Korra

There was no way to know how much time passed. The pain just kept coming. It moved through Korra with a life of its own. It flared and pulsed with irregular textures, sometimes crashing through her like a wave, other times lighting her up like fire. Sometimes, the agony would ripple along her spine as though every muscle in her back were ripping apart, and other times it would pierce through her skull like a skillfully wielded dagger.

My name is Korra. I am the Avatar. I am from the Southern Water tribe. My parents are Tonraq and Senna. I was raised by the White Lotus. It is my duty to protect, serve and maintain balance in the world.

Korra had started chanting this mantra over and over, desperate to fight back against the pain that was stripping away her sanity.

It was as if a symphony of pain was being played on her body. There was no rest, no fermata after the crescendo. The music just continued to build, exquisite in its never ending torment. An endless lesson in the various textures of pain.

My name is Korra. I am the Avatar. I am from the Southern Water tribe. My parents are Tonraq and Senna.

The blinding white that had largely dominated her vision since the agony started suddenly flew outwards, appearing at the end of an impossibly long tunnel.

The darkness threatened to swallow her whole, and Korra desperately searched her mind for something to hold on to. Her grasp on who, and what, she was, slowly slipping like sand through a sieve.

My name is Korra. I am the Avatar.

The pain shifted. Instead of spikes or daggers, it transformed to a steady vibration of waves coming in increasingly faster intervals. Eventually her whole being was pulsing with it.

My name is…

Lightning lanced through Korra's body with a violent crash. Every muscle in her body spasmed, and she felt a sickening lurch as the larger muscles in her back and legs tore with an audible riiiiiip. Korra desperately hoped the sound was just in her head.

With a dizzying flash, Korra found herself standing in a dingy and dirty hallway.

She didn't need to look around to figure out where she was. Her nightmares visited this place often enough for her to immediately recognize her surroundings.

Sure enough, when she looked up, she could see herself kneeling in the dirt and grime on the floor, held in place by the blood that coursed through her veins.

Amon stood over Korra's body, a calloused hand roughly grabbing onto her wolf-tail, yanking her head back so she had no choice but to looked helplessly into his impassive mask.

There was no mercy. No compassion. Just coldness.

Sensing the inevitable, Korra snapped her eyes shut, praying with all her might for salvation.

Korra would never forget how it felt when that thumb brushed across her forehead. The touch itself was nothing special. It was barely a caress.

But with the touch, her insides had twisted so sharply, so… severely; even without the blood bending, she would have been unable to move.

All the air was forced out of her lungs as though her chest had been violently squeezed by a vice.

Korra felt her muscles slacken as Amon released his hold on her life force, and Korra was unable to do anything to soften the blow as her body crumpled to the floor in a heap.

"I told you I would destroy you," Amon hissed, his usually cold and calculating voice colored with smug vindication.

Amon had broken her bending. Unalaq had broken her soul. As soon as her thoughts slid to the fight with Unalaq's Dark Avatar, she found herself there.

She was kneeling, the ground of the Spirit World pressing harshly up against her shins as darkness incarnate reached out to caress her face. It spilled out of Unalaq's eyes and mouth like an oil slick, colors dancing on the edge of a dark and sickly spectrum. The twisting tendrils snaked out with lightning speed, silencing her fiery breath as she tried to keep the darkness at bay.

It was too late. He was too strong.

The feeling of Vaatu sliding into her through her mouth and nose was beyond anything she could have imagined. She could feel the essence of both the man and the spirit climbing into the deepest recesses of her soul, invading everything that made Korra who and what she was. When the tendrils of the Dark Avatar began to wrap around her connection to Raava, the world suddenly felt wrong.

Korra's world stopped when she felt her connection with the light spirit sever. The slow drag that separated the two souls seemed to last eternity.

To be honest, Korra didn't remember when Raava had been wrenched out of her body, or how Vaatu had slipped back into his host.

But she did remember the sting of Unalaq's water bending.

That first strike had been ruthless. The rest were relentless.

One by one, her past lives were wiped clean, blown away like smoke in the wind.

And it hurt.

The pain was surprising, disorienting, because it lacked a source. It hovered at the edge of Korra's existence, lancing through her soul in sporadic, irregular intervals.

Korra closed her eyes and screamed out her frustration, instinctively trying to pull her arms into her chest to curl around the aching pain that lashed relentlessly at her heart.

A harsh metallic click and sting at her wrists stopped the movement.

Korra's eyes flew open in panic.

No!

The absolute terror she felt as she fully registered the harsh bite of the metal cutting into her wrists and the sharp ache in her shoulders as her weight pulled down on her back and arms in an unnatural way was every bit as overwhelming as it had been the first time.

Korra shook and screamed in protest, exhaling her rage and terror in a searing pillar of flame, desperate to end the nightmare before it began.

She grit her teeth against the sob rising in her chest as she felt the ghostly agony of the metal poison being forced through her pores.

She shook with the effort it took to fight back her body's reflex to go into the Avatar State.

She felt the sickening lurch in her stomach as her whole being gave into the almost animalistic instincts of a spirit when threatened.

She relived every fall, every hit, every blow of her ensuing fight with Zaheer.

She gasped as the air was forcibly ripped from her lungs and cried out when her defeated body finally collapsed, feeling every torn muscle and broken bone with renewed force as it slammed brutally against the unmerciful ground.

Korra blinked furiously, trying to clear her vision as a figure blurrily swam into view.

The loving face of her father and the harsh and cold lines of Toph's profile flickered back and forth as though trying to merge into one.

Korra felt her body convulse violently, and suddenly the pain was back.

Too much! It's too much… Korra thought. I can't… I'm going to…

For a second time, she tasted bile and blood in the back of her throat, however the substance that came snaking out of her open mouth was thicker and infinitely more foul than the metallic poison that had twice been purged of her system.

Korra coughed and sputtered as a thick tar-like material slithered its way out of her throat. Her eyes burned and nose itched. She realized with horror that the tar was oozing out of her ears and eyes and nose and throat, blocking off all airways and making her head spin as she reeled from the lack of oxygen.

The swirling black mess coalesced in front of her face, gradually gaining mass as it was purged from her body.

As it grew, it rose up in front of her, a large and swirling column of black and maroon smoke that shone with a luminescent glow. Flashes of bronze were the only source of light as an oppressive darkness swallowed them both.

The menacing figure blurred as it zoomed closer, a single diamond drawing level with her eyes, piercing her with its omniscient gaze.

Then…

Nothing.

Just like that, everything stopped.

The pain. The light.

There was nothing. She was nothing. The darkness around her was nothing.

Silence. Oblivion. Peace.

In a moment that lasted a lifetime, all that existed was the void.

Eyes that were not eyes, looked around. Ears that were not ears, strained to hear.

There was nothing to be seen. Nothing to be heard. There were no eyes to see. No ears to hear.

A low hum began to resonate in the depths of infinity.

The vibrations flickered as particles of matter winked into existence with rapidly building speed.

It was negligible at first.

Then, with a dizzying shift, nothing suddenly became… something.

The void was suddenly filled with small specks of light, the surrounding darkness a thick and rich dark blue that wavered and flickered in hundreds of differing hues.

Korra… Listen to me. Listen to my voice.

And thus she had ears.

Korra. Look at me.

And thus she had eyes.

Korra looked around, trying to gain her bearings in her new surroundings.

She was nowhere. She was everywhere.

The space around her stretched out towards infinity, but never quite made it. It was oppressive, unexpectedly claustrophobic, yet somehow unimaginatively open and expansive at the same time. Lines of power throbbed through the air just beyond hearing, just beyond sight. There were no words to describe where she was, and trying to find them warped the space around her as if it actively resisting being labeled.

Come back to me, Korra. Speak to me.

Korra looked around with wide eyes, searching for the origin of the voice that resonated throughout the empty space around her in a ghostly whisper.

"Where… Where am I?" Korra rasped out.

The sound of Korra's voice didn't come from her mouth. It was more that she thought the words and they somehow manifested themselves in a rippling wave that radiated outward from her body.

For a while, nothing happened. Then, Korra noticed a slight difference in the textures of space out of the corner of her eye. When she turned to look, wisps of smoke and light swirled up in a light vortex, spinning up and around, finally settling to reveal a small and slight figure.

Korra looked down at the small body, waiting for the details and definition that would give a hint as to who it was to settle. When they finally did, Korra frowned in confusion.

The small figured frowned back.

Korra worked her mouth, trying to think of something to say. Her mind had gone completely blank, for floating in front of her was a small and perfect replica of herself. Only younger. Much much younger.

Were she to guess, Korra would have said the younger version of herself couldn't have been more than six years old.

"What's wrong?" Young Korra asked, tilting her head to the side and scrunching her face in blatant curiosity.

"I'm… Who… Who are you?" Korra asked, finally getting her voice to work. Unlike before, the sound came from her mouth. Her throat was dry and hurt from all of the screaming and the slight ache confused her. If she was in the Spirit World, the pain didn't make sense. Unless she visited in her physical body, pain wasn't something you experienced in the spirit world.

Young Korra scrunched her nose and giggled. "That's a silly question. I'm you, of course. But you already knew that." She tilted her head to the side, appraising Korra with a curious stare. "Why are you so sad?"

Korra blinked in confusion, as much thrown by fact that she was talking to a younger version of herself as the abrupt change in topic.

As Korra considered the question, her surroundings began to swirl and twist. They both sank gently through the air and landed on a ground that manifested beneath their feet. The sky lightened and expanded outwards, and the colors around her shifted and warped until it appeared that both of them were standing in a vast field of short cut grass.

"What do you mean?" Korra asked absentmindedly, looking around to survey her new surroundings. It was obvious she was somewhere in the Spirit World, but she had never seen anything quite like it. The Spirit World was usually full of life and light. This place felt… dead.

"You're sad," Young Korra stated. "Why?"

Korra ripped her eyes from the landscape and surveyed the youngster in front of her. The child had cocked one of her hips and was resting both hands on her waist, her posture and demeanor screaming that she clearly thought she was talking to an idiot.

Korra rolled her eyes at the sight before crouching down so she and the youngster were more-or-less at the same eye level.

"Well, I've been really hurt. They were trying to help me get better, and somehow I-"

"How did you get hurt?" Young Korra interrupted.

Korra closed her mouth with a snap and fought the urge to groan in annoyance. Had she really been this annoying when she was younger?

"Well… Some bad people were trying to do bad things. When I was trying to stop them, I got hurt," Korra patiently explained.

"Why are the people bad?" Young Korra immediately fired back.

Korra threw up her hands in frustration. "I don't know. They're just bad people."

Her patience was quickly starting to run out. All she wanted was to figure out how to get back to the real world, and she was stuck trying to explain her situation to an annoying toddler.

Young Korra frowned and tilted her head to the side with a thoughtful expression.

"That doesn't make any sense. They have to be bad for a reason."

"You're too young to understand." Korra said with an irritated sigh.

Young Korra continued to frown and walked forward until she was nearly nose to nose with her older form. Korra resisted the impulse to squirm under the suddenly intense gaze of her younger self.

"No, Korra," the small child began, reaching out a chubby hand towards Korra's face. "I think you are."

Young Korra's fingers brushed lightly against Korra's forehead and her world exploded in a flash of bright white light. When she managed to blink the stars from her vision, she found herself back in a dingy dark hallway. Korra wrenched her body away from the youngster in front of her and spun around.

Sure enough, Amon was towering over a memory form of Korra's arched and kneeling body, his thumb poised menacingly over her forehead.

"No! Stop!" Korra yelled out, unwilling to relive the memory again so soon.

Surprisingly, everything around Korra abruptly stuttered to a sudden halt. The image before her froze, and even the swirling motes of dust in the air stayed suspended in place.

Korra shakily walked towards the two figures in the hallway, walking around them in awe. Amon's hand had stopped mid-descent, and Korra's previous self's mouth was wrenched open in a terrifying scream, though she knew that in reality no sound had ever had the chance to escape.

Korra felt the brush of fabric against her thigh, and when she looked down, Young Korra was looking up at her with a thoughtful expression.

"What… What is this?" Korra asked, experimentally lifting a hand to wave it in front of the faces of the memories in front of her.

Nothing happened.

"Is this the bad man you were talking about?" Young Korra asked.

"No… Yes… Well. Kind of. He did hurt me. But it was a long time ago. How are you doing this?" Korra asked, gesturing to the space around her.

Young Korra shrugged, then pointed up at Amon's masked face.

"So why is he a bad man?" The youngster asked.

Korra wrenched her eyes off of the scene in front of her, and turned her gaze to the child by her side.

"He hurt a lot of people. He could take people's bending away. He took my bending away."

"So he's a bad man because he hurt you?"

Korra huffed in frustration, her earlier irritation with the youngster once again flaring up.

"No. He was bad before that. He—"

"When did he become a bad man?"

"Look. You're too young to understand. He was too powerful. He could do things no one else could!"

"So can you."

"Yeah. But that's different. I'm the Avatar. Plus, he abused his power."

Young Korra absently started picking her ear, her face the perfect mask of boredom. "And so did you."

Korra blanched at the blatant accusation in the child's voice, but when she opened her mouth to argue, one of the walls of the hallway suddenly blew outwards. It revealed a scene of Korra playing with the air bender children on Air Temple Island, racing along the walkways on balls of finely woven air. Just as she was about the cross the finish line, Korra saw her previous self's eyes glow with the Avatar State's ghostly gleam, and she darted past the competition to come in first.

As the scene in front of her faded back into a wall, Korra felt her cheeks burn in embarrassment and frustration.

"That's not the same thing," she growled out.

"It's not?" Young Korra asked, her brows drawn in confusion. "Cause you said—"

"I know what I said," Korra snapped, her tone a bit harsher than she had intended. "And that doesn't count! I was just playing then. What Amon did was different."

"How was it different?"

"He was using his powers for evil!"

"What was he doing that was so evil?" Young Korra was now carefully studying her finger, seemingly unsure what to do with it now that the tip was covered in goo.

"He had this stupid idea that the only way for everyone to be equal, everyone's bending needed to be taken away."

"So he was trying to make everyone equal?" Young Korra said with an innocent tilt of her head.

Korra grit her teeth. "Yeah! Wait! No! AHH!"

"You're right, Korra. He really does sound like a bad man." The child's voice positively was dripping in sarcasm.

Korra whipped her head around and growled in anger and frustration.

"Look, kid! You don't know what you're talking about. He—"

Korra was cut off as her surroundings blurred around her.

When everything settled, Korra again found herself if the desolate landscape surrounding the tree of time in the spirit world. Several feet in front of her, she could see herself fighting off Unalaq as he was overwhelming her with Vaatu's powerful presence. However, she could also see two blurring forms crashing through the sky as her battle with Zaheer played out above her.

"And these two... They are bad men as well?" Young Korra asked, seemingly oblivious to the violence around her and utterly uncaring of the panic that was rising in the Avatar's chest as two of the most terrifying moments in her life were playing out around her.

Korra winced as she saw herself crash to the ground with bonecrushing force, her heart stuttering in her chest as the all too recent memory of the pain flashed through her mind.

"Of… Of course they're bad… They…"

Korra recoiled in fear as Zaheer flew down from the sky and encased the limp body on the ground in a swirling vortex, the air forming a suffocating bubble around her past self's head.

Korra turned her head sharply to the side, unable to witness the moment that regularly haunted her dreams. She was immediately met with the sight of Vaatu's sick presence shooting out of Unalaq's mouth and slithering sickeningly down her other past self's throat.

"STOP!" Korra yelled out, her hands shaking uncontrollably.

The visions around her stuttered to a halt, just like one before.

Zaheer's arms were frozen in the middle of his sinister bending, his victim's mouth open, eyes wide with panic and fear.

Unalaq's face was split into a wide and sinister grin around the thick and vile substance protruding from his mouth, connecting to a Korra's head, thoroughly encasing it in Vaatu's unnatural and evil form.

Korra took a stumbling step away from the scenes around her, falling shakily to her knees.

Burying her face in her hands, she took a deep and shuddering breath.

"Why… Why are you doing this?"

Instead of an answer, Korra felt a warm hand gently prying her hands off her face. Young Korra was standing in front of her, a sad but kind expression on her face.

"You need to understand." She pointed a finger over at Unalaq. "What did he want?"

Korra sat back and pulled her knees up to her chest. Her earlier irritation had faded in her sudden spike of anxiety and fear. It seemed that she was meant to learn something in this experience, and the sooner she understood the message, the sooner it would be over.

"He… He wanted power. He was corrupted by Vaatu. He-"

"No! You don't understand. What did he want? The power… Merging with Vaatu… Those were the means. What was the end?"

Korra took sighed and rested her cheek on her knees, trying to focus on anything but the terrifying images around her.

"I don't know. To bring back the spirits?"

Young Korra smiled, flashing her teeth in a big goofy grin.

She then twisted around and pointed at the floating figure of Zaheer. "And what did he want?"

Korra looked up at the still and floating figure of Zaheer.

"He… He wanted to kill me…" Korra whispered, her voice broken and hoarse. "He wanted to destroy me. He wanted to destroy everything."

Young Korra sighed heavily and dropped to the ground, folding her legs beneath her.

"Korra. Stop. Stop and think. What did he want?"

Korra reached up and pressed her palms to her eyes. "I don't know. To kill all the world leaders?"

Young Korra hummed the affirmative. "And why did he want to do that?"

Suddenly Korra was fed up. She wrenched her hands away from her face and glared angrily at the child in front of her. "What are you trying to get at? Why am I here? What do you want?"

The child easily met Korra's angry gaze, completely unaffected by the venom in her voice.

"I'm trying to help you. You're so busy holding onto the pain you've gone through, you're completely unable to heal. You're so stuck on holding onto this ridiculous idea of good vs. evil, black vs. white, that you're completely missing the point of everything!"

"Oh yeah? And what point is that?"

"To learn. So what Did Zaheer really want?"

Korra threw out her arms in exasperation. "He wanted chaos! He wanted the world to exist in a world without leaders so the people were free to do whatever they wanted. He didn't understand the need for order and-"

"Yes. Korra. Thats exactly it." Young Korra interrupted. "He wanted freedom." The child leaned forward and pierced Korra with a serious and intense gaze."You have gone through some really tough stuff. But really think about the men you were fighting. Amon wanted equality, Unalaq wanted the material and spirit world to be joined, and Zaheer wanted freedom. Are any of those goals really evil?"

"No. But-"

"So instead of spending so much time and energy fearing your enemies, why don't you stop and try to learn from them. Grow from your experiences. Understand the world around you and your place in it a little better as a result of your triumphs, not in spite of them."

Korra squinted at the child in front of her. The childish act was utterly and completely gone and the look in the youngster's eyes belied an ageless wisdom that was suddenly very very familiar.

"Who… Who are you? Really?"

Young Korra smiled, her face radiating warmth and love. She stood and took a step closer, leaning forward until their faces were mere inches apart.

"I told you already, Korra." Reaching out a small hand, she gently caressed Korra's face with her fingertips. "I'm you."

Upon impact, the world around Korra exploded in a bright white light and she had to shield her eyes from the sudden blinding glare. When she removed her hands from her face, Raava's regal spirit form was floating lazily in front of her, emanating waves of light and love and joy in a constant soothing stream.

Tears immediately sprang from the Avatar's eyes as she studied the figure in front of her. "Raava," Korra breathed out in a reverent whisper.

Hello, Korra. It has been too long.

Korra opened her mouth to reply, but the joy and relief spreading through her body was so profound, she was unable to speak past the lump in her throat.

Korra. You have been through so much in so little time. Your experiences have chipped and whittled away at your soul, leaving you a broken shell. It's time to stop living in the past. It's time to let go of your pain and move forward, learn from your mistakes and experiences so you can grow.

The air around Korra began to shimmer and warp until it was again playing out various memories and moments in her short life. Korra saw herself growing up, always training. Always fighting.

A steady warmth began to grow in her chest, culminating in an uncomfortable ache.

So much of your experiences as the Avatar have been centered around vanquishing enemies. While you are undoubtedly a strong and powerful fighter, that is only half of what being the Avatar is all about. Being the Avatar isn't only about bending or power. That's not where your strength lies. It's not in your ability to vanquish foes or conquer enemies. It's not about solving political problems, or appeasing world leaders.

The images surrounding Korra shifted to a flickering montage of happy moments she had shared with her family and friends. She suddenly felt the need to gasp in a deep breath, struggling to get as much air into her aching lungs as physically possible.

It's about having the ability to look at the bigger picture and lead through example. It's about wisdom and love crossing all real and imaginary boundaries when reaching out to the people and creatures of the earth. The Avatar states no alliance, for in having an allegiance to one, they have an allegiance with all. They have no agenda for in wanting the best for no one, they want the best for everyone. And that doesn't come from me, Korra. That comes from the people I share my life with. That comes from you. And you must learn and accept who you really are.

Korra was distantly aware of the images around her, Asami's face more prominent than most in the memories surrounding her. However the observation was only fleeting as ache in her chest ramped up with a resounding pang. Korra felt a burn flash down her arms and legs and back, and was just able to see the etching of Raava's symbols race across her body before light suddenly exploded violently outward from the center of her chest.

The best way to define who you are isn't in what you've done, or how strong you are. It can best be defined by the lives you have touched, and by the lives that have touched you. It is measured in the love you feel and share with those around you.

As Raava's signs continued to twist and flicker across Korra's skin, she could only blink back tears as she gasped and choked on the sobs catching in her chest as she tried to catch her breath.

Learn to love freely, and you have learned how to live.

Raava's signs completely covered Korra from head to toe and she could feel the spirit merging with her soul, making her feel more complete and whole than she could ever recall feeling before. Korra closed her eyes as she basked in the sensation and let the light and love around her lull her into peaceful oblivion.


A/N: Hey everyone. Finally finished it. As a side note, I will be going through older chapters and tweaking them a bit along with the next update. There are a few problems I want to sort out, and I'll make sure to but an A/N at the top of the chapter to tell you which chapters to keep an eye out for. I want to give a special thanks for both Aurora Marie Williams and TinyValkyrie. Without them, I couldn't have written this chapter. As you know, it took FOREVER, and that was largely in part due to a seriously horrible case of apathy and writers block. They helped me fine tune the outline, work out the kinks and in some cases, gave me some serious inspiration so I could push from one section to the next so I could pull everything together and make this thing happen.

To be clear, the story still isn't finished. When it is finally complete, I will mark it so there will be no confusion.

As always, I love the reviews and PM's so keep them coming =)