A/N Okay this is my first Harry Potter Fanfic since 2009. I've been revisiting my childhood and I wanted to write a Fanfic as a small project in between my job and University. So I might forget some of the small facts, but nothing big, about Harry Potter. Seeing how this is an AU I don't think I will have much trouble. That being said, this is also my first attempt at SeverusxLily. I just finished reading another Snily redemption fic and wanted to take my own spin on the situation. I have not read too many Snily fics, so if it appears I am using someone else's ideas, it is pure coincidence. But I know redemption stories have been done time and time again. I just want to see if I can write one with a more mature tone. Anyway, please review and let me know how I am doing. Feedback would be great.

Blood was dripping down his chest, choking Severus Snape's airway. He could see the boy, Potter, looking at him. His face, it was full of pity, leaving him appearing more like Lily than James.

'Lily.' Severus thought to himself bitterly. 'You were even on my mind now, of all things.'

The world was going dark, and Severus could no longer focus on Harry. Everything was melting away into a numbing blackness that swallowed Severus whole in one gulp as his eyes finally shut and he let out one last rattling breath. Weightlessness settled in an almost endless falling sensation. Severus would have kept his eyes shut if weren't for the blinding white light that penetrated from behind his eyelids. Cautiously, Severus squinted opened his eyes to see a white foggy expanse of green fields. Slowly Severus turned trying to get his bearings. Indistinct shapes were behind the fog;and when Severus moved closer to the objects his foot painfully hooked on something, causing Severus to crush onto the sand. Stunned by the shock of his very real weight, Severus saw the outlining of an eerily familiar sandbox.

Faintly, he heard children playing. Vague memories of himself and a young girl playing started inside his mind. Their images were there, appearing right next to him, digging with sticks. It was then, that Severus knew he was dead.

Still, he stood up as diligently as he could before shaking his cloak free of sand. The children disipating as his thoughts shifted from them.

It was clear he was near his childhood home and this caused Severus to scowl, "What in God's sake am I doing here?"

"I suppose that is a good question." A voice stated behind him commented.

Quickly, Severus turned around to see someone he didn't take great pleasure in seeing. "Albus."

"Good evening, Severus. Though I suppose it isn't evening here." Albus said nonchalantly noted to the grey, afternoon light before inviting himself to stand next to Severus.

"Why are you here? Are you somehow connected to my own personal hell?" Severus asked dryly not sure if he should waste his time caring he was in purgatory.

"Goodness no. More like a crossroads I suppose. I suspect you have many happy memories here." Albus answered before settling himself on a metal, colorful pony that rocked under his weight momentarily.

"Some... most." Severus answered cryptically, not wanting to remember his home life.

"Ah as is with most life." Albus commented as if he was an expert in Severus' life. Maybe he was. He certainly knew more about Severus then most Wizards or Witches.

"What do you want, Albus? I wish to spend my eternity in..." Severus motioned to the foggy surroundings, "whatever you call this, alone."

"Sounds a bit grim to experience, don't you think Severus?" Albus inquired, looking up at Severus' disinterested face. "You always have that face when you are faced with something you don't want to do."

"You would know this face very well, wouldn't you." Severus said flatly. His answer, nonetheless, caused Albus Dumbledore to smile.

"This is true. But I wonder Severus. Do you wish to stay here?" This caused Severus to darkly inspect Albus critically. Was he some type of trick of his mind? Was he imaging all of this in his dying brain.

"Is this a trick question?"

"No. I believe this is as straight forward of an question as I can ask." Albus said before folding his hands on his lap. With a slight cock of his head, he asked once again, "Does this place look like paradise to you, Severus?"

"Of course not. No one would want to spend their eternity in a foggy, Muggle playground." Severus snapped harshly.

"Then I take it, you don't wish to stay here." Albus inquired once more with an even bigger smile that made Severus sneer involuntarily.

"That's indeed what I just stated." Severus made painfully clear.

Albus repositioned himself on the child toy, before continuing, "We all have regrets, Severus. Some of us more than others. But some would go back, if they could. Would you?"

"What? And live my life differently?" Severus hissed. He had to be joking, Severus was convinced. But the way Dumbledore kept smiling knowingly up at Severus, made him realize that the man wasn't joking. "To go through life again, through all the pain and misery. To go through death once more..." Severus said smoothly his eyes looking pass Albus and into the fog where he knew if he peered hard enough he could see Lily's door.

"Death, is inevitable no matter if you pick it now or another time, Severus. But pain and misery can change into joy and love if one has the constitution enough to try." Albus stated simply.

"There isn't anything for me there. No one I care for or whom I wish to see again." Severus revealed darkly. "I don't see much of a point."

"Ah, but Severus, I am not talking about the now, I am talking about the then." This caused Severus to look at Albus once more, his eyes burning with questions.

"To which then? To before I became a Death Eater? Back when Lily and I played in this sandbox?" Severus questioned as he started to weight his options seriously.

"Time cannot erase everything. Those who are supposed to be born, will be born." Albus pointedly spoke. So no matter what Lily would marry James. No matter what Harry Potter would be born, Severus understood that clearly.

"Then what can it grant me?" Severus asked coldly. "She was all I ever wanted."

"Another chance, to gain her trust and love once more." Albus answered so softly Severus barely registered it.

The idea was alluring even if he knew he would have to receive it as she was married to James Potter of all people. If he could just speak with her, hear her voice again, life would have been much more fulfilled. But was it worth it?

"I don't think I ever wanted a chance at redemption... yet..." Severus trailed off remembering all of those nights he would revisit his memories in the pensive just to see Lily one last time. Seeing her smile at him in his memories made protecting her son more bearable. A chance to experience more than what little time they were friends together, seemed too much of a dream to be real.

Yet... it was too good of an opportunity to give up.

"Very well. What do I have to do." Severus answered with deep conviction, his brows knitting together.

"Nothing." Albus said in a whispery voice. "As you can probably already see, it has already begun." The world began to run like a watery water color painting. Albus' clear blue eyes blurred with the rest of his face and Severus simultaneously felt dizzy as everything streaked and faded. Cradling his head in his hands, Severus waited for the whole world to stop spinning. A harsh wind began to bellow, the fog whisped around Severus and the melting world. Then suddenly it stilled.

When he opened his eyes, Severus found himself standing in exactly the same spot. Except with the fog gone, everything had a vibrant color of reality. A soft breeze stirred his dark locks, almost as if on cue to tell Severus he was living once more. Looking down, Severus feared to see his old, dirty, and ill fitting Muggle clothing. Instead he saw his typically black robes and expensive cotton and tight fitting doublet he wore even into his final years. He was a full grown wizard, he supposed. But, then again, he vaguely remembered receiving new clothing from his inherited wealth from his departed Grandfather during his last summer at Spinner's End.

"Stop it, James!" A loud squeal followed by laughter peeped Severus' ears.

Across the street was Lily being spun around in James' arms. A scowl tugged at Severus' lips. What a perfect place to be teleported back to.

"Date me." James crowed loudly as he placed Lily on her feet. Instantly she began to walk away but James reached for her hand. "Oh come on! Admit it! You had the time of your life buying your school supplies with me!"

Lily stopped and to Severus' disgust he saw Potter, maturely and tenderly reach around Lily from the behind before whispering something to her. For a moment, Severus thought he would see Lily give in. Yet, at the last moment, Severus watched Lily pull away from him.

"You never get over yourself, Potter." Lily barely said loud enough for Severus to hear. But the rest of the conversation disappeared into murmured sounds. Severus still watched the exchange until the two teens entered the nice, well groomed house.

A dead sensation twisted in Severus' heart. Had fate cruelly teleported him back in time, too late to never call Lily a 'Mudblood' and to witness Lily Evans to fall in love with James Potter all over again? It appeared so. And standing there in the sandbox, Severus could only shakily roll up his sleeve to witness a luckily Death Mark-less wrist.

Was that his only reward? He hadn't officially joined the Dark Lord?

To most, that would be a relief. But to Severus, it left a sour taste in his mouth. It was his only benefit. There was no Lily, just her judging eyes every time he tried to apologize. And it had been well over a year now since their fall out. Now there was only his fellow soon-to-be Dark Wizard classmates, waiting for him at Hogwarts. And, even though Severus wasn't sure about the date, he was sure he was about to enter his seventh year at Hogwarts.

Two years from now, Lily Evans Potter, would be dead.