Vigil

They say that the castle walls see everything.

I have been standing for a long, long time. How fitting that I am nearly the sole witness to what happens within my corridors. I know what horror is had within my walls, I know what dalliances are had beneath my roof. I have seen joy and death, sorrow and birth. I am the one who witnesses all that goes unwitnessed. I am the one who bears the secrets with a lead tongue, unwilling to speak because it is not my right to do so. The men and women beneath my roof are my children; I let them roam according to their own plans, but offer them sanctuary when all else is lost.

I have seen many a battle, and I have seen many a king. Never has there been a king more covert than Uther Pendragon himself. I am intimately familiar with him, as half the kingdom seems to think it is as well. I have seen him in the loving arms of the women he once loved. I have seen him holding his newborn, with such love and tenderness in his eyes. I have been the one to hear him crying out in his sleep from nightmares. I have felt the wear under my marble feet as he paced the floor on a tireless night.

It is not proper for a parent to favour her young, so I will not. Uther Pendragon has made good decisions, and bad ones, as all in life must.

Along the same thread, Uther Pendragon has faced death and found himself conquered, as all men will eventually do. I am sorry for the loss, for one of my own has died. He was courageous and he was strong-willed, with a heart that tried to see good even if became blind to certain evils.

Arthur mourns his father. Tonight, he is the lost, weeping boy who has lost his father - the one person on his earth that he truly believed in. Tomorrow, he shall be the king.

Cold stone against a numb body is hardly the most comforting of touches, but it is all I can provide beneath the knees of the young boy as he kneels next to his father. He experiences no shame as the tears roll down his cheeks, for this was not only his king, but his father. He mourns for the loss of family, for the loss of a role model, and, maybe in a part of himself that he does not allow to surface, he mourns the loss of his innocence. From this day forth, there will be far greater a weight on his broad shoulders.

But he will not be alone.

Arthur Pendragon is never alone. From the moment that I welcomed the young brunette warlock into my arms, I knew that the future king would never be alone. That was a great comfort to me and I do not fail to trust my intuition, especially now.

Arthur does not know it, but the great wooden doors separating him and the stairwell also separate his grief with another's. Merlin is still young, but I often wonder if he does not possess more knowledge than the rest of us. If nothing else than that, he possesses the loyalty, the courage, and the willingness to do what others will not.

So, despite that Merlin is only Arthur's servant - although he will now be the serving boy of a king - he does not leave Arthur's side. He is not by him in body, but in mind and spirit, and Arthur will leave his father's side come first light to find the warlock dutifully waiting. Hardened by a thought-guilty conscience, grief, and loss, but waiting nonetheless.

I do believe that Merlin will always wait for Arthur. No matter the time, no matter the place, I can rest without worry for my young king. His servant will always be there to slot the pieces back into place, behind the scenes or to his face.

It is comforting to know that my child has such a good friend.

I can rest easy, for I believe that Camelot will once again become the shadow of the great kingdom it once was. Wracked by grief and torment now, it will one day shine again, beaming brilliantly like a beacon over the vast, blue ocean. King Arthur will be the one to lead us to the dawn of that new day, and Merlin will never fail to be by his side.

They say that the castle walls see everything.

One sometimes wonders if they can see the future, too.

I wanted to try with a different POV because I love this type of writing and I was really struck with this scene in S4... So yeah.

Please do NOT post spoilers for S4 onwards if you leave a review. I'm not finished with the series! :)
I do not own Merlin. Thanks for reading!