A/N - I am the worst at updating, i know, I'm gross. I can't even make excuses for this, ever since Beth died I've just had the worst writers block ever, I'm super sorry! However, summer is coming up so I will probably be writing a lot through then, as usual no promises, sorry! Also, just a quick note: There are fuck loads of loopholes in this, I'm a lazy writer, but goshbirdie did point out about the loophole with Phillip allowing an ambulance for Daryl but ignoring the gunshot wound and I just feel like Phillip has a lot of influence over the town and could dictate which people came out to help and who they helped, if that makes sense?

Anyway, this has been a long ass AN so I'll leave you to (hopefully) enjoy this chapter!

Dead. They were dead. Beth supposed she should feel something, anything, but no, nothing. Rick seemed a thousand miles from her, like a mirage in a desert that she would never reach and then everything came at once. Her heart constricted as though her veins and arteries had coiled themselves around it suffocatingly tight, making her sway and stumble as she tried to get closer to her home. Her head was filled with lightning bolts of white hot pain that seared her vision and made her eyes burn with tears and with one final stand of resistance she let out a screeching sob that burned her throat and rattled her teeth before she collapsed in a heap on the grass.

She found comfort in the grass, an odd thing considering everything she had ever known, loved or cared about had been so cruelly snatached away from her. The grass was cold, soothing against her scorching skin, but it was the memories that helped her. Making daisy chains with her mother before proudly presenting her father with a meticulously crafted daisy chain bracelet that Hershel had sworn he kept safe in a keepsafe box by his bedside. Beth thought of her brother who had taught her how to do cartwheels when she was seven, he had whooped and cheered as she landed ungracefully on her butt, but he was proud anyway.

Beth allowed herself to close her eyes for a few solitary seconds before she became aware of her chest heaving from her sobs and bile rose to the back of her throat. She barely had enough time to sit up and vomit on the grass beside her, before finally laying back in defeat and closing her eyes one last time.

When Beth woke again she found herself coiled up on a sofa that smelled musty, second hand and completely foreign to her own. With sleep ridden eyes she looked around her surroundings, before her blue orbs settled on an old an older woman with soft, kind eyes. Carol.

"Hey sweetheart …" Carol whispered and Beth discovered that she had been crying too, though her eyes were kind they were red rimmed and watery and then it all came crashing down again.

Carol knelt before Beth, stroking her hair as Beth wept with no noise apart from the sounds of her shallow intakes of breath that punctured the silence ever so often. She was too tired to fight Carol away from her, to insist she was fine on her own, to sit up and talk, to stop crying.

She couldn't stop fucking crying.

Her cheeks were soft from the tear tracks that seemed almost etched into her face now, she was vaguely aware of the pads of Carol's thumbs stroking away the tears from her face and before she knew it, Carol was lying beside her, cradling her as Beth allowed herself to unravel.

"How long…?" Beth croaked softly; her throat hoarse and aching. She was unaware of how long they had been laying there, pressed against one another for comfort.

"A week." Carol responded, sending shockwaves through her system. "You woke up a few times, but blacked out again … Some days it was like you were a zombie, eating because you had to, then you'd fall asleep and when you woke up … You couldn't remember even opening your eyes."

"Have I missed the-" Beth choked up again and willed herself to control her emotions for a few seconds so that she could talk, but it appeared to be a wasteful effort.

"No… We were determined to hold it when you knew what you were doing … Maggie hasn't been home, we can't get into contact with her." Carol swallowed slightly, not wanting to break the news to the blonde, but also finding it difficult to lie to her or even keep a secret, she'd been through too much.

A new pain formed in Beth's heart. It felt like there was a long, thick cord that was black and rotting that had formed around Beth's heart. One for her mother, one for her father, one for her brother and now one for her sister. The cords stopped her from moving, she felt suffocated by them, wanted to scream at them to go away, but if they did she'd have no link to her family; and then what would she be?

"Hurts …" Was all Beth could muster before realising there was another strand in her heart she had refused to discuss. "Daryl…?"

An overwhelming amount of guilt washed over her, making her stomach feel completely acidic with anxiety, she couldn't lose Daryl too. She had forgotten him … He was shot and she had forgotten him.

"He's fine … I promise. Merle's been taking care of him from what I assume … He's been round here every day, screaming bloody murder about seeing you, but we weren't allowed to let him in." Carol tried to explain in an even, calm voice, but Beth could hear the strain in her already cracking voice.

"Can I … see him?" Beth found it easier to speak with pauses, it helped her throat release, too many words made it feel tight, like her words blocked up her throat and made her drown.

"I'll give him a call."

Daryl was at the front door in less than an hour. He could barely walk and he was told that his wound was infected, but he hadn't seen a proper doctor until he knew Beth was okay in the circumstances.

As Carol opened the door he rushed through to the lounge and found her laying on the sofa, but she managed to sit up when she saw him. It looked to Daryl as though she had roots that tied her into lying against the cushions and she was beginning to tear herself free from them at his presence. A swarm of affection filled his heart when he saw her, how strong she was, how fragile and broken she seemed, but still fighting.

"Beth…" He breathed, before dropping to his knees in front of the blonde. His gut cursed him for it.

"Daryl…" She responded in the same tone, her voice barely a whisper, but he knew what she wanted.

He gently caressed her cheek with his thumb before lightly brushing his lips across hers. He needed her to know that he was here, he was okay, alive. Beth had gently returned his affection before leaning down to lean her forehead against his.

"They're gone, Daryl." She sighed against his lips.

"I know…" He stroked a greasy lock of hair before moving his lips to kiss her jaw softly. "I know…"