(A/N): The honest-to-god ending to Destiny is here! Now with 100% less Dinkelage!

There isn't really much to say now, beyond my wishing that somebody out there enjoyed this fic! While I did have a bit of a low point with Chapter 2 in my personal view, 3 and 4 felt much more fun to write.

Oh, and we're still in bold! I'm BOLD like that!

... Let's just finish up here ._.

WARNING: Spelling errors, language, awkwardness, pathetic attempts at comedy and bizarre attempts at being edgy and original despite stating in the A/N of the first chapter that I was ripping off an episode of a popular British TV Show!

Chapter Four: Farewells in Order

If there was one constant in the universe for the duo of adventurers, it was that the journey rarely beat the destination. It was a fact that Wonders lamented with a crude approximation of a frown as he stumbled through the tumbling green meadows of Skyrim; with a strange, alien and dangerous murderer to his left - and a pretty little succubi to his right.

The gate had certainly seen the wear and tear of two hundred years of abuse, no doubt being the home of bandits or the pissing ground of wolves for decades on end. It was strange how the vegetation of the dales almost seemed to circle the inactive portal into Oblivion, as if making peace with it and bowing to the mercy of the hellish realm beyond.

Wonders doubled his pace and overtook his deadweight companions, skipping over stepping stones and closing the distance. "Easy." he smirked to Stradlater, who grudgingly assisted the frail succubi across the growing and gruelling incline.

Awkwardly he stood back as the Argonian began to walk circles around the foreign structure, occasionally crouching to fiddle with some rocks only to look up to the skies and repeat his brief patrol. Destiny wordlessly settled on a slight bump in the ground, taking the weight off her legs. With a dull thump Wonders swung a grumpy kick at the gate, yet to no avail. "… Is this how you get these gates open?" Stradlater asked the daedra, nodding at the bewildering magician.

Destiny merely shook her head, sinking against her awaiting palms. "I-I hope not…"

After a brief moment of consideration Stradlater left the young Bosmeri, hopping across the rocky outcrop and making his way for his reptilian acquaintance. He raised an eyebrow as Wonders hissed ferally, squeezing his aching toes between his fists after a rather hefty looking punt. "Do you actually know what you're doing?"

In the Redguard's presence he practically recovered in an instant, fumbling for his belt and unstrapping the pommel of the dangling Tatermasher. With a sudden display of bloodlust he bonked the ebon frame of the portal with a hefty swing, producing a chorus of dull thumps and clangs as it bounced back. Eventually he relented, "Oh yes." he confirmed snarkily, bouncing the head of his mace against his open palm. "I'm hitting an Oblivion gate with a collection of dull objects. Come here, I could use your skull."

Charming. Mature.

Snickering dryly, Stradlater let his eye stare through the pair of pillars that formed the gate. He'd never really seen Daedric architecture in person; he hadn't realised just how stupid it looked. It seemed like the sort of thing you'd see in a teenage boy's doodle book alongside diary entries about how nobody understood him. The nomad's lip flinched in thought and fatigue. "How did you open it in the past?"

"I didn't." Wonders replied matter of factly, continuing to beat a rhythm against his rough scales with the crusty and crunchy bludgeon of his weapon. The shaft met the pin of his belt, alongside the sleeping bees that sat nestled within his satchel. "I just hung about the area, and sometimes it would open up and spit out a few carcasses." he sighed, rubbing his boot across a scorch mark on the floor. No doubt one of the corpses had landed there once, ripe for the picking of his greedy talons. "It looked like a phlegmy Nord clearing his throat. Certainly sounded like it."

Stradlater had a limited understanding of magic – and certainly a limited patience about it. "Incantations?" he pressed, his hands waving about in the sort of way a poor performer would act out an angry person. "Anything?"

Something offended him within the last two words that had just been spouted, for he snarled as if slighted by the towering warrior. "Something tells me that you don't quite get what sort of mage I am, Redguard." he berated, shuffling close and patting his shoulder condescendingly. "I'm the explodey type." he revealed, prompting Stradlater to roll his eye. Wonders stepped past him and stood to face the dormant portal, folding his arms stubbornly. "We wait."

The desert wanderer paused in thought, the constant beat of Wonder's tapping toes gradually growing with frustration. Eventually he stood before him, trying to catch the Argonian's gaze and attention. "… Thanks for going along with this." Stradlater said genuinely, suddenly becoming a lot more conscious about the positioning of his hands. Wonders' stare didn't falter, and after a few seconds he merely side stepped and continued to focus on the lifeless structure. The Redguard began again, "Look, I know you don't agree with me here, and that you're probably angrier than a vampire without any virgins on his beck and call, but…" Stradlater was cut off by the mage's sudden change of expression, his eyes adopting less of a childish anger about them and more of an unbending and shattering dread. Wonder's jaw hung open as if he'd just caught sight of a woman covered in melted cheese. "… What did I say?"

His gob still wide enough for his plaque to be clear, Wonders grasped onto the hefty man's shoulders and spun him around to spot what he was looking at. It was strange that he hadn't notice it before, but he'd definitely spotted it now. Stradlater rose his arms defensively, autonomously stepping back.

The gate had opened

Through the portal could be seen the belly of the beast, its roaring maw bright with fury and desire and life of its own. The might of the daedric magicks tugged at the surrounding trees and grass, sending ripples and waves through all the clothing and hair it could find in the area. As if enticed Destiny rose from her seat, drawn to the emotional plight of the gate. "F-Father can feel us." she exhaled in awe, the burning light of the gateway twinkling within her Bosmeri eyes. She rested her hands upon her bouncing chest, looking to the heavens devotedly. "He can show us the way home." the Argonian succubi smiled, feeling serenity in every vessel and bone her body fostered.

Wonder's tail strayed dangerously close to the shins of the Redguard's legs, but he wasn't going to stop him – he was just as terrified as the magician, having suddenly been thrown into such a breathtaking spectacle. "Can you get through?" he shouted over the racket, his raised voice barely audible above the portal's wrath. It sounded less phlegmy, and more bloody. "Is it safe?"

Destiny eagerly turned to them with excitement filling her cheeks, unaffected by the force that was causing the pair of men to brace against the storm – they were certainly losing manliness points by the second as they grasped onto eachother's shoulders for support. "Father… W-Won't hurt friends." she reassured, almost sounding as if she was speaking to Bal himself. The winds steadied and calmed, easing their heedless assault. "The gate is harmless. You're completely safe."

Exchanging looks, the duo separated within an instant under a chorus of awkward coughs and nervous chuckles. "So much for making an impression." Wonders grumbled, tugging at the peak of his hood bashfully. After a moment of self-reflection and reassurance of his sexual preference, the Argonian glanced at the succubi – eager to get it over with. "So you'll go now? Return to Oblivion?"

She nodded. "We will." Destiny wriggled her snout, her eyes scanning the greenery that Tamriel had to offer. The trees and flowers of Skyrim certainly became a lot more interesting when you realised that you might never see them again. She scrunched her toes, gazing at the watchful moon as it gave way to the grace of the sun. "… We will miss this place." Destiny exhaled forlornly, amazed by the myriad of colours and tones seizing her senses. "Its rushing water, its fluffy clouds…"

The Argonian snickered demeaningly, following her gaze and watching the skies as its white mist drifted elegantly. His grin reluctantly faltered in admiration; he'd never really thought about such things before. "Ignoring the populace, the weather, the predators and the stink?" he said, before turning to meet her. "… Yeah, it starts to grow on you doesn't it?"

They shared a smile of understanding, the shadows of the valley shrinking as the day began to grow. Destiny glanced at Stradlater expecting the very same expression to fill his lips, yet was disappointed to find nothing of the sort. He looked uncomfortable, his eye downcast and his body withdrawn. She frowned, clutching onto the cloak that he had gifted her merely hours before. "You wanted to kill us." she noted quietly, glaring at Wonders.

That wasn't an accusation.

Blinking with shock, the magician's heart skipped at least four beats. How on Nirn did she know that? "Did I now?" he stalled bluntly, stammering for some sort of response to save his worthless hide. It was certainly the worst time of any to come to the realisation that you were standing in front of a god-made killing machine – one that likely had ways of reading thoughts in order to do what it did.

Ah.

Now, that put the pieces together.

Pathetically he turned to Stradlater for support, before bowing his head in acceptance of his fate. "Well… Needs must? W-What's done is done?"

Charitable grace flourished within Destiny, as the serenity that she'd had mere moments before returned in due time, as if it'd just needed a moment to recharge and regenerate. She could understand his plight; and his motives. "You wanted to protect yourself, and your friend."

Wonders groggily regained his composure, taking a moment to confirm without a doubt that he wasn't going to die within the next few minutes. "... Myself, he'd just be a bonus." he grinned, his return of character prompting Stradlater to roll his eye as if reading from a pantomime script. Wonders snickered at his expected response, hooking his thumbs under his leather belt. "I'm a charitable git, aren't I?"

Succubi or not, she really knew how to give the sweetest of smiles. Her head tilted analytically, her slight nostrils flaring cutely. "Saxhleel wisdom, huh handsome?" the beauty recalled, pacing forward. "You may have a harsh and proud exterior, but deep down…" her rough palm met the fabric of his front, which she gently brushed and patted with affection. "You're a man with a heart of gold."

The mage stared at her strangely for quite some time, almost appearing insecure in her words - as if she knew more of him than most; even himself. After a moment's pause he rose his chin proudly, his scrawny chest remaining true and defiant. "… More like a muddy silver if you ask me."

Do as you wish.

But none can define me.

Destiny's hand timidly granted him relief from her touch, her fingers sliding across his shoulders as she at last backed away – understanding and apologetic of the uneasiness she had caused him. Her hands felt cold and forlorn without the male Argonian in their grasp, as if like her mind and heart even her body didn't want to say goodbye. Once more she turned to Stradlater, who stared back.

There was no compassion in his eye.

Only regret.

While his expression was calm - if not stoic in its firmness – she could sense the feeling of hurt and betrayal he was experiencing in her presence. Destiny sighed weakly with guilt, curtseying clumsily with pinched fingers. "Sir…" she bowed, the gurgling might of the Oblivion gate growling impatiently. Stradlater watched on as she stepped away, the daedric powers emanating from the portal reaching out to grasp her like a wave of caressing hands at a famous bard's performance. Within moments she was bathed in this magic, drawing closer and closer to the glimmering light.

Stradlater flinched with uncertainty, unable to tear his gaze from the daedra as her dainty Bosmer form was stripped dry of its facade. In direct contrast Wonders kept his distance, watching on at a safe vicinity from his colleague. One final whirl punctuated the end of the process, and the flesh and fabric vanished to at last reveal the truth - exposed, at last, in its entirety.

Destiny, the Daedra Riel.

Wonders shuddered at the sight of her. She almost seemed to resemble the Flame Atronachs used by cowardly summoners as distractions and bodyguards, albeit less flamey and more meaty. "By the Hist…" the lizard murmured in awe, stepping forward and nudging Stradlater's shoulder encouragingly. "… All yours."

"You…" she spoke, her voice a divine echo crossing a thousand individuals in unison. It would've been a terrifying effect, yet through the legion of voices all the Redguard could pick out was the familiar Bosmeri – at last confident in her speech like a young ballet dancer finding her feet. "You too are a man of wisdom, and kindness." Destiny's ascended eyes looked downwards, her form lifted a clear foot from the earth. "… Yet you never wished us harm."

Strangely he found it far much easier to speak to the succubi now that she had revealed her true appearance, no longer hiding the truth behind a veil that he lusted for. "… There's no point in taking lives without reason." he said, his white and lifeless eye glistening wetly under the furious glow of the gate. It pained him to know that his home of Hammerfell had been bred from so much bloodshed – civil strife and conflict over the simplest of matters. Even still the Aldmeri Dominion banged at the gates of his city. It seemed people would never learn to leave eachother in peace, so long as there was something out there to whine about. "It's something my people have yet to learn to its fullest."

Destiny tilted her head girlishly; as she had so many times before as a short, familiar, and innocent Bosmeri. "His highness thinks the same... In his own way." she chimed, something akin to a sly grin growing where her lips apparently were. "Every peoples has its outsiders." she reminded, "Its own… Prodigies."

Wonders gestured to himself smugly, swinging on his heels. "Hear that?" he called to Stradlater, fixing his collar with a fidget. "Someone called me a prodigy!"

Every part of him expected the Redguard to say "That makes two of you" or make some other snarky response that would put him down, yet surprisingly he was wrong. In fact, nothing happened. Stradlater and the daedra merely continued their eternal staring contest, basking in the sight of one-another like a pair of virgins just before hitting the springs. Wonders grimaced with concern, watching on.

The Daedra Riel took a moment to drift elegantly to the ground, forming into a confident stride with total smoothness – as if being outside of her mimicking shell had left her free and in full confidence with the control of her body. She stood up to the towering Stradlater – almost his height herself – and suddenly caressed the uncomfortable and depressed looking man with her rough, skeletal palms. They were inhumanely warm, yet not uncomfortably so; as if he was sitting alongside a warm spit during a lovely night, breathing in the fresh smell of the desert sands.

It was a lovely feeling, truly.

Even through her daedric visage, the concern of her expression was as clear day itself. "We are sorry for what we have put you through." she apologised, understanding the feelings of confusion and betrayal that the scarred man must have been experiencing. Out of nowhere the succubi lent him a kiss, softly smooching him with her own bizarre taste. Stradlater stumbled with confusion as she pulled away an instant later, a sheepish and humane giggle erupting from Destiny as if she were a cheeky teenage girl. Wonders merely wretched ickily, his eyes squinting in a mix of horror, humour, and curiosity. "Men enjoy kisses… Don't they?"

Stradlater flushed red weirdly, the effect of her affectionate gesture seeming to set his mind at ease. With the same poise and sophistication as before the daedra began to float back, finally allowing herself to be claimed by the scorching realm she called home. The charmed Stradlater regained himself, watching on with parted lips as the young Bosmeri woman he knew as Destiny was bathed in light. He murmured lowly, "… Goodbye Destiny."

In an instant the scene returned to business, as a resonating call like the horn of a thousand marching armies howled from within the gateway – one last cry from the express carriage to Oblivion. "Thank you, on the behalf of Molag Bal." she acknowledged formally, praising her saviours one final time until suddenly her body vanished. There was no fading effect or miraculous burst befitting of glory – she merely blinked out of existence and made her exit. Her fading voice spoke back affectionately, almost sounding tearful as it turned into nothing but withered dust and soundless echoes.

"Goodbye… Sir."

Taking that as her final words, the portal at last began to fizzle closed like the belch of a frost troll who'd been feasting on stolen mammoth cheese. Squeezing shut the light faded climatically, the gusts and winds that Destiny had pacified at last granting release to Stradlater's and Wonder's lapping and flapping clothing. Within seconds it was as if the gate had never even been there, a peculiar silence filling the region as if the two had fallen completely deaf.

That brief silence became a prolonged one as the bewildered pair began to consider and process what they'd just witnessed within the last few minutes. A daedric succubi had just been given freedom to return to her home through a dormant Oblivion gate that had been jump started by several bashes of a mace and a couple of hefty kicks from someone's foot, having stolen a quick snog from a sweaty Ra Gardan and an even quicker feel of the chest of a snarky Argonian before she departed for the firey realm beyond. Wonders had certainly seen his fair share of what Tamriel had to offer over the years, but he couldn't rightfully say that he'd experienced that set of events in one moment before.

Stradlater sunk to his knees heavily, the chirping birds of the local forest canopy chatting with confusion and intrigue at the racket that they'd all just heard. The burly Redguard keeled over, his large hands clutching onto the blades of grass that covered the land in its jagged form. After a dramatic pause, Stradlater - against all expectations - began to spit and sputter, hacking in disgust at what he'd just experienced. "T-The taste!" he grunted, dribbling profusely in perpetual agony. The nomad choked on his spittle for a moment, before returning to his childish whining. "Dear... Urgh!"

So much for a touching moment.

Drawing his walking stick cum skeleton arm, Wonders prodded his chin in thought with the pointy tip of the bandit's thumb. Moving forward in complete ignorance to the suffering of his grounded companion beside him , his thoughts began to wander on what had just unfolded before their eyes.

If Destiny's actions were truly beyond her control and existed purely to invoke lust and love from people in every single situation, why had she suddenly asked them for their help in returning home? It wasn't too farfetched a theory, but perhaps her begging and pitiful display was meant to make people feel sympathy for her - and in some cases, attracted to her - in order for her to get her own way?

In some ways it had certainly worked for her, what with her irresistible charms having pulled Stradlater in like a Talos shrine in the middle of Solitude. How else could the Redguard have been perfectly fine with a rotting demon - who'd probably snogged countless obese noblemen and elderly traders with bleeding gums - shoving her tongue down his throat and having a nice ol' swirl?

Or maybe she just had free will.

And Stradlater had strange tastes in women.

That was easier to settle on, really.

The creaking thumb-joint continued to tap at his chin as Stradlater recovered, hauling himself upon wobbling knees as he wiped his slobbery lips clean. Exhaling with relief he yanked the dead arm from Wonder's grasp like a toddler in the playpen. "Oi!" Wonders snarled, watching as the dazed warrior pulled himself up with the tip of the limb. The Argonian's nostrils flickered with uncertainty, "... Well?"

Stradlater continued to focus on his breathing, as if he'd just finished a forty mile marathon only to be told that he'd been disqualified for a failed start and that it'd all been pointless. "Let's just get back to the chest." he settled on, staring through the lifeless Oblivion gate to spot the image of the rising sun. No matter how far from Hammerfell he was, that familiar light would always be there for him. "... And then go home." he settled, eager to swish down a couple of pints of mead to settle his tastebuds. He could tell that Wonders was in the mood to share some "complex" ideas and theories to fuel his ever-growing ego, but he was in no state to delve into the depths of philosophy. "As far as Whiterun goes, this never happened."

Wonders may've not been a qualified cleric - or his mother - but Stradlater genuinely looked exhausted, the combination of fatigue and the turn of events that had just transpired no doubt taking a toll on the scarred man's hefty resolve. It just didn't make sense - weren't snogs meant to be invigorating? He'd read "The Lusty Argonian Maid" enough to say that, that was for certain. Wonders looked over the detached arm that Stradlater clung onto, observing him as he tried to move his pained self. "… Need a hand?"

That was sickening.

Obscene.

Wonders pursed his snout in self-contempt, disgusted that a man of his calibre had the guile and guts to say such a bland line with a straight face. Stradlater winced with recoil, balling up a swab of spittle and firing it at the muddied ground one more time before sizing up the Argonian with a spiteful glare. He tossed the arm back to his colleague, who fumbled for it clumsily. The Redguard beckoned to him apathetically, steadily leading the way to home. "... I hate you."

X

(A/N): IT ONLY TOOK FIVE MONTHS CHAPS, BUT WE GOT THERE IN THE END

All in all, I must say that I was quite disappointed in how this story turned out. I was really hoping to be able to explore the concept of Destiny deeply, what with the episode of Red Dwarf the concept is based on spending so little time on the idea of a shape-shifting pleasure beast!

Still, I felt it did start to pick up in the end. I'm feeling like I'm securing fixed personalities with Wonders and Stradlater as time goes on, and hopefully - hopefully - they'll become a lot more defined as they interact with more characters!

Thank you very much for reading, and for those who want another fix of Stradlater and the gang to not fear!: More will soon come!