Your name, is Karkat Vantas, and you are in love with your best friend.
You've been living with Gamzee for about 3 months now, and they have been 3 of the happiest months of your life. Sure, you've been busy with work and all, but that's life. You and Gamzee live in an apartment right off of a busy street, within walking distance to everything. You work every day from 8 till 6, except on weekends, with that and Gamz's part time job, you can pay the bills. Barely. After work, you and Gamzee usally watch one of your beloved rom-coms while snuggling on the couch. Tonight is no different. You and Gamzee are on the couch, you snuggled in a blanket, while your boyfriend is sleeping on the other side of the couch. Just as the main couple in the movie kissm and credits claim the screen of your tv, you hear Gamzee's phone go off. Thinking that it's just one of his stupid friends, you pick up the phone.
1 new message
Read - Ignore
Intrigued, you spare a glance at your sleeping partner, and shrug, it's not like you haven't been on his phone before . You tap in the password, HONK, and swipe to see the text.
Hey babe, what'2 up?
Guessing that it's a wrong number, your about to delete it when another message arrives,
He'2 there, ii2n't he? Damn, 2orry
Text you later, Gamz
You pause, this wasn't a accident. You look at the previous texts, there's not much.
Tuesday, 5:00 pm
Heyyy
What'2 up?
You comiing over toniight? Ii know your bf do2ent get off tiill 6
2ee you iin 10
All the messages are much like this.
Thursday 5:30pm
Gamz, ii mii2 you! When are you comiing over toniight?
Your mouth drops open, this must be a prank! One of Gamzee's stupid friends pulling a stupid prank, yeah. You are about to turn off the phone and go to bed when you see a response out of your eye,
2o, when are you comiing over?
StOp BeInG iMpAtEnt, KaRkAt CaMe HoMe EaRlY.
Fiine, ju2t make an excu2e
Bye
You feel your heart twist in your chest, that was yesterday. Your boss was sick, so you got off early and Gamzee... He went to get groceries. For a hour and a half. You feel tears streak down your face and you turn off the phone. You take a few deep breaths and place the device back on the coffee table. You quietly sob into the blanket, thinking of what you did wrong. What had you done wrong? You hear movement from the other side of the couch and feel warm arms wrap around you, you lean into the touch.
"What's got you up and all upset, bro?" Gamzee, the love of your life, asks,
You shrug and sob into his chest,
"Ah, it's that damn movie, right? Sorry, I fell asleep, but by the looks of it, for the best." the capricorn hugged you closer,
"Don't worry, babe, I'm here," he rests his chin on your head,
"I'll always be here."
You sob harder
《 》
You didn't say anything to Gamzee about the texts, just that his phone got annoying so you turned it off. The days went on as usual, only, everytime one of you went out the door, you felt like a part of you broke.
Would he see him again today?
Will he confess today?
The thoughts you had weren't healthy, you knew that. You knew you should tell Gamzee what you had seen, and then Gamzee would apologize, and that would be the end of it. Only, you never did tell him.
It was only after you had met a charming man at work did it occour to you that things needed to change.
"Well, it was nice meeting you Mr. Egbert." you gave a final farewell to the handsome man,
"Please," he had said,
"Call me John. "
You smiled, really smiled, for the first time in weeks, and accepted the papers that John gave you.
It was only 5 minutes later that you would notice that he left his number on one of them.
《 》
The thought that you could be happy with someone else was a nice one, but also a very bittersweet one. On one hand, you could break it off with Gamz, and start seeing John. But where would you stay? The house was technically Gamzee's, you had moved in with him, after all. The fond memory made you smile, the day that you moved in, Gamzee had carried you in through the door like a newlywed bride on her honeymoon. A voice startled you out of your thoughts, it was John.
"Hey, Karkat! You there?" John smiled,
"Oh! Y-yeah, what?" you stuttered back, caught off gaurd,
"I was just wondering if you wanted to go for a drink after work?" You never had told the man about Gamzee, it had never come up.
"I- uh, I mean-" you took a deep breath and looked the black haired man in the eyes,
"I would love to."
《 》
Thats all it had been, a drink. After work you and John went to the local pub and talked, you talked about work, then play. When the subject of partners came up, you were delighted to hear that John was 'single and ready to mingle' he had said with a smirk, you blushed at that. When the conversation came to you, you carefully avoided the subject, instead asking about John's family.
The night had been long, but good. You let John walk you home, at least, to the bus stop near your house. No kisses were exchanged, no hands were held, and you were absolutely drunk.
John had waved a final goodbye before turning away. The gesture had left you lonesome, but you trudged home. The cold air bit at your nose, since it was the middle of November. You got to the door of the apartment and slowly opened it, Gamzee was waitint for you.
"Where have you been?" he asked casually from the couch, but you knew better.
"I'm sorry, I went out for a drink and my phone died." you tried to sound as normal as possible, not letting your partner see how much you were leaning on the furniture.
"Well, you had me worried. Please just call me with a payphone next time." came the reply
You don't know what set you off, but it was something about the dark purple bruise you caught a glimpse of under Gamzee's collar.
"YOU CHEATING JERK!" you screamed, Gamzee jumped up, and screqmed right back,
" I COULD SAY THE SAME TO YOU!" the capricorn fumed,
You were taken back for a moment, "Y-YOU WHORE!" and that was it. Later you would blame it on the alcohol, or the peaked emotions. But right now, you had only yourself to blame.
Your hand shot out, seemingly on it's own, and connected with Gamzee's face in a fist.
Gamzee recoiled, as if he'd been shot, eyes just as wide as your own.
Tears streamed down your face and you ran, you ran out the door, down the stairs, and all the way to the park. You sat on a cold bench and felt the cold bite at your body, the wind chilling him even through your long sleeved shirt and sweatpants. You put your head in your hands and layed down.
《 》
The next morning you were woken up by the sun, warming you. Your teeth chattered and your fingertips were blue. You stumbled home and in through the unlocked door, not seeing anyone in the living room, you grabbed your jacket and slipped it on, breathing on your chilled hands. You walked into you shared bedroom, ready to break it off with your long-term boyfriend.
Somehow you knew what you would see. Maybe you chose to ignore the clothes strewn down the hallway, or the shoes that weren't yours at the door, not that any of it mattered. You had known what you would see, but that didn't mean you were prepared for it.
The two bodies on your shared bed, one of them was Gamzee. That was oubious. But the other one you didn't recognize. Not that they heard you.
You walked back down the hallway and out the door, not stopping even as you felt tears stream down your face, only slowing when you came to the pub, and you once again, succumbed to the darkness.
《 》
It was around 5 when you finally got kicked out of the bar. You walked home, again, your body shuddering at the temperature outside. A thin sheet of snow layered the ground, and more of the flakes lazily fell at your feet.
By the time you reached your house, the snow had covered most of the sidewalk. Yourehearsed your lines again,
'Gamzee, I'm very sorry for what I did, it was uncalled for. I think its time for us to see other people.' very short, very civil.
You thought about John, his smile, his eyes, and you felt your heart flutter. Something about the thought of him made you feel happy, ready to do what needed to be done. You walked past the bus stop, but suddenly stopped.
You saw him.
The one who had ruined your life.
And you ran.
You ran straight up to him, he had been walking towards a car, probably his own, youwalked up to him and shoved him as hard asyou could, he stumbled back,
"What the hell?" he yelped, whipping around to look at you,
"Aw, save it! You ruined everything! EVERYTHING!" a flash of understanding crossed the man's face,
"Oh, you mu2t be Karkat then." the man sneered at you,
"Ii can 2ee why Gamz cheated on you, now" he lisped,
You drew back your fist, having had enough of this, but the other man was faster. His hands shot forward and pushed you off balance. The simple shove was enough to send you reeling. With the new snow, and theforce of the shove, you fell back. Your eyes were open just long enough to catch a glimpse of Gamzee at the door of the building, looking stunned. But he had a bruise on his cheek.
Then the world went black.
Damn, your head hurt. You sat up, raising a hand to your head, thank god, you thought as you looked at your hand, no blood. You saw the man's face, the one you had been fighting with earlier, he looked like he was saying something, you didn't care. You brought your legs in closer to your body, your butt hurt, not as much as your head, though. The guy kept yelling, he waved his hands around, what was wrong with him? You looked to your right just in time to hear the screeching of tires and watch the car connect with your face.
《~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~》
Your name is Karkat Vantas, and you have regrets.
You regret hitting your boyfriend, you regret cheating on him, and you regret not getting to know John Egbert more.
But you don't regret holding Gamzee when he cried, or kissing him that first time under the oak tree in your front yard.
You made your choices, and you were happy.
You can only hope Gamzee was happy, too.