Well, hello. It's been what…two years? Well, if you came from my Hetalia stories, I am really sorry. Capital Offense has not been updated because I lost inspiration. I can't come up with demands or a motive, so I have left my poor capitals stuck in that room. I will try to get back to it, I have not given up.

That being said, welcome to a story that is a crossover of two fandoms I have not yet written in! I have been a fan of Doctor Who for a couple years, and discovered Welcome to Night Vale in March. I love it. Just love it. And after Old Oak Doors, I was understandably upset that Carlos got trapped in the other desert world. I refuse to let him stay there. Special thanks to my friend RasenganFin for help with this story, and various ideas.

This takes place right after Capital Campaign, but is not compliant with Rumbling for Night Vale. For Doctor Who, this takes place immediately before Utopia.

Neither franchise is mine, as I am not part of the BBC and I am not Joseph Fink…or am I?

"Cecil, when all of this is over…there's something I want to show you."

When Cecil woke up, he wished he was still asleep. Still, he forced himself to open his eyes and face the empty side of the bed next to him.

It didn't hurt any less than yesterday. Or the day before.

"But Carlos, why can't you show me now?"

"Because I don't care of the Sherriff's Secret Police know about this, but StrexCorp can't find out. So once they're gone for good, then I promise, I'll show you."

"Okay, Carlos. I can't wait."

He'd been dreaming of the last time he'd seen his boyfriend (in the flesh, not some manifestation in his studio or an image on his phone screen). The scientist had looked up from the Parade Day plans and promised to show Cecil something. At the time, the radio host had thought it would be a matter of days before it was fulfilled. Now, he held onto it like a lifeline.

Carlos would come back. He had a promise to keep.

Sighing, he reluctantly got up to face the day with a heavy heart.

DW/WTNV

The TARDIS had a lot of rooms. That was actually a huge understatement, but there really were no words to describe the sheer amount of rooms the ship contained, so a lot would suffice. Every day yielded a new one, no matter how long a person traveled with the Doctor. It was possible that the Time Lord didn't even know about all of its rooms.

Today, Martha Jones had come across the Radio Room. Like its name suggested, it was filled from top to bottom with radios from every time period and corner of the universe. There were easily recognizable ones from Earth, and then there were objects that she only called radios because everything else in this room was one. One even looked like a plain rock, but was clearly a radio due to the sound it emitted and the dial on its side. Every one of them was on, but somehow the noise wasn't deafening. It was close, though.

There was one small, old-fashioned radio that Martha almost missed as she walked past, humming along to a popular song in New New York while listening to one of Roosevelt's Fireside Chats. But what came out of it caught her attention, because it was…strange.

"Trumpets playing soft Jazz from out of the dark desert distance. They come tomorrow. It is too late for us.

"Welcome to Night Vale."

The words brought her up short, and she stared at the source while intro music played. Intrigued, she picked up the small radio and carried it to a soundproof chamber for listening without interference from the others.

The Doctor found her in the midst of a statement apparently released by a "faceless old woman." With a big grin, he sat next to her and asked "What are you listening to , Martha?"

"One of those fake radio shows, I think."

"Oh? Why do you think that?"

"Well, it can't be real. I mean, we've seen some strange stuff, but how can someone with no face release a recorded statement? And the announcer was talking about a girl being trapped in a dog park, and a man in tan jacket who sells trained flies out of a deerskin briefcase. There's just no way this Night Vale place is real!"

The Doctor perked up. "Night Vale? Oh, I haven't been there in a goat's age! Lovely place, even if time is a bit wonky."

Martha couldn't help it; she gaped at him. "It's real? And you've been there?!"

"Sure!" The Doctor grinned. By now, the host, with his deep, smooth voice, was talking again. "Went there by accident, met this nice kid. His mother actually told him-"

"Someone's going to kill you one day, Cecil," the announcer said before the Doctor could get a full word out, "and it will involve a mirror. Mark my words, child! And then she would stare absently through my eyes until I giggled."

The Doctor's jaw dropped. "No way!" he exclaimed. "Is that Cecil Palmer? Blimey, when I met him, he was just an intern. Now he's a full-blown radio host! Oh, brilliant!"

Martha laughed. "So I take it he's a friend of yours?"

"Oh, yes. Landed in Night Vale a while back, in his living room. Helped him figure out how to survive Street Cleaning Day. He was fifteen, and had big dreams of one day being the community radio host. Good to see he made it." A roar from the radio made them jump, followed by Cecil talking about cats. "You know, I should congratulate him. What do you say, Martha; care to visit Night Vale?"

She was a little apprehensive, but if the Doctor had a friend there, how bad could it be? "All right, why not?"

Leaving the radio, they tromped to the console room, where with an "Allons-y!" they were off.

WTNV/DW

Doing his errands had been a bad idea. He appreciated the sympathetic glances, he really did, but they just got old, and sometimes made him feel worse. Cecil kept his head down as he approached Big Rico's, trying to avoid looking at the lab next door. Trying desperately not to think about being kissed just once, just softly.

Carlos' absence was really affecting him. He just couldn't find it in himself to take interest in much of anything lately. Time was when he would have gushed over how adorable the rabbits that had overrun the community college were, but now he couldn't bring himself to care. He just wanted Carlos safe, he wanted him home.

A sudden wheezing, groaning noise pulled him out of his thoughts. Confused, he looked around, trying to locate the source of it. The sound was familiar, but it wasn't made by a Street Cleaner, or a Spiderwolf, or anything in Night Vale. He couldn't quite put his finger on where he'd heard it before. Finally, his eyes alighted on a blue object fading in and out of existence, becoming more opaque with each passing moment. Memory returned then, of that same box materializing in his living room when he was fifteen. With one of his first true grins in a while, he began heading toward it as it stopped fading and the noise tapered off.

The door opened as he approached, and a familiar face poked out. The rest of the man belonging to it followed, as well as a young woman. The man was chattering as he glanced about. "Hasn't changed much, really, even Big Rico's is still here! Now to find…" He spotted Cecil walking towards them. "Ah, there he is!" He bounded forward and enthusiastically shook the radio host's hand. "Cecil! Good to see you! Blimey, but you've grown!"

"And you are the same as years ago, Doctor. Have you been practicing black magic?"

"Oh, no, no, nothing like that, just a combination of Time Lord physiology and time travel." A pity. StrexCorp had destroyed Khoshek's litterbox, and it would have been nice if the Doctor could have fixed it. "Anyway, Martha, meet Cecil! Cecil, this is my companion Martha."

"Nice to meet you." the young woman, Martha, said as she stepped forward to shake his hand.

"And you as well."

"Martha here stumbled across your radio show, and I thought we'd come congratulate you on becoming the Voice of Night Vale!"

Minutes later found them sitting in Big Rico's Pizza, catching up. The Doctor, being an alien and having been to Night Vale before, took what Cecil knew outsiders to consider "oddities" in stride. Martha had seen strange things traveling with him, but she still questioned things like the distinct lack of crust in their pizza. At one point, she spotted and Erika ("Is that-" "Definitely not an angel. Angels only tell lies and do not exist." "At least it's not made of stone.") and she almost pointed out a Hooded Figure before Cecil rapped his fork on the table and hastily started telling them about the lights above the Arby's. In hindsight, that was a bad topic to pick.

"…as a matter of fact, that's where C...C-Carlos…"

When Cecil trailed off, slumping over his half eaten stewed tomatoes and cheese, Martha felt a wave of sympathy. "Who's Carlos?" she asked gently.

"My…my boyfriend." Cecil answered. "He…"

Martha was expecting many answers, like died in a car crash or was in a coma, but she did not anticipate what came out of Cecil's mouth.

"…went into the House that Doesn't Exist and is now trapped in a strange other desert world."

The Doctor leaned forward, eyes alight with an emotion that brought to mind the story he'd told Martha about his lost friend. "Cecil," he said, voice grave, "what happened?"

So Cecil told them everything. He told them about the yellow helicopters and the disappearance of Old Woman Josie. He spoke of StrexCorp systematically buying Night Vale's businesses, of the StrexPet and the purchase of the Girl Scouts and threats to his niece and the transdimensional orange juice. Of Lauren Mallard and Daniel and…Kevin. He laid out the tale of the failed Parade Day and brave Tamika Flynn, of the horrors of the company picnic. He related the light and the rumbling and the Smiling God, and the brave scientist who found a way to keep those things from Night Vale only to be trapped on the wrong side of closed doors. He laid it all out as though he were sitting in his booth, speaking sweetly to his microphone, and just like all of Night Vale during those times, Martha and the Doctor were his rapt audience.

Cecil ended with a brief explanation of the other desert world. Silence fell when he was finished.

"I'm sorry, Cecil." The Doctor said after a beat. "I'm so sorry." Martha nodded in agreement.

"It's okay, really. He'll be fine, a scientist is always fine." Even as he said it, Martha knew he was trying to convince himself of this fact, and her heart went out to him.

"Doctor…isn't there something we can do to help?"

Cecil perked up at this, but the Time Lord shook his head. "I don't know, Martha, if he's trapped in a parallel universe, then it's impossible. We don't know enough about this 'other desert world' to say if he is or isn't." The Doctor wasn't used to being so hesitant to at least try, but the anguish over Rose was still quite fresh. He didn't want to get Cecil's hopes up and then crush them.

However, Cecil was possessed of a dogged determination, and was good at figuring out what to say to get people on his side.

"The Faceless Old Woman who secretly lives in your home uses my hall closet to store her obscure shoe collection. Among them is a pair of limited edition, recalled Converse sneakers."

The Doctor swallowed it hook, line, and sinker. "What color?"

"Bullseye red."

"Can't hurt to take a look. Allons-y!"

DW/WTNV

The Doctor decided that the best place to look for a link between Night Vale and the other desert world was where Carlos entered said world, so he parked the TARDIS in front of the House that Doesn't Exist. Cecil's reaction on entering had been…lackluster. He had merely commented on how clever it was to be able to fit a large interior inside a small exterior ("Well, that's a first." The Doctor muttered).

The Doctor began taking readings of the house, leaving the two humans to their own devices. After explaining to Martha how the house seemed like it existed, like it was right there when you looked at it, and was between two houses similar to it, so it would make more sense for it to exist, but the scientists had done extensive tests and it simply did not exist, he passed the time by regaling her with stories of Carlos.

"Wait," she interrupted at one point, "you're telling me that on a day where everything was so lazy people's organs and even gravity stopped working, he was doing chores?!"

"He was," Cecil grinned, "and for our one month anniversary he gave me this watch…"

After several more stories, including how the two got together, Martha smiled knowingly and said "The way you talk about him, this Carlos must be something special."

"He is," Cecil sighed dreamily. "My perfectly imperfect Carlos."

Martha laughed. "Imperfect? That's not a word most people would use."

"Well, I used to call him perfect, until I realized perfection isn't real, or human. But he is so smart, and handsome, and into science…"

With another laugh, and a wide grin, Martha remarked "I can't wait to see him, then, it he's so handsome."

"I have some pictures on my phone!" Cecil replied, pulling the device out. He brought up a picture he thought Carlos looked especially cute in, and showed it to Martha, who whistled. "He is a looker, all right." The Doctor, who had been listening with half an ear, let curiosity take over and went to have a look.

The man depicted was wearing goggles and a lab coat, and his face was streaked with soot. In his hand was a beaker, the contents of which had clearly just exploded. Despite this, the man's hair was amazing. None of this, however, was the reason for the Doctor's eyes widening in astonishment or his sudden outburst.

"Is that the Scientist?!"

Cecil and Martha stared at him. "Why, yes," Cecil said slowly, "that is my boyfriend, Carlos the Scientist."

"No, no," the Doctor replied, running his hands through his already wild hair in agitation. "That's not what I meant. But…it can't be…"

"Doctor, do you know him?" Martha asked.

"I…yes, I do. Knew him in the Academy back home. Last time I saw him was just before the Time War."

Now it was Martha's turn to be astonished. "You mean h's another Time Lord?! But I thought you were the last one!"

"Doctor, are you saying that my boyfriend's an alien?"

"Yes, Cecil, I'm sorry, this must come as a shock-"

"That is so cool." Cecil interrupted with a grin. "Much cooler than if he was a secret government agent, take that Steve Carlsberg."

"But Doctor," Martha interjected, "how could he have escaped the Time War?"

"Well, he might not have been on Gallifrey in the first place. It was always difficult to pull the Scientist away from his experiments."

"We're working on that," Cecil piped up. "He's gotten much better about calling when he needs to cancel dates to get some science done."

The Doctor stared at him for a moment before saying sincerely, "You are very good for him." Cecil beamed.

WTNV/DW

He fell to the ground, and knew that this was it. The weapons were tiny, but deadly. The wounds were serious, fatal unless he got medical help, and none of the onlookers were making a move to rescue him…not that he would technically need rescuing. He could feel the energy building up, could see the golden glow start in his hands.

I'll have to leave, he thought. I thought I had more time.

Once the regeneration finished, he couldn't stay. He'd known, of course, that Night Vale wouldn't be permanent. Surely even this town would find someone who didn't appear to age strange (years later, he would realize how much he underestimated Night Vale).

He didn't want to leave. There was too much scientific discovery in this town. He didn't want to leave the unfelt earthquakes or the House that Doesn't Exist or the clocks which weren't real or the girl born as an adult man's hand or Cecil-

Cecil. Oh. Oh.

Just as he had that epiphany, strong arms lifted him up in a bear hug-

Carlos jerked himself out of the memory. Sleep might not have been necessary in the other desert world, but it seemed that being lost in recollections of the past was its substitute. He noted that as a data point. However, Dana hadn't reported such experiences; rather, she experienced mostly nostalgia. Perhaps their different biologies was a factor to be considered.

Speaking of which…Carlos took a few deep breaths, trying to calm his racing hearts. The memory had been so vivid, had seemed so real, that he had, for a moment, thought he was once again regenerating under the pin retrieval area of Lane 5, and simultaneously realizing his feelings for Cecil. Of all the things he had seen and experienced in his long life, and he kept getting pulled into that. Apparently not even discovering that his entire home planet was gone could compare.

Well, it made sense; he missed Cecil terribly. The radio host was one of the best non-scientific things to happen to him. Their relationship was another, and Carlos had gotten to the point where he was ready to let Cecil know him not just as Carlos, but as the Scientist as well. And before getting trapped, he'd had plans to reveal his alienness. He was searching for a way back to Night Vale, which was now more of a home than Gallifrey had been, so that he could carry out this plan and hold his boyfriend once more. In the interim, the other desert world was just full to the brim with scientific discovery.

It was when he was scanning a cactus (that he just couldn't explain) with the secondary sonic device installed in his Danger Meter (it wasn't as good as his primary sonic, but that was back in Night Vale) that he heard a sound. It was a distinct sound, one that he would recognize anywhere-like Cecil's voice-and that he thought he would never hear again. If he was hearing right, it was the sound of a TARDIS being operated with the brakes on. It seemed to be coming from behind him…

Turning around, his eyes took in the incredible, inexplicable sight of an object materializing. It had the shape of a blue Police Box common in London in the 1960s, and kept that shape rather than try to blend in.

There was only one Time Lord he knew who drove with the brakes on. Only one Time Lord with a Chameleon Circuit that malfunctioned in that way. As if to confirm his suspicions, the Danger Meter jumped from yellow (the scientifically middlemost dangerous color of all) to the maximum red. It was always dangerous when he was involved.

The blue box finished materializing as he came to that conclusion, and the door opened with a creak.

After the revelation regarding the object of their rescue, the Doctor had thrown himself into his readings with a new fervor. Soon, he had found a stable link wide enough for TARDIS travel and set them on a course to the other desert world. The Doctor then set the TARDIS to bring them to anyone with Time Lord DNA (it was a good thing Carlos was an alien; had he been human, the search might have lead them to Kevin first).

Once they landed and the Doctor confirmed that there was, indeed, a Time Lord outside, Cecil rushed to the door and opened it. Looking out, he squealed "Carlos!" and rushed out. Martha and the Doctor shared an amused look before they followed him.

Carlos was beyond shocked when his boyfriend burst out of the box, but he recovered quickly enough to run and meet him halfway. They came together in a tangle of limbs, filled with kisses and many utterances of I missed you so much and I love you. They each held each other tight, convicted in the resolution that they would never let the other go again.

It was after a period of time that was simultaneously and eternity and not nearly long enough (and not solely due to the weirdness of time here) that Carlos pulled back enough to ask "Cecil, how…?"

The radio host grinned. "My friend the Doctor is to thank, dear Carlos."

He really should have known. Of course the Doctor had been to Night Vale. There was hardly any corner of the universe that man hadn't visited. For the first time, Carlos was able to look past Cecil at the two people who had exited the box behind him and hung back, watching the reunion.

"Hullo, Scientist." The tall, skinny man in the brown coat called, giving a little wave. The young woman next to him smiled in greeting.

"Hello, Doctor. You've regenerated."

"Couple time, yeah."

"The Doctor told me," Cecil said, "that you are an alien, from far out in the void of space, just like him."

Carlos' hearts sank in dread. Cecil knew, he knew and Carlos hadn't told him, he must be furious. "Yes, Cecil, I am. I'm sorry, I understand if you're mad-"

"Mad? No, Carlos, I'm not mad! Without our secrets, where would we be? We certainly wouldn't have a Museum of Forbidden Technologies, now would we?"

DW/WTNV

The four relocated to the TARDIS, where the Doctor, after introducing the Scientist to Martha, asked the other Time Lord just how he escaped the fate of their race.

"I was conducting an experiment that had to be monitored almost constantly over an extended period of time, so I didn't get the message calling me back to Gallifrey until it was over." Carlos explained. "When I tried to go back, it was…gone."

He was, understandably, horrified to learn that the Doctor had destroyed their home planet, but quickly forgot it in a rapid-fire delivery of questions as to how. It was at that poing that the Doctor decided to return to Night Vale.

When he tried to take off, however, the TARDIS only shuddered, groaning as the sound of the engine died down. Frowning, he flipped several switches and pulled a couple levers, to no avail. Carlos stepped in to help, but it still didn't budge. By now the Time Lords were getting frantic, and the Doctor consulted his screen, eyes bugging.

"We've been caught in a paradox!" He cried, and edge of panic to his voice. "But how…"

"Paradoxes are a daily occurrence in Night Vale." The Scientist informed him. "They don't last very long, and the citizens aren't affected, but they make TARDIS travel impossible for their duration.

"So maybe we should wait until this one ends?" Martha suggested. Carlos shook his head. "There's no way to know how long it will last, and with time being even more off here than in town, it's possible that the paradox could end up on an endless loop."

"We need to break out of it," the Doctor concluded, "but how? I don't think the usual methods will work."

Carlos, who had been in deep thought, suddenly snapped his fingers. "A research partner of mine and I were stuck in a similar situation. Doctor, do you have a sonic device?"

"Yeah, Screwdriver." The Doctor replied, pulling it out.

"Perfect." He turned to Cecil, who had been quietly, happily watching his boyfriend. "Cecil, I am about to do something very important and scientific, and I need your help."

Cecil squealed. Like, actually squealed, like a little girl. "I get to help with science?"

Carlos nodded. "I need you to let me borrow the watch I gave you." Nodding, Cecil eagerly removed the watch and handed it to Carlos, who strapped it to his wrist. The feel of it was comforting, but he found he liked Cecil wearing it better. He slid open the bottom of the watch, which would normally cover the battery and insides, and pressed the revealed button before he put it on. Once it was on, he twisted the analogue face counterclockwise and pressed the knob, causing the face to light up purple (he'd changed the color after a while in Night Vale) and emit a familiar whirring sound.

"A Sonic Watch," Martha breathed, marveling.

"I set it to monitor Cecil's well-being and linked it to the secondary sonic in my Danger Meter." Carlos explained. "If anything happened to him, I'd know."

"Carlos, that is the sweetest thing you've ever done for me!" Cecil remarked. "So that's why you came so fast when the StrexPet bit me."

Carlos smiled softly, squeezing Cecil's hand. Then, turning to the Doctor, he said "Here's what we need to do…"

As the Time Lords discussed the mechanics of Carlos' technique, Martha, who knew better than to try and keep up with technobabble, cracked open the door for one last look at the other desert world. What she saw was puzzling; there seemed to be a light on the horizon that hadn't been there before. It appeared to be coming closer, and everything it touched looked translucent.

"Oh sweet void…" Cecil, who had come to look over shoulder without her noticing, said. This drew the attention of Carlos and the Doctor. Upon seeing the light, Carlos paled and exclaimed "We have to get out of here, now!"

"Why, what's happening? What is that?" Martha asked as the Time Lords scrambled to positions on opposite sides of the console.

"Nothing good," Carlos replied as he and the Doctor activated a few controls.

"It is the unraveling of all things." Cecil stated, sounding like he did on the radio. "It is a Smiling God."

"Okay, Doctor, sonic on the right setting?" Carlos called.

"Yep!" The Doctor shouted back, pointing the device at the console. The Scientist did the same with his Sonic Watch.

"Now!" He shouted, and the two Time Lords activated their devices, filling the air with the sound of their whirring. The TARDIS began to shake as its engine let out that familiar wheezing sound. Unlike before, it did not die down, even as the shaking grew more violent, worse than usual.

"It's working!" Carlos shouted. "Keep going!"

A few minutes into the flight, the occupants found their feet lifting from the floor.

"Gravity's gone a bit wibbly-wobbly!" the Doctor remarked as he and the Scientist grabbed the console to keep from floating away.

"That means we're almost through the paradox!"

The flight out took longer than the flight in, but they soon enough landed, gravity returning abruptly.

"Well," the Doctor said, "that was certainly fun, wasn't it Martha? …Martha?"

Martha, they discovered, was nowhere to be seen. Neither was Cecil, much to Carlos' distress.

"They must have floated off!" The Doctor concluded. "They could be anywhere in the TARDIS."

Before they could start to search, however, they heard a series of wet slaps that turned out to be Cecil's footsteps. The radio host was soaked to the bone, and seemed somewhat panicked. Carlos rushed over to him, checking for injuries.

"Oh, you found the pool!" the Doctor remarked. "Where did that end up, by the way?"

"Only in one of the most vile, dangerous, lethal places I know of," Cecil replied, "the library."

While Carlos reassured his boyfriend that the Doctor did not have any Librarians on board and Cecil was in no danger of becoming a statistic, Martha walked back into the console room with several brightly colored candies stuck to her hair. "Doctor, is there a reason you have a room filled with nothing but Jelly Babies?"

"Oh, I haven't seen that room in a couple regenerations!" The Doctor exclaimed. "I thought I'd lost it for good!"

"How do you lose an entire room?" she asked, incredulous.

"It's an infinitely-expanding alternate dimension," the Doctor defended, "I can't be expected to keep track!"

"I certainly don't know where all of the rooms in mine are," Carlos remarked.

"Why, Carlos, you have one of these wonderful machines?"

"Yes, Cecil. I was planning on showing it to you after Parade Day."

"Never mind that!" the Doctor interrupted. "Martha, where is the Jelly Baby Room?"

With a roll of her eyes, she replied "Third left, next to the puce door." As the Doctor raced off to find it, she called out "Don't forget to brush your teeth!"

WTNV/DW

Two things came out of that find.

The first was the discovery that allowing a Time Lord who was already basically a Tigger in a brown suit to get a sugar rush was both awesome and disastrous.

The second was that Jelly Baby pizza became a menu item at Big Rico's.

DW/WTNV

"How did you end up in Night Vale, anyway?"

At Martha's question, the Scientist (and she still couldn't believe they'd actually found another Time Lord; it brought her back to the Face of Boe's last words, and she wondered if there were more) glanced at her. They were sitting in the radio station, where Cecil-once again wearing the Sonic Watch-could be seen in his recording booth, telling the town of Carlos' rescue. This was the first time Carlos had taken his eyes off of his boyfriend since the broadcast started, and Cecil kept sneaking glances in return. It was like they had to reassure themselves that the other was actually there. She found it rather sweet, to be honest.

With a half-smile, Carlos pulled a small object out of the pocket of his lab coat and handed it to her. Martha's eyes widened; in her hands was a fob watch, with circular symbols on the cover, just like the one the Doctor had hidden himself in while on the run from the Family of Blood. She gasped when she realized what she was holding, causing the Doctor to stick his head out of the men's restroom, where he had been playing with a floating cat.

"You're familiar with the Chameleon Arch, then?" Martha nodded, dumbstruck. "It seemed like the best option, as I wanted to forget that my home planet was destroyed." He grinned ruefully. "Night Vale has a way that I like better; drink to forget. The personality I constructed was identical to my own, so naturally I was drawn to the most scientifically interesting community in the US." He paused, smirking wryly, before continuing. "It worked until I figured out that time doesn't work here, and none of the clocks are real."

"They're not real?!" The Doctor interrupted. "I never realized that, they all run." It was a distressing thought for a Time Lord, and he marveled at the fact that Carlos could mention it so calmly and casually.

"Yes, they all run despite the fact that they're all hollow. Well, not all, some contain a gelatinous gray lump that grows hair and teeth. My Sonic Watch, which I gave Cecil, is the one true timepiece in all of Night Vale. In any case, I dismantled any clock or watch I could get my hands on, trying to find a real one, and this fob watch was fair game, even though I was convinced it was broken and wouldn't open."

"So once you opened it, why did you stay?" Martha pressed.

"I stayed for two reasons. The first is the wealth of scientific discovery the town contains. The second," he nodded at the recording booth, "just announced the Weather."

Inside the booth, Cecil had brought up a song (what that had to do with weather, Martha could not conceive) and stood, removing his headphones. He then exited the booth and went straight to Carlos, intending to use the few minutes the Weather allowed to start making up for lost time. Carlos was of the same mindset, and rose to meet him. They seemed to have forgotten the Doctor and Martha, who became involuntary spectators as their "catching up" became more heated and passionate. The interns (there weren't a lot of them, and despite the extreme caution they all practiced, one had died five minutes into the broadcast) who passed by during this smiled fondly as they either rolled their eyes or sidestepped the couple without a glance.

Martha and the Doctor, on the other hand, couldn't tear their eyes away. As the seconds stretched into minutes, they grew increasingly uncomfortable and felt as though they were intruding on something.

"Are they going to come up for air anytime soon, do you think?" Martha murmured.

"Well," the Doctor mused, "Time Lords have a respiratory bypass system so we can go a certain amount of time without breathing, and…well, I suppose that to live in Night Vale, you would need to have very good lungs…"

The couple broke apart when the Weather was winding down and Cecil had to rush back into the booth, hair mussed and clothes askew. Carlos, in a similar state, sat down next to Martha again and the Doctor wandered back to the bathroom. Martha allowed Carlos a few minutes to fix himself before voicing another question.

"How did you meet the Doctor?"

A choked noise came from the bathroom, and the Scientist would only divulge, amidst a lot of fidgeting, that there may have been an explosion involved. Or two. Because explosions were very scientific.

WTNV/DW

They said their goodbyes at the TARDIS, which was parked in front of Carlos' lab. The Doctor was excitedly examining his new Converses, and Martha held a woodcarving of the floating cat that Cecil had gifted her. She drew the two of them into a hug. "You take care of each other, alright?"

"We will, Martha." Carlos promised. "And you take care of yourself. I've heard what the Doctor's travels are like."

"We'll say a chant for you at the bloodstone circle." Cecil added. Martha chose not to comment. "And make sure you pay a visit. The two of you will always be welcome in Night Vale."

"Sure will!" The Doctor stated cheerfully, stepping forward to shake their hands. "Cecil, it was good to see you again. Scientist, I'll have a look at those calculations and get back to you. Also, correct me if I'm wrong, but there seems to be a sect of the Headless Monks in town."

"No, you're right. One of them steals babies for some reason."

"Must be radicals of some sort. Well, off we go Martha, got to stop off at Cardiff and refuel, there's a Rift in time and space that is perfect for that. So long!" With one last wave, he and Martha stepped into the TARDIS. Cecil and Carlos stepped back and laced their fingers together as they watched it take off.

They stood in silence like that after the last echoes of its distinctive noise faded away. After a few minutes, Carlos squeezed Cecil's hand and said "Come on, Cecil, let's go home."

That night, for the first of many nights, Cecil lay with his head on Carlos' chest, lulled to sleep by the double-beat produced by two hearts.

END

There it is. The idea of Carlos being a Time Lord was something I had been playing with for a while. If there is any confusion; after discovering that his home planet was no more, the Scientist used his Chameleon Arch to become human so that he wouldn't have to remember. During the events of The Phone Call, he opened his watch in desperation and once again became a Time Lord. No one, not even Cecil or his team of scientists, noticed because his human personality was a carbon copy of his original one, just without knowledge that he was a Time Lord. In One Year Later, instead of almost dying, he almost regenerated.

What Martha heard on the radio was episode 23, Faceless Old Woman. All texts came from the awesome tumblr blog cecilspeaks dot tumblr dot com.

More special thanks to mine and RasenganFin's coworker Marc, who gave me the idea of the Sonic Watch.

Thank you for reading! The Glow Cloud demands that you review. All hail the mighty Glow Cloud.