A/N: I really appreciate all of your thoughtful reviews! They are so fun to read and it makes me happy that you all are invested in this story!
~o0o~
"'Mione, why are you here?" Sirius had just stepped through his floo when he turned around and saw Hermione brushing off some soot from jeans. She didn't respond, just took a few steps towards him and pressed her lips desperately to his. Sirius' first instinct was to wrap his arms around her and kiss her back. Every night he wished for her back in his arms and it was almost painful to pull away from her.
"What are you doing?" He tried to distance himself, to sound angry, but the crestfallen look on her face begged him to kiss her again, but he held himself together well enough to wait for her answer.
"I want you Sirius," she whispered, filling the space between them again and assaulting his senses with the sweet smell of her shampoo and lavender on her skin. He pulled her closer once more but kept her in a hug against his chest, even though her hands were moving below his waist and making it hard for him to concentrate.
"Stop! Fucking Merlin, Hermione, please!"
He pushed her away, taking three massive strides backwards, "Hermione I know I said that I wouldn't ask any more from you. That it could just be sex. But I can't keep that promise anymore." His voice shook and Hermione could feel the pain she caused him. The last time she saw that kind of fear in his eyes was when he first stepped out of the Veil after being gone for so long. It was the fear of the unknown that was paralyzing to him.
"It's over between Remus and I. It's completely over," she started to cry, collapsing onto the chair behind her. She had been so resolved to go to Grimmauld and have him shag her until she couldn't remember what she had just found, but the moment the first tear streaked down her cheek, she knew things had progressed far beyond a simple, physical solution.
"What happened? I thought you said you wanted things to work between the two of you? Did you talk?" Sirius was right back over at her side in an instant, arms around her, comforting her. He couldn't keep away. Even though his heart felt twisted and squeezed inside of his chest, the pain he was feeling was secondary to what she needed.
"Sirius…I can't right now…I just…you were right…" she managed through her tears, trying to wipe them away as quickly as she could. She hated feeling vulnerable around him. She hated that her life was falling apart like this.
"Shh…it's alright, come on, love, up we go…" Sirius said gently as he lifted her into his arms as if she were nothing. She wrapped her legs around his waist and her arms around his neck as he carried her up the squeaky stairs and to his bedroom, gently laying her down on the messy bed.
"Sorry…I wasn't expecting company," he apologized for the state of his bedroom and Hermione cracked a smile. It was a rare day that Sirius apologized for anything.
"This is not exactly how I intended this to go…" she said softly as she moved to find a pillow and she squished it to fluff it up as she tucked it under her head.
"I figured, but as much as I clearly want you," he gestured to the obvious bulge straining against his fitted trousers that had surprisingly stayed throughout his emotional torment, "I think it's best if we get things sorted out before you make any hasty decisions." He slipped off his shoes and sat down next to where she was lying on the bed. He took her hand in his and sadly fingered the simple ring on her left ring finger, "You are still a married woman, 'Mione. And I'm not sure I can go any further with this right now…"
"He doesn't love me," Hermione sniffed, "At least not anymore."
"One fight doesn't mean anything…" Sirius tried to console her, trying his best not to let his real feelings show on his face. He found it almost laughable how unconvincing he sounded.
"Then why would he want to stop me from getting pregnant with a baby of our own?" Her eyes found his in the semi-darkness of the room. He gently pushed some of her wild curls out of her face.
"That isn't something I can answer, love. That is something you need to hear from him."
"He's hiding out at Andromeda's. He didn't even stay and try and work things out, Sirius…" she gently pulled on his arm so that he would lie down next to her and he obliged with a heavy sigh. It was impossible for him to say not to her.
"What did you think coming here and trying to jump me was going to do?" he tried to lighten the mood, but her chocolate eyes only became more intense as they searched his.
"I just want to forget," she told him and he replied with a sad smile. He understood her, but he didn't want to be Hermione's way to escape reality. He wanted it to mean something. Initially he thought just having her would satisfy the physical need, but his feelings for her were far beyond that.
"I know you do. But I think maybe some sleep will help with that more than I can. Why don't you close your eyes for a bit and I'll try and put something together for dinner," he offered and she gave him a nod in return as he pulled away from her and stood up to walk down to the kitchen. Hermione drew the covers up over her, surrounding herself with his smell, and dozed off.
~o0o~
"You are a son to me Remus, but that does not give you the right to walk in here and not explain yourself," Andromeda Tonks stood at the doorway to the den where Remus was transfiguring the couch into something more suitable to sleep on. When she had answered the door, he breezed past her with a simple "I'm spending the night" and went to make himself at home. She was nearly as tall as Remus, the tallest of the Black sisters, and she drew herself up even taller as she strode toward him.
"Not now, Andromeda," Remus snapped and instantly regretted it. He just couldn't bear to look into her soft, wide eyes right now-they were the same as her daughter's.
"Is there a problem at home?"
"You could say that."
"And my grandson?"
"He's fine. He's with Harry and Ginny tonight. I suppose he'll be back with Hermione tomorrow," Remus answered, finally turning to his mother-in-law. The barely there age difference between them was a cold reminder that his late wife was taken well before her time.
"You suppose?" She kept up with her line of questioning, and he was starting to think he should have just booked a room at the Leaky for a few days.
"Yes, I suppose, Andromeda. I need a bit of time away right now. Can you try and understand that?" He slipped his coat off, "I'll figure things out as soon as I can."
"No, Remus. You'll figure things out tomorrow. I'll give you one night here and then you either start talking, or I'll send you on your way, understood? I'm not sure what is going on with you, but this isn't the Remus I know," her glare made him feel guilty and sick to his stomach, a skill only Molly Weasley had used on him to such a dramatic effect, "Goodnight."
"Night," Remus whispered, sitting down onto the elongated cushion of the couch and running his hand through his sandy hair. A wave of regret washed over him, but there was not much he could do now but see if the morning brought any clarity.
~o0o~
Hermione awoke to the light shining in through the windows of Sirius' bedroom and the sheets that she had still pulled close around her body still smelled slightly spicy, like he did, even if he was not in the room. Sirius had placed Hermione's things on the bedside table with care and she grabbed her wand and got out of bed, still in her clothes from the night before. She found Sirius on the couch, asleep, in the library, his face looking tired even in his slumber and his hair disheveled.
Once she realized the time, she knew picking Teddy up from Ginny and Harry's would need to happen soon, so she freshened her clothes with some charms and went to the kitchen to round up a bit of breakfast to say thank you to Sirius for the hospitality. The dinner he had made for him that she had apparently slept straight through was in the refrigerator and the gesture made her smile.
Hermione found what she needed for two bacon sandwiches and some coffee and brought them to Sirius, gently rubbing his shoulder to wake him and he groggily sat up, looking like he had a rough night.
"You didn't have to do this…" he motioned to the food but took a grateful bite of his sandwich anyway.
"I should do more. You've been kinder to me than I have any right to expect," she sighed, thinking of what a gentleman he had been. He had rejected her advances and helped her get a much needed night of rest without any regard for his own comfort, sleeping far away so she could have her space.
"You deserve the world, Hermione. Just don't tell anyone I said that. I have a reputation to keep up, you know…" he winked at her, a little life returning to his features and she briefly wondered what he had been up thinking about for most of the night.
"I need to go get Teddy…"
"You need to tell Harry and Ginny what is going on, 'Mione."
She knew he was right. But the thought of admitting that her seemingly perfect relationship was flawed possibly beyond repair was a hard pill to swallow where her pride was concerned, "And Teddy?"
"I'm sure he has already figured out some things, but try and keep him as distanced from all this as possible. I'm sure it is hard enough to know you two are fighting…" Sirius advised. She left her own sandwich relatively untouched and gave Sirius a kiss on the cheek before making her way to Harry and Ginny's.
~o0o~
"Is everything okay? Harry and I were worried and we tried to Floo call you, but you didn't seem to be home…" Ginny seemed more than just her average high-strung self when she answered the door to their lovely home in the suburbs outside of London, not very far from Remus and Hermione's home.
"I hope Teddy wasn't a bother. I know you both have enough on your plate with Albus and James," Hermione's tone was apologetic as Ginny ushered her inside and she heard Teddy's laugh coming from the next room.
"He was an angel, as usual. He's dressed and fed for school. I'm sorry, 'Mione but I have to get going to practice, but I hope we can talk about this soon?" Her look implied that a conversation was absolutely necessary and Hermione gave her friend a hug before the red-head disappeared.
"Harry?"
"In here, 'Mione…" Harry's voice called out to her from their living room and she found her best friend and Teddy sitting on the couch together as three-year-old Albus and two-year-old James played with some stuffed animals on the floor.
"Mum, where's dad?" Teddy asked; it was clear he was anxious. His hair was dark and messy, perfectly matching Harry's today.
"We'll talk about that in a little bit, Teddy, okay? Harry…is there any way I can talk to you alone?" Hermione tried to keep her voice calm, but Harry knew her well enough to know how much distress she was in.
"Sure. Teddy, do you think you can watch the boys for a bit? Call if you need anything, we'll just be in the next room."
Teddy looked chuffed at the sudden responsibility as Harry led Hermione into his kitchen and his worried look prompted her to blurt out all of her concerns while carefully avoiding any mention or involvement of Sirius.
"So, Remus has run out on you because he doesn't like you and Teddy being so close and he doesn't want another kid?" Harry was trying to wrap his brain around the highly uncharacteristic behavior of the man he always considered one of his greatest mentors.
"Harry…I think we might be headed for a divorce…he can't get over Tonks. It's like he is refusing to. He's running away from not only me, but Teddy as well and I just have to say that I am so, so sorry that he dropped Teddy off here and expected you to take him," Hermione wiped her tears with the back of her hand and Harry reached out to gently rub her forearm.
"Teddy is always welcome here. You know that. I'm on your side with this Hermione. I'll help you in any way that I can and I know Ginny would feel the same. This just came out of nowhere. I thought things were so good for you both."
"So did I. It just started a few weeks ago and he's completely unwilling to talk about it," Hermione said, feeling a twinge of guilt at the role she had played in possibly causing such a downward spiral, but pushed it away.
"Maybe he'll talk to me? Maybe I'll stop by Andromeda's after work and see if he's there," Harry tried to find anyway to make Hermione a little bit hopeful about the situation but she just waved him off, apologized again, and promised that she would get out of Harry's way and stop interrupting his morning with his precious children.
"I know you have always had a hard time asking for help, but I'm going to do what I can for you, no matter what you say," Harry promised, almost stubbornly, as he walked with Hermione to collect Teddy.
"And I love you for it, harry. Have a good day, alright?" she whispered sadly and held Teddy's hand, ready to take him to school.
A/N: A little bit of a transitional chapter but hope you all liked it! Reviews welcome!