Playlist:
"Midnight City"- M83
"Low"- Cracker
"Come Undone"- Duran Duran
"Hey Jealousy"- Gin Blossoms

Dear Jasmine,

Forgive me, my writing kinda sucks. I mean, like it really sucks. I haven't written a letter to anyone by hand since a pen pal project in Grade Four. And I was only allowed to do half of the writing, because I had to share my pen pal with Amy.

There's so much I need to tell you. But... It's hard. It's hard for me to talk.

First of all, I'm sorry. I'm sorry I cheated and got you into the lies I was telling. I'm sorry you had to cover up for me. I owe a lot to you for that.

Actually, I owe you for much more than that. I owe you for being there when no one else was. When no one knew the truth about Amy and I. You've been a great, fantastic, amazing friend, definitely one of... no... the best friend I've ever had.

Ugh, that sounds kinda corny, doesn't it? I suck at this.

You deserve so much better than me. All I ever do is screw things up. Even when I get something right, no one ever pays attention until my sister swipes the credit away from me.

Being with you and away from her taught me quite a bit about independence, respect and self-esteem. But, being separated from you and getting stuck next to my twin again has taught me a lot, too. This whole experience has opened my eyes and helped me see in a neutral light the person I really am.

I've found that I can be as low, scummy, and detrimental to the people around me as Amy. I've at last realized why I hate myself so much.

But I don't wanna be those things! I want to be strong and fair and ethical like you. Words can't describe how much I admire you, Jas. You're just the best.

And sometimes I wished we could have been more than friends, y'know? Like, maybe we could have been something. If... maybe I had been worthy.

But I'm not.

I've never told Amy that I'm... like this. She uses every little flaw I have to humiliate me and rub her dominance and egotistical superiority in everyone's faces, especially mine.

The only thing I can take comfort in knowing now is the fact that she is a grosser pile of garbage than me, because I know you must hate me by now.

Um, sorry. I just spilled a blob of ink on the paper.

I understand i you never want to see me again. I understand if you would rather be with Shawn than me (though I'm not sure what on earth you see in him...), and I understand if I don't hear back from you after you read this. I was only a burden to you in the competition, and I'm not about to keep that going now and distract you.

All I want is for you to know that I love you. I really do. I can only hope that I'll become a better person in time, and make a connection with a girl like you somewhere in the distant future.

Not that there will ever anyone just like you.

But, it's not like I can hit reset button or anything. It's just something else I've learned, even if it is kinda sad.

Of course, sad is okay sometimes, right?

-Sammy

Two days later...

Dear Sammy,

I've got quite a bit I need to tell you, too.

First of all, your writing does not suck. It's cute. I could definitely hear you reciting the letter you wrote me in my head as I read it. I'm not much of a writer myself, but I can pull together a decent letter when the need arises. And there was certainly a need to respond to yours.

I tell you, I'm not sure the place is at all what it seems. It's a strange island, like it's alive or something and it needs to keep rearranging itself. Weird, huh?

Oh jeez, here I am going on about this ridiculous island when I should be making a proper rebuttal to your apologies.

Please don't be sorry, Sammy. You were never a burden to me, not once. I wanted to see you thrive without that horrible little tick ruffling your fur. I can't tell you how proud I was when you tricked Chris into blasting Amy instead of you. It's good to know you took my advice to heart. Not many people do that, they're all scared.

And that's another thing. You were there for me, too.

I'm not sure you've noticed, but I have a tough time making friends as well. Just about everyone I know thinks of me as some Amazonian freak with a short temper.

But even after I flipped out at the end of the Doom Balloons challenge, you didn't turn your tail and run, you stuck by my side. Only a handful of people I have ever known have been that true to their words of friendship.

In no way should you hate yourself, Cutie, we're all low and scummy people at some point in our lives, especially us adolescents. But we've got our whole lives ahead of us! If you really don't want to be like your sister, you've got all the time in the world to change. You can become exactly who you want to be, it just takes time.

And if you don't want Amy to be a part of that future, then she doesn't have to hear a word about your orientation.

Not to make you feel obsolete or anything, but you aren't the first person to come out to me. My third cousin actually came out to me about a year ago, and my study buddy a few years before that. As for me, I'm not really sure at this point. I've liked guys, but I've been into a few girls before, too. Like I said, I'm only an adolescent, so it could be a while before I'm certain.

But could we have been something?

Not sure what to say about that...

Shawn's okay, I guess. But he's nowhere near as clean or mature or sensitive as you. I don't usually go for sweet white girls, but I was thinking of making an exception for you.

Though I can't really see how we can talk this out until we're face-to-face again. I'm so sorry. Really, I am.

I promise, I'll try to win the million, for the both of us. I look forward to hearing back from you soon, cutie.

Love you too,
Jasmine

I don't think I will continue this, but it was fun to write. I adore Jasammy. Don't forget to review!
-Bucky