Paradise was good, Thomas supposed.

It was nothing like the Maze, the Scorch or Denver.

Paradise had green, lush trees, rivers and creeks, animals and even a beach. Paradise had everything.

There weren't any hideous, bulbous creatures just beyond the woods, waiting for a curious Immune to venture out so they can rip them to shreds without mercy.

He'd even kissed Brenda.

You could say everything was perfect.

Aside from one thing.

Newt.

The guilt that consumed Thomas was relentless and unforgiving.

Nothing was the same without Newt. There was a huge black abyss in his heart, that no matter how hard he tried, or anyone else tried, he couldn't patch it up.

Then there was Minho.

He couldn't tell Minho. He wanted to tell Minho, but honestly he was terrified Minho would hate him.

It was killing him.

Ripping him apart.

Thomas couldn't take loosing another friend.

Not another one. Not again.

Chuck. Teresa. Newt.

Even Jack. Thomas hadn't known him very well, Thomas had seen him writhe on the ground in agony in the freak lightning storm in the Scorch. There was nothing anyone could do. With his leg blown off, eyes blown out, hair singed. Such a horrible way to die.

It hurt to think about his lost friends.

But Minho had a right to know what happened to his best friend he'd known all those years of confusion and terror confined in the Glade. Thomas hadn't been there longer than a week. Imagine two whole years. Minho and Newt had become incredibly close.

The Immunes had only been in Paradise a little over a week and Thomas was ready to throw himself of a cliff. He was trying to handle all these emotions, stop them from becoming too overwhelming for Thomas to handle but he was struggling.

If the nightmares were anything to go by.

He knew people were starting to notice something was wrong. Brenda was constantly worrying about him. Even more so after he had told Brenda what happened to Newt. (Well he'd woken up screaming about it so he didn't have a choice but to tell her)

It was halfway into the second week when Brenda had brought up the topic. She held him tight in her arms as Thomas tried to keep himself from falling apart all together.

"You need to tell him" Brenda told her boyfriend softly while running her fingers through his hair.

"I think the only thing Minho would be angry about is that you didn't tell him straight away. Leaving Newt in the Crank Palace has been eating away at Minho as well and we kind of need our leader and second-in-Command to not be on the verge of a hysterical meltdown every second of the day and I want you to be happy. Don't want this to ruin your friendship with Minho" Brenda's tone was strict but soft. Thomas nodded numbly against her shoulder.

"Go right now!" Brenda held him arm's length away. "The longer you wait, the less you'll want to go."

"Thanks Brenda" Thomas said.

She smiled at him and quickly ushered him out of the hut, whispering encouraging words along the way.

Thomas looked at the black digital watch he'd gotten from WICKED when they were beginning the second trial in the Scorch. Anger suddenly washed over him and he pulled the watch off with a lot more force than necessary and replaced it with the black, simple, scratched up watch Minho had given him when he was learning the ropes of being a runner. He was a Glader, an Immune, not a part of WICKED.

Thomas took a deep breath and began slowly making his way to Minho's 'house' that looked to be more of a hut at this point. It was one of the first homes the Immunes had built.

Thomas cautiously knocked on the door. He had no idea how he was going to tell Minho he'd shot his best friend.

It sounded worse every time.

Thomas had shot Newt.

In the head.

He was no better than WICKED.

How could Minho every forgive him? Minho would never even look at him the same again.

He was a monster.

"Thomas?" Minho's commanding yet strangely comforting voice pierced through Thomas' thoughts. He jumped in surprise and almost fell backwards if it weren't for Minho's firm arms reaching out to steady him.

"I killed him" Thomas whispered complete horror lacing his voice.

Minho, still holding onto Thomas, looked at him strangely "What are you-"

"I killed him!" Thomas sobbed, finally letting the tears flow thick and hard after weeks of trying to keep himself together. "I killed Newt"

A wash of anger covered Minho's face and for a moment, Thomas had the sinking feeling Minho was going to punch him. He felt he deserved it. The anger however slowly drained from Minho to be replaced with a deep, internal sadness and complete resignation as Thomas explained.

"We were on our way out of D-Denver when I saw Newt. I-I got out of the car to convince him to come back" The tears continued to poor from Thomas relentlessly and he was shaking so hard Minho's arms were the only thing keeping him upright.

"Newt begged me to shoot him I-I didn't know what else to do, he looked so horrible and dirty and broken- I couldn't think of anything else to do. I'm a monster Min' I am so, so sorry. I don't expect you to forgive me-"

Minho tackled him into a hug, pulled Thomas to his chest, fists gripped on Thomas' shirt like a life line.

Thomas didn't know what was even happening at first. He'd convinced himself Minho would be furious with him and never talk to him again.

Minho was shaking hard as he hugged Thomas and it took Thomas a few good seconds to realise that Minho was crying.

Thomas had never seen Minho cry and it was easy to forget that their leader wasn't indestructible, was human and could in fact cry. The two Immunes stayed like that for a good few minutes, until Minho had calmed himself down enough to talk.

"Don't ever say that" Minho mumbled. "You're not a monster, Thomas and I forgive you." Minho's words were thick and muffled against Thomas' shoulder.

"You're not… angry?" Thomas couldn't hide the fear and doubt that was evident in his voice.

Minho shook his head. "Just sad" He paused for a moment thinking "And relieved I guess"

Thomas was confused but Minho continued before he could ask.

"I'm glad-"Minho sniffed, trying to get the tears under control "He's not suffering anymore and maybe being dead is a better option than watching yourself slowly slip further and further past the Gone and having no control over it. It's certainly a better option instead of suffering a gruesome death by another Crank, who knows what they'd do to each other. I'm glad it was you, he asked you to do it because he knew that I wouldn't have done it."

Minho pulled back to look at Thomas. His eyes were blood shot and he had tear tracks running down his usually grinning face.

"I'm glad it was you Tommy"

Minho calling him Tommy was oddly comforting and he enjoyed it despite that was what Newt used to call him and the painful memories that came with it. Thomas pulled Minho into another bone-crushing hug.

"I was scared you'd hate me Min"

"You're all I have left Tommy. We're family now whether you like it or not."

It was then that Thomas realised how much faith Minho had in him. It was little things, asking Thomas to stay at the back when their once large group of Gladers travelled. Minho trusted Thomas to look after the group. Minho passed things through Thomas before doing anything. Minho even convinced Thomas to be Second-in-Command in Paradise.

Thomas trusted Minho with absolutely everything as well. During the Maze, he'd been thinking about Teresa, then about Ben's banishment, then getting out of the Maze. In the Scorch he'd been mourning Chuck's death, thinking about if he liked Brenda, thinking about Teresa's betrayal and completing the second trial. In Denver he'd been worrying about Newt, thinking about his relationship with Brenda and Teresa and how to finally stop WICKED. He never had to worry about Minho because he'd always been there. Minho was one of the strongest people Thomas had ever met. After all, Minho wasn't Keeper of the Runners and Leader of the Immunes for no good reason.

Minho slowly began to wipe the tears from his face. "You're my best friend Tommy, don't ever forget it"

"Same to you Shank." Thomas grinned through the dried tears. "A run?" He asked "For old times' sake?"

"You're on Shuck-Face. From Frypan's shack in five minutes." Minho replied, playfully punching Thomas in the arm.

"Don't forget your Runnie-Undies!" Thomas called over his shoulder as he began to retreat.

Minho laughed loudly at the underpants reference from back in the Maze and disappeared into his house to get ready.

Thomas turned and ran back to the house he and Brenda shared and a warm, welcoming happiness suddenly filled him.

Newt would have wanted him to tell Minho what happened and would have wanted him to be happy for once in his traumatic life.

Paradise was finally starting to feel like Paradise.