6.

(Authors Note: I am so grateful for everyone who has supported me and my story. I am so sorry for not updating it, and I blame my depression. It has never been my intention to quit this story and my plans are to put serious time and effort into it this summer when I won't be as stressed out as I am now. Thanks for the patience and the support, you guys make me so happy and so eager to continue this story. My love to all of you! 3 )

"What are you looking at, Eren?" Levi sipped at his tea. They had a late breakfast at 8 am this morning because of a reschedule in Levis working shifts, that meant that Eren should be awake enough to make conversation but all he did was stare out the window. Maybe Eren was worried about the meeting with Erwin they were planning, maybe it was the whole amputation thing that made his mind wander… Of course, he could be looking at a funny dog on the street for all Levi knew.

"Oh…" Eren looked up slightly startled before shrugging and pouring himself more milk. "Nothing… were you talking about anything just now?"

Levi raised an eyebrow and sat up a bit to lean towards the window. Outside small birds were making their nests or gathering food for their youngsters, some of the streetcars where in traffic… then Levi realised what Eren had been looking at.

"Ah… they'll be late for school." He mused. The children running past their house and along the road had heavy backpacks and lunches in brown paper bags. "Heh, they must have missed their streetcar."

"Yeah…" Erens voice was glum and he pushed a piece of omelette into his mouth. He chewed slower and slower as he got lost in thought again.

"Hm…" Levi had been hesitant to bring the subject up but he might as well. It was one of the many things Eren would need to face someday and Levi was doing him no good trying to shelter him like this. "Aren't you almost seven years old now?"

Eren nodded. "Yeah… why?"

Levi was quiet for a while before answering. "That means you should go to school soon." Of course Eren wouldn't want to go to a place with other children, healthy children, and their fearful parents. He had had enough of that, had suffered all too much of it.

It was silent again except for Erens slow chewing and he took his time before he swallowed. "I guess…you can't home-school me…? Or something like that."

"No." Levi had though about it too but it was a very bad idea. "Without my salary right now we can't pay for your treatments…and I really am no teacher… Not with the things that you should learn at school. Heh, I hardly could read before I was a teenager."

Levi hadn't been a dumb kid, or had had any learning disabilities. There was simply never an opportunity to go to school and learn things with his background. When he finally taught himself how to read it had been because of the titanium and the boredom he suffered from locking himself up in his apartment. After a while the newspapers had looked interesting enough.

"But… I really don't want to…Is there no special school for kids like me?" Erens eyes briefly widened with hope but when Levi sighed and shook his head the hope was quick to leave him.

"There is, but it's too expensive." The teacup had gotten cold and Levi refilled the electric water boiler before clicking it on. He still had time before he had to go to work, he could pour himself another cup. "We can't afford it with your hospital bills and the apartment rent." Sometimes Levi wondered if Eren wouldn't have been better off with two parents instead of only Levi as a caretaker. Sometimes he wondered if Eren hadn't been better off at the orphanage Levi never left him at.

No, he wouldn't have been. Who would have adopted him? A child suffering titanium would never had been chosen amongst the healthy and pretty looking. Levi might not be the best parent material there was but he was sure Eren was better off with him than he would have been if Levi had left him with the other orphans.

When Eren had been silent for too long, Levi decided to try to be a bit inspirational. Maybe that would be what Eren needed. "You know Eren… if you go to school without showing uneasiness or acting like you don't belong there, you would be a pretty big inspiration for anyone else suffering the disease. You could show them that it's okay and that you won't be held down because of it. How does that sound?"

For a few seconds Erens eyes shone. Levi knew what the boy was like, he wanted the world to be free and open again. Eren wanted everyone to be free and to not be kept in their houses because of fear. But then Eren simply shook his shoulders and sighed. He sounded all too much like an old man, Levi thought.

"I… I would want to show them that… but what do I do when they start screaming at me? Or throw stones… or get their parents to come and save them from me?" Eren looked out the window for a while before he turned to Levi. "I just don't want to go to school if I have to go through that everyday!"

Levi sipped at his tea to give himself a moment to think. It was true of course. Eren had been through it far too many times to believe any lie Levi would tell about how good it would be. How different it would be to go to school. Why the children there would be different from the ones in the park.

"I wont pretend that that's not a possibility. But you have to remember that we don't actually know what will happen. Maybe the school environment can be a bit different when they are under teachers surveillance? We don't know that." Levi glanced at the clock on the wall and finished the tea quickly so he could put the cup in the sink. "

I won't force you to go to school but remember that I can't be your teacher and without education you'll have a rough life ahead of you."

"I don't already?" It was unusual of Eren to use that kind of tone against Levi and Levi almost reprimanded him for it, he didn't have time to do it though. He pulled on his jacket and boots.

"Well, if you don't fight for yourself… who's going to?" Levi put the milk and butter back in the refrigerator and ruffled Erens hair before he left. He hoped Eren wouldn't sit there moping for too long.