Maura Isles didn't grow up feeling as though she were truly a part of a family. She knew her adoptive mother and father loved her in their own ways, but she never knew what it was like to experience the unconditional love she doted onto her own children. She didn't grow up with uncles, aunties and cousins around her all the time. She never even knew what it was like to have a sleepover at a grandparent's house. Yet here she sat with her mother-in-law on one side of her with Harper in her lap, and her half-sister on her other side holding her little boy.

Jane was happily perched across the room on Tommy's lap with TJ cuddled up in her arms, the rest of the room filled with their family members. The hospital had decided to let Noah sleep in a proper bed with guard rails rather than in the crib he barely fit in, and everyone was taking their turns sitting on the bed playing with his toys with him.

"Are the doctors being nice?" Cailin asked as she pressed playful kisses to Noah's cheek, earning a gleeful squeal followed by a nod in response. The room was filled with nothing but love and laughter, a complete polar opposite to how the dining room felt last night. It surprised Maura how fast everyone was to ensure they could be here today. There was not one family member missing from this room.

"Have you still gotten to breastfeed him?" Angela asked curiously as she pulled Harper's hair up into a high bun on top of the little girls head. All the men in the room suddenly had something else to talk about, distracting themselves from talking about or looking at Maura's breasts. Jane rolled her eyes, sensing the change in the demeanour of her brother.

"Jane bottle fed him this morning because we have to be really aware of how much he's taking in because of the drugs." Maura told Angela who mindlessly nodded along with her.

"And this thing…" Cailin started, gently moving the tube coming out of the back of Noah's bandaged head so Maura could see what she was asking about.

"That's where they're administering the chemotherapy today." Maura responded, seemingly happy to answer any questions the family had about what was happening today.

"And we're allowed to stay while it happens?"

"He'll get sleepy and if he starts getting sick we'll probably ask you guys to leave, but yeah." Jane interjected as she made her way to the bed, handing TJ to Frankie before she sat down beside her wife, not hesitating to lean forward and press her lips against Maura's. There was no doubt she now had traces of red lipstick on her lips; it was worth it.

"Are you sure you want us here for his first dosage?" Angela asked, resting her chin on Harper's shoulder as she quietly spoke to both Maura and Jane. Suddenly Noah was holding one of his toy dinosaurs out toward his sister.

"Mommy." His voice silenced the room, everyone's eyes darting to the little boy who had just loudly and clearly said his first word. Maura swallowed hard as Harper took the toy from his hands and immediately placed it in her mouth.

"Did he just call her mommy?" Cailin asked with pursed lips, the look on her face hinting that she wanted to scream of excitement.

"Mommy." Noah said clearly again, reaching both of his arms out toward Maura. Without saying a word Maura lifted him off Cailin's lap and into her arms where he contently rested his head against her chest, his whole body relaxing.

"You are so incredible." Jane laughed as she placed a careful kiss to Noah's head. Cailin stood up and walked over to Hope, wrapping her arms around her mother's waist and resting her head on her chest much like Noah had just done to Maura.

"Mommy!" Harper whined suddenly, kicking and throwing her arms around when Maura didn't immediately pick her up.

"Mommy is having a cuddle with Noah, but Mama will hold you sweetheart." Maura cooed, running a hand across Harper's cheek as Jane reached out for her. The little girl frowned, pulling away from Jane and burying herself deeper in Angela's arms.

"I think we've been giving her too much attention." Maura pointed out, never having seen her daughter act so jealous of her brother before. A nurse came into the room, her eyes widening as she noted the numerous family members scattered all over the place.

"Someone has a few supporters!" The young woman noted sweetly, making her way directly to where Maura sat with Noah cradled comfortably in her arms. "Is everyone planning on staying today?"

"Is that okay?" Jane asked nervously, not wanting anything to remotely compromise their sons medical care. The nurse nodded slowly as she picked up Noah's clipboard, writing down notes before she gave Jane her full attention.

"Chemotherapy does lower your body's immune system so it's suggested anyone who's sick or who has been sick recently stays away until they are in tip top shape." The nurse informed Jane as her eye's darted around the room full of healthy adults. "And so long as both the other toddlers are fully immunised they're fine to stay too. Just be aware this won't be easy for poor little Noah." She pursed her lips apologetically before she left the room, everyone staring at the sleepy boy in Maura's arms.

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Jane and Maura had decided to ask everyone to leave, at least for Noah's first treatment. They needed to know what this was going to be like before they let anyone else experience it. Angela had offered to take Harper back to their house in order to keep her in some sort of normal routine. The blood tests had come back as perfect as they could have been and so the little boy's treatment was set to begin.

They had decided to start with Noah lying on Maura's lap, his head on her chest with his pacifier firmly in his mouth and Jane's index finger trapped in his hand. The doctor reminded them he would be right outside if they needed him, but that they should prepare for potential vomiting and a few painful tears. In retrospect; it was all normal.

"I feel so terrible about Harper." Maura admitted as she softly ran her hand up and down Noah's back in an effort to calm him as the drugs pumped into his system for the very first time. Jane nodded in agreement, biting her bottom lip as she tore her eyes away from Noah in order to look up at her wife.

"I've never seen her act that jealous before." Jane noted, remembering the way Harper had whined the second Maura's arms were wrapped around Noah rather than herself. Who would have thought such a short period of time experiencing what it would be like being an only child would affect her so strongly?

"Remind me that she won't remember this." Maura begged, earning an affectionate smile from Jane who skilfully pulled her chair closer to the bed with her foot so she could kiss Maura's hand.

"Honey by the time we get home tonight she won't remember." Jane playfully reminded her, earning a small giggle in response just as Noah began coughing. Without thinking Jane tugged the pacifier out of his mouth to ensure that if he did throw up, it came out. The doctor had given Maura a towel to place over her clothing, and as milk spilled out of her sons mouth and onto her chest, Maura was thankful.

"It's okay, sweetheart." Maura cooed quietly, folding the towel in half while continuing to rub his back in the most calming manner she possibly could. The doctor had decided they were going to do a week of chemo at a time, which meant either Maura or Jane would be here every day going through this. The thought suddenly made Maura's whole body feel exhausted.

"We'll take it in turns." Jane promised quietly, immediately noticing the worried expression that came across Maura's otherwise perfectly serene face. Maura gave her wife an affectionate smile. Jane Rizzoli always knew exactly what she needed.

Maura went back to softly running her hand up and down the little boys back, pressing gentle kisses to the top of his head while he loudly sucked on his pacifier. His eyes never left Janes.

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When both Maura and Jane returned home later that night, Harper was wide awake on the living room floor surrounded by books and toys. Angela innocently looked up at them, holding her hands up before her in surrender before they could chastise her for letting Harper stay awake.

"I put her to bed four times and she screamed bloody murder." Angela confessed, all three women looking down at the sleepy toddler who was fighting sleep. Maura let out a quiet sigh and handed her bag to Jane before making her way toward their daughter.

"Come here, honey." Maura cooed, lifting Harper into her arms and immediately making her way up to their master bedroom to help soothe the little girl and remind her that she was always their number one girl.

"How did it go?" Angela asked as she wrapped her arms around Jane's shoulders, the brunette not bothering to push her mother away, instead clinging on tightly and closing her eyes. Nothing in this world compared to a mothers hug, even at 38 years old.

"He threw up a few times and had a bit of a cry, but he's okay." Jane shrugged as she let go of her mother, rolling her tense shoulders while she placed Maura's handbag on the kitchen counter top. Jane felt as though she could sleep for days after tonight. "I'm worried about Maura."

"Come here." Angela suggested, sitting down on the sofa and patiently awaiting Jane to join her. Angela's hands automatically came to rest on her daughter's thigh.

"We've been together so long and been through so much, ma, and I can see she's in pain but she won't talk to me." Jane informed her mother quietly, looking down at her hands that were folded neatly in her lap awkwardly.

"She's upstairs right now trying to put your little angel to bed, sweetheart. Go cuddle up with your family. We all know what Maura is like; she won't talk until she's ready. She's not used to having people want to know if she's okay like you are." Jane nodded along to her mother's words. Mother's made everything better. Jane let out a loud sigh before snuggling herself up against Angela's side.

"I love you."

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Jane quietly opened their bedroom door, praying that if Maura had been able to get Harper to sleep that she wouldn't wake her up with her presence. The room was dark, the only light coming from the candles Maura had lit on either side of the bed.

"We're still awake." Maura whispered, Jane's heart skipping a beat at the relaxed tone of her wife's voice. The brunette crawled up the bed and slid in beside Harper who was happily cuddled up against Maura breastfeeding.

"How's she doing?" Jane asked, propping herself up on one of her arms as she softly ran a hand up and down the little girls clothed back. Maura nodded, a small smile playing on her lips. That was good enough for Jane Rizzoli.

"How are you?" Maura asked, her eyes seeming to struggle to stay open as she reached across their little girl to rest her hand on Jane's hipbone. It never ceased to amaze Jane that even after all this time, one touch from Maura and everything felt completely okay again.

"I'm sad, but I'm okay." Jane responded truthfully, forcing a smile as she removed her hand from Harper's back and placed it over her wife's. "Do you want to talk about today?"

"What about today?" Maura asked innocently. No matter how much time passed or how many times Jane and her family proved they were around for the long hall, Maura constantly was forgetting that she was no longer alone in the world. People cared about her, and it was hard for her to get used and accept that fact.

"Our little boy started chemotherapy." Jane stated blankly, her comment lingering in the silence that followed. Maura took a deep breath before she found her voice again.

"I am terrified, all the time. I'm scared that we're putting Harper through the benign neglect I was subjected to as a child, and I'm scared that I won't be able to hold it together for Noah." Maura spoke quickly, her eyes leaving Jane's to rest on the toddler in her arms.

"It's okay to be scared, sweetheart." Jane reminded her gently, trying to keep the sympathetic look she knew Maura hated off of her face. "I'm scared too, but you have to start talking to me." Maura nodded, knowing everything Jane was telling her was true.

"I will, I promise. I sometimes… I don't want to be a bad parent." The words broke Jane's heart, her eyes closing as she tried to comprehend that Maura genuinely thought she could ever be anything other than amazing to their babies.

"That will never happen. You are such an incredible mother, Maura Isles."

"Rizzoli." Maura teased, moving her leg so she could gently kick Jane, earning a quiet chuckle from the dark haired detective. "I love you." The smile's completely disappeared from both of their faces as they lay staring at one another; the look they shared in that moment saying more than any words ever could.

"I love you so much."

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I have had the most incredible influx of support over the past 24 hours. I've received messages from 12 different people and so many other kind words expressed via the review section.

You are all incredible, encouraging, kind people. Thank you for the motivation I needed to get through this chapter. You're all the reason I plan on never letting anyone's negative opinion stopping me again. Thank you.