:: Kitzaku-san ::

Disclaimer: I do not own Yu Gi Oh! T.T Nor will I ever... all I have is two very deranged muses. I don't own Blues Clues either!

Authoress' Note: Don't ask? U.u Well, I've decided that I love writing YGO stories... so expect to see very many. I'm... not really sure if I've seen a Blue's Clues parody somewhere before... but if I did. GOMEN NASAI!!!! If I'm just hallucinating, then... I hope you enjoy! The bit about the refrigerator comes from Sounds of Anime by AnimeFly.

Thanks: Marisa the Allmighty Pineapple! She helped me out with the plotline for this pointless fic... ^.^

:: Jou's Clues ::

For some very strange reason, annoyingly loud and cheerful music sounded about a house that looked as if it was made out of cardboard. Yami poked his head out the window at me and smiled. He was wearing a green horizontally striped shirt and khaki pants.

"Hello, Ryou! So glad could make it!" he grinned at me. Then his head disappeared back into his house and he opened the front door to let me in. I've been here before, believe me. And Yami is the world's strangest man. Acts like I'm three but what can you expect from a thousand year old Pharaoh, right?

Yami runs into his living room, where Jounouchi, his 'pet' who looks more human than a dog, was sleeping on a giant red chair. I smile and scratch him behind the ears and he whimpers a little. So adorable.

"Today, we're playing Dual Monsters." Yami placed his hands on his hips. "And you can join us if you want to."

I smiled and nodded at Yami's invitation. I love to play Dual Monsters, so of course I would accept. But a soft wailing catches my attention, and I turn around to see Yugi dressed up like a shovel and sniffling.

Yami looks surprised. "Why, Yugi! What's wrong?"

Yugi sniffed and wiped his eyes. "I can't find my Dual Monster's Deck!"

Yami sighed. "Well then, we'll help you find your deck, little shovel!" He reassured him. Jou's ears perked up and he suddenly woke up.

"Bau bau!" He barked and turned in circles.

"What's that Jou?" Yami bent over. "You know where Yugi's Deck is!" Jou nodded. "Will you tell us?"

Instead of leading us all to Yugi's deck, Jou came up to me and stamped a Sapphire paw print card on my forehead. Yami gasped.

"You want to play Jou's Clues! YAY!" Yami clapped. "Will you help us, Ryou?" he looked up to me with giant eyes... which may have been hard for him considering his aibou was the one that did the puppy eyes. Having said that, I looked to Yugi and indeed the shovel was doing that as well.

So I nodded. "I'll help you."

"YAY!" Yami pranced about and sang. "We are gonna play Jou's clues, because we're really smart!" He danced some more and went about explaining the rules. "We gotta find a paw print, and that's the first clue! We put it in our notebook cos they're who's clues?"

"JOE'S CLUES!" Some unknown children sang.

He sang some more of the rules and when he reached the end of the song. "... and we sit down in our thinking chairs and think... think... think..." Upon sitting in his chair, he accidentally sat on Jou, who had made it back there somehow. The 'dog' yelped and jumped down, running off somewhere. "Oh my..." Yami placed a hand to his forehead. "Did you see where Jou went, Ryou?"

I point left and Yami stands up and bows. "Thank you! Come on! Let's follow and we'll find out where Yugi's Deck is!"

I pull the Sapphire Paw print card off my forehead and follow Yami into the kitchen. He's walking very funny and slow. It's kind of annoying, but I don't want to say anything, lest I anger him. I look about. Every time I come into his kitchen, something new is written on the refrigerator. It's fun to read what it says.

Today: Can I be Pikachu?

I shrug. Perhaps some authoress came in and wrote that. But something else caught my eye. It was a Sapphire Paw print card and it was resting on a soap dish near the sink.

"Say, Yami." I catch his attention. "There's a clue right there!"

Yami looked angry. "I do not put glue in my hair!"

"I said a CLUE!"

"Oh!" Yami turned red. I swear, he can be a bit of an airhead at times. But he can't help it if his hearing isn't good. He finally notices the clue and grins. "It's a soap dish! Time for our handy dandy... notebook!"

Ding.

After a bit of muttering, Yami manages to conjure up a horrible drawing of a happy soap dish. He taps his chin with his green crayon and thinks for a moment. "Where would Jou hide Yugi's Deck?"

"In the bathroom." I shrug.

"Maybe..." Yami grins. "But we need more clues!" He placed the notebook back in his pocket and a little shout caught his attention. Seto popped up, dressed in a salt shaker costume. I shake my head. Yami's household really does have problems...

"Bonjour!" he had a French accent, which was sort of odd for him. I he said all the words exactly as if they were written. Anyone who truly spoke French would be very cross with him. "I need your help Yami! Anzu and I are making lunch for Mokuba, but we have no idea how!"

Yami gasped. "We'll help! Won't we, Ryou?"

I nodded and Seto led us to Anzu dressed as a peppershaker and Mokuba was a paprika container and cooing quite happily. Like I said, they had issues...

"You see." Seto explained. "We want to make him a peanut butter and jelly sandwich, but we don't know what ingredient to use!"

Anzu nodded. "Which of these ingredient should we use!" She pointed to Jelly, the Millennium Puzzle and a Celtic Guardian Card.

Yami gasped. "I don't know either! Ryou! Help!"

I sighed. I still couldn't figure out how these people managed to pay the rent. I pointed to the jelly.

"Say, you're right!" Seto grinned and then pointed to another group. "Which one?" There was a Joey Action Figure, BEWD poop and peanut butter.

"The peanut butter." I pointed and received more praise for my genius.

Anzu pointed to the last group. "This is the hardest of all!" Bread, Yugi's Hair Gel, and my skateboard. I blinked. When did my skateboard get here? Ah, ,well I just pointed to the bread and received praise. I would steal what was mine back later.

"That's right! Now we can make Mokuba some peanut butter and jelly sandwich!" Seto grinned. "Thanks so much Yami!"

My mouth hung open. But I did all of the work! How come he got praised? Ah well. I'll get them back for stealing my skateboard anyway. Yami motioned for me to follow him outside. I did so, reluctantly, looking around hastily for yet another clue. That way I'd get this done so much faster.

Ne, TBC!

Ending Notes: XD! Well... I typed much more than I thought.... so I guess that I'll just have to erm, continue this later!

Yugi Muse: Hah! Yami's acting like a dork!

Yami Muse: Shut up, shovel.

Yugi Muse: T.T

Erm... R&R? All flames will be used to torch my sister's YGO cards so they may never be used against me! MAHAHHAA! Mine are better anyway. XD