Craig knows it's because he's so close to him now. Because Tweek seems to calm down if someone is close. "M-Mono man!" He says quickly and loudly and it throws Craig off a bit. "I don't want a kissing disease!"

Wait.. What? "Tweek.." The noirette frowns, "I don't have mono."

"You kiss everyone though! Jesus!" He grits his teeth. "I know how many people you've kissed, th-the only person who has ...ngh kissed more than you is Kenny!"

Craig moves back a bit because Tweek seems to be freaking out real well at this point. He's spastic.

"I... Ireallywannakissyouthough!" He squeals out. Oh, Craig definitely heard that, no matter how fast Tweek spoke, he caught it. He loves that sometimes the blonde with scream out honesty and can't control it. It works out in his favor.

"Then, let me kiss you, Tweek." He whispers.

Tweek stops moving as Craig leans forward. He tilts his head to the side and their noses brush together - he presses his lips against the blondes. The kiss was nothing like Craig expected it to be. He thought it would be bad, he presumed cold lips, cold chapped lips. He thought about the taste of stale coffee, which seemed like the worst. But it wasn't. Tweek's lips were warm and inviting and so soft. It caused Craig to lean in more - the taste was something else. Yes, he tasted like coffee but it wasn't as strong and it almost tasted sweet.

"M-Mm." Tweek makes a small noise and Craig continues to deepen the kiss. He can't stop himself from placing his hand on the blondes cheek, holding him. Tweek isn't moving his lips at all but he didn't care. He assumed this was Tweek's first kiss and he had no idea what he was meant to be doing. So Craig offers support. He slowly opens his mouth for him. Tweek seems to understand and timidly slides his tongue inside.

The kiss is sloppy and innocent and far from perfect but Craig still enjoys it. Tweek can't kiss for shit but that doesn't matter.

Man... Why was Craig's heart racing so fast?

BANGBANGBANG

Someone starts banging on the door hard and it seems to have brought Tweek out of his kiss induced mind because the next thing Craig feels is a missing mouth, followed by a very hard head slamming right into his nose.

Not again!

He grabs at his face for the second time that day and falls backwards on the couch in pain. It's so mind numbing and Craig finds himself rolling off the couch and falling right on the floor. He tastes blood.

He doesn't see Tweek when he finaly opens his eyes - he must have screamed and took off. What he does see, however, is a certain rich asshole standing over him and smirking.

"Yeah, you deserve that." Token remarks

Craig flips him off.

-/-

Wow, another update. What's that about? Ha.