Memories to Treasure

I don't own detective conan or any of the characters.

Saturday 10:30pm

My heart races as I hold the reel pictures close to my heart. Today has been too perfect to be real. I pinch myself hard and it hurts, I guess it has been real. My brain races through all of today's events not willing a single memory slip by. The way his touch feels, the way his laugh sounds, the way his eyes shine. In one day, he recovered what I've lost a long time ago, my smile.

Three days earlier

Wednesday 2:00 pm

"Oi guys we need more fire wood" shouted Kudo over to the kids.

"We'll go gather some more Conan-kun" responded Ayumi happily as the three children started running towards the woods. "Be careful and don't be long" yelled Hakase after them.

"Man those kids got a lot of energy" muttered Kudo to himself.

"Unlike another kid I know who sits on his ass all day waiting for someone to die" I replied coldly.

"Shut up and I'm not a kid"

"You look like one to me"

"Yea well whose fault is that" I heard him mumble.

"Where is Hakase?" he asked me looking around for the old man. "He went back to the station we passed a few miles back to get more ingredients". We sat in silence, I turned my gaze to the scenery enjoying the shining of the lake and holiness of the mountains, a cold winter breeze hit my face bringing me back to life. I looked over to him and he appeared to be doing the same. I started thinking about the concept of our insane relationship when he turned to me "do you have more of the temporary antidote?"

I looked over to him studying his face "depends". He waited for me to continue "why do you ask?"

He took a deep breath and then slowly exhaled "I was thinking a need a day off you know"

"You going to risk your life just to have a day off with your girlfriend?"

Ignoring my last comment he asked "how many do you have?"

"How many do you need?" I responded a little irritated. "A couple" he said I responded with a questionable look and waited for him to explain.

He said nothing for a whole minute but locked his gaze with mine. "I was thinking we could spend a day together you know as our true selves". It took me some time to grasp the concept of his idea "funny", was all I said.

"I'm serious Haibara, I need a day off okay, I need a day where I don't have to lie or pretend a day where I can just be myself and not worry about hiding my identity". I started but he held a finger to silence me then continued.

"And I know you do too okay, last time we came face to face with them in that train it was close, too close and I just keep thinking that the way things are going either one of us could die any day now and I refuse to die before even getting to know you, my partner the real you. I have lived my whole life without any regrets and I'm not gonna start now and neither should you so please would you do this for me?"

I froze right there on the spot not being able to move, not being able to stand straight. So many thoughts and emotions racing through my head. It seemed impossible to talk or to even think. I tried to lift my head up, to hold his stare. His oceanic blue eyes, clear as crystal, sharp as a razor tore through my soul and now it was too impossible to think. "It's dangerous" the words came out of my mouth no louder than a whisper, he heard it though.

"It's mid-winter" he began a hint of excitement in his voice "a scarf, a jacket and a beanie and no one would be able to recognize you besides I'll be there to protect you like I promised, you'll be safe-"

"It's not me that I'm worried about Kudo it's you" I burst out shouting not able to control the swarm of emotions travelling through me.

He took a step back surprised of my outburst, his eyes never leaving mine for a moment.

Hakase came running towards us holding two bags filled with what looked like ingredients, apparently I yelled louder than I thought "what's wrong" he asks "nothing" Kudo replied quickly still locking his gaze on mine with a little smile dancing on his lips. Hakase looked between us, I could feel the weight of the atmosphere between Kudo and I and so could Hakase. He wanted to say something but then he seems to have thought better of it and eventually just walks away leaving Kudo and I on our own again.

"I'll be fine" he finally states.

"How could you possibly know that" I hate it when he gets on my nerves.

"I'm careful and so are you" he replied coolly. I said nothing back, I had nothing to say the words dried out in my throat and so the next few minutes passed in complete silence. He watched me through out those passing seconds, I know that because I can feel the heat of his stare burning through me even after I could hold our staring contest no longer. He took is as sign of agreement, giving me a small smile he started to walk away when I said.

"Are you sure you want to waste an antidote on me" and I'm tearing up. The atmosphere that was staring to get lighter is heavy all over again. My tone is full of humiliation and I know it. I finally look over to him and his eyes are wide in shock. Half walking half jogging he came face to face me and laid both hands on my shoulders and squeezed "I'm not wasting anything" anger apparent in his voice "if that's how you view yourself then this is the best chance to change that. Give me the chance to show you how beautiful life can be and that no matter who you are you are never a waste of space. One day where we can tell each other things we normally wouldn't, do things we normally wouldn't and just be honest with each other" his hold softens "I don't want you to think about how dangerous it could be and just answer for yourself, do you wanna spend a day together with me or not?"

"Okay I mean y-yes" I answer him and at that he smiles at me and then starts walking away this time not stopping. I sat down in the cold grass wondering whether I made the right choice and soon sunk deep into my thoughts sitting for how long I never knew. A soft voice brought me back to life, the sound of Ayumi happily calling for me.

Saturday 9:00 am

I guess I overslept a little. The sun shone bright hot and red, its sunrays spread all over the room across the floor and upon the wall. Struggling, I get to my feet and start walking towards the door. The door creeks open and I can hear him in the kitchen talking to Hakase, today was the day and the scenarios that have travelled around my head are endless. They pretty much covered everything from death to the most romantic day possible, I still don't know which I'd prefer.

A quick shower and I was in the kitchen reaching for the coffee mug. "Morning" he greets me, I nod in return. Nothing was said the whole times during breakfast. I could see the anxiety on Hakase's face as he shifts his eyes between us. He was against the idea at first, probably too dangerous for his liking though Kudo had managed to convince him somehow. Even though he was opposed to the idea, he was the one who got me my adult clothes and his taste in fashion wasn't even half bad. As I started walking back to my room I could feel his hand on my shoulder, Kudo's hand that is.

"Promise me something" he began "promise me that you won't hold back today that you'll try to live every second to the fullest, that you will try to have fun". I kept his gaze for a few seconds then turned my back on him and started to walk away "I'm going to get the temporary antidote, then we can go have some fun" I said with a smirk and I could almost hear the grin appearing on his face.

Agonizing, it is the only way to describe it. The rapid growth of bones, the immediate expansion of limbs. It only takes half a minute but even when it's over the pain takes it's time making sure to cover every inch of your body. Getting to my feet I started covering myself with layers of clothing. Underwear, a pair of tight black jeans, a plain black tank top. Tying up my red converses both my brown leather jacket and scarlet red scarf in hand I walk out of the room.

He was sitting in the couch with his back facing me, as the door closed behind me he slowly turned his head towards me, he sprang to his feet jaw slightly dropped. I turn away from him trying to hide the little red sprinkled all over my cheeks. I hate it when that happens. He walks over to me, he's wearing a pair of dark blue jeans a red button up shirt under a grey jumper. He extends his hand to me, I was looking at his suspiciously when he explained

"It's our first time meeting remember, Kudo Shinichi pleasure meeting you" it was, I have seen him before as Kudo he saw me as Miyano at that train incident but Kudo and Miyano never truly met so I slap his hand away

"When are we leaving?" I asked

"How about now" he replies.

I pulled my jacket on, wrapped the scarf around my neck "where is the beanie?"

"What?"

"The beanie you said you had one over at your house" I reminded him

"Oh yea" digging into his back pocket he pulled out a red beanie matching the color of my scarf, I guess it could be called pretty. "It's ugly" I say "well I'm sorry" he replied not sounding sorry at all. Pulling my hair back the beanie went on. "Shall we?" he says holding the door.

10:45 am

"I was thinking we could go see the match later on Spirits are playing Big you know I already have the tickets" he said with the familiar grin on his face.

"If you want to witness your team destroyed by mine then I'm all for it" I replied.

We were walking down a long narrow pathway alongside the river. The heat of the sun dissolved in the cold air but its light shone ever so brightly. It snowed last night and now the little snow left glows on the roof of the trees as it loses its form battling with the sunlight.

I turned my attention to the river, it seems to reflect the sunlight twice as hard. I follow the path of the reflected rays and they land on his face. I couldn't help but smile at his shining eyes, he was radiating peace and warmth as he walked.

"What are you smiling at?" he asks me.

"You look good, you look happy" I told him my eyes on his, we've stopped walking now.

He smiles at me "I am happy, I'm exactly where I want to be, exactly where I'm supposed to be actually and nothing has ever felt this right" he turned his eyes away from me and into the shining river. "As for my looks you don't have to sound too surprised" he says smirking at me.

He's playing with me and I love it "I just never thought you could put on a matching shirt and jeans without help" I said smirking back.

"Maybe I did" he laughs.

We spent the rest of the walk in silence, not awkward or anything instead it was quite enjoyable. I woke up worried about what might happen today and how careful I should be but the day just started and so did my happiness, I could feel my smile itching its way slowly to my face.

We reached a small coffee shop fifteen minutes later. His favorite drink was a latte apparently. I was sipping into my coffee when a though occurred to me "aren't you worried somebody is gonna recognize you?"

"Like who?" he replied without much attention.

"I don't know maybe your girlfriend?"

"Ran isn't here she went up with her old man to some spa in the mountains somewhere, so did that Sonoko" he explained.

"Oh"

We sat in silence for a while before a piercing scream was heard as the man on the booth across from where we were sitting collapsed to the floor, dead. It took him a good couple of hours to finally unravel the mystery behind the case. I guess you could say I helped out a little, pointing out small details that turned out to be quite helpful to him. Asking the inspector not to mention our involvement in the case we walked out of the café.

"That took you long enough" I said

"It was pretty tough though with so little clues. Anyway what's the time?"

"It's almost 1:30 now"

"Damn it we are going to be late the match starts in an hour" he starts sprinting away and now I'm running after him and he's too fast for me to catch up. He stops, jogs back to me and then carries me on his back as he begins to run off into the city.

We got there 45 minutes later, the train ride was okay at best. Supporters were getting on at every station at one point we had to squeeze together into one seat, maybe it wasn't so bad when I think about it. We got to our seats just as the teams were emerging into the field.

"No hard feelings right" he says still smiling.

"I could say the same to you I know how you turn into a baby whenever you don't get what you want" came my reply.

"You say baby, I say that's just my pride" he snickered.

"You wanna bet?" I proposed.

"I never knew you were the gambling type"

"It's not gambling if you know you're going to win"

"Alright you are on, when the Spirits win you will do my first grade homework for two weeks". I hate first grade homework, having to study first grade again is hard enough but with homework it's just painful.

"Alright" I said "but win the Spirits lose you will carry my bag to and from school for month"

He says nothing for a while, elementary school bags are heavier than they look. "Fine but that's never gonna happen"

"We'll see" I say as we shake hands bringing the bet to life.

The match was pretty exciting, shot here and shot there, the cheering never stopped everyone around us was on their feet the entire time. Towards the end of the first half though there was cross and a header and a goal. I could feel him jumping up and down next to me, I didn't dare look at him.

"Regretting the bet right about now aren't you" he laughs

"Nope" I was nervous though the first half ended and he said he'd get us drinks so I just prayed that we win in my seat as I waited for the game to resume. When it finally did the atmosphere was just as intense as it was on the first half, fifteen minutes left to the game and the net finally receives the ball. I sprang to my feet he sank to his seat and the game went on. Five minutes on and Big score again, I didn't even realize I was doing it but apparently I was. I was laughing harder than I ever have my whole life. I didn't realize I was doing it until I turned to him, shock, surprise and disbelief can all be seen on his face.

"You're laughing, you're happy" his eyes full of what seemed like joy.

"I am, I've never been happier"

It could have been called a moment if the crowd hadn't got to their feet screaming in joy. The equalizer, it was all even. I looked back to him, he was screaming along with everyone else and I couldn't help but smile. As the referee blew the final whistle he turned his eyes to me, I did the same.

"I can deal with a draw" I said

"Yea me too"

Suddenly I didn't care about the game or the result because win, lose or draw nothing was going to steal that feeling of happiness away from me.

5:00 pm

The walk back from the game was a quite a nice experience. We had to stay close most of the time, people were scattering out of every exit and people kept pushing us closer into each other, at one point we had to hold hands for a while.

We were waking back to Tokyo tower. The sun was setting, disappearing under the distant waters and mountains. Everything seemed so small from up here, parks, cars, buildings all covered in thick orange. I spaced out for a while as everything seemed to shine with beauty that I have never appreciated before. I hoped against hope that this moment would last forever, that everything will remain beautiful and that the world will always maintain the peace of this moment.

I don't know how long I spaced out but when the cold winter air hit my face and I came back to my senses, I realized that the sun is now gone and so is all the warmth and beauty. The little orange left in the sky was racing away leaving the sky dark and gloomy as it strips away the hope of love and peace from my heart.

He was my only hope, my only source of light left in this world. I turn to him, he seems to have been watching me the whole time. I had nothing to say to him, I lean my back to the rail, my back to the view. I could feel his eyes burning their way into the side of my head.

"What" I blurted out begging to ease the tension between us. We were all alone now.

"Tell me" he said taking a step closer "tell me what you're feeling don't hide your feelings from me you trust me right" his voice was low and yet so clear.

"It has nothing do with trust Kudo, there is no one that I trust more than you"

"Well why then" I could see the frustration on his face

"Because I don't think you want to know" I told him.

"I do!" he replies.

For the first time I consider telling him, my mouth hangs open as I try to make my decision when he speaks "look I know I'm probably not the best when it comes to feelings and emotion but it's frustrating to see everyone around laughing but you and I know that you have a good reason to be sad but I want you to look at the brighter side of life I want you to smile more and hell laugh like you did today, your laugh is beautiful" he smiles at me "I don't know how you feel, how could I but that doesn't mean that I don't understand that its difficult, I want to share your grief so that maybe one day we can share our happiness, I want you to be happy Haibara".

"Why" was all I could say as I got lost in his gaze.

"Honestly, I have no idea" he says as he exhales loudly.

"You thought today would make me happy?" I asked.

"Was I wrong?" worried look on his face.

"No" I told him before he was even finished with his sentence. He waited for me to continue "Kudo do you know what my only goal in life is right now?" the question caught him off guard and eventually he just shakes his head.

I turned my face away from him "my one wish in life is for you to be happy and that requires the antidote. I must get you the antidote I must right what I have done wrong" he says nothing so I went on "I trust you more than anyone and because of that I have opened up to you more than I have to anyone including my sister but the thing is everyone that I have over opened up to is dead" I can feel the tears forming around my eyes "my mom, my dad, my sister everyone whose ever given a damn about me is gone and I just keep thinking that if something were to happen to you-" the flow of words stopped. I couldn't go on the thought of it was impossibly painful "I would rather it be me than you" was the last thing that came out of my mouth for a long time.

Not much was said after that, I spent the next five minutes or it could have been five days in his arms. With my head resting on his shoulder. My arms wrapped tightly around his back. I could feel his heartbeat against mine, the warmth and comfort were undeniable. I slowly pulled away too embarrassed to live in his embrace any longer. The corner of his shirt was wet with my tears, perfect.

I looked up to his eyes and tried to apologize but never got the chance as he gently placed a finger on my lips "you know what I know the best Italian restaurant in the city" he says smiling. "Well I am kind of hungry" I say the most genuine smile on my face.

Arm in arm as walked out of the tower, so many unsaid things yet so perfectly understood. As we walked out I knew full well that the best day in my life had just gotten better.

6:30 pm

It's a long walk from the tower to the restaurant, apparently the best Italian place had to be an hour away. Instead of taking the train or the bus, we decided that we would walk there and have the chance to talk more openly as we have been doing all day.

"You have to make me a promise" I stated.

"I don't have to do anything" he replied.

"Yes you do I'm doing this for you, I never wanted to do this in the first place and it been really boring but I didn't say anything because I was worried that you might cry or something so I just went with it" I teased him.

"Well aren't you sweet, but unfortunately for you I happen to know better"

"What's that supposed to mean" I said as I tried keep a straight face, he can't possibly know he is too dim.

"Well I believe that you wanted this ever since I asked you, you were reluctant because of how much you worry about things but deep inside" he stops walking and turns to me "you wanted this more than anything besides you're having the time of your life"

"Don't flatter yourself" I retorted, well he's half right.

"So what is it you want me to promise you?" he asked.

"To never talk about this day ever again" I said.

"Why?"

"Because it would make things more complicated than they already are and there would be tension between us so whatever you want to ask or talk about just do it today okay"

"I still don't get it but fine, I do have a question though" his eyes tell me that he is serious and I can feel the little ball climbing up my throat "do you or did you ever love to do something girlish you know like play princess or dream about unicorns or something"

"Don't be ridiculous" I start walking again as I laugh to myself "and unicorns are real" I say as I turn to smile at him.

We've been walking for half an hour now. As I pull out my phone to look at the time I can hear the sound of his footsteps fade. I look back and he is frozen in his spot gazing somewhere to his right. I sigh and walk back to him.

"No way" I hear him mutter.

"What the hell are you looking a-" he wraps his fingers around my wrist and pulls me behind him as he starts running into the center of the park. The number of people around us started to increase as we got closer to the center. He stops running after a while "I knew it" he says. "You knew what?" as soon as I asked I got the answer, ahead of me is an open ice skating rink. I turn my head to him.

"No" I say.

"Yes" he says.

"No"

"Yes!"

"Kud-" he pulls me after him and I'm running again he stops in front of a man who seems to be selling tickets. There is a little shop set up next to the rink for lending out skating equipment. I watch him as he sits down on the little chair tying up his skates. I look down at my pair of skates, they seem new, I'm stalling for time and I know it and so does he. "Just put them on already!" he exclaimed.

I put them on. I don't understand why I'm so nervous, I haven't skated before and I have never been too keen on snow and ice. The main reason though is the people out in the rink, while walking to the shop I noticed that most of the people skating were pretty good and most of them were clearly 'together'. I don't usually care what people think of me but today was special and it has been perfect and I didn't want to be the one to ruin that.

"You ready?" he asks. I nod in return.

As we make our way into the rink I try to walk as naturally as I could. He opens the little gate for me and waits for me to step inside. I hesitate as I place one foot in, I'm gripping the railing as hard as I can and the other foot slowly steps in. I'm standing still as a statue, please don't let me fall, please don't let me fall. He slides smoothly past me and then turns to face me "maybe I should give you a little shove" he teases as he extends his hands to me. "Do it and you die" his arms shot straight back.

"I'll teach you" he says. "Okay" I answer him.

He tells me to keep holding the rail which I do, he then proceeds to grab hold of my other hand. One foot after the other, that's what he keeps telling me. As my feet begin to get used to the movement, I start to gain some speed. I can feel the cold air as it blows gently on my face, a little strand of hair breaks free from the hold of the beanie and tickles its way down my face.

"Time to gain some real speed" he smiles "move your hips along with your feet". I begin, right foot forward left hip back, left foot forward right hip back. I'm losing my balance, my feet begin to shake and I'm starting to lose my head. He lets go of my hand as he falls back behind me, I'm too proud to ask him for help. A warm sensation flows through me as his finger rests on the little exposed skin on my hip, I'm going to fall. He steadies me with both hands still on my hips.

"You're not really moving them" and my hips start swinging to his command. After a while I feel like I'm on auto mode, he lets go of me and is now right next me. My fingers only brush the rail occasionally and I muster up the courage to look up, I'm flying well at least that's how it feels. The lights on the buildings, the laughter of the people and the smile on his face, everything seems so precious when you are feeling so free.

We skate around for another hour occasionally holding hands. My skating skills are still very limited but the feeling that comes with the rush and the speed is intoxicating. I guess I should mention that I fell a couple of times, I lost my balance and fell onto my ass somehow though I managed to grab his hand in the process and drag hid down with me. It was fun.

8:15 pm

The smell is amazing. As we walk inside the restaurant I notice that there are no empty tables anywhere. I am about to tell him that when he walks to the man wearing a suit standing across from us "reservation for Kudo" he says. "Right this way sir your table has been set" the man replies. We make our way through the crowd of people and walk up a flight of stairs. The man who seemed like a butler walked across the room to the massive window and opened the door to the balcony.

Beautiful. The table was set on the balcony to perfection. The gentle blows of cold air skim my face, the scenery to my left is breathtaking. The restaurant overlooks a lake that shines under the moonlight, it is a full moon tonight. I turn my eyes to him and he's just giving me that goofy smile of his.

"What the hell is all this?" I ask him "when did you make a reservation here exactly"

"Do you like it?" he asked back.

"I do"

"Then it doesn't matter"

"Why though" I finally say.

"To make this day special" he replies.

"Yeah but why?"

"We really are asking the tough questions tonight aren't we?" I say nothing. "Ever thought how different our lives would have been if we met in a different way. Would our lives be better or worse? Would we be the people we are today? Would our relationship be any different? I don't usually think about that kind of thing but when I do those question always pop into my head. If you were to ask me what I would be doing ten years from now before I met you I would have told you because I knew but now I'm not sure of anything and what scares me is that it feels more exciting this way like maybe I'm glad it turned out like this, is that wrong? How do you think our story will end?"

How do I think our story will end, I never dared dream about the answer to that question. I never believed that we had a story at all. How our story ends is something that I have no control over but if I could just wish for and ending how would it go? I've never had a say in my life and I've never had the chance to wish for anything but if I did would I wish for him to be with me? Or for him to be happy? The latter, definitely the latter. Maybe.

"The view is amazing" I say desperate to change the subject. He chuckles "I thought you said we can talk about anything" he says. "Well then let's talk about the view". "I don't want to" he replies while keeping his eyes locked in mine. "Hope for the best and expect the worst" I told him. I knew that answer sparked a question inside him 'what is the best' but instead "what is the worst?" I give him a small smile "outliving you".

The restaurant certainly lived up to its reputation. The food was spectacular we sat and ate for a while, nothing really important was said after that conversation and I'm glad nothing did I couldn't take anymore. As we walk out of the restaurant, we walk towards the bus station when on the intersection between the two streets ahead of us I see a photo booth, so did he.

He leads me over to the booth and drops some coins into the machine.

We share a seat inside the booth and I take the beanie off waiting for the picture to be taken "hey you're not smiling!" he reaches a hand to my lips and forcing a smile on my face snap!

I look over at him annoyed but before I could do or say anything he reaches another hand and ruffles my hair snap!

I'm annoyed and I'm laughing. I strike before he gets the chance as I jab my arm into his side not too gently and he screams a laugh snap!

He is looking at me now and I'm looking at him. I act before I think and I reach both hands to his face bringing it close to me and kiss his on his left cheek snap!

We walk out of the booth and I'm too embarrassed to look at him. He takes the four pictures in hand "how about this" he says as he folds the picture in half and then tears them apart "I get two you get two" as he hands me my half. He kept the kiss to himself. Cheeky bastard.

10:20 pm

I'm still feeling a little wobbly. I fell asleep on his shoulder on the ride home and my neck aches a little. We reach Hakase's back door and turn to look at him "thank you for the best day in my life" I say, he smiles, I smile and we walk in. Hakase is there waiting for us I can see the anxiety on his face, he looks between the two of us and he smiles and again I smile. I leave the two men as I walk to my room without another word still wearing my smile.

THE END

I was thinking about writing an epilogue, tell me what you guys think.