"Erwin, I'm back."

The great Erwin Smith Danchou looked up from whatever his great mind was scheming on the papers spread all over his table at the sound of the door to the sacred grounds of his office being thrown open without any consideration of the fact that it was most probably closed for a reason.

There were only two people who dared to do stuff like this and Hanji left his door wide open after taking off to her laboratory some twenty minutes prior. That meant Levi was back from his trip to the closest town to buy whatever he so desperately needed (probably just some cleaning supplies).

The voice that followed only confirmed his deduction. He sighed. This will not be a pleasant conversation.

"Hello, Levi. It took you a while. Did you at least get everything you wanted when you spent the whole day on it?"

Erwin was puzzled by the smirk that appeared on Levi's face at that but he didn't let it show.

"I had to choose carefully. With some things you just have to take you time. But I pretty much got it perfect. Well, I only came to let you know. I'll leave you with your shit."

"Levi."

"What?"

However awesome of a strategist the great Danchou was, he didn't know how to let Levi know of what happened while he was gone in a way that didn't end in a bloodbath and the capital getting a wind of this...situation and thus making big trouble for everyone involved.

In a split second a great number of calculations ran through his head and he came to the final conclusion. If he doesn't say anything, maybe Levi won't find out until it's too late to do anything about it.

So he shook his head. "No... Nothing."

Levi raised his eyebrows at that but through the years he learned not to question Erwin. "Fine, I'm going then."

"Sure."

"Oh, by the way, do you know where the shitty brat is? I need to see him."

Erwin closed his eyes. To think he was so close to escaping this talk... It was already dark, so maybe only a few minutes more and he – they would be fine...

"...Erwin?" There was suspicion in his voice. The Danchou didn't have to look to know Levi was glaring at him with his eyes narrowed dangerously.

"Eren isn't here."

"...What?"

"He got... dragged off...? Or maybe kidnapped? It happened some two hours after you left."

There was fire of fury in Levi's eyes. Maybe he should have been more specific...

"Care to explain to me just why is nobody doing anything about the fact that the one kid that can't be left unsupervised is left to be kidnapped?" The calmness in his voice in contrast to the look in his eyes was pretty terrifying.

"It's not like I could do anything about it. But I sent Mike and Mikasa Ackerman with him in case something happens. They are the best alternative to you."

"I don't think I'm following. Stop spouting shit and just tell me what happened."

Erwin sighed again.

He just hoped this ended well. The situation was risky enough without a pissed-off Levi thrown into the mix.

"Okay, well... As I said, after you left, Dot Pixis arrived. Personally. He wanted us to let him borrow Eren for the day."

Levi's expression was unreadable as he listened to Erwin's short-version of the explanation. "What the fuck? What the fuck did he want him for and what the fuck were you thinking just agreeing to it?"

Erwin closed his eyes momentarily to quickly decide in private what he could and what he rather shouldn't say. "He's trying to make Trost into a functional city again as soon as possible and there were some pieces of the wall that were too big to move by his people alone. So he came to the conclusion that the easiest solution would be to get Eren to do the job. I complied because I need to stay on Pixis' good side. You know that."

Levi's eyes narrowed. "Just what are you planning, really?"

Erwin just smiled and shook his head. "It's all too soon to tell you anything right now, you know that too, Levi."

"Whatever. That's not what this is about, anyway. What are you going to do if something happens or if the Military police finds out about this shit? And the fact I wasn't even there when I'm supposed to keep watch 24/7?"

"You went to the town and left him here."

"That's beside the point."

"Not exactly. But to answer your question, we're just going to hope nothing does happen. We're improvising if it does."

"I don't like this at all," Levi growled as he threw himself (gracefully) into the chair on the other side of Erwin's desk and crossed his arms, thoroughly irritated. "Of course something will fucking happen."

"Oh? I thought you had more faith in Eren and his control."

"This is not about Eren. For god's sake, it's Dot fucking Pixis, Erwin. Don't you try to tell me you haven't seen the kid when he gets drunk."

At that Erwin laughed. "Well, honestly, Eren drunk is hardly a problem for the Survey corps; or the Garrison for that matter. There are only two types of people a drunk Eren ever causes problems to besides himself and I doubt there are any people there to suffer from second-hand embarrassment around him right now. If I know them, they'll all be either disgusted or amused. So that leaves only you." Erwin smiled sweetly as Levi scoffed.

"Yes. Because I'll be the one forced to deal with all of his bullshit. Again."

"You don't mind it all that much so stop acting like you do."

"Shut the fuck up, Erwin."

Erwin raised his hands in surrender but there was a sly, knowing smile on his lips.

Levi just glared at him.

With perfect timing, there was a knock on the door only a second later and Erwin immediately gave permission to enter.

The door opened to reveal Mike, who didn't lose any time. "We're back. Nothing... of significance happened," he announced as his eyes flickered towards Levi and the corner of his mouth twitched.

Levi feared the worst.

"Good. I don't need any reports on this so if that's all, you're both dismissed." Erwin said, although he threw his 'you better stay right where you are' look at Mike who only smirked in response.

Levi immediately shot up and took off.

"They're still in the stables!" Mike called after him, before closing the door to the office. He just had to share the new priceless pieces of information he attained while on this mission with his, dare he say, best friend. (He had to share with someone and even Levi had to admit Erwin was a better choice than Hanji. See how considerate he is?) (Not like he had a choice anyway if Erwin had anything to say about it.)

When Levi arrived to the stables, what he found wasn't really calming the feelings of dread. There was Eren, laughing like a maniac, throwing hay everywhere. (Levi will make sure he'll clean that up as soon as he's thinking straight again.) And then there was Mikasa, looking somewhere between desperate, sick and pissed.

'Definitely pissed,' thought Levi as soon as their eyes met.

He was convinced she was gonna punch him right then and there but contrary to all his believes, Mikasa strode quickly towards Eren, grabbed his collar and dragged him over to their Heichou.

"I'm not dealing with this any longer. He's all yours." She dropped the still laughing Eren on him before taking a deep breath and continuing in a low, menacing growl, "For now. We're definitely having a talk in the morning."

Levi groaned inwardly and thought, 'Just what shit were you spouting, you stupid, shitty brat...'

Outwardly, he just sighed as he took in the damage done. Eren was still laughing madly. A lot of damage. "Fine. Just don't believe everything he told you. It's probably heavily exaggerated."

Eren suddenly shut up. All eyes focused on him. "Levi? I hear Levi, I must be hallucinating. He left me after all..."

Levi rolled his eyes before giving Mikasa a see-what-I-told-you look. "I'm right here, brat."

Eren raised his (considerably teary) eyes to look at his beloved superior. For a long moment he only stared and stared but then he burst into tears and threw himself around a very, very annoyed Levi's neck, sobbing, "Levi! I missed you so much! Why'd you leave me?! What have I done wrong? Please, I beg you, don't ever leave me again!"

Levi was ready to just kill the brat and spare himself the torture but he didn't have his gear on so that option was out. He could only suffer through this until Eren either calmed down, sobered up or passed out. Whichever came first.

He could faintly hear Mikasa yelling at him from somewhere, "We're still having that talk tomorrow!"

If he at least knew what the talk would be about exactly he could think up some defences or something, because... even though Eren exaggerated when he got drunk, he never lied.

Mikasa was probably out for blood.

But he'd have to worry about her later. Now he had a drunk brat making a scene out of nothing to take care of.

Joy.

But he'd make the best of it.

The next morning would be very satisfying.

Levi was just finishing dressing up when he heard a quiet groan coming from his bed.

"You awake, brat? Good, you have some stables to clean as soon as you get up."

"Levi...? I don't... I don't think I can. I feel sick. My head is killing me... God, I feel really sick."

"Don't you dare throw up on my bed. There's some water on the bed-side table."

Eren groaned again in response, but he did mumble a 'thank you' after draining the whole glass in one go. After setting the glass back down he fell right back onto the warm, not moving (as opposed to the rest of the room) bed.

"Come on, brat, get up. Having a hangover doesn't excuse you from your duties."

"I'm trying, okay?" Eren mumbled without moving a muscle

"Certainly doesn't seem like it."

"Okay, okay. Just please, stop talking so loudly..." There was rustling as Eren disentangled himself from the sheets before the bed whined from the loss of weight. However, immediately after that all other sounds were drowned in a loud clang followed by a yelp.

Levi smirked as he looked back at Eren. "Oops. Forgot about that." It didn't sound like he did. "Like your gift, Eren?"

"Wh-wh... What the fuck is this?!" Eren whisper-screamed while violently tugging at the leash attached to the bed on one end and a collar sitting comfortably around his neck on the other.

"Why are you so surprised? I told you the bell was only a temporary measure," Levi explained lazily as he watched Eren struggle against his restraints.

"Are you being serious?"

"Absolutely. You're not allowed to take the collar off unless you're taking a shower. And the leash isn't leaving my hand unless we're going on an expedition since that would be highly impractical."

"I never agreed to this! I'm not doing this! Mikasa won't agree either and I know you'd rather not fight with her! Ah, shit..." He needed to stop shouting or his head was going to split in two.

Levi's smirk only widened at his next words. "Sorry to burst your bubble but it was originally Mikasa's idea."

Eren gaped at him, unable to produce a single sound at the news of his sister's betrayal.

Levi took in the sight of Eren, sitting there, with bed-hair, messed up clothes, broken expression... and a collar. He had to admit he liked what he was seeing. He liked what he was seeing very much.

"You know, you look really sexy in it. I must say, I chose well; it suits you perfectly. It was definitely worth spending all day looking for a satisfying one." Levi murmured as he affectionately stroked Eren's cheek.

The boy involuntarily blushed but still gave Levi an angry glare. "Is looking good in a collar supposed to make me feel happy? Wait, you mean you went to the town simply because you wanted to buy a damn dog-collar?"

"Yes. But I also restocked on cleaning stuff while I was at it," Levi replied as he moved on to the head of the bed to untie the leash so Eren could actually start preparing for the day.

Eren rolled his eyes. "Of course you did. You didn't even need any, did you? They just 'called out to you', right?"

Levi kicked him lightly in the arm. (He wanted to go for the stomach but decided against it at the last moment. The kid was having a nasty hangover in his room, on his bed.) "So what if they did?"

Eren pouted as he rubbed at the sore spot.

Levi shot him a glare, still a little irritated about the mockery of his cleaning habits. Was it his fault he felt better when he was absolutely sure there always was something to clean with if needed? No. No, it was not. In fact, everyone should be feeling that way.

Eren just rolled his eyes before reaching up to get rid of the humiliating piece of leather still adoring his neck.

However, before he could even come close, both his hands were slapped away and Levi was looking down at him with that reprimanding look of his, the untied leash in his hand.

Eren was staring in disbelief. "You're really, really going to go through with this?"

"Yes."

"..."

"Don't go looking like that. You shouldn't have gotten yourself lost so many times. I'm just trying to protect you. God knows what could happen next time. And besides..." Levi threw a smirk at Eren. "Yesterday you begged me so passionately not to leave you again... I'm just fulfilling your wish."

Eren visibly paled at that and slumped back into the bed, effectively hiding his burning face in Levi's pillow. "...Don't tell me anymore. I don't wanna hear it."

"Oh, don't worry, you will hear more. Mikasa's 'having a talk with us.' Well, with me but that means you, too, now," Levi announced as he lightly tugged on the leash to prove his point.

"Oh god... Just kill me now..."

"No can do. You have to clean up the shit you did in the stables first. And save humanity," he added as an afterthought.

"...Fuck humanity. Fuck the stables. I feel too sick to move. God knows what I told Mikasa yesterday. I have a bloody collar around my neck. What the hell happened to my life?" Eren whined with his face still buried deep into the pillow.

"Alcohol. But you will clean the stables or I will make you."

"Don't you care about humanity?"

"Not particularly."

"Don't you care about me? Don't you love me anymore?"

"This and that are two completely unrelated things."

"...You're too mean. I hate you."

Levi couldn't help but smile at the childishness. He leaned down and gave Eren an affectionate kiss on the top of his head. (As his lips were kind of inaccessible.) "Love you, too. Now get moving. First breakfast, then cleaning. Training in the afternoon."

"...I'm definitely gonna throw up."

"Then you're cleaning that, too. Just don't do it anywhere near here. I'm hungry, Eren. Bathroom. Now."

"Ugh..." Eren groaned in frustration and pain as he forced his heavy body up to a sitting position.

Where he stayed.

It was progress, at least, right?

Levi didn't think it being enough of a progress, though. He ruffled his (already messy enough) hair and added. "Come on, that was an order."

Eren glared up at him and mumbled. "I really do hate you."

"If this is 'hate', I don't think I want to know what 'love' would mean with you," replied the older man in a voice full of amusement as he watched Eren close his eyes and lean into his touch.

A/N: Okay, um... first, I wanna say I'm sorry... This took a lot longer than it should and could and my only excuse is that I'm not exactly a happy-most-of-the-time type of person and sometimes it's just difficult to write pseudo-cute/happy stuff... (Which seems to be the only type of stuff I am actually able to produce.) But I'll try not to take so long next time.

(I decided I'm gonna make 10 parts in total, even if people already forgot or don't care... I say 10, even though I have practically no idea what the 10th part should be about. But. 10. Because.)

Anyway, I don't really know how I feel about this but I tried to make the Pixis idea work... Even though he doesn't even make an appearance in the end... ^^;;