I actually wrote this story quite a while ago, and it was supposed to be published for last year's Demyx Day, but I didn't like it, so I ignored it for a while. After giving it another chance, however, I thought there might be some way I could salvage it, so I decided to do some hardcore editing and publish it anyway. It's pretty corny, but I think it'll provide you with a few chuckles. Or giggles. Or however you like your laughs.

Anyway, the characters, locations, etc. are property of Square Enix, but I suppose you could possibly say I own Mr. Scales. Not that I care to. My own popeyed goldfish, Peepers, will feel betrayed otherwise.

Mr. Scales: A Moist Tragedy

Another routine mission to Twilight Town (a place that always seemed to be in a perpetual state of sunset, causing Demyx to wonder not only how this was, but why it was even called Twilight Town to begin with when it never seemed to actually reach twilight) resulted in the young Nobody visiting the local pet store. Well, to be perfectly honest, the pet store in no way had anything whatsoever to do with his mission, the objective of which he had already forgotten, while the reminder he had scribbled down on a note card was just that, scribbled and effectively unreadable even to him. But, he had always possessed quite a fondness for animals, and Saix expected him gone for at least another hour, so he had some time to kill.

As Demyx strolled down the various aisles, he found himself, at last, in his favorite corner of the store, the fish section. For whatever reason, it seemed like most people found fish to be boring, perhaps the most boring of all the animals, but he thought it was really the bugs and the reptiles that were, in actuality, the worst kind of pet because they were totally gross. And fish were not gross. They came in all kinds of colors and had goofy faces and floated about lazily in their tanks, something Demyx would rather like to do himself (get to swim day in and day out, not be trapped in a tank). But, never did the young Nobody actually buy one of these fish, as it was strictly forbidden for a member of Organization XIII to keep a pet, and seeing as this particular member was already on Number VII's bad side for not completing his missions and for the poor state of his reports (no way was he doing homework anymore), a third strike against him may not be a very good idea.

However, just like his current mission objective, this was all but forgotten when he spotted the prettiest, cutest fish he had ever seen. It had a big, flowing tail and bugged-out eyes, and he fell in love with it right then and there. (And since, like all Nobodies, he lacked a heart, this only showed all the more the degree to which he was smitten with that fish, that he adored it so even without a heart.) A popeyed goldfish, the little sign beneath the tank said. And he would make it his popeyed goldfish. He dug out what little munny he had in his pockets (along with some lint and a paperclip he hadn't even known was there) and bought the lovely, little fish and all the things that went along with such a pet.

Afterwards, he left the store, a very happy emotionless Nobody indeed, and found an inconspicuous place, at least, the most inconspicuous this particular Nobody was willing to put the effort into locating, to open a portal and return to his room, where his pet would hopefully be safe from Saix (and Xigbar, as well, who was known to drown goldfish, which in no way was going to happen to Demyx's goldfish, no siree).

His pet now in its new home, he sat nearby (its bowl had to be placed on the floor, as his room was strangely devoid of furniture, aside from his bed, and his bed was for him, not his fish), and he gazed at it as it floated from place to place, so peaceful, and he thought of how nice life as a fish would be (again, not in a tank, though). There was no doubt that this was the greatest fish to have ever existed in any world ever. Or to be more exact, it was surely the greatest fish to have ever exited and been owned by someone that didn't exist himself. Yes, that was most definitely true.

But, something was missing. This most fantastic of fish needed a name. All pets needed names. All animals did, really, as he had named the pair of pigeons that had lived outside his house back when he was still Dyme a very fitting Margaret and McFeathers. But, this most fantastic of fish to have ever existed and been owned by a nonexistent Nobody needed a name even better than what his two pigeon neighbors had, as it was a truly fantastic fish indeed, and so he got to thinking. Fish Sticks? No. Baron Bubbles? No, not that, either. Mr. Scales? Yes, that would work. He nodded. That was indeed a great name for a great fish.

It wasn't until some time had passed, a time filled with the young Nobody serenading his new buddy with his sitar, munching on graham crackers, or napping, with a little bit of report-writing crammed in (with an emphasis on "little bit"), most of which consisted of made-up details he hoped would satisfy Saix (not that anything could satisfy that grump), that Demyx realized something. You had to take care of your pets, didn't you? Sure, he could handle feeding Mr. Scales, but he remembered now that the lady at the store had said that he also needed to clean the bowl. But, the bowl was filled with water. How do you clean water? With a fish in it? Now that would take some maneuvering. What if Mr. Scales got mad?

A week went by, this fact a nagging thought in the back of his mind. How was he supposed to do this, and why did taking care of a pet involve so much work? It wasn't a whole lot of work taking care of himself. Finally, on a day where a particularly unpleasant mission was assigned to him, one that took place in Agrabah, a world that was hot and dry and ugly and would most definitely make Demyx sweat, which was just too gross, the Nobody once again had some time to kill. Perhaps this was a fine time to see to cleaning Mr. Scales' bowl.

With a grand display of sneaking and sidling about between his room, the kitchen, and, finally, the nearest bathroom, Demyx eventually had everything he needed for this dreaded task. Mr. Scales, of course. A net. And a pitcher. He rolled his sleeves up and got to work, as unpleasant an event as he had expected, thus the word "work". Work indeed.

Catching Mr. Scales to transfer it to the pitcher, now filled with water, was a simple enough thing, but washing the bowl was quite another. This was a much nastier task (how could a fish make things so dirty?), and some of the little, multi-colored rocks fell down the drain, which he was pretty sure was bad, but no one had to know, and he got water absolutely everywhere, and nothing against Mr. Scales or anything, but fish water was not a thing he wanted all over the place where he brushed his teeth, not after finding out how absolutely filthy the tiny creature could be. Finally, the busiest day he had suffered through in quite some time was over, and Mr. Scales was safely back in his bowl and in the young Nobody's room. And Demyx began to wonder, how long did fish live, and how many more times was he expected to put himself through that?

Demyx was forced to endure this most unpleasant of chores several more times over the next few months, and it began to dawn on him that, as fantastic and wonderful as Mr. Scales was, he was a most demanding pet. And it was one afternoon, or whatever time it was supposed to be in the ever-nocturnal World That Never Was, that Demyx sat in his room, pondering over the inconsistencies of having a fish that must indeed love him, but at the same time, could ask for so much from him.

These thoughts were interrupted by the sound of knocking. His back stiffened, and he turned from where he sat on the bed to look towards the door with wide eyes. Mr. Scales was in danger, and demanding or no, Demyx would not let any harm befall his friend. At least, as long as whoever was on the other side of the door was not too forceful.

"I know you're in there," the voice said. "You're supposed to be out on a mission, which could only mean you're hiding in your room."

It was Xigbar, the goldfish-drowner! Demyx dropped to the floor before the fish bowl, fear apparent in Mr. Scales' blank eyes. Demyx was a Nobody. He knew fear in an expressionless face when he saw it. He grasped the bowl in both hands and bid his friend to stay completely and utterly silent, then slid the bowl under his bed, always the most secure place to hide things you didn't want others to see. Demyx sprung to his feet as the door opened to find Xigbar standing there with a smirk on his face.

"Hey, I could've been getting changed!" Demyx said.

"Changed into what?" Xigbar asked. Demyx looked down at his coat, then up again. Well, just because Nobodies wore the same thing all the time, that didn't mean…

The man strolled into the room as the door slid closed behind him "Okay, so what are you hidin'?"

"What? N-nothing." He clasped his hands together, only to shove them into his pockets when they fidgeted too much. Stay cool, Demyx! You, too, Mr. Scales!

"You're the worst liar I've ever seen. You'd think a Nobody would be better at that sort of thing." Xigbar stopped on the other side of Demyx's bed and watched him with an eye that always seemed to know everything, while Demyx fought the urge to grab Mr. Scales and make a run for it. Don't drown Mr. Scales! We have a bond!

Xigbar took a moment to study the other Nobody's face, no doubt anything but "cool" at this point, not helped by the fact that he was now biting his lower lip. Seeing that Demyx wasn't talking, the man continued, "Every week or so, I keep finding a trail of water droplets all between the bathroom and your room," he made a sweeping motion with one arm, "not to mention you now look ready to wet yourself, so fess up."

Darn it, Demyx! You left a trail of guilt leading right to you! Now Mr. Scales is going to drown, and it's all your fault! The smile on Xigbar's face widened as Demyx's mind raced over how he might yet save his aquatic friend.

The pressure began to be too much, however, and Demyx threw his head back, the very picture of desperation. "Don't drown Mr. Scales, Xigbar! I'll never forgive you if you do!" Well, he'd probably get over it eventually, considering Xigbar was his best friend (even above Mr. Scales), but he could certainly pout for a few days if it came down to it. And Demyx could be an obnoxious pouter.

"Wait a minute, who am I drowning?"

Darn it again, Demyx! "No one!"

Xigbar sniggered. "Who's this 'Mr. Scales'? You got yourself some kind of a pet or something?"

Demyx shook his head in a way that really only served to tell the other man quite the opposite of what he intended. "No."

As if in some way gaining the ability to read the younger Nobody's thoughts, Xigbar glanced down at the underside of the bed, and so did Demyx, his eyes growing wide. Number IX dropped to the floor, arms reaching for his pet, but there was a bending of space, and he found himself facing the door. He jumped to his feet, twirling about as he did so, to find Xigbar standing where he had just been, holding the fish bowl out in front of him with a big grin on his face.

"Oh, so this is Mr. Scales? He looks a lot like you."

With a wail, Demyx lunged at the man, only to land on his bed, while Xigbar pulled the fish bowl to his chest and stepped back. "No, put him down, Xigbar!" Despite the volume of his protests, however, the younger Nobody made no move to pursue the other man further and simply laid on his stomach with his arms stretched out and hanging over the side of the bed.

"I'm not gonna drown your stupid goldfish, kid!" He held the fishbowl up to eye level. "But, you do know we're not supposed to have pets, doncha?"

The younger Nobody pushed himself up to a sitting position. "You're not gonna tell on me, are you, Xigbar?"

"As if! What do I care if you have a pet? That's moon-boy's rule, not mine. What are you gonna do if he finds out about it, though?" He cocked his head to the side. "On second thought, what do you think Saix'll do if he finds out?"

Demyx didn't much want to think about that and stretched out his arms. "Give him back, okay?" Xigbar held the bowl out, and Demyx snatched it away and hugged it close to him. "What would Saix do?"

The man shrugged and gave a very unhelpful, "Dunno."

The younger Nobody went back to chewing his lower lip. Not only was Mr. Scales in potential peril, but… He looked down at the fish, no doubt appreciating the affection its owner was currently affording it, even if it didn't show it. Demyx knew these things. He returned his gaze to Xigbar. "It would be better if Mr. Scales was free, right?"

"Sure, maybe. But, how come you're givin' in so easily?"

A smile formed on his face. "Mr. Scales is a lot of work."

Xigbar snorted as he slapped a hand to his face. "I shoulda known it would be somethin' like that! So you gonna let it go, then?"

Demyx returned to gazing down at his pet, a look of understanding apparent in its bulging eyes, even if there was absolutely no sign of it. "I may have to." He nodded. It had to be done. For Mr. Scales' sake. And because Demyx didn't want to have to wash that stupid bowl anymore. But, mostly for Mr. Scales. "I know just the place."

The two of them stood on the beach not far from Twilight Town, still with its usual pre-twilight sky. Demyx loved the beach, about as much as he loved Mr. Scales, and the beach of the world where they met was the most fitting. They watched the waves lap on the shore, and Demyx took a deep breath. He held the bowl out in front of him, sadness hidden, unseen, behind Mr. Scales' eyes, but it was going to be just as hard on him as it would be for his fish. More so for him, really, as he was its mommy (guys could be mommies, too), and he had raised it for, well, a good couple of months now.

"I'll miss you, Mr. Scales. We had great times together, and you were a great listener, and…" He glanced up at Xigbar. "Can I have some privacy?"

Xigbar raised an eyebrow. "With a fish? As if. Would you finish up already?"

Demyx frowned at him. This was a touching moment, and he was ruining it! He returned his attention to Mr. Scales, no judgment in its eyes. "I…" He looked at Xigbar, then, back at the fish, before finishing with a hurried, "I love you," and receiving a snort from Xigbar in response.

The Nobody began to stride forward, the waves eventually rushing up to meet his boots. This was it. "Good bye." He stared at the waves and the endless expanse of ocean. It was such a big place for such a little fish. Perhaps…

"Just do it!"

Demyx glared back at the other man, and then, closing his eyes, he tipped the bowl upside down. I'll miss you, Mr. Scales! Remember me! He forced his eyes open at last, finding the bowl empty, Mr. Scales no doubt heading off in that magnificent expanse of sea, to look for others to call family. He truly was a fantastic fish. He turned, head bowed, and returned to Xigbar.

"He's gone now."

"Yep."

Demyx looked up and sniffed. "You think he'll remember me?"

"Sure he will." There was a pause, the waves and the gulls the only sound, as Xigbar crossed his arms and tucked a fist beneath his chin. "You know, goldfish are fresh water fish, aren't they?"

Demyx gasped and clutched his hair in both hands. Mr. Scales…! No… "Why…why didn't you tell me before?"

"Sorry. Guess I forgot."

The man grinned before disappearing, leaving Demyx alone on the beach and alone to thoughts that were enough to disturb a Nobody, and they certainly did indeed. He looked over his shoulder at the sea and then down at the empty bowl in his hands, and he dropped it as if it contained poison before creating his own portal to return home. Demyx, he thought to himself, you're a really lousy pet owner.

Yeah, so that's the story. I know it's silly (and I feel guilty about the fate of Mr. Scales), but there you have it. It was at least a rather amusing read, I hope, and in case you didn't know, that thing about Xigbar drowning goldfish is from a quote in "358/2 Days". For a while, I just thought people were being goofy (well, not Goofy, but you know…), then, I realized it's a real thing from one of the games. Oh, Xiggy, you're so funny. Please review, okay?