Alison's POV

"Emily," I coo into the silence, "we have to talk about it sooner or later." I slowly approach her as her back is turned to me.

"I'd rather not. At least not now." She says while snatching away from me as I try to touch her shoulder.

"Em, please? It's killing me not to. We need to figure out what this is, what we are."

"Did you mean it, what you said about you actually having feelings for me?"

Em peeked at me over her right shoulder. I take a step back giving her space to turn around to face me. She turns to face me with her arms crossed.

"Y-yes. Of course. I meant every word."

"Why did you make me think that you didn't? You really hurt me, Alison." Em said almost enraged.

I broke eye contact with her and looked all around my before my eyes finally settled on the floor space between us.

"Because I… I couldn't admit it to myself, that I saw you as more than a friend. I didn't want you to know." I shamefully say with tears welling up in my eyes.

Her demeanor softens. She takes a small step towards me, but I back away from her. I don't like being this vulnerable, not even with Em.

"Why wouldn't you want me to know? Why did you kiss me one day and the next totally throw it back in my face?"

"I told you, I couldn't admit it to myself," I snap back, "Nevermind. I don't think I'm ready to talk about this."

I'm feeling trapped. I still don't like the power Emily has over me. She knows she has it now. I start walking towards my bedroom door.

"Well we are. What was so bad about you telling me?"

"I can't…."

The air around us is cold and still. Emily, standing in front of me, looks confused, hurt, angry, and compassionate at the same time. I'm trying to choke back my tears, but it's no use.

"Ali.." she says while grabbing my shoulders ever so gently and pulling me closer to her.

"I couldn't tell you because…. Because I didn't want you to know how much power you had over me."

I try to avoid eye contact with her. She takes her warm hand and gently whisks the falling tears from my check. Her touch is so soft. So gentle. It's intoxicating.

"Power..?"

"You are the only person that has ever made me feel special, Em. You made me feel like a million bucks on my crappiest days. You were always able to break away my bitch exterior. You've always seen me as a good person, even when I didn't. You make me feel safe and loved like no one has ever done before. You've always seen the best of me…"

"Ali, I.." I interrupt her mid sentence.

"I'm in love with you, Emily."

She froze. She stood there, not saying a word. Her expression was static. It stood in a confused manner.

"Em..?" No answer, "Emily?"

"I, uhh.. I have to go."

"Wait, why?"

"Uhhhh.. I have a lot of homework to do. I'll see you at school tomorrow."

She speeds out of the room like nobody's business. What just happened? Did I scare her? Does she not want me to love her? Does she not believe me? She left me in a disarray of emotions and questions. I walk over to my bed and sit. I don't understand. Two hot stream of tears began to roll uncontrollably down my cheeks. I curl up in fetal position and bury my face in my pillow.

Maybe she doesn't love me anymore.