AN: Basically, someone once asked Vic at one of his panels what would happen if Ed and Tamaki crossed paths. This fic is pretty much his answer, only with a lot more detail in it.

(Set in AU, where Ed is a transfer student at Ouran, but retains his usual personality from FMA. The story also jumps between Ed's and Haruhi's POV.)

As Ed ambled through the large hallways of the elite Ouran Academy, he couldn't help but let out a sight of exhaustion. Since being accepted as a scholarship student to the school, never once had it occurred to him during his preparation that it may have been a good idea to know where your classes would be BEFORE your first day.

But now here he was, halfway through the day and still trying to familiarize himself with the vast building. More specifically, trying to locate his algebra class as he continued to glance down at his schedule and then around each hallway, hoping to catch a glimpse of Room #19.

Not for the first time that day, Ed tugged at his necktie and collar in annoyance, trying to ease the constraint it had on his neck. When Ed had learnt that he would have to abide by the academy's uniform, which included a blue jacket and necktie, in place of his red cloak, he hadn't objected much, but now he would give anything to change uniforms solely because of the death-grip the collar seemed to have on his neck!

Ed had tried to get assistance from other students or staff members to point him in the right direction, but the last three classrooms he had poked his head into had been oddly vacant. Growing irritable, Ed rounded a corner and couldn't help but notice two large pink doors, with a sign overhead reading Music Room #3.

Though Ed doubted there would be anyone in the music room at the time, he decided it'd be worth a shot if he could get finally get someone to direct him towards his next class. Shrugging, he advanced and made his way through the large doors.

As if on cue, a swarm of pink petals suddenly seemed to swirl about, clouding Ed's vision for a moment. When the flurry died down, Ed could make out the image of seven figures, students of the academy presumably due to their similar blue uniforms, all in a line in the room's center. In a still formation.

Almost as if they were waiting for anyone to walk in.

"Gentlemen, it seems we have ourselves a guest." The figure in the center said, also the only one sitting in a chair.

"But Tama-chan, he has a boys' uniform..." Replied the shortest of the group, who Ed noted was holding a stuffed bunny and looked too young to be in the high school division.

The young man in the chair stood up, his grin fading.

"Ah, so he is. But who are we, those gifted with such elite and excellent social standing, to discriminate against gender? Welcome young man, to the Ouran host club!"

The young man stretched his arm out, eyes closed, and an ecstatic tone in his voice that Ed could only assume was due to this student's high taste for theatrics and such.

Nevertheless, Ed sweat-dropped as a sudden deadpan silence filled the room, as if this man was waiting for a reply from Ed.

"Uh…yeah, thanks, anyway…"

Ed's thoughts were distracted again once he took a look around the room, his eyes finally landing on the other students in the room. Two of them had jet-black hair, though one also had glasses and was scribbling something in a notebook. The one who had referred to the supposed ringleader as 'Tama-Chan' had blonde hair and was still hugging his stuffed bunny to his chest. Two of the students had identically-colored light auburn hair which led Ed to immediately assume the two were twins. The final student had short brunette hair but what came as a bit of a surprise to Ed was that although the student was wearing a boys' uniform, this student seemed to be a girl, the only one in the group. It was with some curiosity that Ed wondered how she had wound up with the others.

The one who had greeted him, also with blonde hair, and seemed to carry a tall and proud stature, walked towards Ed, his arm now outstretched towards him. Though Ed's arm remained limp at his side, the taller student still grabbed his hand and pumped it up and down.

"I am Tamaki Suoh, the leader of this host club, and just who might you be good fellow?"

Ed was about to reluctantly respond until the student with glasses and a notebook chimed in.

"According to the last update of this division's roll call, he is Edward Elric, and he's here on a scholarship following his entrance exams." came his statement.

Ed felt the need to intervene and ask how they already knew so much about him, but found his thoughts constantly getting off-track and remembered why he had entered this room in the first place.

"He's a commoner?" Tamaki replied, eyes widening.

"A what?" Ed finally spat out. His patience was already wearing thin but he decided to just get over it and focus on his first objective. "Look, can any of you just tell me…"

But Tamaki wasn't listening. Instead, he turned towards the only girl in the group.

"The eyes of fate have it Haruhi! Who would've thought another of your people would find his way into our world of beauty? We'll have to take advantage of this most auspicious event!"

Tamaki strolled towards Ed and flung his arm over his shoulder.

"It's not every day a poor person such as yourself is given the opportunity to outshine in an academy such as Ouran, so why not seize this chance while you can! Grab the glory at your fingertips and become a member of our host club! We're always looking for new…"

Now it was Ed's turn not to listen. He kept shaking Tamaki's arm off his shoulder, but the boy wasn't getting the hint and kept drawing Ed in close to him again, as if Ed were an old friend Tamaki hadn't seen in years.

Meanwhile, Haruhi groaned inward as she listened to Tamaki go on and on, his intent to recruit this new student into the club very evident.

If this guy values his sanity, he'd better seize the chance while he can and run as far away from this room as possible! Haruhi thought, still somewhat embarrassed over the events that had gotten her unwillingly into the host club. At least there's no chance of this kid knocking over an antique vase, so he has that going for him.

Haruhi then noted with some interest, as Ed kept trying to make some distance between him and Tamaki's closeness, that there was something about the two boys that struck her as…similar. Heck, even their voices were practically alike.

For the umpteenth time, Ed flung Tamaki's arm off his shoulder and finally found his voice.

"Look kid, I'm not interested in joining your little clubhouse, all I'm trying to do is locate…"

"Tamaki, if I may intervene, it would be difficult to find a place for Edward within the club considering we have a perfect blend of personality traits already at our disposal." The student with the notebook said.

Ed's irritation was beginning to creep up again. Here he was, still unable to get his original question out, while meanwhile, this group of eccentrics was already looking for a position for him! In a club of which Ed still had clue of its purpose above all things!

Tamaki turned back to face Ed, apparently unaware of the annoyed expression on Ed's face.

"You see my fellow commoner, here at the host club, our members carry a distinct personality trait, meant to meet any and all needs of our guests!"

Tamaki began gesturing to each of the students as he went on.

"There's Kyoya, the 'cool' type, Mitsukuni Haninozuka, the 'boy-lolita' type, Takashi Morinozuka, the 'strong-but-silent' type, the Hitachiin twins, the 'little devil' type, Haruhi Fujioka, the 'natural' type, and of course, there's me, the 'Prince Charming' type! If you become a member of the host club, we'll have to find something about you that stands out among the rest of us."

It was only once Tamaki had finished did Ed suddenly understand, this was a club meant to cater to and host girls! At least, that was what he assumed.

Don't tell me girls actually fall for this gig here. Ed thought, these guys must be crazy!

"Look, I already said I don't wanna join you guys, if you'd just listen to me, then you'd…"

Almost expectedly, Ed was cut off again, this time by the Hitachiin twins, who spoke in perfect unison.

"Hey boss, there's something familiar about this guy." They observed, eyeing Ed with wandering eyes that for some reason, only irritated Ed even more. Tamaki turned again to gaze Ed from head to toes.

"Really? I don't see it. Haruhi! Perhaps you can help us, maybe you know something about this boy, after all, who better to have first-hand experience with commoners other than yourself?" Tamaki announced.

"Dammit, quit calling me a commoner!" Ed yelled, the annoyance now obvious in his voice. "For the last time, all I'm trying to do is find Math Room #19!"

Kyoya made a downwards gesture with his pencil. "On the floor below here, right off the next flight of stairs if you continue down this hallway." He said plainly.

"Thanks." Ed grumbled. To say the least, he was pleased he had gotten at least one answer. As he turned to exit the room, he heard Tamaki say to the others.

"What a shame, he's practically host club-material."

Ed knew it would be benefit him greater to just leave the room and not turn back, but his curiosity got the better of him again and he turned back to face the group, a little taken aback to suddenly see Tamaki curled up in one of the room's corners.

"Really?" he muttered, trying to detect any hint of sarcasm in Tamaki's words. "I'm host club-material?"

Tamaki glanced back, his grin and blissful demeanor having returned, and strolled towards Ed, flinging his arm back across Ed's shoulders, and not noticing the vein that popped up on Ed's forehead.

"I see no reason why not my friend! In fact, if it weren't for your short stature, I'm sure…"

That was as far as Tamaki got. Ed grabbed the arm Tamaki had around his shoulders and flung the taller boy onto his back all in one swift motion, a large thud echoing throughout the room.

"WHO ARE YOU CALLING SHORT?!" he bellowed before turning on his heel and departing from the room, the doors slamming behind him with an almost livid crash.

Hikaru and Kaoru looked over Tamaki's defeated form with much amusement, their eyes having lit up as if their prior mystery had been solved.

"You know boss, that kid's just like you in a lot of ways!" they chortled.

Even Haruhi had to hold back a laugh. The mere thought of Senpai being undermined by a scholarship student such as herself was almost enough to send her into a laughing fit. Almost.

Oh well, the host club's not for everyone, she grinned.