Hey :) By come-back plan has been postponed and even more postponed, until last Saturday when I had my birthday I unwrapped a printed version of Scars Beneath the Surface (courtesy of my phenomenal boyfriend) and I realized how much I'd truly miss updating… And there's no time, but there's never gonna be time, time has to be made :P

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Words, we have thousands of them, carefully selected phrases to fit every situation. We are 'so happy for our friends' or 'very sorry for their loss'. Sometimes those words are moving, often however they are superficial, having lost their true emotional value like a rock loses its sharp edges wave after wave. Yet no matter how impossible the situation, there's always a giftcard in your local supermarket that applies, until there isn't…

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Ô ma douce souffrance

Pourquoi s'acharner tu recommences

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"I'm pregnant.
And it's yours."

A heavy silence stretched across the room.

I'm pregnant. And it's yours.

A shiver went down Damon's spine and he blinked, twice.

I'm pregnant. And it's yours.

Damon's head appeared to have a life of its own, slowly beginning a shaking motion while attempting to process the news. His mind suddenly reactivated and ordered complete stillness, sensing that a non-verbal 'nooooo' was not going to be of help at all. In search of a better approach, his head remained tilted, frozen mid-motion. How in God's name was he supposed to respond?

Two dark blue eyes disappeared and reappeared once more as Damon blinked again. Think! He wanted to hit himself against his thick skull, scrambled for a plan, still he came up blank. Earlier in the day, when he had watched Shireen Baratheon being burned at the scene in Game of Thrones, the word 'perplex' had come to mind, yet now he realized he could have a thousand more insane episodes, yet never feel this way again, red weddings included.

I'm pregnant. And it's yours.

Her words, they'd been… In a way they'd been like lightening up close. The most magnificent and powerful thing one had ever experienced, yet wildly dangerous and potentially lethal. How was he doing? Was he effectively ruining all chances he'd ever had with her? Was the end near?

Deadly, lighting could be deadly. One had to be on alert, anticipate, respond. Damon opened his mouth but no words came out.

Elena.

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Et dans le bruit, je cours et j'ai peur

Est ce mon tour ?

Vient la douleur

xXx

Elena began to move against the chest where she was being cradled. She had to get away, to run, anywhere, nowhere. Her fingers were spread and pushing against Damon's chest right now. She eyed him wearily and he looked odd. His head was tilted to her left, his lips apart, eyes wide. As Elena tried to move away from the frozen body beneath her, the blue eyed man suddenly came to life.

The hand she'd been pushing against his chest was cradled in his hand now and he locked her arm in place with his other hand, he wasn't letting her run and she grew slightly uncomfortable. Was he that unhappy with the news? Did he want her to abort, did he want her to keep it? Was he angry with her? Was he in shock? Elena's mind was running a short circuit, no certainties remained. The only thing she still remembered was that she didn't want him touching her if his arms held no comfort.

"Damon, say something," she rushed out in a whisper, unable to refrain.

"It's… a lot," Damon tested his first coherent sentence.

It wasn't enough. Not enough to made her feel less ashamed, or lonely, perhaps just frightened. She attempted to turn away, hurt, but he wouldn't let her. Of course he wouldn't. She had to stay, if only one sound thought remained clear in the whirlwind that was running havoc on Damon's mind, it was the fact that he couldn't let her leave.

"No," she faced away, she cursed herself, yet she did face away. How many times had she seen or read this scene… The girl in distress, gradually distancing herself from a man who's desperately screwing up. 'Don't leave' – 'then fight for me'. It was the cliché of all clichés, the one she'd mocked and joked about endlessly with her friends. Still right in that moment she saw no other way, so she faced away and prayed like hell he'd fight…

Elena was still lost in thoughts when she felt his grip on her loosen and his fingers trailing across her cheeks, cradling her face. For a brief moment she considered breaking away, but who was the act for, she wanted him to win.

And he did win. Because as he tilted her chin to meet his eyes, she saw the dark pupils and his bright blue irises, saw the lake she'd just rippled. Only then it dawned on her, how throwing a rock in the water didn't leave a single circle, it left a thousand. Their eyes connected and as she stared into the blue depths, she felt what he felt. It wasn't about 'wanting a baby or not', is was about finding the money, getting a degree, getting a job, looking for a place to raise the child, defining their relationship-status, considering marriage or co-parenting, alerting their parents, altering their live.

Her rock had left an endless collection of circles, rippling the water that had been still for as long as she could remember, until the water overflowed and the first drop fell from his eyes. So Damon Salvatore was capable of shedding a tear, who knew.

She saw his gaze drop to her hands and his fingers trailed down along her arms to hold her hand. She allowed him to intertwine their fingers and the next Damon knew, Elena lifted their hands and turned underneath them, effectively ending up pressed against his chest. It was like a silent dance, in the middle of the night. The intense push and pull from before now made room for a more gentle rhythm. Damon was happy to have her close, have her skin touching his skin, her heartbeat near his. Meanwhile Elena dared to let the news sink in for the first time since she'd found out that afternoon. She still didn't know what to do or how to handle it, but she did know where to run, deep down she'd always known where to run, for there was no safer place then Damon's embrace.

"It's a lot," she whispered softly, repeating the words Damon had spoken before.

"It's ours," Damon whispered back, kissing her skin softly, just once.

Elena turned around in his arms, facing him. His eyes followed her, searched for hers, and finally answered the questions she'd been frightened to ask. It wasn't everything, but it was a lot. And it was enough, enough to face tomorrow.

xXx

Words, we have thousands of them, carefully selected phrases to fit every situation. Still, every once in a while, words are overrated, for nothing can capture warmth and security quite like genuine embraces can…

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Que d'espérance

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Truth be told, the next chapter of a Wonderful Lie is written and ready, but it felt weird to post. I have no clue how much/if views/reviews dropped after Nina leaving the show etc… And I've been gone half a year. So this is me dipping my toes into the water :P And if it works out, consider me back :)

Night-night dear readers!